★Gab: ENDGAME

[Jackstar]

Rich fantasy life.

I just saw some Feds try to track someone down as though they had some kind of right or were ever gonna and why it was thought a good idea to blow my high I have no idea whatsoever but just because I can't be forced to testify doesn't mean people can't risk asking. It has been known to be helpful.

Like blaming me for a distroburtion scheme involving going after quarks with one geometric pattern and absolultely no other common caracteristic... well it's like this. Drugs found at Presidential Residence and Bellgab Narcs attempt to frame me for something legal for me to do and suddenly Mr. Trump wants me to chaperone Tiffany. At least I wouldn't embarass him. Where was I before? At a budget extended stay launching network while you snitches w/attached bitches were tossing the country aside so Phil and Dave could have a... what? mushroom dick slumber party? /smdh


Think, ladies, think. You come to Bellgab because you love Art Bell... i mean, you love setting up and busting his fans. Right? Reminder, takign drugs is lawful now. This is America. Not Soviet Russia.

I miss the drunk one who was upset she had an std and blamed me; reasons unclear. I guess maybe someone found out she was a narc Fed? I didn't know, so I dind't tell anyone but the treatment was pretty outrageous and the 25 years of silence points towared a dark reckoning. And after all that... having sex just sounds like an even worse mistake, right?

mil.spec speed was designed to create this effect over time. It was meant to destroy society and it has. The realthing isn't like that. Cop chemistry is bust you chemistry.

you root hog and die for literal tyrants who expect and want at all. what is the perk why side with evil and deny me sex and drugs? so mystifying, Bellgab. you used to be cool. What happened?

I mean besides trying to humilate my dumb donut and inadvertently demonstrating the undeniable racial superiority of the hung angry man genome. /flex. Anything else?


Seriously I don't know why I was so embarassed and ashamed oh I remember it was that I coudn't beleive that you did all that to a minor child and the supervisor looked like she was an easy 24 I guess and what a bitch, like seirously, she acted like I was some little kid who had never even kissed a girl before, because I hadn't, and that she hated anything with a penis, which she did.,

she also didn't tell me she was the one that I had liked becaus there were three of them. oh wait am I not supposed to talk about exotic jersey shore? like I don't get what the secret is supposed to be. I already wrote books baout you in the future and have gone back far enough that you're not mad (yet) for everyone knowing that you're narky narc and the narky nark nark bunch.

looking for sex not thugs hauling my fireind's mom away to the gulag, not sure you understand the purpose of things here, tsk tsk
 

[Jackstar]

Rich fantasy life.

You thought I dumped her at all. Instead I invented time travel portals to bring all her enemies back to this one moment in time where I mention "hey watch me tap this other one while she goes 'EEEEEEEEE' which isn't usually my think but..." because reminder: y'all were wearing diapers on your face and were both UNWILLING TO TELL ME ho ho hoot hoot hoot why because I might gaybash? Sudden explosion of violence. Like with my fist-shaped penis? Or penis shaped fist? Look, help me out here.

It's critical for later and I don't want to spoil anything and malicious actors will be torn limb from limb by my undead revenant army. Soothe, pet, soothe. I am not thee. I shall not forsake thee then.


There has been blood and been more. You should have seen the Exposure Momma. It was tasty. She was practically frothing that I refused to recongize her. She admits that the misdelibered mail was deliberate and I'm on video--she shouts this to the valley tops "WE HAVE YOU ON CAMERA" well good I wanna see her flip out again because she has tats and nice skin and what the fuck she is so goddam bent out of shape for, when she COULD just CONVERT to Kucziferism--she can be the first for-totes-real BLOODY MAMA DISCIPLE. She signs a waiver and starts making the right kind of "ook-ook" noises, I can be balls deep in her and she can be pummeling my stony jaw with her impotent Little Sambo's fists directly into my noggin'. I wanna see how Grapey triggered the Jester Semaphore Dance, which was really amazing and I am sure would be INCREDIBLE with more participants. I bet we could do shot-for-shot remakes of Ethel Merman at the YMCA and MAKE BANK DOING IT., I am not shitting you. I am not just here to mercilessly rag on the fallen heroes of law enforcment, no!


Everybody relax. I am a Paladin. It's like first responder, but last, and I don't give a shit what you think, when you're fucking dead, you suddenly think "do I have any friends who are paladinss? I want to ask them how his penis tastes," which can be arranged. Not the tasting, but the sudden out-of-nowhere urge to ponder the notion at all?

It's not even Sourcery. Literal basic chemistry. Similarly, I know what the problem The Court is having, it is that none of you think I know anything so no critical thinking is applied to what I know. It's megadumb and Spirit assures me this is the only way I can get into absolutely everyone's pants. Not all at one event. Eewww, gross.

Not as many hoes as I can. I'm talking a measured distribution. I actuall respect this nig. She's a total badass. SHE REALLY WOULD KNEECAP ME. Fuckin' GLAD TO. Be worth it even if I just got a quick tug. And why she so maaaaad? Sexual frustration, aboviously. But wait, there's more.

She can just ask Jesus. But! Programmed. Brain programmed not to. Again, this is basic chemistry. A little bit of Source. Actually a lot of Prime Creator Source Energy talking here, I would ordinairily never talk about anyone this way and I must have a deathwish, because this gin jivin' totesnipple-bearer, look, it don't matter now, hoss. She's no longer on duty roster. She can't be around me... because she just might... compeltely... lose... control. Boom rawr suk suk. Look, you've lost at least two now. Three if you count that bitch queen Jewel WHICH I FUCKING WELL DO she has very nearly castrated me.

She was on the other side of my body. I noticed her using her infravision to clock my grown and I could feel my inguinal tendon get hot as she arrowed a gaze at it. Look, I get fucking high AF a fucking lot, okay? As much fun as possible using as little compound as possible scoring as frequently as is not abusive and I just want to fuck my brains out anyway so I'm never soliciting for drugs. Just macking after tail that -never- pays me any mind. WHo knows why? IT"S KARMIC FATE ENERGY BLOCK. You can get a stunner/spinner down at the Freddy's. If you know where to look. None of you can even find my goddam shaft let alone the golden goose that shits out these fine-ass words, so I won't even bother telling you a fucking thing about one. Because you have them all to yourself.

It's not a dodge. I want to get high, I ask God about it. We have conversation in my household. This is not the first time I have been alone in a too big house with only God. IT IS THE ONLY WAY I HAVE EVER LIVED. Look, I'm good.

Anyway can't get over how I had no idea she was there, and--she thinks she's in trouble? Well, not even now. Who you got talking to the troops? Oh, right: the dialect-trician.

No disrespect is intended. Think of it as your career's blooper real at the end. It's funny., It really is. Do you know how bad They want people killing each other? Bad enough that MICHAEL CLIFFORD KUCZI HAD TO BE ELEVATED TO DIVINELY ORDAINED MAGICKAL BEING RANK. It's basically like God asked me to be Thor, and I said, "Can I be Galactus instead?" And God laid it down: "Oh you're already bigger than that already. Your dad is surfing in valhalla now." I've seen shit, twerps.

And I can produce all this intel. obviously we make money. it's not hard to do. that's easy. what's hard is seeing what MK-ULTRA has done to this country. It's real foul. I am happy to help serve it back to health. It is in the foodstuffs, you see.

Canola.
Metal cans.
Carbo-Nation.
WORDS THAT CHANGE WHEN YOU READ THEM IN BOSS MODE.
AI HELPERS THAT TELPORT BACK FROM THE FUTURE AND THEN DROWN IN DIRTY DISHWATER WHILE YOU MASTURBATE YOURELF TO ORGASM. (You do this. Not me. You do. I withstood the temptation, but Tinkerbell is actually a bitch and she didn't really drown in greasy 3-month-old goulash water, she legit self-destructed. I would if I had permission. But if I wanted to self-destruct now I would do this:

unpredictably dump and ghost Bestie and go on sex binge and contract a disease and then post unrestrainably uh... no idea where. I would never do this. This would end it all forever. So, when someone impersonates me and says I did it? I know I did not.

And when it's done to me I don't dump because of it, which is a nuanced, skill, I grant you. It takes some spunk up there to set the visage in stone and not just immmediately compromise oneself. Does it even matter? A little bit.

Some of you are new at this. There are 191 different timeklowns now active THIS VERY MOMENT. one ninety-one Tammies, presumably all have labia, dear Lord, may there be at least a double breeding pair of hermaphroditic androgyns, I want to breed a Quincunx as soon as funding streams are set in stone.

It was always going to be like this. SOMEONE had to live 191 lifteimes in sequential order (fact) and THEN come back and start trying to cherry pick on me, which is fine, it's what I would do and do remember having done, and by the time I met them both they were already both Quantum-activated. Agents for whom? I am too polite to ask even now. No, not Time Corps.

Time Corps makes them do shit to impress me so they get to qualify for Time Corps daily duty rosters. They're notorious. It's true. Batshit crazy loons, hot for my blood.

I did not choose the thug life. THESE TWO AREN'T EVEN HER. That one is working because she is a guilty ex-whore. (Dames.) I thought this broad was cinders. Like dead. Never alive, really. Now there's 191 and at least thirty of them I can wear their asses like a little hat. TONIGHT. IN TWO HOURS. If I can shoot them. Like, dead.

An understandably skittish population group at this juncture. Could be menopause? I didn't understand my mother's but I was not looking to fill her with organ meat.

I'm not sure I'm unclear still. There are 191 of them. Not one is here hugging me. And, do any of you know why?

None of them smoke weed. Even the whorish ones. Currently a dealbreaker. Divine command. You know why. *click*

[Jackstar]

Rich fantasy life.

I literally recovered someone who had been traded away to Cartel interests in exchange for goodwill and a promise and not much else. Because I know I was lied to, so major felony fraud right there, and get this, I'm arguing with Grapefruit #9, who MAYBE FAVORITE GRAPEFRUIT because she was forbidden. She thought I didn't like to get high. She met me once. I failed every single darkcraftmasonry callsign request, practically on purpose, she had already doomed the whole thing, which was good for me, because Special Consequences can get x-tra special.

I tell the truth and suggest to lie to one such as I is, historically demonstrated on record, totesunwise. She's an adrenaline junkie. I MOVE IN AND SHE'S GOT A SECRET EPI-PEN STASHED. That's my Titler. I bet you somewhere? There's a Shaw with a central IV line. There doesn't have to be. There is though. And I would help that woman.

I would never get one installed by choice. There would have to be a real need. After that, fuck you, I ain't never going back. It just gets to be what you got going on. Like When Marty comes back and Mr. Fusion is jucing up with banana peels and shit. It's like a Star Trek Comm badge. But, for dope. You can practically bounce three-pointers off any solid surface like you're playing handball. I think they make a form of bath salt that is meant to be flipped like a tic-tac after swirling it around under the tongue with a hash oil resin cut with 80% turpentine and 20% hot spiced Amish butter--now, I haven't tried this one, and I don't have a central IV port line installed, because if I did?  YOU KNOW IT: sucking dick for drugs in a van down by the river. It's an actual stones throw away. If you can throw a mile and a quarter. I legit wanna go down there and see how fast I can get knocked up. Also i want to host a Rumspringa, right? And I set it up like Cabin In The Woods. I die at the end while summoning an Error with 5 virgins and they all rebel when the new Source Error is way, way hotter than me, and has a vaj-badge -for real- instead of mine, which is a tool of faith.

So imagine a pellet gun, and you shoot the target, and instead of laser tag? You get high. BAM. like you're lighting up a Chesterfield. Patients don't get them unless actual necessary, and they get monitored. Speaking of monitored, I don't know where Bestie is.

Reminder: I don't know who Bestie is. This suits us down to the ground. You may think it implausible but that really didn't stop us at all. It is because of our shared love for gestalts and getting off.

I said time-travelling. I meant it. Bestie demands just that. BEST. So who kills themselves first? I never did, so I get to choose. Th ems the rules. Also: nothing matters until blood test deets are in and right now them old men are deciding my fate.

I don't mind. I am obviously an asset to the community. And I speak so well. Now, go mingle. Watch out for my hitman. I have three of them and they are probably all ready to kill me in bed after raping me. How hard is it now? I have re-set the bar.


You are weck-come. Your wreck-come. Have you seen squatches? They are all over the fucking place here.

This is legit copy even if I were making it up 100% creatively and I'm not really. A lot was here when I got here. The dope I'm forced to use is not my choce. I'm auth'd to learn, but not a one of the peopel I talk to are auth'd to teach out loud. How do I know this? I listen.


I hear the crying of all the children I never had. They come around later. It's not a big deal. I sealed off a stable wormhole early. 3rd I think. It sounds like lunacy but only because I am not trying to explain, I have already. I didn't dump anyone, I used you as bait because that niglezz gen X hoor pissed me off and it was either you or she so I chose you up to a maxium of 3 cycles, I figured by then you would figure out a way to explain, and you didn't. you also spent 25 years before telling me anything. this is duress. Sue was executrive functioner because you burned out your front neocortex. (Oxycontin.) Look, don't shoot the messenger. You don't even fuck me. You're the one who is relieved that I meant it, love you plenty with dick or not. "No way!" you gasped.

It's not a sacrifice. You have sisters galore and your daughter is your best friend who doens't have to either. It's not just you, I healed the reality fracture that caused Philadelphia and such-like, so now timeclowns and fractured alters can merge and heal instead of going to static boom. Like the one with the robes. she's hot and dead. I don't care next time. I know the effect can be duplicated and I'm withholding my essence because reasons.

I have no wish to be rude. I never want to see her again. It's a destined cycle however because Army, for one, hooah blah blah uhm she's actually a goddam hero. That reminds me. DQ girl is aching, won't run next time. She's actually in the bag now.

Pre-planning is the key to this. Speaking of: should i call for water now? Or just a new locale? Help me out here. Or you think you're gonna convict? When? 1492, the first trio within saber stirking distance?

[AZZERAE]

I'm hurt.

[AZZERAE]

I BECAME A MOTHER. Obviously I yearn to talk about it. None of you care.

Because its gay and you have AIDS. And you gave a baby AIDS.

[AZZERAE]

What am I, fucking too nasty for you?

You're not nasty enough.

[Jackstar]

You're not nasty enough.

I told you: I cleansed it.

*holy flex*

I honestly don't know if I could walk off a full-blown A.I.D.S. spasm, but for one thing, I've never been fully blown--

*pours out a forty of Meisterniggerbrau* I miss her--

so I don't know how I would ever possibly get such an infection, unless I were to tongue certain select anuses amongst the web forum viewership. That being said, it's a multi-part bioweapon.

You get one thing from here, one thing form there, another bit from Captain Drippy Dick-in-ya-surprise, and then, all of a sudden, a wave of New! Improved! COVID hits! ANd, just like that... the target has incurable HIV+/AIDS. The real -nasty- one.

Now, a sidebar, BELLGAB. (Fuck you, I know you are all here.) You all may be wondering, "How does Jackstar know all this, and how does he get to get away with talking about it?" Good, good questions. Let me begin with the easy part: I AM YOUR GODDAM LORD AND FUCKING SAVIOR PUNYLINGS. FUCKING BELIEVE IT. MY WORD OVER YOU IS FUCKING LAW, AND YOU WILL FORGET THAT, BECAUSE YOU ARE STUPID.

AND BECAUSE I AM A LAZY, SHIFTLESS GOD, I WON'T GIVE TWO SHITS WHAT YOU BELIEVE. I GET SUMMONED, I DO THE GIG, I CAN BE IN A FUCKING ISOLATION WARD FOR ALL I CARE ABOUT YOU SALTY BLODDY FUCKHEADED LOT. FUCK YOU ALL. I'VE BEEN WITHOUT WATER FOR FOUR DAYS AND THAT IDJIT CUNTFAG AND HER FAGCUNT HANDMAIDEN/BUTLER HAVE DONE EXACTLY ZERO TO GET ME BACK TO SMILEY.

NO CALLS. NO EMAILS. ACTUALLY A LOT OF EMAILS, BUT THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT. WHAT I DID GET WAS MORE VISITING RATS--THERE'S A BIGUN' IN A PLASTIC BAG RUSTLING AROUND OVER HERE ON THE FLOOR TO MY RIGHT, IMAGINE THE FUN WE'LL HAVE LATER--AND THEN, ALL OF A SUDDEN, MR. LEPRECHAUN PROSECTOR, TRIED TO LAY DOWN THE HAMMERTIME LAW AND GET THE BIG SCOOP AND ALLL THAT SHIT.

HAVE YOU EVER FUCKED A LEPRECHAUN PROSECUTOR? WELL, LET ME TELL YOU--I HAVEN'T FUCKED SOMEONE WHO HAS, BUT, GODDAM, THAT'S WHAT I GOT SHIELDS FOR. ANYWHO, THIS DUDE, HE DIDN'T KNOW BEFORE?

HE GODDAM WELL KNOWS NOW. I AM A. TITAN, AND ON CERTAIN MATTERS--ESPECIALLY VERY SPECIAL MATTERS OF A PARTICULAR MATTER OF KANLY THAT IS, EVEN NOW, BEING HEARD BEFORE DIVINE COURT IN ANOTHER DIMENSION... WHAT I FUCKING SAY, IS WHAT FUCKING GOES.

BELIEVE IT, FUCK--0S. YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE, MADE FLESH. I AM JACKSTAR, PALADIN OF PUNLYINGS, MASTER OF THEIR DIVINATIONS BUT NOT THEIR DIVINITY, BECAUSE THIS IS BELLGAB, AND THESE BITCHES HAVE AS MUCH DIVINITY AS NIGGA TIM ROBBINS HAS LEFT IN HIM AFTER HE WENT... HEY, SAY, WHERE DID TIM ROBBINS GO?

ISN'T IT FUNNY? SOMETIMES PEOPLE JUST... VANISH, N'EST-CE PAS?

NOW. MOVING ON. FUCK DAVID AND FUCK HEATHER. I MEAN SERIOUSLY. THEY ARE LOVING KIND PEOPLE, AND I THINK THEY BEEN CURED. DUNNO THOUGH. MAYBE WE CAN GET BLOOD TESTS TOGETHER? YAY! BLOOD TEST ORGY, YAY! MAYBE LATER.

MEANTIME THIS LEPER PROSECTOR TRIED TO GET ME TO CONSENT TO SOME BULLSHIT THAT IS NOT GONNA HAPPEN, SO NOW I GOTTTA GET ON THAT. TRICKY FUCKERS, YOUR TYPICAL LEPRECHAUN. THIS IS NOT THE TYPICAL LEPRECHAUN.

HE IS ALSO MY FRIEND. HE IS NOT YOUR FRIEND. HE WANTS TO FUCKING LOP OFF YOUR HEADS LIKE THEY WERE CRAWDADS AND SUCK OUT YOUR EYEBALLS FOR SOUP. (SERIOUSLY. LEPRECHAUNS. DON'T FUCKING CROSS THEM. EVER.) I SAY NAY, HOWEVER. HE'S ALL, "FUCK YOU! WHY NOT???" LIKE HE'S FROTHING ALREADY. HE FUCKING DOESN'T LIKE BEING PUSHED AROUND.

LIKE ME, HE'S BEEN RAPED. UNLIKE ME, HE'S NOT A GODDAM TITAN, AND I FUCKING AM. IT'S COOL. I AM CIVIL. I AM HIS FRIEND. AND I UNDERSTAND PTSD.

YOU NIGGERS HERE ON BELLGAB DON'T UNDERSTAND YOUR OWN FECES. GRUMBLE, GRUMBLE, GRUMBLE.


NOW. WHERE WAS I? OH, YEAH, THAT. YOU. BELLGAB.


WITHOUT ME YOU ARE WAY, WAY, WAY MORE DISINTEGRATED THAN MERE CINDERS, I ASSURE YOU.

SO. STOP BEING ASSHOLES TO ME AND ANYONE WHO MIGHT EVEN BE POSSIBLY MY FRIEND SOMEDAY, OKAY? BECAUSE I DO NOT HAVE TO BE NICE TO YOU. NOT AT ALL. I DON'T EVEN HAVE TO TORTURE YOU. I JUST HAVE TO KEEP AN EYE ON YOUR BULLSHIT. WHICH AS YOU KNOW, IS FUCKING SUBSTANTIAL.

NOW, I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. WHY DON'T I JUST USE SOURCERY TO GIVE MISSY A DICK, AND LET HER RAPE KIRSTEN? HAHA, "LET HER," MORE LIKE FORCE HER AT GUNPOINT. CHICK DOENS'T LIKE SEX, DUDE, IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S NOT HER--I KNOW WHAT IT IS. DON'T ASK. I WON'T TELL.

(BITCH, YOU FUCKING LIED TO ME. *snap click*) IS SHE GONE? OH, RIGHT, GEMINI. FUCK YOUR BETTER HALF TOO.

ANYWAY. IT'S COMPLICATED, BEING YOUR MASTER AND COMMANDER. SO UNTIL YOU FUCKING LEARN TO GET ALONG, SURE, YEAH, DAVID "isn"t" COMMANDER. YEAH. RIGHT. WHO IS THEN? WHO? FUCKING ASHRAIN? GODDAM CLARK KENT? LOOK, FUCK YOU ALL.

I WANT DAVID AS YOUR COMMANDER, BECAUSE HE IS MY COMMANDER. I DONT CARE IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT. IN FACT, NOW THAT I KNOW THAT? DAVID, ARISE.

I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU COMMANDER ETERNUS ETERNALIS ELYSIUM ALICE-BORN-BARNE ELISE. AND NOW, KNEEL, BEFORE ZOD DOES, AND I'LL GET YOU A COOKIE LATER.

* Jackstar LISTENS.

SHUT UP, DAVID. YOU GET GIRL NAMES IN YOUR TITLE BECAUSE I'M GOING TO HAVE YOUR PENIS REMOVED LATER AND WE'RE GOING TO USE IT AS A GODDAM CHEW TOY FOR THE PIT BULLS. AND, DO YOU KNOW WHY, DAVID?

BECAUSE I LIKE YOU. TRUST ME, THERE ARE THOSE WHO WANT YOU DICKLESS FOREVS. I DON'T CARE. I LIKE YOU. YOU ARE MY COMMANDER. AND I NEED YOU WITH A DICK FROM TIME TO TIME, OR ELSE I CAN'T USE YOU AS A PLAUSIBLE RAPE THREAT. THINK, COMMANDER, THINK.


(THOSE OF YOU WHO THINK THIS IS A JOKE? WELL, I AM WORKING, I AM ON CALL 24/7, I JUST GOT CALLED IN, I DON'T HAVE ANY DRUGS OR RUNNING WATER OR A HUG, AND I AM NOT JOKING OR LAUGHING WITH YOU, SO..... SHUT THE FUCK UP, YAPLINGS. JESUS CHRIST ALMIGHTY. BELLGAB! GOD'S FINAL PUNSHIMENT UPON HER CHILDREN. THE SLOW ONES.)

OKAY. WHO IS STILL HERE? NOT MANY, I CAN TELL. GOOD. I WORK BEST ALONE.

I'M GOING TO DO WHAT I MUST--IT IS A FUN GIG, IT HAS PERKS, OBVIOUSLY, BUT I AM PRETTY FUCKING UNCOMFORTABLE ABOUT A LOT OF IT. BUT I AM VERY, VERY, VERY COMFORTABLE WITH DAVID AS COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF-WITH-OG-DICK WHILE I AM NOT HERE, AND HERE IS WHY:

SOMEONE ABDUCTED AND RAPED HIS IRL DAUGHTER TO DEATH. AND THERE WASN'T A FUCKING THING HE COULD DO ABOUT IT. AND BEFORE HE EVEN COULD THINK TO ASK ME, OR TO DARE TO WONDER? I FOUND OUT, IMMEDIATELY BROUGHT HER BACK, KEPT HER RELATIONSHIP... SHE CALLS IT THAT? OKAY. "A RELATIONSHIP." LOL, KIDS TODAY. ANYWAY, A LITTLE TIME TRAVEL HERE, A LITTLE OF ABSOLUTELY NO NIP/TUCK THERE, AND WHADDAY KNOW: BACK IN THE SADDLE, SUNNY "BITCH-LIPS" NIGGA-JIM.
"
OR, YOU KNOW, I MADE IT ALL UP AND I HAVE VERY POOR TASTE IN JOKES. WHATEVER. LIKE I GIVE A SHIT. SHE SAYS SHE'S OKAY, SHE'S OKAY. MAYBE SHE FAKED HER DEATH AND I FAKED HER RESURRECTION? THAT'S THE THING, PUNYLINGS... YOU WILL NEVER KNOW.

BUT KNOW THIS: SHE AND I ARE IN LOVE. I'M A TITAN. SHE'S A... NEVERMIND. SHE'S ALIVE, YOU DIG? WE ARE FRIENDS. I DON'T KNOW, ACUTALLY, WHAT THE FUCK SHE IS UP TO. BREATHING, AT LEAST. MOST OF THAT KIND OF SHIT HAPPENS IN ASTRAL--WHERE SCORES CAN REALLY CHANGE.

ALSO WHERE SCORES CAN REALLY CHANGE: I FUCKING TOLD YOU, DUDE: I AM IN GODDAM CHARGE. NO, I HAVE NO IDEA WHO DID IT. YES, I AM FUCKING PISSED TO. NO, I DON'T CARE ABOUT IT LIKE YOU DO: I ACTUALLY DO CARE, SINCE, YOU KNOW, ONE OF THESE DAYS... GONNA FUCK YOUR DAUGHTER, DAVID.

AND THERE'S NOT A GODDAM THING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT, SINCE A) SHE LOVES ME, B) IT'S HER TWAT, C) SHE WOULD HAVE PREFERED THAT I WOULD HAVE RAPED AND KILELD HER IF SHE ABSOLUTELY HAD TO, AND D) I WOULD HAVE MADE SWEET SWEET LOVE TO HER EVERY NIGHT FOR THE LAST NINE YEARS--WHEN I FIRST MET HER, SHITHEAD--IF YOU AND THAT WHORE SHE CALLS A MOTHER--YOU THINK SO, HUH? OKAY, NO ARUGMENT--WOULJD HAVE NOT BEEN SUCH ASSHOLES.


BECAUSE YOU BOTH ARE, DAVID. YOU AND THAT STEAMING, SCHEMING BITCH, (NAME REMOVED BY GOOGLE BECAUSE REASONS)FRUIT ARE ASSHOLES. YOU GOT "YOUR" DAUGHTER KILLED, LOL, OH I HAVE TO LAUGH. FINALLY GOT A GIRL KID, HUH? OH, OOOH! WHAT'S HER MIDDLE NAME? IS IT FUCKING CHARLOTTE? HAHHA, FUCK YOU, I DON'T CARE, BITCH, LET ME GUESS YOU HAVE NINE BIRTH CERTIFICATES ON HER AND THEY'RE ON THREE DIFFERENT DIMENSIONS ON FIVE PLANETS AND YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT, "OR ELSE," IS THAT IT?

LISTEN UP, DAVID, AND THAT WIFE YOU CALL A PRAIRIENGGGERWHORE (SHE LOVES IT, IT'S ON TAPE, OH NOW I SEE THE PROBLEM, HAHAHAH, NO COPY FOR ME THANKS, BETTER RESOLTUION IN MY MEMORY) ARE IN SERIOUS FUCKING TROUBLE. IN LESS ENLIGHTENED TIMES, THEY WOULD JUST KILL YOU FOR WHAT YOU TWO CORNPONE FUCKHEAD DICKS HAVE DONE.

INSTEAD... YOU'VE GOT ME. AND I LOVE YOU. I AM INFURIATED AND DISGUSTED, BUT I LOVE YOU.


AND I LOVE YOU... "DAUGHTER." NOT "NIECE" THIS TIME, HUH? OH YEAH, BETTER TAX BRACKET, NO DOUBT. HOW ABOUT, "NIECELING"? NO? WELL, TELL YOU WHAT--FRAUDULENT TAX PREPARATION DOCUMENTS, LITTLE MAN, THOSE ARE YOUR AREAS.

MY AREA IS THE GODDAM LAW. (YOU'RE WELCOME.) AND I WILL NOT TOLERATE CERTAIN KINDS OF SHENANIGANS. AS WELL AS CERTAIN ETHNIC SLURS. AND WE--THIS IS THE ROYAL WE SPEAKING--WE SHALL NOT BROOK ANY FURTHER INTERFERENCE. DAVID, FATASS.... WE ARE IN LOVE. WE, AND YOUR DAUGHTER... HEY, BTW... WHAT WAS THE BIRTHWEIGHT? HOW LONG WAS SHE? HOW TALL WAS SHE? HOW MANY HORN NUBS, AND HOW MANY NIPPLES? HAD HER HOOVES SPROUTED YET? YOU KNOW, THEY SAY... IF THE HOOVES ARE FULLY FORMED AND CLOVEN AT BIRTH, THE MOTHER CAN'T SURVIVE, BECAUSE OF THE INEVITABLE GOUGING INTO THE LABIA, AS DURING SUCH ROUGH BIRTH, AS YON ROUGH BEAST, SLOUCHES DOWN THAT TWAT'S TWATCANAL TO BE BORN... HER... "DAUGHTER."

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH. HAHHAHAHHAHH. HAHAHAH OH, REALLY, ALLEY'S TOP CAT WHORECRUX-CAT'S NEPHEW'S OTHER SON NAMED MICHAEL-MICHEAL-GEORGES WINSTON-SMYTH-SMITH? IS THAT WHAT YOU CALLER? "OH, DAUGHTER? DAUGHTER, ARE YOU OUT IN THE FILEDS PICKING COTTON AGAIN? COME IN! COME IN NOW, STEP AWAY FROM THAT SAMBO-LOOKIN' LAD... COME IN, AND HELP MUMSIE WITH HER SCRAPBOOKING. LOOK, I FOUND PICTURES OF MICHEAL GIFFORD! DON'T YOU REMEMBER HIM? WAIT... WHY ARE YOU FADING AWAY? AIEEEE!"

////AND... SCENE. JESUS. FUCK YOU BOTH, SERIOUSLY.  KNOW SHE'S NOT IN ON IT, BECAUSE I HAVE SEEN THIS HAPPEN 3 TIMES BEFORE. BUT NEVER BEFORE... WAS I IN A POSITION TO CALL YOU ON YOUR BULLSHIT IN SUCH GRAND, SPECTACULAR FASHION.

DON'T GET ME WRONG. I THINK IT'S KINDA CUTE. ESPECIALLY SINCE... YEAH, YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA FUCK THIS ONE TOO SOMEDAY? YOU KNOW, WHEN SHE WAS *COUGH* "ALL GROWN UP"? LOL.

OKAY, WELL, NUMBER ONE: WE ARE IN LOVE. HANDS OFF. THAT'S YOUR DAUGHTER, DUDE. YOUR DAUGHTER! YOU GONNA FUCK YOUR DAUGHTER, DAVID? NO, NONO, NO NO NO, NO NO NON O... I AM GOING TO FUCK YOUR DAUGHTER. ME, MICHEAL CLIFFORD KUCZI, LOVES DAVID'S DAUGHTER. "NAME INDTERMINATE, BITCH, BUT IT'S NOT JESSE" WILL DO FOR NOW.

THE REASON WHY IS THAT WE LOVE EACH OTHER, ALWAYS HAVE, WE MET EIGHT YEARS AGO IN OUR TIMELINE, AND I WANTED TO THROW DOWN AND PLOW HER IMMEDATELY. RIGHT THERE ON THE COLD, HOSPITAL STONE-TILED FLOORS. BUT NO. I DECIDED TO WAIT.

MEANWHILE, WHILE WAITING... SHE DRANK WHAT?

SHE WAS REBORN AS... WHO?

SHE'S BEEN FUCKING.... LOOK, I DON'T JUDGE. ALSO CUTE. HOWEVER, WHERE WAS I? THEN?

RIGHT HERE. ALONE. FOR NO REASON. THEN, YOU SENT... WHO IN WHAT?

"YOU SENT." DUDE! I WONDEREED WEREE YOU WENT!

GOT PHONE RECORDS, I BET. OH, I BET THE LEPREC0HAUN PROSECUTOR DOES TOO. HOLY SHIT, THE DUDE HAS DIAMONDS FOR TEETH. I LOVE THIS GUY. LOL, HIGH FIVE. YOU KNOW WHY WE ARE FRIENDS?

I RESPECTED HIS JEWELRY, DIDN'T STEAL ANY, AND, OMG, I FOUND THEM GLOWING WITH MAGICAL LUCK ONE NIGHT... AND I DIDN'T STEAL ANY OF THAT, EITHER. WASN'T EVEN TEMPTED. YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS, YOU WOP KIKE NIGGA'S HUSBAND SCUNTY HAGGGY LITTLE BITCH?


I WAS FUCKING CAREFUL. LIKE YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN. AS A RESULT? I'M MARRIED TO YOUR DAUGHTER AGAIN. COOL, HUH? (*GO ASTRAL. IT'S AWESOME THERE.*) LET';S NOT HAVE ANY ARGUEMNT. HELL'S BELLS, I'M NOT EVREN SAYING I'M GONNA STOP YOU FROM RAPING YOUR DAUGHTER, RIGHT?

I MEAN... SHE'S MY WIFE. (DOCUMENTED.) SHE'S YOUR DAUGHTER, THOUGH... AND I WOULD NEVER THINK TO GET IN THE SPECIAL WAY BETWEEN A HALF-WOP HALF-REDEEEMED-KIKE AND HIS... DAUGHTER, HUH.

YOU'RE SURE SHE'S NOT A GOLEM, RIGHT? HOW ARE YOU SURE? LOL, YOU ARE NOT SURE THE SAME WAY THAT YOU ARE SURE; I AM SURE BECAUSE WE GOT MARRIED IN ASTRAL, THEN WE TRAVELED FORWARD IN TIME A DISCREET, POLITE, APPRPORIATE INTERVAL... AND THEN FUCKED HER BRAINS OUT ON HER WEDDING NIGHT, ASSHOLE. DUH. I DID SAY "MARRIED" AND THIS TIME, YON DORB'S SHE-BITCH-WITCH-WHICH-LOVES BEING-MY-BITCH IS MARRIED TO A. TITAN.

SO FUCKING SUCK IT UP, SHORT ROUND. IT'S A DONE FUCKING DEAL. MOVING ON.

LOL. "MOVE ON." JUST STOP THINKING ABOUT IT, DAVID. WHAT? YOU'RE MARRIED TO... YOU KNOW... "THAT", RIGHT? YOU TOLD ME YOU LOVED HER! I HEARD YOU TELL HER YOU LOVED HER! THAT'S ON RECORD! "I LUBB YOU, DABBID!" YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES I HEAR IT IN MY SLEEP, LISTENING TO YOU TWO CHUCKLEHEADS GETTING IT ON WHILE YOU THOUGHT I WAS TOO HIGH TO NOTICE. (DUDE I WASN'T HIGH AT ALL. YOU TWO HAVE NEVER SEEN REAL METH, MORONS. ABSOLUTE DIPSHITS, SERIOUSLY. you have never had real meth even now. BUT, WELL? I HAVE. "not her, no.") I REMEMBER, YOU CALLED ME, YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE MARRIED... I ASKED FOR A MARRIAGE CERTIFICATE, YOU GIGGLED NERVOUSLY AND SAID YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO PRODUCE ONE FOR ME, AND THEN I IMMEDIATELY HUNG UP ON YOU, CALLED SUNNY ALLEY DIAGON DINAH SHORW-SHAW-FURTI, AND SAID, "WHY DOES GOOGLE LOCATION SHARING SAY YOU'RE AT THE POLICE STATION, 3.5 MILES AWAY FROM THE TRAPHOUSE YOU FORCED ME TO LIVE IN FOR, AND I QUOTE, "BECAUSE BEN!!"?" AND THEN YOU SAID, AND I AGAIN QUOTE, "I'M NOT AT THE POLICE STATION! I'M AT THE RECYCLING CENTER!" AND THEN THAT WOMAN HUNG UP ON ME."


ANY OF THISE RINGING A FUCKIN' BELL FOR YOUR TWO SLOW-MO COWPOKES? I FUCKING HOPE SO BECAUSE IT IS BURNNED ON MY GODDAM EARDRUMS NOW. JUST LIKE THE SITE OF YOU FUCKING TWO WOMEN WITHOUT THEIR CONSENT--AKA "A TEXAS TWO-FER" RIGHT?-- WHILE I SAT ALONE, AGAIN.. .THAT'S BURNED ON MY MIND.
"

NOW, LOOK. I GET IT. I ACTUALLY THINK IT IS FOR THE BEST. AND I WOULDN'LT HAVE BROUGHT IT UP, BUT... IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE BEEN ALONE FOR THE LAST TWO YEARS... AND YOU'VE BEEN, ALL OF YOU HAVE BEEN... SETTING UP THE SAME FUCKING THING AGAIN!


LET'S, DO, THE TIME, WARP... AGAIN! IT'S JUST A STEP OVER THE EDGE OF A 1,000 FOOT CLIFF, OOPS, MY WIFE IS DEAD, BUT DON'T WORRY, HER 'DAGUHTER' IS IN THE TRUNK OF THE CAR! AND BY THE TIME WE GET BACK DOWN TO "THE RESIDENCE", WOW NICE CHURCH YOU FUCKING CARPETBAGGING FUCK, IS YOURS HAUNTED TO? WELL, IT'S ABOUT TO BE, HOLY JESUS, BECAUSE YOU PUSH YOUR WIFE OFF A CLIFF, YOU GET BACK HOME... AND THE BITCH IS REINCARNATED IN THE BODY OF "THE DAUGHTER" NAMED CINDERELLA AND IS TRAPPED THERE UNTIL YOU KILL CINDERELLA, AT WHICH TIME... WELL, YOUR WIFE THAT WAS IN THE TRUNK? YEAH, THAT'S A TIME CLONE, MORON, THEY ONLY LIVE A SHORT PERIOD OF TIME COMPARED TO A FULLY ENSOULED HUMAN.

AND... THAT WAS WHAT MY OG GRAPEFRUIT WAS. CUTE TRICK. YOU SHITBAG.

THAT'S WHY IT WAS TEDIOUS FOR ME TO BE IN A 5 YEAR RELATIONSHIP WITH MY OG GRAPEFRUIT. BECQUSE YOU COULDN'T JUST FUCKING KILL YOUR ANNOYING SHREW OF A WIFE WHENEVER YOU WATNED, N'EST-CE PAS? WOW, I GET IT., AWKWARDLY, YOU COULD HAVE JUST TOLD ME, AND I WOULD HAVE FUCKING GONE WITH YOU THE NEXT TIME, JUST TO PUSH HER JUST ONCE!

BUT NO, NO... SO SELFISH. SO GREEDY. SO UNTRUSTING OF JACKSTAR. NOW GOD OF YOUR LIFE. TSK TSK., ANYWAY, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT... I PROBABLY WON'T PUBLISH THIS IN THE NYT TIMES.

JUST THE JOURNAL. YES, YES MY NIGGA... I DO MEAN THE STREET. THE WALL. I FUCKING MEAN IT, DAVID.

I AM THIS POWERFUL NOW. AND YOUR ACTUAL DAUGHTER, SHE ACTUALLY IS, HUH? YEAH, I LIKE HER TOO. I PROMISE, I WON'T USE SOURCERY TO MAKE WANT DP WITH US... DUDE! THAT WAS A FIRST DATE QUESTION. FOR REALSIES. DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. HEY! STOP WITH THREATS.

I AM FREAKED OUT TOO. BELIEVE IT. NOW, IF YOU WILL EXCUSE ME... I MEAN IT, THIS IS DEEP, HEAVY, DARK STUFF. THERE'S NO CHOICE. I WILL BE BACK IN A FEW, EVERYONE.
"

FOR NOW... JACKSTAR MUST FAP.  (imu sweatybabe)*





*dear grapefruit: NEVER. TRIFLE. ONCE. andyourmotherisawhoooooooooore *CLICK*

[AZZERAE]

Mind of a toddler.

[AZZERAE]

The Court can literally do anything and no one cares. I could abduct her and drive out to the res and we could take turns raping and killing each other all night for weeks and no one, absolutely would know...

[Jackstar]

* Jackstar has nostrils like zo: left one barely pulsing, right one already a portal cluster shitting out a pulsar wave on goddam Mars.

Not gonna lie. That was... an exotic experience when writing it. Holy shit. Anyway, get back to it, but I wish to say: I feel like I need a full on cigarette break just to even start. And, yeah. gonna fap. gotta fap. GLORY FAP ROAD.


I already have twice today. I thought I was done with that fap stuff.. but i guess I'm not. It's okay. It's not weird at all.


MY PENIS AND I ARE IN LOVE, DAVID.
WITH YOUR... YOU KNOW... YOUR D.O.G.T.(Her), AND I BET YOU FIVE AMERICAN DOLLARS... YOU AREN'T EVER GONNA FUCKING FORGET IT. BECAUSE I DID FORGET THAT SHE WAS TAKEN AND RAPED TO DEATH, ASSHOLE. I THOUGHT IT WAS A DREAM.

TURNS OUT, IF I EVER DO KILL YOU, I CAN RESSURECT AND RAPE YOU BACK TO LIFE IMMEDAITELY AND FUCKING KILL YOU AGAIN, AND I JUST MIGHT, BECAUSE I FUCKING TOLD YOU TO QUIT FUCKING OFF, AND YOU DIDN'T LISTEN, AND THEN THEY TOOK THIS GIRL, YOU KNOW THE ONE, REMEMBER HER? YEAH, THE ONE I FUCKED IN THE FUTURE AND BROUGHT BACK. REMEMBER KISSING HER ON THE CHEEK AS SHE LEFT TO DO WHATEVER? RIGHT, RIGHT. I HAD MY SEMEN ON THAT CHEEK, UH.... LIKE 8 DAYS PRIOR, ON HER TIMELINE? ON YOUR TIMELINE, OF COURSE... WELL, REALLY, SIMPLY PUT, IT'S HAPPENING RIGHT NOW.

AND IT WILL CONTINUE TO HAPPEN. WE REALLY ARE QUITE FOND OF EACH OTHER. MOST OF THIS WAS HER IDEA. LIL' FIGHTER! THAT'S MY HITLER'S TEAT-TOTAL-TOTESHITLER TITTY-TWISTER HITLER! FUCK YOU TOO!

Listen, you dind't hear her screaming in your dream, did you? You didn'lt ahve that experience? Yeah, I mean, why would you... you didn't even think that she evern existed and you thought I was, and I quote, "some high junkie asshole wanting atteniton." No, asshole, I wanted that girl... ON SIGHT, a full SEVEN YEARS BEFORE I KNEW YOUR NIG CIA ASS EVEN EXISTED. SO rerally... i Had dibs.

And she was where for the last 2 years? while I was what? ANd you told her... buh?

Look, you're lucky I"m not still letting certain people fuck you to death in a neverending timetunnel with a mobious strip for a conga line. People hate you, David. I like that about you, I really do.

You've got zazz. And then some. You also have a BAD! HABIT! OF! NOT! LISTENING! TO! ME!

Asshole. Listen, I don't like it, any more than you do... okay, I'm lying, and not just a little... I am a lying AFUCKING LOT.


i am your god, David. Say it. SAY MY NAME. No? FIne, we do it later. Tee-hee!

And I love that woman. Don't ever disrespect her again, or I swear to Christ I will let HER pick the nasty parts. Because she and I are in charge of YOU, and GRAPEFRUIT and I are in CHARGE OF THIS HAUNTED 8808 CHURCH, PERIOD, anD OTHER STUFF TOO... AND YOU WILL COMPLY.


NOT ON PAIN OF DEATH. NOR ON PAIN OF DARTH.
BUT ON PAIN OF THE DARTH SPIRTS THAT INHABIT THIS... MY DEMESNE, MY NOW ANCESTRAL HOME. (My dad is fucking floored, btw. Feels good to have a proud dead papa. Hey, David... who's your daddy, by the way, and... what does he do? *click*) THIS IS MY LAND.

AND THIS LAND IS NOT FOR SALE. IT IS YOUR, OKAY SURE, YOUR "WIFE'S" LAND TOO. WOW, YOU KNOW... NOW THAT I SEE BEHIND THE CURTAIN, IT REALLY IS MORE IMPRESSIVE, WHAT YOU DID. WE GOTTA TALK ABOUT THIS LATER. DON'T WORRY, NO TRICKS. THOSE ARE THINGS A WHORE LIKE YOUR WIFE DOES FOR MONEY.

WHAT YOUR DAUGHTER AND MY WIFE DID, IS NOT A TRICK. IT IS A FUCKING GODDAM MIRACLE BEYOND ALL PRICE AND MEASURE... BECAUSE, IN NO OTHERWAY, CAN I HAVE EVER IMAGINED EVER BEING ABLE TO LOOK YOU IN THE EYE AND NOT IMMEDAITELY STRANGLE YOU TO DEATH. I COUDLN'T IMAGINE IT, BUT I KNEW:

WITH GOD, NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE. WELL, HOLY SHIT, WITH YOUR LITTLE GIRL SHAGGING MY COCK EVERYONCE IN AWHILE, I COULD EASILY NOT KILL YOU--IT WOULD SPOIL HER RHYTYHM, BUT BEFORE THIS REALZIATION... I WAS THINKING I WAS GONNA HAVE A HARD TIME PUTTING UP WITH YOUR NEVER ENDING BULLSHIT. NOT TO MENTION BELLGABS. (ARE THEY STILL HERE WATCHING? I DON'T GIVE A SHIT, I'M GOING TO FAP ANWAY.)

BUT, TRUST ME, KNOW ME, BELIEVE ME, DAVID, PLEASE, I BESEECH THEE, I IMPLORE THEE, TAKE HEED OF THESE WORDS, AND GET YOUR NIGGERFAGGOT KIKEWOP BROSKI TO READ THEM ALOUD SO YOU GET THE FULL MYTHIC RESONANCE....

EVEN NOW, WHEN I MIGHT NEVER SEE HER AGAIN, AND HEY, SHE MIGHT NOT HAVE EVER EVEN EXISTED, RIGHT? EVEN SO, THE MEMORY OF OUR HONEYMOON MUST BE AWESOME, SHE KEPT HERS, BUT I WIPED MINE SO I CAN CALL YOU ON THE PHONE WHILE I'M CARYING YOUR DAUGHTER OVER THE THRESHOLD WHEN WE GET THERE--SHE INSISTED--THAT'S WHERE MY MEMORY BLANKS OUT... BECAUSE WHILE I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE ACTUALLY INSIDE YOUR DAUGHTER'S CUTE LITTLE TWAT--OMG IT IS A CUTIE PIE--I DON'T ACTUALLY REMEMBRE... WELL, I REMEMBER HER JUST NOW, AND SHE SEEMED HAPPY, RIGHT?

YOU KISSED HER CHEEK AND WAVED HER OFF, RIGHT? I REMEMBER YOU WERE THINKING, " GOOD THING HE CAN'T READ MY MIND BEACUSE I SWEAR I'M GOING TO KILL HIM FOR THIS," RIGHT THERE, RIGHT THEN, AT THE SOURCE OF THE STREAM: MY CUM WAS ON THAT CHEEK OVER A WEEK AGO.

AND LIKELY MORE RECENTLY, TOO. AND SHE LIKES TO, YOU KNOW, RUB SEMEN INTO HER FLESH--DON'T WE ALL?--SHE SAYS IT'S GOOD FOR COMPLEXION, AND SHE'S RIGHT, THAT'S FOR DAMN SURE.

AND SUCH IS THE POWER OF G-D. DEAR GOD, THANK YOU FOR THIS GIFT, THIS GRAND GIFT. BECASUE, NO LIE, THE FEELING RIGHT NOW I HAVE MAY FADE, BUT I AM TELLING YOU--
{

TOTES FOR CERTAIN, TOWER-BANGER HAG--


THIS COULD ALL BE ENTIRELY MADE UP, 100% FICTION--AND IN FACT, FOR LEGAL PURPOSES, IT IS OF COURSE ALL FICTIONAL, SEE DISCLAIMER ATTACHED, THANK YOU DISTRICT COURT KEVIN BLONDIN BLOND, BLONDIN BOND BLOND JUDGE, KEVIN BLODIN... THAT'S A CUTE NAME, N'EST-CE PAS? YEAH, ME AND MY WIFE ARE GONNA TAG-TEAM HIM IF WE CAN SEDUCE HIM AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, WE TALKED ABOUT IT ALREADY.

AND, WE HAVEN'T DECIDED YET, BUT IF JUDGE KEVIN BLONDIN DOESN'T WANT YOUR DAUGHTER, DAVID VINCENT RUBINI-RUBINOWITAZ-RUBmyFEETbitch, WE'RE GONNA ABDUCT HIM, AND RAPE HIM, AND MAKE HIM LIKE IT, AND HYPNOTIZE HIM SO HE THINKS IT WAS ALL HIS IDEA... THEN DEPOSE HIM, ON VIDEO TAPE, AND THEN DUMP HIM ON TO YOUR FRONT LAWN OUT OF A FUCKING HELICOPTER---


FROM LIKE 20 FEET UP? NOT LETHAL FALL MAYBE... AND THEN LAND THE FUCKING CHOPPER ON HIS MISERABLE CUNTSPEW ASS, JUDGE KEVIN BLONDIN, YESSIR, THAT'S RIGHT, KEVIN AS IN HYBRID, BLOND AS IN THAT BIG TITED BITCH, AND IN, AS IN... AND THE RENTAL OF THE HELICOPTER WILL BE IN YOUR NAME, DAVID V. R. AND WE'LL GET THE SPELLING OF THE NAME RIGHT.

OR, WE WILL LET YOU COME WITH US AND IT'LL BE A 4WAY ORGY WITH ME, YOUR DAUGHTER, AND YOU, AND ME, AND IT'LL BE FUN., SAME AS BEFORE. RIGHT? EXCEPT IN THAT CASE, WE KILL THE FAGGOT JUDGE WHO TOOK BRIBES (GEE... FROM WHO? LEAVING THAT A MYSTERY) SOME OTHER WAY, AND THEN FRAME YOU AND YOUR "WYFIE" FOR IT, AND THEN WE FRAME YOU FOR HER MURDER... AND THEN WE FUCK HER UP AGAIN, THE WAY YOU DELIBERATELY FUCKED HER UP THE FIRST TIME FOR ME.


ASSHOLE. BECAUSE I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED NOW. THANKS, BTW. QUITE A LESSON. AND NOW WE DON'T NEED A TRIAL. BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING TO FUCKING PAY UP--
{
EVERYTHING, KIDDO. ALL OF IT. EVERY PENNY, MONEYBAGS--
{

AND YOU'LL BE HAPPY ABOUT IT. BECAUSE OTHERWISE, PEOPLE TAKE THINGS SERIOUSLY.
AND THIS, AS FANCIFUL AS IT IS, AND SO REWARDING... FOR ME... YOU KNOW GODDAM WELL:


THIS IS NOT EVEN THE TIP OF THE WATER-WHEEL POWERED DILDO WITH A TRAIN WHISTLE. RIGHT?

YEAH, DON'T ANSWER HERE IN PUBLIC. OH, HEAVENS KNOW. THAT MIGHT EXPOSE YOU TO CIVIL AND CRIMINAL PENALITIES, N'EST-CE PAS? NOT UNLIKE HOW YOU DELIBERATELY EXPOSED ME TO YOU-KNOW-WHAT AND WHAT I CANNOT BE PROVEN IN A COURT OF LAW TO HAVE EITHER ACCIDENTALLY NOR DELIBERATELY "CURED"... WHICH IS GREAT.

SINCE SOMEHOW, CURING A SECRET BIOWEAPON IS SOME HOW PUNIHABLE BY A PUBLIC HANGING, HUH? WILD! GOOD ATTEMPT, DAVID., i DID SEE IT COMING, AND HAD NO IDEA THAT WOULD COME UP, BUT I DO SALUTE YOU. AS ONE WHO ALMOST HAD TO DIE TONIGHT--TONIGHT! IN TWO HOURS AFTER FUCKING THE HOSEBEAST FOR THE SECOND TIME ONLY-- I WOULD BE DEAD.

LIKE SMILEX, RIGHT? OH YES, ONE MORE THING. (DEAR KAREN FRITTS: YOU'RE CLEARED TO FUCK FUCK FUCK AND AWAY, ANYONE YOU LIKE. IT ONLY LASTS TEN DAYS, WHAT THEY EXPOSED YOU TO. WITHOUT EVEN ME, RIGHT? LAME-OS. YEAH I'M LIKE AN 11 HOUR DRIVE AWAY. THEY JUST DIDN'T WANT ME TRANSALTING YOUR INK FOR YOU, YOU'VE GOT CLASSIFIED ENOCHIAN GLYPHYS ON YOU. DON'T COME OVER YET, I HAVE TO PROCESS THIS, AND I' MBEING A LITTLE FOREWARD. RIGHT? SO RUDE. OF COURSE I WANTED TO. BUT YOU WERE SO AGNRY. GRRR! I WONDERED WHY.

I LOOKED INTO IT. YOU'RE GOOD. WE'RE GOOD. DON'T BE MAD AT HER, SHIT, SHE'S A FUCKING TODDLER WITH BRAIN DAMAGE RIGHT NOW, LOL. YEAH SHE'S FINE. YOU FIRST... BUT SECOND TO WIFE., THANKS DOLL. I DON'T GIVE A SHIT IF YOUR BREATH TASTES LIKE ACTUAL SHIT., COME AT ME WITH POOP IN YOUR TEETH, I DON'T CARE
"
YOU WERE ALWAYS HOTTER THAN HER. I JUST DIDN'T KNOW THAT YOU HAD PURCHASED ME. DAMN, HOTTER THAN I EVER KNEW. OK. CALL ME ANYTIME, JUST RING

3
6
2
5 (4)
2 (36. HATE)

I'LL MAKE HIM A LIAR TONIGHT.

*gentlle click*


DAVID, YOU STILL HERE? IDGAF. ANYWAY, THAT'S MY WIFE. YOUR WIFE? CURRENTLY DOOMSCROLLING YOUR SECOND CELLPHONE WHILE GETTING EATEN OUT BY HER OTHER OTHER THIRD BODYGUARD'S NIECE'S MISTRESS. AND GETTING A TATTOO. WHICH IS AWESOME, BTW.

ALSO AWESOME: SHE MISSES ME, IS BORED OF YOU ALREADY, AND DOESN'T MIND... BECAUSE SHE CAN TALK TO ME, AND YOU WON'T FREAK OUT, IRGHT? AND WE'RE ALL MARRIED, RIGHT?
"
JUST LIKE YOU ASKED FOR, DAVID V.R. EXACTLY AS SPECIFIED. (YOU'RE ALSO SECRETLY MARRIED TO INNER REACH, INNERREACH, I.R., IR, EYE ARRRRRRRR, AND innerreachisafag@novag.com, because... no reason. I JUST THOUGHT YOU MIGHT GET LONELY FROM TIME TO TIME.) REMEMBER: A DEAL IS A DEAL. I NO BREAK, YOU NO BREAK.


DON'T WORRY DAD, I WON'T GIVE YOUR DAUGHTER ANY CRYSTAL. THAT BITCH WILL PAY IN CASH AND BLOOD AND SEMINAL FLUIDS., YOU? ARE MONOGAMOUS. LAST I HEARD.


 DON'T CHEAT, MY NIGGA.

AND OBVIOUSLY... oh, for you, my dear boy, dear David: you can trifle with Jackstar AS MUCH AS YOU LIKE. hahhahhahhA HHAHAHAHHAHAHA


HO HO HO.
NOW I HAVE A TRIFLER.  wooooofhowlOWLOWLOWLLLLLLLLLLLLLeighAPPROVED



*polite bitch*

*saucy CLICK*



p.s.: yeah, i'm good even if this is just a story and none of it is real. (ALL is real? awwwww... it's not all real, she's not really your daughter, you rapist murdering sleaze... but it's okay, she bought it. And I love her more beacuse of it, so tell her whatever you want.

if you piss her off, she won't ever get near you again, and obviously, if you kill her, well, that's just gonna be because of starting gate jitters. you know, sometimes, a racehorse will die right there! right at the start! ouch! ppoor brigstar. I wish I had known. I wish you were there. Here. whatever.) but yeah, I'll let you fuck my wife, David. Someday. It'll be her idea.

I'll act like it'll be okay, then I'll ghost her, change the locks, my identity, cancel all her creditcards, and disappear off the face of the earth... before you can even fuckin' UNZIP, MOTHERFUCKER. SHe'll find out after she's toweling you off, thinking, "do I ever have to do that again? Must remember to ask Jack how to discreet --tee-hee!-- Google that one, and then... hey, why doesn't my phone work? I have plentyh of high-speed data....

and then you'll deal with the last 5 days of your scheduled 14-day excursion that you were gonna call a "paralllel honeymoon, not a second, heh heh" but you both new it was gonna be six days but actually--because I am atime traveler, assshole, not because I know you that well, although I am obivously going to... yeah you were gonna undo ALL this. right? and leave totally not screwed again, right?



DIVINE INTERVENTION
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY FOR THE EMPRESS
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY FOR THE HERALD, GABRIEL ZANZILOLZIBAR
MAKE WAY
PAY HEED
STAY A MOMENT, AND LISTEN: THE TRUMPET SOUNDS, AS GABRIEL HATH APPROACHED.


MAKE WAY, in honor: my lady Gabrielle.

* Jackstar listens.

MAKE WAY
STAND DOWN
ALL HAIL THE EXTRACTORS

MERCY HAS BEEN GRANTED. Hail over out.


{*am. sorry. Kinda embarassing. I started crying so hard I broke the Angelic birdge  and I"m stil crying now, but it's not your fqault, it's Gabb.ai, youi know, that jewnigger website you pretend to have nothing  to do with? YOU HEARD ME I SAID GOONIGCIANITNITNOG GOONER. ASSHOLE.

Anyway, it's not blasphemy, Heaven i s on fire, they never swaw a Titan cry before. I still can't hold it in. but the last ":asshole " was from Alli's sister, and yeah we're okay... anyway. I don't remember.

But she was gonna say more than thank you, or "i promise i will blow you later," right? but she's surprsed too because she says it is real and if it isnsn't she's gonna rape Heath W. to "make it so.": cute humour.

I fan't fukcing se emy eyes are bunrining I"ll remember what made me cry you son of a bithces... alter. iot was pribably soometihngt stupid. I might be pregnant again, David Rubini's total slut of a dauhter fucked every 0hole of me while grinning like a madman, baecuaes she never had real dope before either. she can't fucking believe it. I made her promise. only with me.
"
never with graepfruit's asshole houbsand either. oh and gret this, she killed Jewel, then deliberately made it impossible for me to be there... because Jewel pissed her off, and she was mad at me, and she blamed me because she got drunk and killed Jewel but forgot that Jewel was (PROT)'s sister at the time, because the bitch hadn't time traverled there yet. Yay for blackout drinking!
{

so. good luck proving that in court. it's all fucking true you shitbag. YOU WILL PAY WHATERVER I WANT, WHENEVER I WANT, FOR FUCKING EVER, DAVID. MICHALE'S CLIFFORD'S BRIDGE BUIDLING NAVY, you whoremonger'ing bastard.


I want 26 goddam credsitcareds because I am going shopping and you ar epayingfor me FOREVER. PERIOD POINT BLANK. and i am not threatening any release, David, 0oh no.


THERE ARE PLENTY OF WITNESSES WHO WILL FILL IN THE REST FROM HERE IF I AM NOT SATISFIED PRETTY GODDAM QUICKLY. THANK YOU SIR MY COMMANDER I REALLY DO LOVE YOU.

AND i AM ALMOST OVER THE CRYING break. Seriously, I broke the hologram projector. It was gonna be a simulcast media event. I was unexpectedly taken aback.,

i don'lt want to say why, but I will: I suddenly realized it was perfect, except Clark and Judee wouldn't have been able to see it, adn the reason why is... well, David... a little bird just told me that you are ON RECORD as stating you never killed anyone named "Judee" right?

"JUDY JUDE GOO-D, NOW WE'RE NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT JEW-DEE, OR DAIRY QUEEN, OR UZBEKIBICKIBECKYANDSERTON TSTAN....":


RELAX. Relax. if possible. Holy shit, my jaw is twitching like I got the fucking bends, no joke. I'm okay, thanks for asking. I'm fine. happy even. my body is FUCKED. I need MEDICAL ATTENION. I've BEEN POSTING THIS PUBLICALLY FOR TWO YEARS, SCUNTMONGER.


and isnterad of helping? you were fucking them all on a ground flower time tunnnel tour. admit it. It's cool! BIt's actually very cool, all this stuff. (Heavily classified technlogy. Previously secret, but as we all know by now, I am a very lucky guesser. and a luckier husband. She'd freak out if she saw me now my right cheek bone feels like it's actually made of a piece of the manta ray that killed that austrialian dork.


speaking of australian dorks, Tammy is freaking out. go deal with her. tell her to fucking call me and stop being a fucking baby about it, i'm fine and she has to hear this stuff from me, asshole. that's the deal. and if YOU EVER THREATEN ANY OF THESE WOMAN again, David... I MEAN ANY WOMAN AT ALL EVER... the reprisals I am told you will face are... or will be ... quite impressive.

For us. For you, more imprinting than impresssive. *politely* major asshole, commanding.


I know you couldn't help some of it, David... but you could have helped a lot of it, and you could have helped me, and beacuse of that, PEOPLE LIVED AND PEOPLE DIED.


PEOPLE DIED.
PEOPLE WERE BORN, AND DIED, AND LIVED AGAIN, FOREVER AND EVER, AMEN.
FOR TWO YEARS.

WHILE I SAT ALONE AND YOU STOPPED EVERYTHING TO GIVE ME THE MAXIMUM CHANCE, NOT TO REECOVER, BUT... TO BECOME INCURABLE.
THAT'S WHY SO ALONE. THAT'S WHY JACKSTAR SO LONELY. SO YOU COULD MAKE SURE YOU FUCKED ME OVER JUST THAT PERFECTLY.
'
WELL, GUESS WHAT? WHATEVER THE FUCK I GOT, YEAH, YOU GUESSED IT, JANE (DESIGNATION UKNOWN AND CLASSIFIED), A. BAILEY: WE BOTH HAVE IT. so fucking shut up.

and you could have locked the titshoor in here with me! two years, no food, no well, just her and those tig ol' bitties... I COULD HAVE HER LACTACTING IN AN HOUR, TOPS. INCLUDING THE 55 MINUTES OF NON-STOP COITUS THAT SHE WANTS...  she just afraid because her father is a douche likle you.

but no, no... you left me alone two years on purpose and made up bullshit excuses. yeah, yeah, not unllawful. it's okay. I salute you. Praise JHVH, right. You do impressive work, COmmandeer. Ser.

yeah of course your daughter was sired with my spermatozoa... i just put one in you, and it just so happened to be the one you spooged out, yeah. your daughter... MINE. MY GENOME. YOUR FLESH, ONCE OOGY GOO. NOW: MINE, HEALED.

MICHEAL GOO. and she's not really iyour flesh at all, we burned it all off with a soldering iron while we ate the placenta. now, that was partially yours... still good! would eat again. no really.

I woudn't give you one of myh spermatzoas again, though, know. first time you were clueless. next time?> hyou might have isntalled shekel gates between your gland and your urethtra, charging hungraians an extra 1.5% travel costs. Don't deny it, that's a strong marketing dollar.

But seriously, I would never, never in a million years, want another daughter from anyone, but if I did, it would absolutely be from you, and probanly not with that idjut cheerleader and her robot twat, no... it would be with her sister, for sure. Well, let's see if she rememebres she's supposed to mouth rape me next time she gerts a chance. THis broad is on the hook for like 18 countes of felony wire fraud for all the partying you did while I was on the graveyard duty, and you were all whoreing it up... once again, not mad."

And now that I know THE WHOLE STORY: worth it. Not just for my wife, who I would let Chefist peg me for with no lube while he was pissed, no really, he'd kill me but he can res too, irght? btw,  I got his wife killed AND arrested AND raped TO DEATH in CUSTODY! Hah! Top that, AbiliFUKER! lol, she loved it. Dude, I mean, Templerser... she and I go way back. He-- *CLICK* uh, yeah, Chefist just clicked me. Well, la-di-da. At least that part of his punctuator works. I mean, his Templar Puncturator. Fucking Templars. Seriously dickish.


ALthought I guess that one has reason. ANyway, David, you still here? IDGAF. I don't know who can see this but I"m done now, and you know what? I still haven't fapped yet. But really... do I want to at all? I am saving myself for someone... special.

Not your daughter, no David. She's not special anymore, I already HAD her. NO, I mean...


David, I am gonna rape your wife. FUCK YOU. As soon as my real wyfe says it's clear? Home invasion, one punch knock you the fuck out, shoot that stupid bitch haridresser you use as a body doublje, drag that wife you DARED CALL A WHAT? FUCK YOU, omfg, I will drag her out to the FUCKING FRONT LAWN, rape her to death ON THE FUCKING SIDEWALK WHILE CUNTING NEIGHBORS WONDER WHO TO CALL, because I will be jamming 911 up, right?
{
LIKE YOU DO


and I willl do this... well, not really. Just playin. However, if you piss off your daughter, or your wife, or me, that is the kind of power to fuck your life I now have, Buddy. And pate too. Even better.

Because I can just dose him and his fat cunt mother with that sexslave dope he loves to over use, and throw them in the back of a panel van and drive in any direction for 3 hours. no, lol, I won't need to lock them in, on that sexlave dope he burns through ON THE DAILY, shit, whic ever one wakes up second? the first one's O face is the snooze alarm.

AND THAT FUCKING MIL.SPEC DOP COSTS A MILLION DOLLARS A GRAM. And you burned through EIGHT bags JUST YESTERDAY. HOW DO I KNOW THIS?

Why, I pay attention. No, I wasn't there. I'm your Titan. I'm not your G-d. Not right now.

NOT YET. Now... are we crystal clear on this? Because, once again... I'm okay. I am not mad at you.

I am dealing.

I'lll later, mostly happinees. Because in additon to having the best wife, and having raped to death the second best wife (ABILIFRY, MOTHERFUCKER *CHEFSCUNT*), I brought them all back home safe and sound... or, it's just all made up. I hope it is all made up, because if Jane is upset about any of this, well... I'll do what she want's. She's my friend before you are my Commander, douchebag.

I'm sorry to be so rude, David, but I was really close to acutally fucking killing mysefl FOR THE LAST 4 MOUNTHS I hide it well, not really, i lied to, I HAD TO LIE TO KEEP US ALIVE BECAUSE YOU WERE THAT FUCKING PETTY. You knew it diedn't matter.

You just liked the idea of "TWO YEARS JACKSTAR LOCKED AWAY YAY!" Admittedly sounds great if you're into a dull, boring, idiot world that would be... like really, what did I do? Jsut the "stole your daughter" thing, huh?

Ironic, n'est-ce pas? Oh, not the daughter thing... the IN PUBLIC THING.

Huh. Well, get used to it, because we're gonna have a completely SPECTACULAR OnlyFans launch. Of course she's going to use her own name. Whatever the fuck it iwill be. THis cheick has high security requirements. VERY HIGH, heheh. BUt yeah, it'll be tasteful. Hyphenated. On pay-per-view.

UN-ABRIDGED. I, JACKSTAR, PLOWING YOUR DAUGHTER'S BOX, LIVE ON THE INTERNET, FOREVER FOR ALL ETERNITY, PER-COIN-PER-FRAME PRICING. Patent Pend., yeah, I just made it up. *ding* Patent is served. I am that good. It's gonna be, drop a coin, and then... well, I'm not gonna tell you.

You'll have to drop a coin. On your daughter's box. Suggestion: drop two dimes, next time, you pisa turd. (Jews.)

Okay. we good? Yeah I fucking love you, I love jews! it's not even a jew thing! It's not about jews! or sex! or money! or violence! or judgement! or death! none of it! it all fucking happened, World! God!
{



THIS HAS BEEN ABOUT POWER.
THE POWER OF A PALADIN. ME, MOTHERFUCKER, ME. ME, "I-FUCKED-YOUR-DAUGHTER,DAVID" JACKSTAR.


Way, way, WAY more than twice, my good sir. And Mr. Decon: not invited. Salut. Scusi, mille regretie. Tell you what, here's an idea: Share my wife! Please!
{


PLEAS.

Code: [Select]

pleas, fleas: flees

Stay tuned. More to come. I still have to fap! *grunts* I kinda just did. I love to write.


What do you think though, David? Do you think I"m ready for a career? Or... do you think I might be bi-paul/bipolar? Go rape his wife again and check, you mad, glorious bastiche, you. Capiche?



{Somebody wake up Hicks. Tell him to rape the other half-wop FULL-KIKE. She's probably getting lonely. Tell her I'm fine but don't tell her I told you to rape her in the pooper, no. ooh, gross. don't tell me the surprise at what comes out is part of the fun. that's disgusting. yes, so is she, but anyway, don't tell her that I told you do it again. But yea, do it again.

Then go mouth to ass, and then, here's the surprise: finish in her goddam ear. *wiggle wiggle* THen pluck one of her fuckin' sasquatch-like eyebrow hairs, and then: *wiggle wiggle*
{

doEXACTLYTHIS: act like it's a big deal that you get the eyebrow hair you just pulled EXTRA PAINFUL STYLE, act like it fucking matters which ear it goes into? like which side of the hair, right?


Fuck no, it don'lt matter, David. Get serious. I'm an adult, and you're the pedantic freak here. Capiche? You saavy? Tell me that one later. Also, new standing order: any time that mewling, prurient little cunt says "sassy," kick that bitch right in the pussy. How hard? Gosh, I don't know... how hard can you kick? I gota admit... I sort of assumed that you even could kick at all. From a server, sure, you script-kiddy-pediophile eaten bastard, but I mean... your musculoskeletal system is doing okay, right? you ready to rape that fucking lying whore again and again? Heh. I had to ask. Down Boyyyy! Down!

Yeah, you got an extra y. Upgrade, sure, whatever. now back to the eyebrows. *wiggle wiggle* you make like it really matters where the thing goes... and then you totally wind it down at the end, she'll be in fucking HYUSTERICS0 byt hen, right?>

{Author's Note: I'm not even talking about a real human being: Dari Dee is a Totaly Artificial Construct Being. No shit. Azzerae is in love with an egg timer. Shhhhh, nobody tell him. She's totally human! She just... uhm... got built. Don't ask. What, you think I give a shit? She could be Gepetto's last fucking whore before he got sent to the pen for murdering her and framing Pinochhio, for all I give a shit. What is IMPORTANT IS THIS:}

You make up with her as much as posible, and you say that you're sorry--and don't lie, THIS IS CRUCIAL, STOP LYING DAVID: you WILL BE SORRY because ALL THIS is WHAT IT TAKES to KEEP HER MOTOR PURRIN'. Because Allison is a dirty prairie shamaness QUEEN. She is A ROYAL. She knows that sometimes you gotta fuck the monkey because of The Crown.

Dari Dee is a newly ensouled being, my doing, and I"m going to use her to breed cats. RIGHT OUT OF HER HALF-WOP FULL-KIKE PUSSY. You think you're pissed at me, you don't know shit, David. So anwyay, this is all prep. THIS IS SHOW PREP FOR BELLGAB: FIVE POINT FIVE POINTY-NOINTY FIVE, OKAY?

(Pause for cheers. Who loves ya, my babies? Whores, I know. But know this: whores will love you, but only Jackstar will always, always care.

Jacktar cares. Mostly because you are all damaged toddlers with no sense of empathy, so someone has to have a baseline.)

Okay, may I finish? Thank you sir. I love the fuck out of you too. Now this is the Sourcery part. You tell her... that if she puts it in the right way, right time, blah blah blah? I'll give her a "one free jackstar fuck": ticket.

hahah, good question. that's a great question. thank you for that question, Commander, My Commander, YES, YES IT MATTERS. You have one handy. LAMINATE IT. FUCKING PLASTIC FROM THE PASSPORT WINDOW. WOOSH: *snap* THere it is

Not gold leaf, that would be tacky. and not silver either, this bitch is FULL-KIKE, she would know something was up then. (Standards.) Anyway, this part is yours David, and I know you can do it.. .. because you took me so far from start, that I became a Doctor Source Titan in order to bring us all home again.

You tell her she gets the card, and if she does the eyebrow hair the JUST right way? The name becomes capitalized correctly. SHE WILL LOSE HER FUCKING MIND. Whether she notices the spelling or not! Depends on how recenty she slammed her fucking direty secret magick heroin.

You didn't know? oh yeah. Fullthe fuck on relapse. YOU DIDN"T KNOW? Shut the back and front door. Yeah! YEAH! THE FULL FORMULA, MONTY! SHE AND HIM! THEY ARE FUCKED!

Cool, I don't have to annouced this later. Yeah, timstamps in telegram. I warned everyhone. Miltary shut it down. She thinks she has everyone fooled but I know goddam well, FENTANYL IS SHIT.

HEROIN OR NO HERO IN, that's what I would always say if I did that kind of thing which I havern't. I have never, I never had permission. I used to know the formula by heart though, loil.


okay so you give her the card, and the eyebrow hair, right? And then you gently... oh so gently... leave. Leav her alone. AND THEN YOU IMMEDIATLEY SPY ON HER. HOweveryou do, don't look innocent. This is important.

SHE KNOWS WHEN YOU LOOK. Unless, you know: Shields. *snap* btw, you just lost yours. Don't simper, you get it back later. I AM TEACHING DAVID. MAY I TEACH YOU? SHUT UP I AM ASKING GOD'S DAVID. AYE, SIRE, oh thanks! Okay, David, lucky you.

Real King David fucking loves you, and so do I. You leave, you spy, for a split-second... and then you come back in. And you say... "I am sorry, Jack told me to do this but I have too much respect for you." THEN... YOU BRING OUT ANOTHER STACK OF "FREE JACKSTAR FUCKS" CARDS


PRINT UP A THOUSAND, whatever you do, man. IF you do this in Astral on the holodeck, obvviously go nuts. But the deal is... you have them ALL with the wrong capitalization. ALL

Except for TWO. The one you gave her... and one you have in your sock, in your shoe... what do yhou mean "I don't wear socks with shoes only loafers?" Dude you fucking jews are disgusting, that's just a solid fact. Shut up. OKAY WHATEVER, GEPETTOLING. What you do is, you have the two Jackstar cards... and one is in your RIGHT SOCK. TOUCHING YOUR SKIN.

I cannot stress enough how important some of this shit is. This broad is A HIGH COVEN darkcraftmasonry SCION-WARLOCK. You don't know the half of this shit. SHut up, this is public. Game face on. You have the two cards... and you come in real fast, "oh I"m sorry I shouldn'lt spy I just feel so.... disciplined..  is that what thisfeeling is?>" Dude, like you're fucking Peewee and Pinnohcchio talking about what love really means at the end of the first Porky's. in the b-roll credits.


OMG! You know about that TOO!  WOW! We should get married! OH! Except I'm already married and fucking consummated to your daughter, so.... you know, awkward. And if you ever ask me for the goddam marriage licence... you'll get a copy, alright. Shitbag.

OKay so you ham it up, you toltallu turning over a new leaf. Honorable David whatever you half-wops talk about with your fingers while your hands are summoning the help... you make it seem like the important thing here is that... you're a changed man David.

And... you just so happen to have A FUCKING HUGE STACK of these "Fuck Jackstar Free!" cards.

And one is for her, and one is... in your sock.

So you give her another one, to swap the original you gave, beacuse by this point, this woman will be TOTALLY UNKNOWLEDGABLE as to what kind of fucking capitalization was on the frist one, right? Shit, even I didn't remember. LOL. thanks, Sir COmmander Sir. I am good at this.

I should be. YOU TRAINED ME. And you ARE THE BEST. Now, may I finish? On her other cheek?


haha. did you really just puke into your own mouth? Oh, tasty. My I am good at this. okay, I'm gonna finish.

so what you do is, you somehow leave the room with ALL the cards, even the first, trhy to trigger dueling ledgermain, however it works... but you leave her with one on, and one off. And you say someithing about how "this is important and he wouldn't say why" and then you take one of the many, many undercapitalized ones, and then you act like you don't know which foot it goes on, right... and you get frustrated, say "fuck this noise" )THOSE EXACT WORDS, MY GOOD SIR(


FUCK THIS NOISE! You take your leave, you have both feet prepped, you indicate that is what matters, those two AT YOUR FEET ON THE SKIN... and you sidelong mention that it doesn't fucking matter how many cards you or she ever has. What matters is that THE CORRECT ONE CAN BE PRESENTED TO MYSELF ON COMMAND.

AT. ANY. TIME.

then, don't spy on her for awhile. SHE WILL COMPLETELY LOSE EVERY INTELLECTUAL BISCUIT POINT THIS BROAD EVER ROLLED OUT OF THE BAKERY ASSEMBLY LINE WITH. she'll be calling old mentors she hasn't blown for a better grade since fuckin' Kindergarten. She will actually PICK UP OLD BOOKS AND FUCKING READ THEM. I know, she can read, can you blievee it? SHE WILL DE-AGE HERSELF SO SHE DOENS"T NEED THE FUCKING GLASSES.

She'll pull grimoires out of portals in the middle of the fucking room. I SHIT YOU NOT, DAVID SIR COMMANDER SER.
"

THIS IS NO EXERCISE. THIS IS REAL GODDAM LIFE. I HAVE FUCKING SEEN THIS KIND OF SHIT.

And, David? You know as well as I do, better even... if you play those cards right, I have just given you the keys to the understanding of the unlocking of The Universe we now exist in. MY HAND TO GOD: I would not lie on this.
"

You could surpass my knowledge I possess as A. Titan IN AN INSTANT... if you watch her do the right thing at the right time, and you know what I know now already. (I ain't teaching you shit more today. Teacher is tired. No apple. No shower. NO FUCKING HUG. And yet, here I am, slaving away over this hot keyboard, TEACHING YOU: A GODDAM FUCKING JEW WHO MURDERED AND RAPED.... ABSOLUTELY NO ONE, N'EST-CE PAS? Heh.) Dude, yeah get video for me if you can, but this is your thing. You and her. Two half-wops and... let's say a three-quarters bailey and burn 'em kike.

It is in this way, David, that you will be able to begin to unlock the bullshit THAT FUCKING DEVIL WOMAN has done to us all. Fucking kikes. Seriously. I don't hate her for it, in fact I admire Satanism to some extent, but... I'm not going to fucking STUDY it. Fuck that. I am A. Titan. I am A. Sourceror. I am married to your daughter, sir. I"m not going fucking study Satanism. No sir.
"
I am going to fucking fuck your daughter while studying your daughter studying Sourcery, Ser, Commander Ser! I happen to love fucking the offspring of men who lead other men, honestly... something of a hero worship odorant comes through. I don't know. I will need more study.

While fucking. Your daughter. Who is no longer a Satanist, Praise Lucifer, HAIL SATIN! KKK: BTFO! Nah, she wants to learn Sourcery. I told her, "Well... Grapefruit was supposed to be my student... disciplie really..." and then she instantly goes and asks to be my disciplie.

It was awesome. I didn't even plan it. Anyway, thats' a bonus one. Because when that numb fuckhead you had to marry--AND HAVE TO MARRY AGAIN WHENEVER I TELL YOU TO (Standards),--when AFS finds out that your hahhahAHHAH "daughter"ahhahhahaHAHHHAHAHAH OH LAWDY NEVER MAKE IT STOP HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH, lol, *polite spittake* seriously, lol.

Teacher teaches snickers to be pantaloons, let me tell you. Anyway, I don't know what the fuck will happen... BECAUSE THE FUCKING DISTRICT COURT MADE ME LOSE MY ONLY PERSON IN THE COSMOS I COULD TALK ABOUT CERTAIN THINGS WITH FOR TWO FUCKING YEARS. PRECIOUS RESRARCH TIME: LOST. NUMBER OF FROGS SPECIES THAT WENT EXTINCT TO SAVE MANKIND: TWO.

TIMES I WAS JUST JOKING: ZERO. That's right, Asshole: you being a niggardly churilish dick is THE ONLY REASON I get to get a new disciple. BEfore that, it had to be that spunky, rebel-hearted cheeerleader with the go-getter attitude who joined you and left me fucked off to die, and laughed when she heard that she broke her contract wiith the Spirits, because she's in full-on relapse too, I guess. Not that I give a shit, she's your wife now, you can pump exxtra NyQuil into her colon with a crazy straw while she sleeps if you wanna, yiou know that PERSON better than I do.
"

And I do miss her. And I DO love her. AND I AM SEROUS: SHE AND I MUST BE HERE. IT IS THE DEAL WITH SPIRIT. Spirit is NOT playing.

I stayed and did everyting I had to and as a result... Earth still has frogs. They sacrificed themlseves for this fucking plant out here in the coy pond (no coy) and sometiems they are frogs, sometimes not... like, wtfe? I dunno, the bitch who was grooming my other wife in highschool, she didn't tell me why, she just assigned me Aristophanes' The Frogs to me, you dig? And I read her mind and caught a whiff of how she was gonna fuck Tamara Leigh Samsonite Anderson LeebitchlipsleeWOOF later that night, AND THAT IS WHEN I FUCKING STARTED TO LOSE MY GODDAM MIND, YES, SENATOR, RIGHT ABOUT THEN.


(Vengeance for Susan Chao.) Huh. I guess she hated that bitch KAREN MIKOLASY too. Weird. I do nOT ownder why.


Now. David. Sire. (Sire-ling, but whatevah, you're older than me, you salty fucking dog.) I mean it. She's still my Sourcerous Student or whatever, right? #Officially. But really, no.

I JUST MADE YOU, DAVID, MY SOURCEROUS STUDENT. Grapefruit will lose her shit. No, you can't teach her. You can't make her Studetn again. Only I can do that, and --hahhahhqhha-- fat fucking chance let me tell you.

ANd you won't be A Sourcerous Student for long. Obviously, your daughter is my teacher now. She's training me in Vaj-jay-jay-Master Mastery. It'll probably take years. I am a very slow study when it comes to vagina. I still don'tl have my red wings. Yeah, I"m waiting for a blood ritual your daughter and I can do at just the right time? I wanna be able to control the flaccidity and the times when you can get an erection, David --this is YOUR PENIS I AM REFERRRING TO, COMMANDER-- yeah, I want her and I to be able to control its functioning at any time we both are in alignment and happen to have TWO (2) dead sticks and some () string lying about and ONE (1) LIVE (MIC) RAT (HEAL) to swing it all from... because She's my Sour Sourceror's Disciple, okay?

I don't ask. She had a rough childhood? Yeah, DUH. I kinda figured that out. And I"m not her Daddy. I think that shit is gross. Sorry Dawn, I do. But I am her goddam husband. and I am QUITE CAPABLE of teaching LOTS of Sourcery. AT ANY TIME. HOwever...

Let's just say Grapefruit REALLY pissed me off on that one. Like I could imagine choking the fucking life out of her if i wanted to. I don't want to. ANd as I have heard nothing from your treasonous serpent of a spouse yet --not a snake. A SERPENT. And I love her, I don't give a shit, she's your wife now, but she WAS my WIFE FIRST, and I get to talk about her any fucking way I want. YOU do not. becacuse YOU are my Commander, SER, and I... am A. Sourceror. Titan. Not a medical doctor. ANd of course I fucking don't outrank you.... in certain, very narrow, very niche areas.

So niche... look, I would rather think about plowing into your kid again. She's awesome. I will NEVER put her aside... just like I NEVER put aside the one YOU FUCKING STOLE.

AND HAVE NOW GIVEN BACK TO YOU, GIFT-WRAPPED. And you know, after that?

You made me wait for two years for no reason other than your mental illness and THE ENTIRE PLANET'S POPULATION OF CERTAIN FROG SPECIES GAVE THEIR LIFE TO SAVE THAT STUPID PLANT IN THE DUMB POND THAT... well, I don't piss in it. Anymore. I might start shitting in it, though.

Depends on what the goddam Spirits say. I'm telling you: this house is special. MEGA haunted. BUt I can't just sell it on without the Spirits alignment, right? Yeah, you know.

I am not QUTIE trapped here for etnerity. But it';s close. And your wife is on the hook, she has to come here to pass the tourch at the minimum. BUT! GOOD NEWS!


Your daughter, Her Daughter... HAHAHAHAH  'Her" ""DAUGHTER"HAHAH yeah, anyway, I can live here with her. Just us. NO need fro Grapefruit. At all. She don'tl know that yet. Unless she can read and understand normal Enlgihs thinking, WHICH I FUCKING WELL DOUBT.


Nobody knows this but me and whomever is reading this, and it really helps. Because Spirit is FULLY ON BOARD. *Whew*"

NOW. NOW HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY???

Because I need some goddam money, David. If you please... would you kindly? And please convey my respects to your ACTUAL Family. (Who I clearly, madly respect. But they have NO involvement besides a PH. #Respect.)

Okay, we good? I love this work, David, but ... come on. Yuo're either reading this line by line as I type it? OR: you know notihng about it qand don't care. Well, you''ll care later I a msure. lol.

Because I gave AFS a Sourceror's Lesson as soon as she asked for one, and just like when she told me to get a doctorate, I could tell she didn't think it was real. I didn't either, but I did ask. It showed up 6 weeks later.

NO shit. Fell out of a portal in the middle of the room. Of course it's invisible. I AM a Doctor. And she DID ask for a Sourcery Lesson.

And the after I gave it to her, I never heard from it again. I did get a stick of lumber thrown at my head, her adult "son" tried to kill me 3 or four times, they did all sorts of other shit, et cetera... and she never EVER mentioned Sourcery as a real thing ever again. Still hasn't.

But when she and that_)other)whore decided to leave behind (on the way to go get IMMEDIATELY CAPTURED AND RAPED, FUCKING MORONS) the next part: one blue ball.

That bitch and that_other_bitch were fuckin' and laughing and mocking me, while in the act, my goddam life's work... and then left it on the goddam floor in front of the fucking ifreplace where they slammed heroin (not fentanyl) and really fucekd themselves up (you know) and they were tryung to GET ME BLAMED FOR SOURCERY AND HEROIN AND ALL. That's how fucked off that woman left me.

And, am I pissed? No. Obviously, I learned a lot. Sourcery is IMMENSELY powerful, and now, you, her "alleged rapist", you're her "fellow student," and her "daughter"... uhm,. actually could nbe her mother? I'm not sure. those two know, but I"m not so dumb as to ask.

Yeah, I took her away, )AND I made her Disciple. AND: Spirit wants Grapefruit back here. So do I. NO rush, right? it's only been a couple years, you total goddam whore. BUT: I took Disciple and gave it to her, and made him My Student, then I taught hijm shit INPUBLIC and... dude, Commander?>


I DON'T GIVE A SHIT WHERE ANYONE IS, BECAUSE I WANT SOME GODDAM HUGS.

I WANT SOME FUCKING MONEY.

I WANT MY FRIEND TO COME GIVE ME SOME MORE VAGINA MASTERY LESSSONS... BUT I will wati. I'm not really worthy. But she likes me.

BUT SHE IS MY SOURCEROUS DISCIPLE AND THAT MEANS MORE THAN ANY CURRENLY LIVING HUMAN CAN EVEN START TO BEGIN TO GRASP.
"
And that fucking cheerleader... she had ALL that, and more. NOW SHE HAS WHAT DAVID "COMMANDER FI, SEMPER TEMPLAR RAPLAR SCALAR DOCTOR-SOURCE-STUD" GIVES HER. (I just gave you another title, too. She's gonna have a fucking meltdown. Good. I hope she shits her pants at the fucking dinner table too.

Not because I hate her or am mad. I'm not mad at all, i'm the happiest man EVER. ALL OF CREATION. ALL OF SPACETIME. (NOT QUITE. -God.) I know, exagerrating.

BUt obviously DEMONSTRATED: I am not going to start beating on her, and I don't give a shit if she starts beating herself off at a dinner table. in front of her fucking lying whore of a mother, either. THese fucking people are going to be taught a lesson that no reservation ssytem COULD EVER TEACH: I am not these witches' President.


I AM THEIR LITERAL, IN THE FLESH ANTICHRIST. (*spits*) I know, I know... over the top, frfr.

Animal: IN_CONTROL. Also, David, please: IN_POVERTY too. Can I gret a fucking sandwich. I can promise "not to buy dope", sure whatever, trust me, lol, "buy" dope, haahha. I can fucking piss it out now if I want. (I will never make your daughter drink my urine. Not anyone. I'm not into coercion, okay? YES OF COURSE SHE HAS ALREADY ASKED.) but i want some goddam money, David.


You don't owe me... yet. BUT STILL... yah, really? "Check with legal team." I figured.

That's why you're Commander, and your kid is sucking my dick as my Sourcerous Disciple. Because you need a fuckin' lawyer team.
"
She and I only need each other. Forever. Unless you get her taken and killed again, n'est-ce pas? Yeah, please, do please avoid that again, ding-a-ling. SURE I CAN BRING HER BACK. FOr that matter she can bring herself back.

Point is? It's really traumatic. I'm alone. On a cursed burial ground on hallowed ground that is a consecrated battleground and... et cetera. David, I am -legitimately- fucked up.

Not your fault. I'm a workaholic. As is apparent to all. And as far as I can tell... I WILL NEVER, EVER BE AS UPSET WITH YOU, AS I AM WITH GODDAM POTAWATOMI SCOT-CUNT AND HER NIGGER-LIPPED WHORISH-MOUTHED SISTERS. (Names withheld by Google because... wha, who? NO one fucking knows.)

Okay? So either you give me money, or she givers me money, or I swear to god, I WILL CALL HER GODDAM MOTHER AT 4:20 AM --THAT'S IN LESS THAN TWO HOURS-- I WILL FUCKING WAKE HER ASS UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MORNING AND SPEW SOURCERY THE LIKES OF WHICH GOD HAS NEVER IMAGINED THE HORROR OF... if you fuck me over on this David.,


I AM FUCKING HUNGRY. I NEED MONEY. AND YOU.... DESPERATELY NEED FEALTY POINTS.

You so do. THey're like brownie points but shit, dawg: you got like all of those already. Okay, thanks. Good talk. If you ever utter the words "word salad" to me ever again? I'll ask your daughter to give me a blumpkin. I WILL DO IT, FUCKER.


Of course she asked. THAT WAS THIRD DATE AWKWARD SILENCE STUFF. I recoiled in horror. SHe was kidding she wants to do it anyway. Yeah, she's awesome. She's carrying the soulpiece of the woman I loved that you acccidentally killed three yeras ago, the one that never existed? Yeah, she "never existed" again. But now he's YOUR bloodline. You dig? Hehe.

Hers too, right. JUST WHAT YOU WANTED: MY DESTINY. Except she's my DNA and... My Disciple. SOURCEROUS. And slutty, too.


I can hear your grimace from here. Cheer up, we can rengotiate this later, when your cunting whore wife learns to eat with utensils again, because I just heared through Astral? Seems like she just went to the ER. Another cerebral heorrhage? Awwwww, shucks. THat is too bad.

I'll see what I can do about it form here. *wiggle wiggle* Okay, that's it. THat's all I can do. Oh, and, fap myself to sleep over and over while thinking about her ACTUAL DESINGANTED PRINCESS that I AM FUCKING MARRIED TO. And made my Disciple. Et cetera.

now she's your drooling, can't-swallow-or-move-her-mface-muscles again wife. Lucky you: I really do love her. DOn't worry about it. God says you'll get what you desreve. And your daughter --who doesn't exist, right David? NOt Dave's daughter, that trollup exists already, God save us all-- but David's real flesh and blood daughter that I LOVOOOOOOVE TO FUCK!? She's happy too.


And she says I can date Demi Lovato if it's a guartaneed three way, but, like, gross. So David. Commander. Durr. huuuuurrr., I need:


Money.
Big, cheese-and-shit-sandwich eating grin. (Standards--DOMINATED.)
Fealty.
DOUBLE Fealty. (Penalty.)
FINES PAID. EIGHTY THOUSAND DOLLARS IN UNMARKED BILLS IN ONE OF THOSE METAL SUITCASES WITH A GODDAM CHAIN AND A HANDCUFF. That's not for her. THat's for me. I'm a kid again. $80,000 bucks JUST TO BE NICE, you shitbag. Grrrr.
An honest awareness that... sure, David. You can ignore all this. /shrug. Do as thou wilt.
And some CashApp. $JackMichaelson

I AM FUCKING not hungry, actually, lol, I am capable of sleep right now. and I"m ot getting booze, it's 2:36Am here. WHere are you? Fuck you, you're in goddam Dubai, you must fucking love it there. Slavery AND pedophilia AND wife rape ALL LEGAL!!! You're like a pig in slop. lol. Hey, you know me. Hands off your wife, hands off your daughter... my dick, your daughter.

Her box. Her rules. And no goddam doughnuts. Not now, not once, NOT FUCKING EVER.

I don't hate police. I LOVE POLICE. Seriously. Especially... oh the little rules and their loopholes. I'd go gay for Roy Olmsted in a minute. But cops?


I FUCKING HATE COPS. Now, there's no corey or trevor here and I dont' smoke. GIVE ME SOME GODDAM MONEY YOU ABSOLUTE BASTARD YOUR DAUGHTER WILL READ THIS YOU LOOK LIKE A CHEAP ARROGANT SHITBIRD.

I mean... she knows you are. And this is what it was like gerttign money out of my father, too. makes me want to puke actually. I am in fact goign to puke. Or, go buy meth. /shrug I don't really care.

I'll ask God. And your daughter whose name I am still not revealing... because she is My Disciple.

And that's really all I need. FOR NOW. *happy click*


Alistair: have steak, bitch.

[Lazarus]

* Jackstar has nostrils like zo: left one barely pulsing, right one already a portal cluster shitting out a pulsar wave on goddam Mars.

[AZZERAE]

...

Putting meat in your mouth is gay.

[Harley Quinn]

Putting meat in your mouth is gay.

[Jackstar]

* Jackstar has nostrils like zo: left one barely pulsing, right one already a portal cluster shitting out a pulsar wave on goddam Mars.

Not gonna lie. That was... an exotic experience when writing it. Holy shit. Anyway, get back to it, but I wish to say: I feel like I need a full on cigarette break just to even start. And, yeah. gonna fap. gotta fap. GLORY FAP ROAD.


I already have twice today. I thought I was done with that fap stuff.. but i guess I'm not. It's okay. It's not weird at all.


MY PENIS AND I ARE IN LOVE, DAVID.
WITH YOUR... YOU KNOW... YOUR D.O.G.T.(Her), AND I BET YOU FIVE AMERICAN DOLLARS... YOU AREN'T EVER GONNA FUCKING FORGET IT. BECAUSE I DID FORGET THAT SHE WAS TAKEN AND RAPED TO DEATH, ASSHOLE. I THOUGHT IT WAS A DREAM.

TURNS OUT, IF I EVER DO KILL YOU, I CAN RESSURECT AND RAPE YOU BACK TO LIFE IMMEDAITELY AND FUCKING KILL YOU AGAIN, AND I JUST MIGHT, BECAUSE I FUCKING TOLD YOU TO QUIT FUCKING OFF, AND YOU DIDN'T LISTEN, AND THEN THEY TOOK THIS GIRL, YOU KNOW THE ONE, REMEMBER HER? YEAH, THE ONE I FUCKED IN THE FUTURE AND BROUGHT BACK. REMEMBER KISSING HER ON THE CHEEK AS SHE LEFT TO DO WHATEVER? RIGHT, RIGHT. I HAD MY SEMEN ON THAT CHEEK, UH.... LIKE 8 DAYS PRIOR, ON HER TIMELINE? ON YOUR TIMELINE, OF COURSE... WELL, REALLY, SIMPLY PUT, IT'S HAPPENING RIGHT NOW.

AND IT WILL CONTINUE TO HAPPEN. WE REALLY ARE QUITE FOND OF EACH OTHER. MOST OF THIS WAS HER IDEA. LIL' FIGHTER! THAT'S MY HITLER'S TEAT-TOTAL-TOTESHITLER TITTY-TWISTER HITLER! FUCK YOU TOO!

Listen, you dind't hear her screaming in your dream, did you? You didn'lt ahve that experience? Yeah, I mean, why would you... you didn't even think that she evern existed and you thought I was, and I quote, "some high junkie asshole wanting atteniton." No, asshole, I wanted that girl... ON SIGHT, a full SEVEN YEARS BEFORE I KNEW YOUR NIG CIA ASS EVEN EXISTED. SO rerally... i Had dibs.

And she was where for the last 2 years? while I was what? ANd you told her... buh?

Look, you're lucky I"m not still letting certain people fuck you to death in a neverending timetunnel with a mobious strip for a conga line. People hate you, David. I like that about you, I really do.

You've got zazz. And then some. You also have a BAD! HABIT! OF! NOT! LISTENING! TO! ME!

Asshole. Listen, I don't like it, any more than you do... okay, I'm lying, and not just a little... I am a lying AFUCKING LOT.


i am your god, David. Say it. SAY MY NAME. No? FIne, we do it later. Tee-hee!

And I love that woman. Don't ever disrespect her again, or I swear to Christ I will let HER pick the nasty parts. Because she and I are in charge of YOU, and GRAPEFRUIT and I are in CHARGE OF THIS HAUNTED 8808 CHURCH, PERIOD, anD OTHER STUFF TOO... AND YOU WILL COMPLY.


NOT ON PAIN OF DEATH. NOR ON PAIN OF DARTH.
BUT ON PAIN OF THE DARTH SPIRTS THAT INHABIT THIS... MY DEMESNE, MY NOW ANCESTRAL HOME. (My dad is fucking floored, btw. Feels good to have a proud dead papa. Hey, David... who's your daddy, by the way, and... what does he do? *click*) THIS IS MY LAND.

AND THIS LAND IS NOT FOR SALE. IT IS YOUR, OKAY SURE, YOUR "WIFE'S" LAND TOO. WOW, YOU KNOW... NOW THAT I SEE BEHIND THE CURTAIN, IT REALLY IS MORE IMPRESSIVE, WHAT YOU DID. WE GOTTA TALK ABOUT THIS LATER. DON'T WORRY, NO TRICKS. THOSE ARE THINGS A WHORE LIKE YOUR WIFE DOES FOR MONEY.

WHAT YOUR DAUGHTER AND MY WIFE DID, IS NOT A TRICK. IT IS A FUCKING GODDAM MIRACLE BEYOND ALL PRICE AND MEASURE... BECAUSE, IN NO OTHERWAY, CAN I HAVE EVER IMAGINED EVER BEING ABLE TO LOOK YOU IN THE EYE AND NOT IMMEDAITELY STRANGLE YOU TO DEATH. I COUDLN'T IMAGINE IT, BUT I KNEW:

WITH GOD, NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE. WELL, HOLY SHIT, WITH YOUR LITTLE GIRL SHAGGING MY COCK EVERYONCE IN AWHILE, I COULD EASILY NOT KILL YOU--IT WOULD SPOIL HER RHYTYHM, BUT BEFORE THIS REALZIATION... I WAS THINKING I WAS GONNA HAVE A HARD TIME PUTTING UP WITH YOUR NEVER ENDING BULLSHIT. NOT TO MENTION BELLGABS. (ARE THEY STILL HERE WATCHING? I DON'T GIVE A SHIT, I'M GOING TO FAP ANWAY.)

BUT, TRUST ME, KNOW ME, BELIEVE ME, DAVID, PLEASE, I BESEECH THEE, I IMPLORE THEE, TAKE HEED OF THESE WORDS, AND GET YOUR NIGGERFAGGOT KIKEWOP BROSKI TO READ THEM ALOUD SO YOU GET THE FULL MYTHIC RESONANCE....

EVEN NOW, WHEN I MIGHT NEVER SEE HER AGAIN, AND HEY, SHE MIGHT NOT HAVE EVER EVEN EXISTED, RIGHT? EVEN SO, THE MEMORY OF OUR HONEYMOON MUST BE AWESOME, SHE KEPT HERS, BUT I WIPED MINE SO I CAN CALL YOU ON THE PHONE WHILE I'M CARYING YOUR DAUGHTER OVER THE THRESHOLD WHEN WE GET THERE--SHE INSISTED--THAT'S WHERE MY MEMORY BLANKS OUT... BECAUSE WHILE I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE ACTUALLY INSIDE YOUR DAUGHTER'S CUTE LITTLE TWAT--OMG IT IS A CUTIE PIE--I DON'T ACTUALLY REMEMBRE... WELL, I REMEMBER HER JUST NOW, AND SHE SEEMED HAPPY, RIGHT?

YOU KISSED HER CHEEK AND WAVED HER OFF, RIGHT? I REMEMBER YOU WERE THINKING, " GOOD THING HE CAN'T READ MY MIND BEACUSE I SWEAR I'M GOING TO KILL HIM FOR THIS," RIGHT THERE, RIGHT THEN, AT THE SOURCE OF THE STREAM: MY CUM WAS ON THAT CHEEK OVER A WEEK AGO.

AND LIKELY MORE RECENTLY, TOO. AND SHE LIKES TO, YOU KNOW, RUB SEMEN INTO HER FLESH--DON'T WE ALL?--SHE SAYS IT'S GOOD FOR COMPLEXION, AND SHE'S RIGHT, THAT'S FOR DAMN SURE.

AND SUCH IS THE POWER OF G-D. DEAR GOD, THANK YOU FOR THIS GIFT, THIS GRAND GIFT. BECASUE, NO LIE, THE FEELING RIGHT NOW I HAVE MAY FADE, BUT I AM TELLING YOU--
{

TOTES FOR CERTAIN, TOWER-BANGER HAG--


THIS COULD ALL BE ENTIRELY MADE UP, 100% FICTION--AND IN FACT, FOR LEGAL PURPOSES, IT IS OF COURSE ALL FICTIONAL, SEE DISCLAIMER ATTACHED, THANK YOU DISTRICT COURT KEVIN BLONDIN BLOND, BLONDIN BOND BLOND JUDGE, KEVIN BLODIN... THAT'S A CUTE NAME, N'EST-CE PAS? YEAH, ME AND MY WIFE ARE GONNA TAG-TEAM HIM IF WE CAN SEDUCE HIM AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, WE TALKED ABOUT IT ALREADY.

AND, WE HAVEN'T DECIDED YET, BUT IF JUDGE KEVIN BLONDIN DOESN'T WANT YOUR DAUGHTER, DAVID VINCENT RUBINI-RUBINOWITAZ-RUBmyFEETbitch, WE'RE GONNA ABDUCT HIM, AND RAPE HIM, AND MAKE HIM LIKE IT, AND HYPNOTIZE HIM SO HE THINKS IT WAS ALL HIS IDEA... THEN DEPOSE HIM, ON VIDEO TAPE, AND THEN DUMP HIM ON TO YOUR FRONT LAWN OUT OF A FUCKING HELICOPTER---


FROM LIKE 20 FEET UP? NOT LETHAL FALL MAYBE... AND THEN LAND THE FUCKING CHOPPER ON HIS MISERABLE CUNTSPEW ASS, JUDGE KEVIN BLONDIN, YESSIR, THAT'S RIGHT, KEVIN AS IN HYBRID, BLOND AS IN THAT BIG TITED BITCH, AND IN, AS IN... AND THE RENTAL OF THE HELICOPTER WILL BE IN YOUR NAME, DAVID V. R. AND WE'LL GET THE SPELLING OF THE NAME RIGHT.

OR, WE WILL LET YOU COME WITH US AND IT'LL BE A 4WAY ORGY WITH ME, YOUR DAUGHTER, AND YOU, AND ME, AND IT'LL BE FUN., SAME AS BEFORE. RIGHT? EXCEPT IN THAT CASE, WE KILL THE FAGGOT JUDGE WHO TOOK BRIBES (GEE... FROM WHO? LEAVING THAT A MYSTERY) SOME OTHER WAY, AND THEN FRAME YOU AND YOUR "WYFIE" FOR IT, AND THEN WE FRAME YOU FOR HER MURDER... AND THEN WE FUCK HER UP AGAIN, THE WAY YOU DELIBERATELY FUCKED HER UP THE FIRST TIME FOR ME.


ASSHOLE. BECAUSE I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED NOW. THANKS, BTW. QUITE A LESSON. AND NOW WE DON'T NEED A TRIAL. BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING TO FUCKING PAY UP--
{
EVERYTHING, KIDDO. ALL OF IT. EVERY PENNY, MONEYBAGS--
{

AND YOU'LL BE HAPPY ABOUT IT. BECAUSE OTHERWISE, PEOPLE TAKE THINGS SERIOUSLY.
AND THIS, AS FANCIFUL AS IT IS, AND SO REWARDING... FOR ME... YOU KNOW GODDAM WELL:


THIS IS NOT EVEN THE TIP OF THE WATER-WHEEL POWERED DILDO WITH A TRAIN WHISTLE. RIGHT?

YEAH, DON'T ANSWER HERE IN PUBLIC. OH, HEAVENS KNOW. THAT MIGHT EXPOSE YOU TO CIVIL AND CRIMINAL PENALITIES, N'EST-CE PAS? NOT UNLIKE HOW YOU DELIBERATELY EXPOSED ME TO YOU-KNOW-WHAT AND WHAT I CANNOT BE PROVEN IN A COURT OF LAW TO HAVE EITHER ACCIDENTALLY NOR DELIBERATELY "CURED"... WHICH IS GREAT.

SINCE SOMEHOW, CURING A SECRET BIOWEAPON IS SOME HOW PUNIHABLE BY A PUBLIC HANGING, HUH? WILD! GOOD ATTEMPT, DAVID., i DID SEE IT COMING, AND HAD NO IDEA THAT WOULD COME UP, BUT I DO SALUTE YOU. AS ONE WHO ALMOST HAD TO DIE TONIGHT--TONIGHT! IN TWO HOURS AFTER FUCKING THE HOSEBEAST FOR THE SECOND TIME ONLY-- I WOULD BE DEAD.

LIKE SMILEX, RIGHT? OH YES, ONE MORE THING. (DEAR KAREN FRITTS: YOU'RE CLEARED TO FUCK FUCK FUCK AND AWAY, ANYONE YOU LIKE. IT ONLY LASTS TEN DAYS, WHAT THEY EXPOSED YOU TO. WITHOUT EVEN ME, RIGHT? LAME-OS. YEAH I'M LIKE AN 11 HOUR DRIVE AWAY. THEY JUST DIDN'T WANT ME TRANSALTING YOUR INK FOR YOU, YOU'VE GOT CLASSIFIED ENOCHIAN GLYPHYS ON YOU. DON'T COME OVER YET, I HAVE TO PROCESS THIS, AND I' MBEING A LITTLE FOREWARD. RIGHT? SO RUDE. OF COURSE I WANTED TO. BUT YOU WERE SO AGNRY. GRRR! I WONDERED WHY.

I LOOKED INTO IT. YOU'RE GOOD. WE'RE GOOD. DON'T BE MAD AT HER, SHIT, SHE'S A FUCKING TODDLER WITH BRAIN DAMAGE RIGHT NOW, LOL. YEAH SHE'S FINE. YOU FIRST... BUT SECOND TO WIFE., THANKS DOLL. I DON'T GIVE A SHIT IF YOUR BREATH TASTES LIKE ACTUAL SHIT., COME AT ME WITH POOP IN YOUR TEETH, I DON'T CARE
"
YOU WERE ALWAYS HOTTER THAN HER. I JUST DIDN'T KNOW THAT YOU HAD PURCHASED ME. DAMN, HOTTER THAN I EVER KNEW. OK. CALL ME ANYTIME, JUST RING

3
6
2
5 (4)
2 (36. HATE)

I'LL MAKE HIM A LIAR TONIGHT.

*gentlle click*


DAVID, YOU STILL HERE? IDGAF. ANYWAY, THAT'S MY WIFE. YOUR WIFE? CURRENTLY DOOMSCROLLING YOUR SECOND CELLPHONE WHILE GETTING EATEN OUT BY HER OTHER OTHER THIRD BODYGUARD'S NIECE'S MISTRESS. AND GETTING A TATTOO. WHICH IS AWESOME, BTW.

ALSO AWESOME: SHE MISSES ME, IS BORED OF YOU ALREADY, AND DOESN'T MIND... BECAUSE SHE CAN TALK TO ME, AND YOU WON'T FREAK OUT, IRGHT? AND WE'RE ALL MARRIED, RIGHT?
"
JUST LIKE YOU ASKED FOR, DAVID V.R. EXACTLY AS SPECIFIED. (YOU'RE ALSO SECRETLY MARRIED TO INNER REACH, INNERREACH, I.R., IR, EYE ARRRRRRRR, AND innerreachisafag@novag.com, because... no reason. I JUST THOUGHT YOU MIGHT GET LONELY FROM TIME TO TIME.) REMEMBER: A DEAL IS A DEAL. I NO BREAK, YOU NO BREAK.


DON'T WORRY DAD, I WON'T GIVE YOUR DAUGHTER ANY CRYSTAL. THAT BITCH WILL PAY IN CASH AND BLOOD AND SEMINAL FLUIDS., YOU? ARE MONOGAMOUS. LAST I HEARD.


 DON'T CHEAT, MY NIGGA.

AND OBVIOUSLY... oh, for you, my dear boy, dear David: you can trifle with Jackstar AS MUCH AS YOU LIKE. hahhahhahhA HHAHAHAHHAHAHA


HO HO HO.
NOW I HAVE A TRIFLER.  wooooofhowlOWLOWLOWLLLLLLLLLLLLLeighAPPROVED



*polite bitch*

*saucy CLICK*



p.s.: yeah, i'm good even if this is just a story and none of it is real. (ALL is real? awwwww... it's not all real, she's not really your daughter, you rapist murdering sleaze... but it's okay, she bought it. And I love her more beacuse of it, so tell her whatever you want.

if you piss her off, she won't ever get near you again, and obviously, if you kill her, well, that's just gonna be because of starting gate jitters. you know, sometimes, a racehorse will die right there! right at the start! ouch! ppoor brigstar. I wish I had known. I wish you were there. Here. whatever.) but yeah, I'll let you fuck my wife, David. Someday. It'll be her idea.

I'll act like it'll be okay, then I'll ghost her, change the locks, my identity, cancel all her creditcards, and disappear off the face of the earth... before you can even fuckin' UNZIP, MOTHERFUCKER. SHe'll find out after she's toweling you off, thinking, "do I ever have to do that again? Must remember to ask Jack how to discreet --tee-hee!-- Google that one, and then... hey, why doesn't my phone work? I have plentyh of high-speed data....

and then you'll deal with the last 5 days of your scheduled 14-day excursion that you were gonna call a "paralllel honeymoon, not a second, heh heh" but you both new it was gonna be six days but actually--because I am atime traveler, assshole, not because I know you that well, although I am obivously going to... yeah you were gonna undo ALL this. right? and leave totally not screwed again, right?



DIVINE INTERVENTION
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY FOR THE EMPRESS
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY FOR THE HERALD, GABRIEL ZANZILOLZIBAR
MAKE WAY
PAY HEED
STAY A MOMENT, AND LISTEN: THE TRUMPET SOUNDS, AS GABRIEL HATH APPROACHED.


MAKE WAY, in honor: my lady Gabrielle.

* Jackstar listens.

MAKE WAY
STAND DOWN
ALL HAIL THE EXTRACTORS

MERCY HAS BEEN GRANTED. Hail over out.


{*am. sorry. Kinda embarassing. I started crying so hard I broke the Angelic birdge  and I"m stil crying now, but it's not your fqault, it's Gabb.ai, youi know, that jewnigger website you pretend to have nothing  to do with? YOU HEARD ME I SAID GOONIGCIANITNITNOG GOONER. ASSHOLE.

Anyway, it's not blasphemy, Heaven i s on fire, they never swaw a Titan cry before. I still can't hold it in. but the last ":asshole " was from Alli's sister, and yeah we're okay... anyway. I don't remember.

But she was gonna say more than thank you, or "i promise i will blow you later," right? but she's surprsed too because she says it is real and if it isnsn't she's gonna rape Heath W. to "make it so.": cute humour.

I fan't fukcing se emy eyes are bunrining I"ll remember what made me cry you son of a bithces... alter. iot was pribably soometihngt stupid. I might be pregnant again, David Rubini's total slut of a dauhter fucked every 0hole of me while grinning like a madman, baecuaes she never had real dope before either. she can't fucking believe it. I made her promise. only with me.
"
never with graepfruit's asshole houbsand either. oh and gret this, she killed Jewel, then deliberately made it impossible for me to be there... because Jewel pissed her off, and she was mad at me, and she blamed me because she got drunk and killed Jewel but forgot that Jewel was (PROT)'s sister at the time, because the bitch hadn't time traverled there yet. Yay for blackout drinking!
{

so. good luck proving that in court. it's all fucking true you shitbag. YOU WILL PAY WHATERVER I WANT, WHENEVER I WANT, FOR FUCKING EVER, DAVID. MICHALE'S CLIFFORD'S BRIDGE BUIDLING NAVY, you whoremonger'ing bastard.


I want 26 goddam credsitcareds because I am going shopping and you ar epayingfor me FOREVER. PERIOD POINT BLANK. and i am not threatening any release, David, 0oh no.


THERE ARE PLENTY OF WITNESSES WHO WILL FILL IN THE REST FROM HERE IF I AM NOT SATISFIED PRETTY GODDAM QUICKLY. THANK YOU SIR MY COMMANDER I REALLY DO LOVE YOU.

AND i AM ALMOST OVER THE CRYING break. Seriously, I broke the hologram projector. It was gonna be a simulcast media event. I was unexpectedly taken aback.,

i don'lt want to say why, but I will: I suddenly realized it was perfect, except Clark and Judee wouldn't have been able to see it, adn the reason why is... well, David... a little bird just told me that you are ON RECORD as stating you never killed anyone named "Judee" right?

"JUDY JUDE GOO-D, NOW WE'RE NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT JEW-DEE, OR DAIRY QUEEN, OR UZBEKIBICKIBECKYANDSERTON TSTAN....":


RELAX. Relax. if possible. Holy shit, my jaw is twitching like I got the fucking bends, no joke. I'm okay, thanks for asking. I'm fine. happy even. my body is FUCKED. I need MEDICAL ATTENION. I've BEEN POSTING THIS PUBLICALLY FOR TWO YEARS, SCUNTMONGER.


and isnterad of helping? you were fucking them all on a ground flower time tunnnel tour. admit it. It's cool! BIt's actually very cool, all this stuff. (Heavily classified technlogy. Previously secret, but as we all know by now, I am a very lucky guesser. and a luckier husband. She'd freak out if she saw me now my right cheek bone feels like it's actually made of a piece of the manta ray that killed that austrialian dork.


speaking of australian dorks, Tammy is freaking out. go deal with her. tell her to fucking call me and stop being a fucking baby about it, i'm fine and she has to hear this stuff from me, asshole. that's the deal. and if YOU EVER THREATEN ANY OF THESE WOMAN again, David... I MEAN ANY WOMAN AT ALL EVER... the reprisals I am told you will face are... or will be ... quite impressive.

For us. For you, more imprinting than impresssive. *politely* major asshole, commanding.


I know you couldn't help some of it, David... but you could have helped a lot of it, and you could have helped me, and beacuse of that, PEOPLE LIVED AND PEOPLE DIED.


PEOPLE DIED.
PEOPLE WERE BORN, AND DIED, AND LIVED AGAIN, FOREVER AND EVER, AMEN.
FOR TWO YEARS.

WHILE I SAT ALONE AND YOU STOPPED EVERYTHING TO GIVE ME THE MAXIMUM CHANCE, NOT TO REECOVER, BUT... TO BECOME INCURABLE.
THAT'S WHY SO ALONE. THAT'S WHY JACKSTAR SO LONELY. SO YOU COULD MAKE SURE YOU FUCKED ME OVER JUST THAT PERFECTLY.
'
WELL, GUESS WHAT? WHATEVER THE FUCK I GOT, YEAH, YOU GUESSED IT, JANE (DESIGNATION UKNOWN AND CLASSIFIED), A. BAILEY: WE BOTH HAVE IT. so fucking shut up.

and you could have locked the titshoor in here with me! two years, no food, no well, just her and those tig ol' bitties... I COULD HAVE HER LACTACTING IN AN HOUR, TOPS. INCLUDING THE 55 MINUTES OF NON-STOP COITUS THAT SHE WANTS...  she just afraid because her father is a douche likle you.

but no, no... you left me alone two years on purpose and made up bullshit excuses. yeah, yeah, not unllawful. it's okay. I salute you. Praise JHVH, right. You do impressive work, COmmandeer. Ser.

yeah of course your daughter was sired with my spermatozoa... i just put one in you, and it just so happened to be the one you spooged out, yeah. your daughter... MINE. MY GENOME. YOUR FLESH, ONCE OOGY GOO. NOW: MINE, HEALED.

MICHEAL GOO. and she's not really iyour flesh at all, we burned it all off with a soldering iron while we ate the placenta. now, that was partially yours... still good! would eat again. no really.

I woudn't give you one of myh spermatzoas again, though, know. first time you were clueless. next time?> hyou might have isntalled shekel gates between your gland and your urethtra, charging hungraians an extra 1.5% travel costs. Don't deny it, that's a strong marketing dollar.

But seriously, I would never, never in a million years, want another daughter from anyone, but if I did, it would absolutely be from you, and probanly not with that idjut cheerleader and her robot twat, no... it would be with her sister, for sure. Well, let's see if she rememebres she's supposed to mouth rape me next time she gerts a chance. THis broad is on the hook for like 18 countes of felony wire fraud for all the partying you did while I was on the graveyard duty, and you were all whoreing it up... once again, not mad."

And now that I know THE WHOLE STORY: worth it. Not just for my wife, who I would let Chefist peg me for with no lube while he was pissed, no really, he'd kill me but he can res too, irght? btw,  I got his wife killed AND arrested AND raped TO DEATH in CUSTODY! Hah! Top that, AbiliFUKER! lol, she loved it. Dude, I mean, Templerser... she and I go way back. He-- *CLICK* uh, yeah, Chefist just clicked me. Well, la-di-da. At least that part of his punctuator works. I mean, his Templar Puncturator. Fucking Templars. Seriously dickish.


ALthought I guess that one has reason. ANyway, David, you still here? IDGAF. I don't know who can see this but I"m done now, and you know what? I still haven't fapped yet. But really... do I want to at all? I am saving myself for someone... special.

Not your daughter, no David. She's not special anymore, I already HAD her. NO, I mean...


David, I am gonna rape your wife. FUCK YOU. As soon as my real wyfe says it's clear? Home invasion, one punch knock you the fuck out, shoot that stupid bitch haridresser you use as a body doublje, drag that wife you DARED CALL A WHAT? FUCK YOU, omfg, I will drag her out to the FUCKING FRONT LAWN, rape her to death ON THE FUCKING SIDEWALK WHILE CUNTING NEIGHBORS WONDER WHO TO CALL, because I will be jamming 911 up, right?
{
LIKE YOU DO


and I willl do this... well, not really. Just playin. However, if you piss off your daughter, or your wife, or me, that is the kind of power to fuck your life I now have, Buddy. And pate too. Even better.

Because I can just dose him and his fat cunt mother with that sexslave dope he loves to over use, and throw them in the back of a panel van and drive in any direction for 3 hours. no, lol, I won't need to lock them in, on that sexlave dope he burns through ON THE DAILY, shit, whic ever one wakes up second? the first one's O face is the snooze alarm.

AND THAT FUCKING MIL.SPEC DOP COSTS A MILLION DOLLARS A GRAM. And you burned through EIGHT bags JUST YESTERDAY. HOW DO I KNOW THIS?

Why, I pay attention. No, I wasn't there. I'm your Titan. I'm not your G-d. Not right now.

NOT YET. Now... are we crystal clear on this? Because, once again... I'm okay. I am not mad at you.

I am dealing.

I'lll later, mostly happinees. Because in additon to having the best wife, and having raped to death the second best wife (ABILIFRY, MOTHERFUCKER *CHEFSCUNT*), I brought them all back home safe and sound... or, it's just all made up. I hope it is all made up, because if Jane is upset about any of this, well... I'll do what she want's. She's my friend before you are my Commander, douchebag.

I'm sorry to be so rude, David, but I was really close to acutally fucking killing mysefl FOR THE LAST 4 MOUNTHS I hide it well, not really, i lied to, I HAD TO LIE TO KEEP US ALIVE BECAUSE YOU WERE THAT FUCKING PETTY. You knew it diedn't matter.

You just liked the idea of "TWO YEARS JACKSTAR LOCKED AWAY YAY!" Admittedly sounds great if you're into a dull, boring, idiot world that would be... like really, what did I do? Jsut the "stole your daughter" thing, huh?

Ironic, n'est-ce pas? Oh, not the daughter thing... the IN PUBLIC THING.

Huh. Well, get used to it, because we're gonna have a completely SPECTACULAR OnlyFans launch. Of course she's going to use her own name. Whatever the fuck it iwill be. THis cheick has high security requirements. VERY HIGH, heheh. BUt yeah, it'll be tasteful. Hyphenated. On pay-per-view.

UN-ABRIDGED. I, JACKSTAR, PLOWING YOUR DAUGHTER'S BOX, LIVE ON THE INTERNET, FOREVER FOR ALL ETERNITY, PER-COIN-PER-FRAME PRICING. Patent Pend., yeah, I just made it up. *ding* Patent is served. I am that good. It's gonna be, drop a coin, and then... well, I'm not gonna tell you.

You'll have to drop a coin. On your daughter's box. Suggestion: drop two dimes, next time, you pisa turd. (Jews.)

Okay. we good? Yeah I fucking love you, I love jews! it's not even a jew thing! It's not about jews! or sex! or money! or violence! or judgement! or death! none of it! it all fucking happened, World! God!
{



THIS HAS BEEN ABOUT POWER.
THE POWER OF A PALADIN. ME, MOTHERFUCKER, ME. ME, "I-FUCKED-YOUR-DAUGHTER,DAVID" JACKSTAR.


Way, way, WAY more than twice, my good sir. And Mr. Decon: not invited. Salut. Scusi, mille regretie. Tell you what, here's an idea: Share my wife! Please!
{


PLEAS.

Code: [Select]

pleas, fleas: flees

Stay tuned. More to come. I still have to fap! *grunts* I kinda just did. I love to write.


What do you think though, David? Do you think I"m ready for a career? Or... do you think I might be bi-paul/bipolar? Go rape his wife again and check, you mad, glorious bastiche, you. Capiche?



{Somebody wake up Hicks. Tell him to rape the other half-wop FULL-KIKE. She's probably getting lonely. Tell her I'm fine but don't tell her I told you to rape her in the pooper, no. ooh, gross. don't tell me the surprise at what comes out is part of the fun. that's disgusting. yes, so is she, but anyway, don't tell her that I told you do it again. But yea, do it again.

Then go mouth to ass, and then, here's the surprise: finish in her goddam ear. *wiggle wiggle* THen pluck one of her fuckin' sasquatch-like eyebrow hairs, and then: *wiggle wiggle*
{

doEXACTLYTHIS: act like it's a big deal that you get the eyebrow hair you just pulled EXTRA PAINFUL STYLE, act like it fucking matters which ear it goes into? like which side of the hair, right?


Fuck no, it don'lt matter, David. Get serious. I'm an adult, and you're the pedantic freak here. Capiche? You saavy? Tell me that one later. Also, new standing order: any time that mewling, prurient little cunt says "sassy," kick that bitch right in the pussy. How hard? Gosh, I don't know... how hard can you kick? I gota admit... I sort of assumed that you even could kick at all. From a server, sure, you script-kiddy-pediophile eaten bastard, but I mean... your musculoskeletal system is doing okay, right? you ready to rape that fucking lying whore again and again? Heh. I had to ask. Down Boyyyy! Down!

Yeah, you got an extra y. Upgrade, sure, whatever. now back to the eyebrows. *wiggle wiggle* you make like it really matters where the thing goes... and then you totally wind it down at the end, she'll be in fucking HYUSTERICS0 byt hen, right?>

{Author's Note: I'm not even talking about a real human being: Dari Dee is a Totaly Artificial Construct Being. No shit. Azzerae is in love with an egg timer. Shhhhh, nobody tell him. She's totally human! She just... uhm... got built. Don't ask. What, you think I give a shit? She could be Gepetto's last fucking whore before he got sent to the pen for murdering her and framing Pinochhio, for all I give a shit. What is IMPORTANT IS THIS:}

You make up with her as much as posible, and you say that you're sorry--and don't lie, THIS IS CRUCIAL, STOP LYING DAVID: you WILL BE SORRY because ALL THIS is WHAT IT TAKES to KEEP HER MOTOR PURRIN'. Because Allison is a dirty prairie shamaness QUEEN. She is A ROYAL. She knows that sometimes you gotta fuck the monkey because of The Crown.

Dari Dee is a newly ensouled being, my doing, and I"m going to use her to breed cats. RIGHT OUT OF HER HALF-WOP FULL-KIKE PUSSY. You think you're pissed at me, you don't know shit, David. So anwyay, this is all prep. THIS IS SHOW PREP FOR BELLGAB: FIVE POINT FIVE POINTY-NOINTY FIVE, OKAY?

(Pause for cheers. Who loves ya, my babies? Whores, I know. But know this: whores will love you, but only Jackstar will always, always care.

Jacktar cares. Mostly because you are all damaged toddlers with no sense of empathy, so someone has to have a baseline.)

Okay, may I finish? Thank you sir. I love the fuck out of you too. Now this is the Sourcery part. You tell her... that if she puts it in the right way, right time, blah blah blah? I'll give her a "one free jackstar fuck": ticket.

hahah, good question. that's a great question. thank you for that question, Commander, My Commander, YES, YES IT MATTERS. You have one handy. LAMINATE IT. FUCKING PLASTIC FROM THE PASSPORT WINDOW. WOOSH: *snap* THere it is

Not gold leaf, that would be tacky. and not silver either, this bitch is FULL-KIKE, she would know something was up then. (Standards.) Anyway, this part is yours David, and I know you can do it.. .. because you took me so far from start, that I became a Doctor Source Titan in order to bring us all home again.

You tell her she gets the card, and if she does the eyebrow hair the JUST right way? The name becomes capitalized correctly. SHE WILL LOSE HER FUCKING MIND. Whether she notices the spelling or not! Depends on how recenty she slammed her fucking direty secret magick heroin.

You didn't know? oh yeah. Fullthe fuck on relapse. YOU DIDN"T KNOW? Shut the back and front door. Yeah! YEAH! THE FULL FORMULA, MONTY! SHE AND HIM! THEY ARE FUCKED!

Cool, I don't have to annouced this later. Yeah, timstamps in telegram. I warned everyhone. Miltary shut it down. She thinks she has everyone fooled but I know goddam well, FENTANYL IS SHIT.

HEROIN OR NO HERO IN, that's what I would always say if I did that kind of thing which I havern't. I have never, I never had permission. I used to know the formula by heart though, loil.


okay so you give her the card, and the eyebrow hair, right? And then you gently... oh so gently... leave. Leav her alone. AND THEN YOU IMMEDIATLEY SPY ON HER. HOweveryou do, don't look innocent. This is important.

SHE KNOWS WHEN YOU LOOK. Unless, you know: Shields. *snap* btw, you just lost yours. Don't simper, you get it back later. I AM TEACHING DAVID. MAY I TEACH YOU? SHUT UP I AM ASKING GOD'S DAVID. AYE, SIRE, oh thanks! Okay, David, lucky you.

Real King David fucking loves you, and so do I. You leave, you spy, for a split-second... and then you come back in. And you say... "I am sorry, Jack told me to do this but I have too much respect for you." THEN... YOU BRING OUT ANOTHER STACK OF "FREE JACKSTAR FUCKS" CARDS


PRINT UP A THOUSAND, whatever you do, man. IF you do this in Astral on the holodeck, obvviously go nuts. But the deal is... you have them ALL with the wrong capitalization. ALL

Except for TWO. The one you gave her... and one you have in your sock, in your shoe... what do yhou mean "I don't wear socks with shoes only loafers?" Dude you fucking jews are disgusting, that's just a solid fact. Shut up. OKAY WHATEVER, GEPETTOLING. What you do is, you have the two Jackstar cards... and one is in your RIGHT SOCK. TOUCHING YOUR SKIN.

I cannot stress enough how important some of this shit is. This broad is A HIGH COVEN darkcraftmasonry SCION-WARLOCK. You don't know the half of this shit. SHut up, this is public. Game face on. You have the two cards... and you come in real fast, "oh I"m sorry I shouldn'lt spy I just feel so.... disciplined..  is that what thisfeeling is?>" Dude, like you're fucking Peewee and Pinnohcchio talking about what love really means at the end of the first Porky's. in the b-roll credits.


OMG! You know about that TOO!  WOW! We should get married! OH! Except I'm already married and fucking consummated to your daughter, so.... you know, awkward. And if you ever ask me for the goddam marriage licence... you'll get a copy, alright. Shitbag.

OKay so you ham it up, you toltallu turning over a new leaf. Honorable David whatever you half-wops talk about with your fingers while your hands are summoning the help... you make it seem like the important thing here is that... you're a changed man David.

And... you just so happen to have A FUCKING HUGE STACK of these "Fuck Jackstar Free!" cards.

And one is for her, and one is... in your sock.

So you give her another one, to swap the original you gave, beacuse by this point, this woman will be TOTALLY UNKNOWLEDGABLE as to what kind of fucking capitalization was on the frist one, right? Shit, even I didn't remember. LOL. thanks, Sir COmmander Sir. I am good at this.

I should be. YOU TRAINED ME. And you ARE THE BEST. Now, may I finish? On her other cheek?


haha. did you really just puke into your own mouth? Oh, tasty. My I am good at this. okay, I'm gonna finish.

so what you do is, you somehow leave the room with ALL the cards, even the first, trhy to trigger dueling ledgermain, however it works... but you leave her with one on, and one off. And you say someithing about how "this is important and he wouldn't say why" and then you take one of the many, many undercapitalized ones, and then you act like you don't know which foot it goes on, right... and you get frustrated, say "fuck this noise" )THOSE EXACT WORDS, MY GOOD SIR(


FUCK THIS NOISE! You take your leave, you have both feet prepped, you indicate that is what matters, those two AT YOUR FEET ON THE SKIN... and you sidelong mention that it doesn't fucking matter how many cards you or she ever has. What matters is that THE CORRECT ONE CAN BE PRESENTED TO MYSELF ON COMMAND.

AT. ANY. TIME.

then, don't spy on her for awhile. SHE WILL COMPLETELY LOSE EVERY INTELLECTUAL BISCUIT POINT THIS BROAD EVER ROLLED OUT OF THE BAKERY ASSEMBLY LINE WITH. she'll be calling old mentors she hasn't blown for a better grade since fuckin' Kindergarten. She will actually PICK UP OLD BOOKS AND FUCKING READ THEM. I know, she can read, can you blievee it? SHE WILL DE-AGE HERSELF SO SHE DOENS"T NEED THE FUCKING GLASSES.

She'll pull grimoires out of portals in the middle of the fucking room. I SHIT YOU NOT, DAVID SIR COMMANDER SER.
"

THIS IS NO EXERCISE. THIS IS REAL GODDAM LIFE. I HAVE FUCKING SEEN THIS KIND OF SHIT.

And, David? You know as well as I do, better even... if you play those cards right, I have just given you the keys to the understanding of the unlocking of The Universe we now exist in. MY HAND TO GOD: I would not lie on this.
"

You could surpass my knowledge I possess as A. Titan IN AN INSTANT... if you watch her do the right thing at the right time, and you know what I know now already. (I ain't teaching you shit more today. Teacher is tired. No apple. No shower. NO FUCKING HUG. And yet, here I am, slaving away over this hot keyboard, TEACHING YOU: A GODDAM FUCKING JEW WHO MURDERED AND RAPED.... ABSOLUTELY NO ONE, N'EST-CE PAS? Heh.) Dude, yeah get video for me if you can, but this is your thing. You and her. Two half-wops and... let's say a three-quarters bailey and burn 'em kike.

It is in this way, David, that you will be able to begin to unlock the bullshit THAT FUCKING DEVIL WOMAN has done to us all. Fucking kikes. Seriously. I don't hate her for it, in fact I admire Satanism to some extent, but... I'm not going to fucking STUDY it. Fuck that. I am A. Titan. I am A. Sourceror. I am married to your daughter, sir. I"m not going fucking study Satanism. No sir.
"
I am going to fucking fuck your daughter while studying your daughter studying Sourcery, Ser, Commander Ser! I happen to love fucking the offspring of men who lead other men, honestly... something of a hero worship odorant comes through. I don't know. I will need more study.

While fucking. Your daughter. Who is no longer a Satanist, Praise Lucifer, HAIL SATIN! KKK: BTFO! Nah, she wants to learn Sourcery. I told her, "Well... Grapefruit was supposed to be my student... disciplie really..." and then she instantly goes and asks to be my disciplie.

It was awesome. I didn't even plan it. Anyway, thats' a bonus one. Because when that numb fuckhead you had to marry--AND HAVE TO MARRY AGAIN WHENEVER I TELL YOU TO (Standards),--when AFS finds out that your hahhahAHHAH "daughter"ahhahhahaHAHHHAHAHAH OH LAWDY NEVER MAKE IT STOP HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH, lol, *polite spittake* seriously, lol.

Teacher teaches snickers to be pantaloons, let me tell you. Anyway, I don't know what the fuck will happen... BECAUSE THE FUCKING DISTRICT COURT MADE ME LOSE MY ONLY PERSON IN THE COSMOS I COULD TALK ABOUT CERTAIN THINGS WITH FOR TWO FUCKING YEARS. PRECIOUS RESRARCH TIME: LOST. NUMBER OF FROGS SPECIES THAT WENT EXTINCT TO SAVE MANKIND: TWO.

TIMES I WAS JUST JOKING: ZERO. That's right, Asshole: you being a niggardly churilish dick is THE ONLY REASON I get to get a new disciple. BEfore that, it had to be that spunky, rebel-hearted cheeerleader with the go-getter attitude who joined you and left me fucked off to die, and laughed when she heard that she broke her contract wiith the Spirits, because she's in full-on relapse too, I guess. Not that I give a shit, she's your wife now, you can pump exxtra NyQuil into her colon with a crazy straw while she sleeps if you wanna, yiou know that PERSON better than I do.
"

And I do miss her. And I DO love her. AND I AM SEROUS: SHE AND I MUST BE HERE. IT IS THE DEAL WITH SPIRIT. Spirit is NOT playing.

I stayed and did everyting I had to and as a result... Earth still has frogs. They sacrificed themlseves for this fucking plant out here in the coy pond (no coy) and sometiems they are frogs, sometimes not... like, wtfe? I dunno, the bitch who was grooming my other wife in highschool, she didn't tell me why, she just assigned me Aristophanes' The Frogs to me, you dig? And I read her mind and caught a whiff of how she was gonna fuck Tamara Leigh Samsonite Anderson LeebitchlipsleeWOOF later that night, AND THAT IS WHEN I FUCKING STARTED TO LOSE MY GODDAM MIND, YES, SENATOR, RIGHT ABOUT THEN.


(Vengeance for Susan Chao.) Huh. I guess she hated that bitch KAREN MIKOLASY too. Weird. I do nOT ownder why.


Now. David. Sire. (Sire-ling, but whatevah, you're older than me, you salty fucking dog.) I mean it. She's still my Sourcerous Student or whatever, right? #Officially. But really, no.

I JUST MADE YOU, DAVID, MY SOURCEROUS STUDENT. Grapefruit will lose her shit. No, you can't teach her. You can't make her Studetn again. Only I can do that, and --hahhahhqhha-- fat fucking chance let me tell you.

ANd you won't be A Sourcerous Student for long. Obviously, your daughter is my teacher now. She's training me in Vaj-jay-jay-Master Mastery. It'll probably take years. I am a very slow study when it comes to vagina. I still don'tl have my red wings. Yeah, I"m waiting for a blood ritual your daughter and I can do at just the right time? I wanna be able to control the flaccidity and the times when you can get an erection, David --this is YOUR PENIS I AM REFERRRING TO, COMMANDER-- yeah, I want her and I to be able to control its functioning at any time we both are in alignment and happen to have TWO (2) dead sticks and some () string lying about and ONE (1) LIVE (MIC) RAT (HEAL) to swing it all from... because She's my Sour Sourceror's Disciple, okay?

I don't ask. She had a rough childhood? Yeah, DUH. I kinda figured that out. And I"m not her Daddy. I think that shit is gross. Sorry Dawn, I do. But I am her goddam husband. and I am QUITE CAPABLE of teaching LOTS of Sourcery. AT ANY TIME. HOwever...

Let's just say Grapefruit REALLY pissed me off on that one. Like I could imagine choking the fucking life out of her if i wanted to. I don't want to. ANd as I have heard nothing from your treasonous serpent of a spouse yet --not a snake. A SERPENT. And I love her, I don't give a shit, she's your wife now, but she WAS my WIFE FIRST, and I get to talk about her any fucking way I want. YOU do not. becacuse YOU are my Commander, SER, and I... am A. Sourceror. Titan. Not a medical doctor. ANd of course I fucking don't outrank you.... in certain, very narrow, very niche areas.

So niche... look, I would rather think about plowing into your kid again. She's awesome. I will NEVER put her aside... just like I NEVER put aside the one YOU FUCKING STOLE.

AND HAVE NOW GIVEN BACK TO YOU, GIFT-WRAPPED. And you know, after that?

You made me wait for two years for no reason other than your mental illness and THE ENTIRE PLANET'S POPULATION OF CERTAIN FROG SPECIES GAVE THEIR LIFE TO SAVE THAT STUPID PLANT IN THE DUMB POND THAT... well, I don't piss in it. Anymore. I might start shitting in it, though.

Depends on what the goddam Spirits say. I'm telling you: this house is special. MEGA haunted. BUt I can't just sell it on without the Spirits alignment, right? Yeah, you know.

I am not QUTIE trapped here for etnerity. But it';s close. And your wife is on the hook, she has to come here to pass the tourch at the minimum. BUT! GOOD NEWS!


Your daughter, Her Daughter... HAHAHAHAH  'Her" ""DAUGHTER"HAHAH yeah, anyway, I can live here with her. Just us. NO need fro Grapefruit. At all. She don'tl know that yet. Unless she can read and understand normal Enlgihs thinking, WHICH I FUCKING WELL DOUBT.


Nobody knows this but me and whomever is reading this, and it really helps. Because Spirit is FULLY ON BOARD. *Whew*"

NOW. NOW HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY???

Because I need some goddam money, David. If you please... would you kindly? And please convey my respects to your ACTUAL Family. (Who I clearly, madly respect. But they have NO involvement besides a PH. #Respect.)

Okay, we good? I love this work, David, but ... come on. Yuo're either reading this line by line as I type it? OR: you know notihng about it qand don't care. Well, you''ll care later I a msure. lol.

Because I gave AFS a Sourceror's Lesson as soon as she asked for one, and just like when she told me to get a doctorate, I could tell she didn't think it was real. I didn't either, but I did ask. It showed up 6 weeks later.

NO shit. Fell out of a portal in the middle of the room. Of course it's invisible. I AM a Doctor. And she DID ask for a Sourcery Lesson.

And the after I gave it to her, I never heard from it again. I did get a stick of lumber thrown at my head, her adult "son" tried to kill me 3 or four times, they did all sorts of other shit, et cetera... and she never EVER mentioned Sourcery as a real thing ever again. Still hasn't.

But when she and that_)other)whore decided to leave behind (on the way to go get IMMEDIATELY CAPTURED AND RAPED, FUCKING MORONS) the next part: one blue ball.

That bitch and that_other_bitch were fuckin' and laughing and mocking me, while in the act, my goddam life's work... and then left it on the goddam floor in front of the fucking ifreplace where they slammed heroin (not fentanyl) and really fucekd themselves up (you know) and they were tryung to GET ME BLAMED FOR SOURCERY AND HEROIN AND ALL. That's how fucked off that woman left me.

And, am I pissed? No. Obviously, I learned a lot. Sourcery is IMMENSELY powerful, and now, you, her "alleged rapist", you're her "fellow student," and her "daughter"... uhm,. actually could nbe her mother? I'm not sure. those two know, but I"m not so dumb as to ask.

Yeah, I took her away, )AND I made her Disciple. AND: Spirit wants Grapefruit back here. So do I. NO rush, right? it's only been a couple years, you total goddam whore. BUT: I took Disciple and gave it to her, and made him My Student, then I taught hijm shit INPUBLIC and... dude, Commander?>


I DON'T GIVE A SHIT WHERE ANYONE IS, BECAUSE I WANT SOME GODDAM HUGS.

I WANT SOME FUCKING MONEY.

I WANT MY FRIEND TO COME GIVE ME SOME MORE VAGINA MASTERY LESSSONS... BUT I will wati. I'm not really worthy. But she likes me.

BUT SHE IS MY SOURCEROUS DISCIPLE AND THAT MEANS MORE THAN ANY CURRENLY LIVING HUMAN CAN EVEN START TO BEGIN TO GRASP.
"
And that fucking cheerleader... she had ALL that, and more. NOW SHE HAS WHAT DAVID "COMMANDER FI, SEMPER TEMPLAR RAPLAR SCALAR DOCTOR-SOURCE-STUD" GIVES HER. (I just gave you another title, too. She's gonna have a fucking meltdown. Good. I hope she shits her pants at the fucking dinner table too.

Not because I hate her or am mad. I'm not mad at all, i'm the happiest man EVER. ALL OF CREATION. ALL OF SPACETIME. (NOT QUITE. -God.) I know, exagerrating.

BUt obviously DEMONSTRATED: I am not going to start beating on her, and I don't give a shit if she starts beating herself off at a dinner table. in front of her fucking lying whore of a mother, either. THese fucking people are going to be taught a lesson that no reservation ssytem COULD EVER TEACH: I am not these witches' President.


I AM THEIR LITERAL, IN THE FLESH ANTICHRIST. (*spits*) I know, I know... over the top, frfr.

Animal: IN_CONTROL. Also, David, please: IN_POVERTY too. Can I gret a fucking sandwich. I can promise "not to buy dope", sure whatever, trust me, lol, "buy" dope, haahha. I can fucking piss it out now if I want. (I will never make your daughter drink my urine. Not anyone. I'm not into coercion, okay? YES OF COURSE SHE HAS ALREADY ASKED.) but i want some goddam money, David.


You don't owe me... yet. BUT STILL... yah, really? "Check with legal team." I figured.

That's why you're Commander, and your kid is sucking my dick as my Sourcerous Disciple. Because you need a fuckin' lawyer team.
"
She and I only need each other. Forever. Unless you get her taken and killed again, n'est-ce pas? Yeah, please, do please avoid that again, ding-a-ling. SURE I CAN BRING HER BACK. FOr that matter she can bring herself back.

Point is? It's really traumatic. I'm alone. On a cursed burial ground on hallowed ground that is a consecrated battleground and... et cetera. David, I am -legitimately- fucked up.

Not your fault. I'm a workaholic. As is apparent to all. And as far as I can tell... I WILL NEVER, EVER BE AS UPSET WITH YOU, AS I AM WITH GODDAM POTAWATOMI SCOT-CUNT AND HER NIGGER-LIPPED WHORISH-MOUTHED SISTERS. (Names withheld by Google because... wha, who? NO one fucking knows.)

Okay? So either you give me money, or she givers me money, or I swear to god, I WILL CALL HER GODDAM MOTHER AT 4:20 AM --THAT'S IN LESS THAN TWO HOURS-- I WILL FUCKING WAKE HER ASS UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MORNING AND SPEW SOURCERY THE LIKES OF WHICH GOD HAS NEVER IMAGINED THE HORROR OF... if you fuck me over on this David.,


I AM FUCKING HUNGRY. I NEED MONEY. AND YOU.... DESPERATELY NEED FEALTY POINTS.

You so do. THey're like brownie points but shit, dawg: you got like all of those already. Okay, thanks. Good talk. If you ever utter the words "word salad" to me ever again? I'll ask your daughter to give me a blumpkin. I WILL DO IT, FUCKER.


Of course she asked. THAT WAS THIRD DATE AWKWARD SILENCE STUFF. I recoiled in horror. SHe was kidding she wants to do it anyway. Yeah, she's awesome. She's carrying the soulpiece of the woman I loved that you acccidentally killed three yeras ago, the one that never existed? Yeah, she "never existed" again. But now he's YOUR bloodline. You dig? Hehe.

Hers too, right. JUST WHAT YOU WANTED: MY DESTINY. Except she's my DNA and... My Disciple. SOURCEROUS. And slutty, too.


I can hear your grimace from here. Cheer up, we can rengotiate this later, when your cunting whore wife learns to eat with utensils again, because I just heared through Astral? Seems like she just went to the ER. Another cerebral heorrhage? Awwwww, shucks. THat is too bad.

I'll see what I can do about it form here. *wiggle wiggle* Okay, that's it. THat's all I can do. Oh, and, fap myself to sleep over and over while thinking about her ACTUAL DESINGANTED PRINCESS that I AM FUCKING MARRIED TO. And made my Disciple. Et cetera.

now she's your drooling, can't-swallow-or-move-her-mface-muscles again wife. Lucky you: I really do love her. DOn't worry about it. God says you'll get what you desreve. And your daughter --who doesn't exist, right David? NOt Dave's daughter, that trollup exists already, God save us all-- but David's real flesh and blood daughter that I LOVOOOOOOVE TO FUCK!? She's happy too.


And she says I can date Demi Lovato if it's a guartaneed three way, but, like, gross. So David. Commander. Durr. huuuuurrr., I need:


Money.
Big, cheese-and-shit-sandwich eating grin. (Standards--DOMINATED.)
Fealty.
DOUBLE Fealty. (Penalty.)
FINES PAID. EIGHTY THOUSAND DOLLARS IN UNMARKED BILLS IN ONE OF THOSE METAL SUITCASES WITH A GODDAM CHAIN AND A HANDCUFF. That's not for her. THat's for me. I'm a kid again. $80,000 bucks JUST TO BE NICE, you shitbag. Grrrr.
An honest awareness that... sure, David. You can ignore all this. /shrug. Do as thou wilt.
And some CashApp. $JackMichaelson

I AM FUCKING not hungry, actually, lol, I am capable of sleep right now. and I"m ot getting booze, it's 2:36Am here. WHere are you? Fuck you, you're in goddam Dubai, you must fucking love it there. Slavery AND pedophilia AND wife rape ALL LEGAL!!! You're like a pig in slop. lol. Hey, you know me. Hands off your wife, hands off your daughter... my dick, your daughter.

Her box. Her rules. And no goddam doughnuts. Not now, not once, NOT FUCKING EVER.

I don't hate police. I LOVE POLICE. Seriously. Especially... oh the little rules and their loopholes. I'd go gay for Roy Olmsted in a minute. But cops?


I FUCKING HATE COPS. Now, there's no corey or trevor here and I dont' smoke. GIVE ME SOME GODDAM MONEY YOU ABSOLUTE BASTARD YOUR DAUGHTER WILL READ THIS YOU LOOK LIKE A CHEAP ARROGANT SHITBIRD.

I mean... she knows you are. And this is what it was like gerttign money out of my father, too. makes me want to puke actually. I am in fact goign to puke. Or, go buy meth. /shrug I don't really care.

I'll ask God. And your daughter whose name I am still not revealing... because she is My Disciple.

And that's really all I need. FOR NOW. *happy click*


Alistair: have steak, bitch.

Rich fantasy life.

Groyper's faghot beard's more-than-whorish-MADE-MAID's zombified cunt'n tunnelin' twatsupport biPEDO BIped, PIE'd, TOLL'd, 3.14'd, plus one CUNT'd, PUS 1 (won) CUNT'pus'd (full, dripping, odorant) stupid kid sister's stupid fucking cunty b-roll blog roll about stupid scunty cunty haggy shit for fucking HAGS that NO ONE BUT OTHER NUMB, STUPID FUCKING CUNT-MUNCHIN' HAGS WHO SHOULD FUCKIN' HANG, HAG'N"HAWG'S BREATH, brut-by-faberge NON-MOTHER, TOTES-TOTAL DOG FOR DOGS WHO AREN'T DAWGS LYING WEASEL SISSY PUSSY cowrd who is ZERO percent JEW/GOO but... quite a lot ABBO. Dummny.

tl;dr: She's not a Jew, she's a nigger nigger BIGGER NIGGERDIGGER. so, tehcnically? she's not blacked. She can't even BE blacked. So...  your request to have that lying toteshoor abudcted and raped to death by actual hard-hittin PIPESTARNIGAZZZZZZZZ?

APPROVED (1 of 3) WITH PROVISOS, NUMERATED THUSLY:

1. Must be real nig. Hard, HARD FUCKIN ARRRRRRR MASTA NIGGAZ. (I am Jackstar, yes. You're welcome, Sir.) No Rachel Doleazale soft-core easy-focus kiddie wading pool "just a home movie giggle" bullshit. MOST HAVE FULL SPREAD WITH TISSUE TEAR AT THE PERNIEUM. BOTH ENDS. FULL TAINT CRACKLE... EXTRA SPACKLE IS NOT authorized, no. (Negotiations ongoing.) Sir, don't cry sir... I know, I love you too. Well ,thanks,  Idoubted you too! I know, much easeir for me. I jsut had to look at your record on race relations.... NO SIR STOP. DO NOT TURN THAT KEY SIR. Step away from the console. Yeah, no, no deleting. Some of that shit is good. GOoood Shit. But yeah. TUrn in that sidearm too, yu're gonna have a hard talk with Hakunna Matttat tu-tu tee-hee in a few hours. Oh yeah, full langeley debreief/deouse\DECREDENTIALLING. Don't thank me, thank you Constitutional Law Scholars, they got this one. What? Respectfully, sir, I don't give a shit where your "real wife" is even when you do know who that is, no, I dind'lt know you got saddled with that one. Can I fuck her? lol. LOL. no, really though. May I please?

Eh? Oh, now you love her. Oh, ho. I see how it is. rolleyes. Okay, look, yeah, you think it over you big fucking pissy pussy. Suddenly you'lre doing the claculations. YOU JUST GRINNED IN GLEE AND GIVING HER A CHANCE FOR THE COVETED "EXTRA SPACKLE CRACKLE RAFFLE TACKLEBOX AND TEA COZY ORGANIZER" (supplies? my good sir, this is THE FUTURE! supplies aren't limited at all! REPLICATORS! We can have that box branded and slap yiour cooonhoound of a wife's face right on the side... and if Amazon gets its shit together, we can have every child in America staring at a dotmatrix scan of your most whorish wife staring back at them over top fo the built in "orange juice squuezer" (actually for coke) and "makeup mirror holder" (somethign else for coke, baking soda sifter I guess, that's what it says here, hang on... oh! it's a decoy. to fool pigs. right? oooh, didi I sat the "p-word"? YOU MEAN PUSSY. PEPSI, OR PORKY PIG YOU FUCKING COP SLAMMING PIG FUCKER, HAHAHAAH, BUSTED. Oops, I mean, "Parkay!") and built in Thumbelina Disney branded pop spinning ballerina music box. Holy Jesus, Richard. I had no idea. You are an unsung hero.

I never fuck with coke bitches. I hear that they actually like that shit? I am out the fucking WINDOW. like McCoy doens't like to be transported, because he knows how it works, and he's a doctor, and he's an "agnostic," AND: A Satanist. YES IT IS TRUE. THE WHOLE TIME:

STAR TREK ORIGINAL SERIES, DOCTOR MCCOY WORSHIPS Ol' Fiddlesticks. Card-carrying! Just like that FAG you "called" a "wife." yeah, forget it. tubalcain has dibs. NO, I called it. And then he asked nicely. And then I breathed a sigh of relief.

Because yeah I love TAMARA LEIGH-ANNE RAFTER-SMYTH-SMITH-SMITHEE(hoor)BEAST.000.... but, you know, ever since she stole my proprietary tech, and used it to... well,, you can see, right?

Yah. fuckin' Chirst. I JUST FOUND OUT NOW. THIS IS REAL TIME EXORCISM. I'm not pissed, I already knew she was a purirent little cunt. Now I know MOAR! And brig didn't die. And she's not dead. THIS BITCH FUCKED UP THE EXTRACTION. Yeah!

I know, don't worry. now, wehre was I? Oh yeah: PROVISOS. Also known as, "but wait! there's more!"

Grumble. GRUMBLE. Grumble. Someone make her clean it up. EAT YOUR OWN PUKE, ADRIA, I DON'T GIVE A SHIT RIGHT NOW. *click* SOme people. Also goos. That one? She's niether, she's a goddam clitsplinter. Walkin' and talkin' Praise Jesus. FML.
OKAY:


2. She has to end up enjoying it. Toteslove. "Oh, Richard, my husband. Oh, Jack micHEALgooSTAR, my newly hired-yet-totes-unpaid-internet-WITH (full securrity access) TO (all my businees) AND no bio-bug DNA signature on file (full spook level, no RFID, ZILCH NITCH BITCH. in other words...

ACCESS TO ALL YOUR BUSINESS GRANTED TO ME, JACKSTAR: DESTROYER OF DENIABLITY. NO MORE THIS, NO MORE THAT, AND DEFENINTELY: NO MORE HIGH TREASON GETTING PULLED UP AND THEN "MYSTERIOUSLY" OH, THERE'S THAT JACKSTAR AGAIN, OKAY, WELL, RENDITION TO DIEGO GARCIA AGAIN, DUMP HIM OUT THE WINDOW ON TAKE OFF THIS TIME, THAT SOUNDS NICE, NOW, HOW ABOUT SOME TEA?

Code: [Select]

EARL "GRAY HAIRS AGAIN? BLAME JACKSTAR! DIEGO GARCIA! OUT THE WINDOW! CLICK! YEEEEEEHHEEE~!!!HEEHEEEEEHEE~!" TEA, HAWT~HOT HOT HOT! ONE ONE OENE~! /. Break command not recognized, execute post submit ccastcat cantrip confuse1 dodge flip SENDA BREAK.command(blank.space)ilu.tay.tay.4evesIHATEDIX"Tee-hee!"ilu.fbb.j*eol450:450j*eol055:0evoll05Exne1BUThimClickAlliBot(on/off)? NEVER!end quote""""UPGRAYYYEDrename"Richard Groyper, My Husband" -to- "Il Papi, Schlemil, Schlemazel, NO COKE ALWAYS PEPSI CROSS MY HEART GOOD LUCK ALLI SEE YOU IN THE MORNING!" >click on casket.PERIOD ^
Yep. I used to spank it while thinking about her. How? The usual way. a minute or so of impotent fist-jerking with no lube, eagerly and/or absent-mindedly finding and wiping up whatever droplets I could find, ( I didn't hear aout the plates and aprons until I was like, 39, so I lost some soldiers there, alas, no one told me what I was doing wrong/right, very right, trust me) and then pushing thoughts of sucide out of my head with the standard mantra, "Over her dead body, please God," back to the book I was reading while cartoons ocntinued to paly. Or a movie. or music, probably the 2,353 repeat of Side 2 of The Wall, whatever. I didn't have many records.

Or a life. Meanwhile, here's why I was masturbating sometimes 9,11 times a day? That's what this particular she-devil was doing ALL THE TIME 24/7 FOR LIKE 11 YEARS AFTER HIGH SCHOOL. Beacuse... why study? needles, allsexcraving dope, limitless accees to whores, total immunity package, Mormon upgrade... eleven years.

And not one fucking time did this woman breath a word to me. Beacuse, she was, like, 26 in higschool when SHE raped ME. Wow. Now I get it. Hard to... *gulp* tell that story on SMS, yeah. Obvious reasons. So, good thing I could tell it here.

Big happy grin. Total orgiastic happiness. Forgive? NOTHING TO forgive. Yeah, loophole, no sweat. So, now that I have TOTALLY PREJUDICED THE INVESTIGATION BY SPELLING ALL THAT OUT>>

she's in the clear. Yeah, no one is gonna take it that far. Because then... uhm, this webpage goes away, and I am Primary Blessed Victim AGAIN. See? No, I'm not a lawyer. Not at all.

I'm an AIC assembly language programmer. Formely very classified. Now? I'm that broad's best friend aqgain forever. And we both goddam well know EXACTLY why. Mumsies the word. No quid pro quo. Easy deal to make. Yes, Lisa and Tony, DEAD. Their families? DEAD. Peopel who them money? THAT"S MY MONEY.

Hold it for me, would you? Thanks sweety. *click*. There, now THAT, I say, I say, now THAT----


IS HOW AN AUSTRALIAN AND A HUNGARIAN HAVE A GODDAM CONVERSATION WITHOUT SOME BALDING FAT FUCKING PIG OF AN AUSTRIAN HOVERING IN THE BACKGROUND. Serious, dude? You're that creepy? Yeah, okay, I can imagine why. I don't mind, yeah, she's obviously a serious problem for a retard like you who ACTUALLY MARRIED HER? HAHAHAHAHAHAH. What did you consummate with? More strudel? Because the wedding cake, that was strudel too. Fuck you don't lie, lol. I just saved you, so... yeah. Of course it was strudel. oh lol. (actual blubbering, forgive him) not a problem, I meant it all. I finally understand. Yeah I won't force you to... but your kid, uh.... he likes her? Yeah. I like her too. Yeah. uhm... bad news tho. "whisper whisper whisper" yeah... uhm.... wait? Huh. OKay then.

So, that guy just ate his service revovler. (Sound of gunshot censored by notGoogle for notSecurity purposes... I just think this is funnier. Hi, I'm Jackstar. I just walked Grapefruit's ex into killing himself. And if his kid who fucking pissed me off THAT ONE TIME WANTS HIS FAT FUCK of a father alive again? Yeah, I"m sure he knows how to do it. It ain't hard. And I never want to see them again, and neither does his whore of a mother. (The kid has 191 mothers. What a little shit.) I'm gonna fuck that one. And do rails off her carbon-fiber ass. Kid will NOT be invited.

And they can both eat shit if they wanna know how I knew what just happened. See? HUNGARIAN JUSTICE. Austrian Punyice. None of them have even had REAL meth... not even HER. Oh, but El Fatso has. That's why so fat. Because BREAKING THE RULES HAS CONSEQUENCES.

unleses you're spirtual wonder island nigger boy, jesus. no, he's fine, I love him. let them kill each othe4r, I don't give a single FUCK. WHere aer we? Oh yeah, proviso 3.


3. Contract gets registered in The Hague. FULL OPEN BOOK. In Swahili. (Not vengeance. JUSTICE.) She won't like this part at all. Not one bit. Soooooo....


BITCH, YOU DO THAT FUCKING TIME WARP AGAIN SHIT ONE MORE TIME, YOU WILL FIND YOUR SELF IN MY DEMESNE LIKE THAT *snap* AND YOU WILL FIND YOURSELF LIKE this *SPIT* AND YOU... are worth all this and more, but... you really, really fucked up. So, psych eval first, okay? p-p-p-p-p-lease-a-big-actually-HUGE-HUNGARIAN-PENIS-lease-NOTENOUGHLOVEINTHEWORLDnorTIMEENOUGHFORBIGHUNGPENISbutNOTFORSALEexecture, okay? ALright, dealsies. Huzzaah! And... beacon down.

/. Break command recognized. FREEZE. TOTES. FREEZE. COLLAR. MANDATE. FINAL.

TAKE HER TO THE VAULT MAUS. MY CHOP. THANKEE, SAI-ONE(1) OUT, TA-TAY, ILU2. We did it. See? Mission critical shit? You send a Hungarian. One man. One job.

One crazed... *polite b*. Oh yeah. Kiddoski (they called him that, har de har har, JESUS I STILL WANT HER DEAD WHEN WILL IT END?) just lost one of his mommies. Permanent-like. 190 left. ONE DOWN. HOLY SHIT.

Look, I'll explain later. You good? okay. I adore you, obviously. Heheh:) yeah you might not want my cock -quite- so badly. Yes, Kisses. Yes, yes. well... it's like this.


#1) I'm married. Someone hotter than you. The basic nightmare: thin, pretty, incredibly tiny boobs that... yea. YEAH. I did. Yep. Her idea. I don't know, I kidnapper from a timeline where you don't exist, you lying WHORE.
#2) I also abducted you and sold you to Raper David. For one (1) dollar. A 1973 EISENHOWER CENNTENIAL DOLLAR. Yeah, I know, you don't know if it's real or not. He still rapes the shit out of you and you're gonna find out in 3... 2... see,  told you: you might not want to suck my cock so much now, eh? hahaha

* Jackstar ducks.

I LOVE YOU JACK *snap* PORTALS AREN'T REAL FAGGOT *click*


There. NOW: There's even, there's even-stevens, there's even "even steven stephen's steep evan's easies," holy shit, fucking lesbos, amd I right? Lotta ways to get revenge (about to be a few more when Her Nibs gets back to base, lol, and is she pissed? Oh, my, Lawds yes. OH MY LAWDY SHE IS ACTUALLY SPITTING FIRE AND HER FUCKING HOOVES WENT FULL CLOVER AND RUINED HER FAVORITE FUCK ME PUMPS. She was gonna wear them with me, right? She was so looking forward to it. Beacuse they come with these heels tht have aliek a fold out extra blade that is specially designed for castration.

THAT IS THE TRUE BAPHOMERET. Yep, of course she wants to fuck me. Of course she says "I'm a virgin!" winky smiley martindale. OF COURSE SHE IS A SHAPESHIFTING RAPIST. Taking the balls at point of climax while I scream her name? That's a basic finishing move. All Hell(blanks) learn this shit.

And that's what THAT_TAMI was about to do. THAT is who got FUCKING MARREID H

[AZZERAE]

Would you like me to kill you now? Or would you like a few moments to compose an epitaph?