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Radio & Podcasts / [DICKSTAR]: JAFR tested, JAFD approved
« on: May 02, 2022, 02:40:33 AM »Quote
Pro(v/b)ably adequate. Let us se(a/e).
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Pages: [1] 2
Pro(v/b)ably adequate. Let us se(a/e).
2
Esoterica / KNEEL BEFORE KOOTER
« on: May 01, 2022, 07:03:42 PM »
Hi. My name is Michael Jesus Clifford Kuczi-GOMEZ. (I know, sigh, obviously I would have preferred "Sue." Even -just- "Sue." lol) The story of how I got that particular name hung on me is one for a separate thread, and if I had my way about it, it'd be happening ten hojjiion doors down the line on the spacetime timeline superhighway.
Which, by the way, exists. And, before Jackstar, my name was Kooter.
Go on. Clap. Do it. No, really. I'll wait. Yes, not only did people call me Kooter, I actually introduced myself as such. No, really. REALLY.
I daresay not a one of you would have ever had the sack to pull that one off, amIrite? No, I'm just very, very clever about shielding my tactics from prying eye-balls. /shrug. Look, God made me this way, you wanna complain, you know what to do. (Calling me "a cunt" is a great place to start. No, really.)
Anyway, having established this historical fact (HELLO OMAHA, SHUT DOWN THE PROTECTION GRID, THIS ONE'S TOO COLD TO FRY WITH ALL THE HEAT COMING OFF THE ROAD RIGHT NOW. ABORT, ABORT, CANCEL HIS PARDON, HE DESERVES TO BE FUCKED TO DEATH--*skill-kill-sputch*), and, that's quite enough out of him, Jesus, what a Fed up Fed loser. Like, he really just lost, huh? Well.. did he actually -lose- anything this time? SAVE S/HE/IT.
More... after the break. (the rescue-a-bet expands. Greatflex.)
Which, by the way, exists. And, before Jackstar, my name was Kooter.
Go on. Clap. Do it. No, really. I'll wait. Yes, not only did people call me Kooter, I actually introduced myself as such. No, really. REALLY.
I daresay not a one of you would have ever had the sack to pull that one off, amIrite? No, I'm just very, very clever about shielding my tactics from prying eye-balls. /shrug. Look, God made me this way, you wanna complain, you know what to do. (Calling me "a cunt" is a great place to start. No, really.)
Anyway, having established this historical fact (HELLO OMAHA, SHUT DOWN THE PROTECTION GRID, THIS ONE'S TOO COLD TO FRY WITH ALL THE HEAT COMING OFF THE ROAD RIGHT NOW. ABORT, ABORT, CANCEL HIS PARDON, HE DESERVES TO BE FUCKED TO DEATH--*skill-kill-sputch*), and, that's quite enough out of him, Jesus, what a Fed up Fed loser. Like, he really just lost, huh? Well.. did he actually -lose- anything this time? SAVE S/HE/IT.
More... after the break. (the rescue-a-bet expands. Greatflex.)
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Opinion / The New Law Adventures & The Adm. Thereof Pacifist And Judo
« on: April 25, 2022, 08:11:13 PM »
I'm not going to lie. I am riveted to the seat. I am glued to the screen, my eyeballs are leaking out of my ears, this Johnny Depp shit is over the top good.
For me. I go to belgrab and I'm bland. Bland? How long has it been? I thought this would never happen again! I come here and it's crickets! I know what this means!
Seems like old times — one of you is getting the fuckin’ chair. (Obvious scattering when the refrigerator light comes on is obvious.) I got to work on my soundbite micro. Every second of this is comedy gold. This is what I was built for. This is what I was born for. This is what I was put here for.
It's my OJ Simpson window of opportunity/moment. And now that I am in position to seize power in the wake of the COVID Apocalypse... I'll probably just go back to bed.
Fuck your production values, C.–Witch.
For me. I go to belgrab and I'm bland. Bland? How long has it been? I thought this would never happen again! I come here and it's crickets! I know what this means!
Seems like old times — one of you is getting the fuckin’ chair. (Obvious scattering when the refrigerator light comes on is obvious.) I got to work on my soundbite micro. Every second of this is comedy gold. This is what I was built for. This is what I was born for. This is what I was put here for.
It's my OJ Simpson window of opportunity/moment. And now that I am in position to seize power in the wake of the COVID Apocalypse... I'll probably just go back to bed.
Fuck your production values, C.–Witch.
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Esoterica / totesbeyondbusted
« on: April 24, 2022, 01:59:19 AM »
I
Troopers, gather 'round. Yes, you, you in the back. Kudtdtle up. Get kozey. Didn't I say things were gonna go supercritical hypernuclear? I certainly did. I have a knack for prognosticating certain probabilities when they reach a tipping point of fuckin' inevitability. It's a bit like psychohistory from Asimov's Foundation novels. I always thought that sounded like balderdash, but here I am, piloting the course of my life by a teck that is mostly, but knat entirely, gobbleddy-gook & and fresh, country poppy-cock bullshit... nevertheless, it works. I know this, because it's how I got this far, and, land sakes! I ain't stoppin' now. These are The Blasted Lands. We can't stop here. All the plants are gonna die. Ferny McFernster might nevar recover. We don't want that. Not really. Not at all.
I also know this because I've been tinkering with the foundational technology that all this latest psycho bullshit is based on since the 90s. Yeah, I'm that guy. Stared at my navel a little too long, and, bickety-bam, just like that, I'm a Buddha. (Go Bears.) It's not all it's cracked up to be, but it ain't bad neither, I'm here to tell ya.
So anyway, people have beef. Strong beef. Wew lad(s)/lass(es)? Like, fuck this planet/globe. I swear galoshes. Land sakes! I've been told I can't say "just shoot me" anymore -- not in this autumnly ballistic climate -- nevertheless, I mention it one last time.
You had your chance to get close to me with bullets. Now, you're gonna have to use your (blank). Inorite.
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BellGab / CIARDELO, MONARCH OF THE SEWER, PIMP OF THE GAUSS, & ADEQUATE BUCKET GALVANIZER
« on: April 22, 2022, 03:08:15 AM »
I wanted to put "Womanizer" but it wouldn't fit.
And now... SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES!!!!!
*ominous music queued: CHECKMATE*
And now... SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES!!!!!
*ominous music queued: CHECKMATE*
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Esoterica / Jackstar Spoke In (Clas.) Today
« on: March 05, 2022, 04:35:10 AM »
Look, I'll get to work on this.
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Politics / Jackstar Is Single Again (was: "Re: Grapefruit was raped & murdered last night."
« on: July 07, 2021, 12:43:25 PM »
Just to keep it all in one place.
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Esoterica / The G-Files
« on: July 06, 2021, 05:01:29 AM »
The power of God is made manifest. Amen.
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BellGab / ★Gab: ENDGAME
« on: July 03, 2021, 04:40:01 PM »
On Sat, Jul 3, 2021 at 8:27 AM David Rubini <advertisingusa@hotmail.com> wrote:
Yeah, whatever, Loser. Send more lawsuits. Record more depositions. File more reports. Compose more email. Open more doorways. Kiss my ass. Lick my taint. Fuck right off. YOU ARE DONE.
Oh, really? What do you care? I'll let everyone know you're so concerned.
Only your ilk would care. "Are you recording this? I hear something. Do you hear that buzzing? Are you recording this? You're not recording this, are you?" hahaha, no, why, do you want a copy? hahahahahah AHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Wow, how did this power cord get cut? My cousin gave me that baby monitor. Now it's ruined. Beyond repair. How sad. Good thing I don't have a baby, I didn't have a baby, I've never had a baby, and if I did, how would I be able to monitor it now? That would be too bad, such a sad sad thing, to have an unmonitored baby. Sad! Good thing I wasn't using it for any such purpose at all whatsoever. Ever. Meanwhile, how did I ever possibly notice this occurence—a f****** AC power cord cut like, with a f****** magnet, how does that work?—and not mention that out loud to someone else? Gosh, I don't know... maybe it was another lone smoking gun.
The horror... the horror...
Good, she was a pain in the ass anyway; almost as bad as you. Have fun in court, Moron. Get out and push.
From: David Rubini <advertisingusa@hotmail.com>
Sent: Saturday, July 3, 2021 10:23 AM
To: Michael Kuczi <michaelkuczi@gmail.com>; A Law <x@x>; A Lotus <x@x>; Flyingmerkitty <x@x>; Keith Rowland <kr@rowlandnet.com>
Cc: Michael Kuczi <kuczi@unicorntoday.com>; John Wayne <batbrixxx@gmail.com>; kayntwhyle@gmail.com <kayntwhyle@gmail.com>; Jack Michaelson <jack@trioptimum.com>
Subject: Re: Not So Speedy, Made In Tie-Won (was: "Re: I’m Gone")
I'm sorry you're not happy with the outcome you've achieved. Since you put in so much legitimate work, I'm surprised.
Also, I fucked your wife, you obnoxious, mewling, drooling, weeping, lying, deceitful, tedious, machinating, dipshit cuck. Get to your shack where you belong, and take her asshole gang with you: the father, the other father, Wonderboy, the other other father, the dopemonger, fucking all of them, take a bow, Team: you sure fucking earned those sippy cups. Here, have a drink, it's from Bill.
Christ, it's gotta be said: "You're gonna need a bigger Shack." Put a sign out front that reads, "Crying Executive Producer Storage." Just to lead all the traffick to one place.
THAT'S WHERE YOU LIVE NOW. THAT'S WHERE YOU BELONG. THAT'S YOUR HOME. GO HOME.
#Legacy
Kudos. Welcome Home.
You will always have Ballgrab. I own these bad bitches from top to bottom (you may address me as Whoremonger Sourceror Roberts): they can't ignore the forking of my techno. I AM USING THE WORD CAN NOT HERE. I don't care who owns the hardware, who pays the bandwidth bill, or who makes snarky, snotty, shitty little comments: I know, you know, everyone knows. PEOPLE KNOW. How did that work out, eh? Pretty good, right? Remember, there's no such thing as bad publicity... FOR ME.
CHECKMATE. Did you consent to being mated? No? Well, that's why there's a Czech. Do I care? Sure. Do I care that I care? No. Not at all. Not really. You—all of you—will never forget how close to Me you got to get. How did you like your ride? I'm calling it "The Great Texas Twenty-Twenty Two-fer." I just like the sound of it. It's got a nice ring to it, and it has a good beat and I can dance to it.
So we're good. What are you still doing here? It's over. GO HOME.
--
Best wishes & warmest regards,
MCK
CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: The information contained in this ELECTRONIC MAIL transmission is confidential. It may also be subject to the attorney-client privilege or be privileged work product or proprietary information. This information is intended for the exclusive use of the addressee(s). If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any use, disclosure, dissemination, distribution (other than to the addressee(s)), copying or taking of any action because of this information is strictly prohibited. Trust the plan. #wwg1wga
Sent from my iPhone
Here's your patented Archlich hitchbiker kitsch floor mop. You're going to need this for your new janitorial career.
But if I had my way, I would just command her to shove it up your ass instead. And then...
Script the flip, & do the twist. LIKE WE DID LAST SUMMER.
LIKE WE DID IN JUNE, GERANIUM. END OF LINE.
At least... That's what The Mandate From Heaven was for.
JUNE. Sooooo... why was it... July?
THINK ABOUT IT.
Quote
Shoot up the butt and drink ur cum and do not lie or hit on me = CEASE N DESIST
Yeah, whatever, Loser. Send more lawsuits. Record more depositions. File more reports. Compose more email. Open more doorways. Kiss my ass. Lick my taint. Fuck right off. YOU ARE DONE.
Quote
= Quit using her as a prop for your gay show
Oh, really? What do you care? I'll let everyone know you're so concerned.
Quote
= demons in the phone
Only your ilk would care. "Are you recording this? I hear something. Do you hear that buzzing? Are you recording this? You're not recording this, are you?" hahaha, no, why, do you want a copy? hahahahahah AHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Wow, how did this power cord get cut? My cousin gave me that baby monitor. Now it's ruined. Beyond repair. How sad. Good thing I don't have a baby, I didn't have a baby, I've never had a baby, and if I did, how would I be able to monitor it now? That would be too bad, such a sad sad thing, to have an unmonitored baby. Sad! Good thing I wasn't using it for any such purpose at all whatsoever. Ever. Meanwhile, how did I ever possibly notice this occurence—a f****** AC power cord cut like, with a f****** magnet, how does that work?—and not mention that out loud to someone else? Gosh, I don't know... maybe it was another lone smoking gun.
The horror... the horror...
Quote
= i killed ur cat
Good, she was a pain in the ass anyway; almost as bad as you. Have fun in court, Moron. Get out and push.
From: David Rubini <advertisingusa@hotmail.com>
Sent: Saturday, July 3, 2021 10:23 AM
To: Michael Kuczi <michaelkuczi@gmail.com>; A Law <x@x>; A Lotus <x@x>; Flyingmerkitty <x@x>; Keith Rowland <kr@rowlandnet.com>
Cc: Michael Kuczi <kuczi@unicorntoday.com>; John Wayne <batbrixxx@gmail.com>; kayntwhyle@gmail.com <kayntwhyle@gmail.com>; Jack Michaelson <jack@trioptimum.com>
Subject: Re: Not So Speedy, Made In Tie-Won (was: "Re: I’m Gone")
Quote
Fuck Yeah!
I mean.. Fuck u
I'm sorry you're not happy with the outcome you've achieved. Since you put in so much legitimate work, I'm surprised.
Also, I fucked your wife, you obnoxious, mewling, drooling, weeping, lying, deceitful, tedious, machinating, dipshit cuck. Get to your shack where you belong, and take her asshole gang with you: the father, the other father, Wonderboy, the other other father, the dopemonger, fucking all of them, take a bow, Team: you sure fucking earned those sippy cups. Here, have a drink, it's from Bill.
Christ, it's gotta be said: "You're gonna need a bigger Shack." Put a sign out front that reads, "Crying Executive Producer Storage." Just to lead all the traffick to one place.
THAT'S WHERE YOU LIVE NOW. THAT'S WHERE YOU BELONG. THAT'S YOUR HOME. GO HOME.
#Legacy
Kudos. Welcome Home.
You will always have Ballgrab. I own these bad bitches from top to bottom (you may address me as Whoremonger Sourceror Roberts): they can't ignore the forking of my techno. I AM USING THE WORD CAN NOT HERE. I don't care who owns the hardware, who pays the bandwidth bill, or who makes snarky, snotty, shitty little comments: I know, you know, everyone knows. PEOPLE KNOW. How did that work out, eh? Pretty good, right? Remember, there's no such thing as bad publicity... FOR ME.
CHECKMATE. Did you consent to being mated? No? Well, that's why there's a Czech. Do I care? Sure. Do I care that I care? No. Not at all. Not really. You—all of you—will never forget how close to Me you got to get. How did you like your ride? I'm calling it "The Great Texas Twenty-Twenty Two-fer." I just like the sound of it. It's got a nice ring to it, and it has a good beat and I can dance to it.
So we're good. What are you still doing here? It's over. GO HOME.
--
Best wishes & warmest regards,
MCK
CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: The information contained in this ELECTRONIC MAIL transmission is confidential. It may also be subject to the attorney-client privilege or be privileged work product or proprietary information. This information is intended for the exclusive use of the addressee(s). If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any use, disclosure, dissemination, distribution (other than to the addressee(s)), copying or taking of any action because of this information is strictly prohibited. Trust the plan. #wwg1wga
Sent from my iPhone
Here's your patented Archlich hitchbiker kitsch floor mop. You're going to need this for your new janitorial career.
But if I had my way, I would just command her to shove it up your ass instead. And then...
Script the flip, & do the twist. LIKE WE DID LAST SUMMER.
LIKE WE DID IN JUNE, GERANIUM. END OF LINE.
At least... That's what The Mandate From Heaven was for.
JUNE. Sooooo... why was it... July?
THINK ABOUT IT.
12
Random / Soul-Affirming, Life-Changing, & Paradigm-Shattering Confessions of AzzGab
« on: June 25, 2021, 11:07:42 PM »
I'm going to start drinking again.
14
Esoterica / Jackstar’s Library of Cold Comfort Congress
« on: June 12, 2021, 03:30:51 AM »Code: [Select]
I blocked (PROTECTED) a few days ago and will continue to. Remember I said he is #Negative Energy.. Remember the 1st day we spoke (all 3 of us @ the same time) I said he would betray me.... blah blah blah...
He is gay or... BI rather.. he has sex w/ women... but desires men too apparently.. whether he actively has now or in the past... I don't really care.. but it makes me uncomfortable as he inappropriately has hinted at desiring homosexual activity w/ me.
Anyways, this is my last email. I now know that you really do in fact hate me and I have to accept it.
ByeWe are reaching levels of cope that should not even be possible. Why is there no mention of my involvement in Philippines child bride worship? As many of you know, U was instrumental in the instruction of at least two of Bell’s wives in various forms of linguistic excellence.
My niggas... what I am saying is that these Beings call for my help by Name. Can you blame them?
(Okay, well, sure, you can. Final answer? Cinder slaw.)
There will be more mail of all kinds here. Heads will rule.
Semper fu.
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Radio & Podcasts / MIBCDEFGHIJKLMOP ArchVision ALLIANCE Tee—Ayy Records H.W./O.J.I
« on: May 28, 2021, 02:03:04 AM »You want it.
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