Perhaps I didn't make this clear: I don't give a fuck about being banned from Bellgab. You don't need me: you need my silent acquiesence to whatever you are doing, and as you can see, you don't have that. Take steps. Do something smart, dopeheads. Start with my google account, you dont' need it, I need my messages, I don't even knwo who you're talking to, and police are already invovled. Your manipulation of my life has gained you, whatever, but long term, I'm simply not going to value any of you now. You think you're teaching me a lesson? I taguht this to you. You bit off more than you can chew, and you are getting nothing from me.
And, now you've pissed me off too many times. Hey, guess what? I dont give a shit who you have to shove around to feel like a bigger person. Id like to get on with my actual life that doesn't invove being attached to any of you. I wasn't aware you thought you owned me, since I make my own decisoins, but I can see Ill have to make some changes.
Being associated with you is of low emphathetic value, especially now that i know why things weren't working. Each answered question leads to a basic ... Why?
Certainly hope more than just pissing me off. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get high AF and not care what you do. I don't and really never did want to associate with you, I just wondered why I wasn't: now I know, you're moron bull thugs. I won't drag you around to new people; you are an embarassment. Quit bothering me and fuck off, it amazes me there was something about what you have to offer me that is worthwhile.
I dont know what you think I did that justifies ar this time, but I will find out one day. Shoo. you can also tell your ridiculous person on the phone that I find her questions inane and asinine, and I think you forgot something here... I never came for her. And your obsession is flattery until it stagnates my life. You are an effect zero culture, largely beacuase you've spent a year manufacture fake shit so you can make "the big score." Also my phone keeps making notiifction sounds. with no notifaction. You could be more helpful. You didn't really think that I didn't see this day from thebeginning?
None of your opinions matter to me. You are theives. Your friends are reprehensible. You're vioeent and abusive and due to its exciting nature I cannot wait uuntil it is viewed by anyone....
Solid Snake: Sup.
Jackstar: Tada!
it relaxes me that I haven't figured everything out, that way, it doesn't mean the same thing to me when I am expected to be triggered.
did no one tell you? none of this is relevant, because no one can call the police--EVERYONE IS POLICE. The people who died--ALREADY REBORN IN YOUNGER BODIES. The cardboard cutouts being "busted" -- it's Saran Wrap. It's just layers of film.
Like the bomb at the end of the movie--stuck a fork in the clock, the ticking stops, and no one has to explode. But someone is exploding. And they are exploding at me. But this time I don't care about anything left of my "reputation" as I fully expect to get killed, or a new identity. My name is mud. Also, no one legitimately thinks I'm working with anyone. Because I am not. The DIvine is just that: Divine. Is anyone being faced wih a -real- problem?
Oh, well... some people found out some harsh truths, and discovered that there was exacty twice as many people involved as they might have thought, so what? Isn't it wonderful that you've all learned at wonderful lesson? isn't it grand that no one has to be concerned about their future? All this blackmail, all this struggle... what is there missing now that anyone thought they were going to be getting after anyway?
She would have had a great time--then she discovered that other peopel on other planets she had never heard of were miserable. She had to rescue her sister. She had to whore herself out to dozens of men. IT was so bad hanging out with me, well, it wasn't so fucking bad the first three years when she thought I knew nothing? I was watching complete idiocy. And now, that's over. She can go back to everything wonderful.
I guess, however, she can't go back to me, but why would she want to mooch off me? Why would anyone? No one has explained how you were all being convinced of anything, beyond jypnosis. "Must destroy Jack Schmear. Must destroy Jack Shchmear." Well, you did. I have no nothing and no one and just a house left behind with garbage and nowhere to go.
But on the bright side... there isnt' charges for major felony fraud being filed. Who cares that you all colluded with each other? You're all friends! It's all fun!
And you all got to laugh at me and say how terrible I am. Obviously I am not, but, that is alright as yuou were already willing to sacrifice me anyway, and now, it's simply happening without the corruptive influence. If I wanted to relax and tell any real friend about my life, that woudl be fine--no one is going to come after you all for trying to take my life, because that's not against the law.
It was never my life anyway. It was always yours. You defeneded yourself from loss. I never wanted to take everyones's stuff, but osomeoen else did, and now, they won't blame me for that. Ever again.
Also,. the real threats that were nueutralized, you dind't have to hear about them. What have you got left? Oh my goodnesss. SOme one freaekd out and their reaction outed themse;lves. Oh. Well. Everyone got the wrong idea anyway. There's no way you all figured out eveyrthing, because.. . Idn't know evyerthing.
Acting like it was the end orf the world and I am The King of Loathsome behavior. And yet... nothing I did, different from what you were all doing and stilld do.
I'm just not hiding anyhthing. And forcing a llook in the steady mirror. Would it have been better with peopel killed? Is everyone getting more harassingment? Well, it';s like this then:
Until I know what I'm going to be told to do, I can do nothing. Oh sure, I can risk eveyrone's life and safety. Why? Bad idea.
I don't know who calls me. I dont' know what anyone wants of me. And now hat I know who wanted to take from me, I see that it is a self solviing problem. Meanwhile, some dorks in texas rescued more women I used to know, and saved them from... you know, their trumped up bullshit charges.
I don't get why you don't all collectively tell thes ethugs to kick rocks, but, well, I suppose you have families and companion animals and cars and such.. that you don't want to lose. Well, I lost mine for you. Doesn't that sound nice?
I still do not not know what kind of leverage these people use--but I do know, that when I first encounted the Vampire Lord, he was a huge creepy weirdo. I have had to deal with him 4 times now. Okay, great! Now, what do you all deal with? I have no idea.
It is clearly very imprortant to keep me in the dark. Ooooh, just gaslit me and shut me off. Welll, I can see how orders from the top would do that. And why is that asecret, that's easy, it is because I know enough to annhilate your personal words with an orgy of slander and detruction, if I did to you, what all of you, did to me. But why woud I?
I wouldn't want to ruin anyone's birthday. In the meantime, everyone who relies on digitial communications with me for intelligence are failing. the phones barely work with me, the context is lacking, and whatever corrupt power grab was going to happen and then blamed on me, that is shut down. Isn't that great? Well, I donl't know.
I spent years knowing that those two were talking to each other behidn "my back" in violation of "court order." But was it really my business? I was the one wwith the fake relationsehip... t.aht they sold. I was the one who was trying to unjustly profit... which I turned off as soon as I found out..
And now, once again, I'll get around to paying off my debts and disappearing when I feel like, hopefully as soon as possible, because I don't know why anyone thought that they were going to get anythign done by more pressure--in fact, they maybe made it wait unti next Februarary 14. You know, that gal called this year. No one else. (Lines are jammed.) But no one know what thye knew then. Now I know what it sounds like when the person who used to torture my friend, sounds weak and scared. And, it wasn't even who aqny of you thought it was. He had eveyrone fooled.
and it's neen taken care of behind the sceenes. Is anyone being threatened still? Is anyone not going where they want? are phones still being blcoked? do people know who is real and who isn't? well, I doubt it... because Azzerae's podcast, that wasn't Azz, and there's some new voice I haven't heared, and... well, look the list egoes on of unanticipated side erfeects of the curtain being pulled back.
you are all one family, and none of you are iconveniencing each other much. and I paid for it. meanwhile you all mention I am doing something horrrible... which is what? well, not feeling guilty, for one thing.
The attorney "denedning" me used to be prosecturing me. THe former defense attrny, swtiched sides. nothing I did means anything before or after, because I was acting to defend my "family", just like she was. she has her family. she could call me, she does't want to, and you know what? I wouldn't want to be reminded etiher of how I walked around in circles for 5 years and then called the police on mysefl. But it's not like she destoryed the house and left a big mess or anything, or that she can't recover.
eveyrone can takecare of herir own problems first. I'll just wait. I had to resolve those lijngering quiestions, like, how was she getiting my email? Who was hacking my phone? Who was with who? Why all this concern about merth? Oh! OH!!!
Relax. It's only one, little itty-bitty Masonic sercret you let slip out, and then, it doesn't hurt that I figured it out, I Wasn't trying to learn any. (bad news otherwise.) so really, you're lucky, I helped you find a flaw in your system.
ANd then I burned your DEA to the ground. I don't know if it's already repaired, but, hhopefully you won't find your network of lodges used to TRAFFICK GUNS, CHILDREN, MONEY, DRUGS, YOU NAME IT, OH YEAH, AND YOU HAVE TELEPORTERS. Nice toys, Masons. I am sure you will use them for the bet from now on.
Maybe you can use some of this technology to call me a niggerfaggot a few more times an hour? WHo knows. Iit's enoughfor me to know that some of you must be jealouts as fuck, becasuse I am a cheap date, it looks ridiculous what I am doing--and, it is--but this isn't insanity. This is drramatic effect.
You watched me be hopeful to a person who reeaped the whrlwind, and the only people whing about it are a bunch of bitchie little girls. I don't even know what the problem is. I didn't cost them anything.
And no one really will ever know what it did to me. As an aadded bonus, in two weeks no one will remember the worst of it.
This great news. because usually high-level State-action like this is espiionage with a death penalty. And who cares if I would rather be dead than listen to any of you spin your stupid stories about me? "Strangeled her." That story only hurts her feelings if she doesn't know that only she knows what happend to the cat. I don't know. I odn't care. Cat weas a pain in the ass. WHat really matters is that she knows that she isn't a ddying old woman with chidren who mistreat her and are drug mules. NOw, they are... I don'tk now. /shryug. SOmething great, I am sure.
They don'ttalk t o me of cousre becasue that would look bad to whatever shouting thugs are still in power. I assume somoene else will figure that out. I mean, I 'm no good anumore without beiin gignorant, so... just fill in the gaps within someone else?
Just as soon as enough time has passes and all of you have moved on down the tapestry of life, I can safely, gently, start telling people who know me, what -really- happened, and they will be so greatful I did what ever I could. You all could have been in prison like that january 6 bullshit. In fact, that was the plan. No one told me about any of that while what's her face was filing false paper with the DEA--and I didn't care about anything once I saw her jump in a cab and get kidapped and all she could tell me as to why was "Google Analytics."
DEA deserves to burn to the fucking ground. They allowed humans to be profeitted from, the extact opposite of its' supposed purpose. All my life, I heard this bullshit: "It's just how it is, the drug companies have too much power;." WEll, not so much now.
Obviously someone is still seeing to pait me in a negative light, and really, Ican see why it's allpwed, it's ecause this is almsot over. And I am not worth investing time in. Why nother I'm not doing anything useful, like clearing a huge 3 bedroom house by myself, or talking care of the lawn, 4 acres myself, sure, and then, no one can gt through to me, unelesss they are "approved" friends. Well, I don't trust your spooky handlers, so I"ll just wait.
I guess it's too bad I don't get triggered vrery long when it happens, but hey, it just happned. I didn't think it would happen at all. Because whehter he did it in reality or not, he wanted me to bleieve it happened. And no matter how or who, you all followed someone who wanted to hate on me for reasons that you probably thought were real--and they weren't.
No one ever checked on that eitehr, so why bother worrying about it? Listen iisn't it better than you know that i twas all just an act, and that I'm just imagining how said I was going to be when you all find out the truth? Because I don't care what hapened... it was all make-believe.
Just like I could pretend any of you thought I was interesting enough to listen to. Truth is, I could give a shit about radio, I just did it becasue there was nothign else to do and every idea that shown to me was lame and nothign to do with evyrone that was really happening, which is obviously really cool. So, you all taught each other to use all that software and figured I'ld just... whatever?
Yeah, that's cool. Il'll pubish something else now, because, I like knowing that I did my part t okeep it form hpapening again: the seling out of our whole country and way of life by suppressing speeech and doing it trhough obsolute blackmail techniques. Honestly, I don't know how the threats of bankrupcy mean anythingl. What happens if you just dont' pay after some man who slanders you, wins a judgement? Is he gonna murder your fish?
And those two just moved to knew identities. They just wanted to get away from any possible chanvce to e exposed to me. that wouldn't do if I saw them a the prime of life, right?
I was going to leave already, but I had unaswered questions, and beause none of you could just tell the truth, I was curious. My ciriousity is diminishing. None of you have any interset in me, I'm not even able to use 3 of the sites, and the people who call me are revolting, bigotted douchebags. I am sure you thoguh ti was cute when it was "WRONG", but it really isn't. ANd what do you call care so much? Oh, right, that 's right, the elits, they have more sharing to do thatn us.
I politely asked what you were all doing and whatever it was, it invovled lying to me about what you were trying to do to me. I thought there was mutual aid. When I found there wasn't, I was done. I' am not your toy. I dind't stick around to beg for time from someone who lied to me so much they don't even remember when they are totesblown.
It's not even her. Its' a copy, beceause she "died" rather than talk to me out loudl.. that woudl be terrible. Or something. In anyevent, I don't need to, and I like the statement it makes. Simlilarly, I like the statement it made for me to disvoer that they were here the twhole time and I neeere tnticed. I don't usualy check evrery stranger for signs they are hiding htmeselves from me. I hadn't ajny idea a person would nbe so ahsamed of... I dont know. it's not my problem.
I am happy to testify any time any of you want. Sorry it's not gonna work out for getting soemthing for nothing, though. Mabye if you spent less time dribing around from one palce to aonter to just sit there? An idea.
The truth is that I never wanted to intrude on anything,l and, none of thiswas necessary, and I figured it all out and stopped you from making a horrible mistake for as long as possible. Then you found yourself having holy guardians asking you why I was public enemy nuber 1. well, I did that, and now, you can do it too.
And the people who were meant to be with me, who coulnd't find me because of your larcenous ways,they will grow old and alone witout firends and that should be fun for eveyrone. It certainly was for me, and, at last, it's a winding down.
You misook her DEA captor for me. I am not any government employee. I am a man who doesn't like to see citzens get pushed around. She asked for help with that, and she didn't want to say that she liked other people more, but it became apparent. Well, now I"m sitting that aside.
As well s the feelings i had before. I couldn't believe the shit I had to deal with. Im' getting screamed at.. but peopel stealing from each other. And claiming I was. That ws dumb. Did they really think that I was doing what they were doing? Oh, well, they deserved it.
Also, if they really wantedto do that kind of thing they coudl have, and did THey just didn't want me there. Well, now , ther's ehe wish, but thank fullly instead of shitting all over the webforever, it's a time saver. Relaly, it's wonderful news
I am watching the house deteriorate because it's the only way I have to show y utter contempt to forfeitture law. besides, I wanted to leave anyway. So it's really lke I'm in prison. But,;... it's a prison where I get to puff tough. and you get to watch, and you wouldnt like the real thing, yo.{
It gives a person a lot to think about. Sounds borinjg, right? Here, don't forget the band aid for soeone's nose, and, if you have any doubts about what being gaslit for 5 yeras is oike, it is that much, it is, one more time I hear a liar telling lies about me, well , I'm about done. ANd the outburst might get attnetion.
Certainly it pays attention where it is needed. And upon examnation of who is okay with more NO CONTACT and who isn't, well... I didn't even want to spend time with her. it was kust sarange being next to ANita again. At all. Becasue, she was never that bad,.
hShe was lied to aboutr it to. Your Masonic black and white checkboard shit is weaksauce. Look how easy it was to measure up... it only took my whole life, and then one false move, and just like that, Itook your whole planet.
You still have paris. Aren't there aspirijngs there? go get them. or mabye go wait under a brigde or somethigun for 3 hours. Not my problem.
}You don't need anything of what you thought yo uneeeded, I was just being nice and I coudn't imagine you had lied the whole time. Do you know what that means? They took advantage of me and you setn them to break my hand.
This is better than a ring up on it. and you were always meant to make me question msyelf. I have answered that question.
Now, go apologize to Whitely STreiber, and I'll get around to telling him the next parts of the story, because really, Bellgab, you're just one small part.
The breakaway civilaization is just that: away. And my friend who I havent had sex with in 13 years is just that: my friend. Tell ALlsion that while I could force the issue or blow drugs in her face, instead, I'm going to sleep happy knowing that you were so convinced I ahd, or waw gonna get framed. ANd I am not envious of their time spent togehter while lying about me to each other and hiding things from me forefver.
I guess you shoudl be hiding, and I uess I was a vulnerabiity. And I guess someoen shoudl have told me earlier,. by the way, I get rape threats now too, and I dont have a gang with me. So you've been fine too.
I have blown off as much of life as i can and hopefully by the time the court gerts around to doing whatever I will have an idea for somethign to do, because I am tied of failing to engage jy tue otential. I will go down with the ship, and I will jump up and down to push it further.
And then, when I am satisfied that I a m clear of any dangerous tails and i have washed my face and hadn at least once, maybe I will go to that reuinion. I can't wati to see who wants to ask first. "What happened?" Well, you are all a bunch of bigotted snooty shitheads, and you got addicted to mind control drugs and materialism, and didn't even notice. Now it can be enjoyed more.
I don't know what any of you ever thought I saw in the facade being presented. It was eventually obvious something was goingo on, and why dind't Graepfruit want me to know? Oh, right, they thought I couldn'lt be trusted. Lol. I am not your pet.
I am the light at the end of the tunnel, and I deserve what I get to do. Meanwhile, you deserve to sneer at me as if I am scarface. Beacuse thats helpful! So lowvibe. I can hardly wait. What I am uncertain of is why it isn't desirable to include something usfeul because eventually people will notice that you really were desrutctive to an opptunity. Well, I dint' want that to create much once I saw that yo uall were hoarding power.
There was time to focus and instead it was to humiliate. That distracted yourselves long enough that I contacted an anlien species and made firends with it. Cool. Do I want humans to be firends with me? Friendly-ish.
There was no reason to bother with anythign together when she started having sex with other people and taking drugs with them to make me "jeaslous." Big deal, go away. I don't need her attention. IT was enough to know that she was borijgn withotu me and some twerp was leiterally chasing down everyone I ever know. Great, buy them shoes too. meanwhile you're not doing anyhting but tearing everyone down. What does get built up? Oh, right, I haven[t tuned ijn at all.
I don't want anytijng to do with your societal manipulation and I hope you enjoy your new freedoms. I was never afraiad, and she was trafficked by thugs, like I said the whole time.
good thing she didn't get a disease from anyone. Also: p.s.: she pissed off a lot of people and she was willign to thrwo e to the wolves to cover her escape. hehe.
I am glad to know that the entire time it's been voodoos and I cured you all with Sourcery. I don't need to concern myself with any of you any more at all, and the riting i publice htat loks so terrible, well... hey, i don't maind a psyh eval. Sure, I look stupid. That makesDavid looks better.
I still don't know what happened. But Clayton found out, and ... didn't tell me. So fuck the whole of it. I knew I was being lied to , and now I know. Have fun, I don't need to be aronud all the time.
and I just wanted to playChess. but discovering that they werent going to be able to sue anone was amaiing. I thought she was some kind of a thing. She never semed streight up. I hope she and Wayne liked being drug mules. Maybe Ill drive her around next time and she can try to record me incriminating something. That must be fun for someone who hates a person whol.. waiit hwat? lol.
Baby steps. REPUTATION RESTORED. ENJOY YOURSELVES. I'LL PROBABLY WRITE YOUR BIOGRAPHY IN THE MORNING.
IT WAS WORTH IT ALL TO SEND MY AUNT CUNT TO HELL WITHOUT A DIME. PEACE
