5mwJ

[AZZERAE]

GOD WINS.

Oh yeah? What was up with all that "Hail Satan" shit then, buster? Did you even watch the Super Bowl, or were you too busy doing ritual sex magick in a darkened room? Dwarf people right? The whole shabang. Summoning the modern day Lam, I betcha. Today they call them angels and demons, tomorrow they well call them something else. When the Sons of God went to the daughters of humans and had children by them they were the heroes of old, men of renown. It is generally believed that the Emerther is the most important race not only of the Council but also amongst all known races. We have brought in the Antichrist. And your occult rituals and utilisation of drugs help you achieve this altered state of consciousness, which is why entities appear to you. That's why everyone else calls you crazy. Because they are out there driving to their jobs and standing at the water cooler, and thinking that greasy donut and that lousy coffee break is the most exciting part of their day.

Hunter S. Thompson had a very strict daily drink and drug routine. It went as follows:

Code: [Select]

3:00 p.m. rise

3:05 Chivas Regal with the morning papers, Dunhills

3:45 cocaine

3:50 another glass of Chivas, Dunhill

4:05 first cup of coffee, Dunhill

4:15 cocaine

4:16 orange juice, Dunhill

4:30 cocaine

4:54 cocaine

5:05 cocaine

5:11 coffee, Dunhills

5:30 more ice in the Chivas

5:45 cocaine, etc., etc.

6:00 grass to take the edge off the day

7:05 Woody Creek Tavern for lunch-Heineken, two margaritas, coleslaw, a taco salad, a double order of fried onion rings, carrot cake, ice cream, a bean fritter, Dunhills, another Heineken, cocaine, and for the ride home, a snow cone (a glass of shredded ice over which is poured three or four jig­gers of Chivas.)

9:00 starts snorting cocaine seriously

10:00 drops acid

11:00 Chartreuse, cocaine, grass

11:30 cocaine, etc, etc.

12:00 midnight, Hunter S. Thompson is ready to write

12:05-6:00 a.m. Chartreuse, cocaine, grass, Chivas, coffee, Heineken, clove cigarettes, grapefruit, Dunhills, orange juice, gin, continuous pornographic movies.

6:00 the hot tub-champagne, Dove Bars, fettuccine Alfredo

8:00 Halcyon

8:20 sleep

Can you do better? I know you can.

[AZZERAE]

I do not come in peace.

I want problems. I do not want peace.

[AZZERAE]

I don't think I even need a job.

I despise living on this planet of fascists. Actually, the universe itself is a fascist organism, and we are its chronically inflamed appendix: Vestigial, useless, noteworthy only for our ability to annoy. If cosmic antibodies are unable to combat our virulence, then, ultimately, we must be excised. Everything we believe and value is a lie, every law a deception, every ideal a hypocrisy, every abstraction a construct. We are not individuals, we are cells. We form aggregates called societies, which together form the spreading tumour of humankind. There can never truly be an individual because our survival inherently depends on others; without "mommy," we would all have died in infancy. Without social structures, man would have been extinct long ago, as we are the weakest link in the chain of life. We never recognise ourselves as components of a mass consciousness. A mind-boggling myriad of microorganisms is keeping us alive at this very moment, but we are not conscious of our precarious teetering on the brink of finality. Like most organisms, we function much like machines: Eating, shitting, fucking, and killing automatons.

[Jackstar]

https://youtu.be/25rEqqdZmOI?si=LfSFlPuIJP0VMjo4

We have brought in the Antichrist.

Toddler, you couldn't roll up a coloring book to bring it in out of the rain.

[AZZERAE]

Toddler, you couldn't roll up a coloring book to bring it in out of the rain.

Don't be jelly now. At least I can colour inside of the lines.

[WORTHAUGERa]

I can't confirm or deny what any of the names are, and I refuse to speculate any further. Suffice to say, yeah, I guess they all might know each other.



Or, they might not.
Jan 27, 9:24 PMMessage from you,
and will assume that I am until I hear otherwise. Valerie, Beth, Brittany, Kathleen, Jaime, Sara, I'm pretty sure you're on the wrong side of Heaven. Passage to either side is hereby: GRANTED.
Jan 27, 9:25 PMMessage from you, Saturday, January 27 2024, 9:25 PM.

I would suggest you think it over, especially if a dead person is reading this. (That can happen. I have had dead people looking out from behind my eyes before, so since lots of people read these messages now, I'm more aware of my grammar.
Jan 27, 9:51 PMMessage from you, without money or ID my travel is difficult. it's supposed to be impossible. where there is a will, there is a way., Saturday, January 27 2024, 9:51 PM.


February 19 2024, 4:27 PM.
i still don't have a debit card and I cannot get one until tomorrow and you are not being clear as to what you desire and y/our friend took my wallet
Mon 4:28 PMMessage from you, WHAT THE FUCK, Monday, February 19 2024, 4:28 PM.

Wed 8:20 PMMessage from you, Neg Bed Sea Tac Ass gay Ted yay L∞ Die Har Der, Wednesday, February 21 2024, 8:20 PM.


1:08 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 1:12 PM.

YOUR ASSAILANT -ONE OF THEM, AT LEAST- HAS BEEN NEUTRALIZED. (YOU'RE WELCOME, AND THE PLEASURE IS ALL MINE.) NOT BRIAN. I LOVE BRIAN! THE DUDE IS STACKED.

NOT BRIAN PALMER. A DIFFERENT. PALMER. BRIAN. TODAY IS TWIN PEAKS DAY.

WE'RE NOT GOING TO TALK FOR OR OVER JUDE-Ē. ALSO: YOU READ MY PHONE WITHOUT PERMISSIONS... AND YOU'RE STILL ALIVE. IMPRESSIVE.
1:19 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 1:19 PM.

Message from you, Alternatively, we all wait for Shane to kill her or himself, because that's what he is waiting for: a magical compulsion to unexpectedly drop in (spoiler: it won't) my mind's eye (supposed shields are holding and will forever) and wrench my gaze around to some Arbiter's Teacher’s Target. (Dear (PROT-KARR): you want her ashes? Come get them, çhe-which, The_Frogj‹roomer awaits thee and thine chatter from your bound chattel slave. Good luck.) Well, whatta ewe know. Bulls’ Ī? How about this: I launch The Shaæedæerow№±>I<°ⁿWORDSHAW Delivery Service, specializing in delivering ginger low-TīīT mid-tier ²HIGH¹KLAẞẞ⁵ Beck’, best.beastie.lee’s and, hands down; The Oversoul of Kevin Mitnick is the secret basement strategy here., Saturday, February 24 2024, 1:39 PM.

1:39 PMMessage from you, I captured his soul, like a genie in a bottle (“Boo!”), and instead of using him as a Duracell (“Hiss!”), I told him that I was gonna release him, and he was gonna be my security guy TOP OP, and if he ever failed me, I would give his littlest sister an immaculately conceived MOON LOVES CHILD OLD GIRLS + ANY PARENTAL GUARDIAN WHO WANTS THEIR MEWLIN’ & SQUALLIN’ FERRY.PRINCESS... RIDDEN IN WET AND PUT AWAY HARD. DON'T THINK I CAN'T DO IT, BUT AN IMMACULATE CONCEPTION FORCED RAPE BABY IS MORE SIGNIFICANT IN EFFECT WITH ITS GRAVITAS. DOUGH DONUT DO MI DO ME DO mE... JANE-Ē HAS GOT A GUN., Saturday, February 24 2024, 1:39 PM.

Message from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 1:59 PM.
CHECK AND MATE.
KMM: WHISTLE DIXIE.
BJ¿: WISHED FOR DEATH.

BECAUSE PISCES. NOT BECAUSE ME. AND NEPTUNE, RULER OF THE SEAS, FORBIDS OUR UNION.

WELL, THAT'S THAT THEN. (PROT-|/|/): START TEACHING COOKING, OR START SUCKIN’ MY TEACHINGS DOWN, DOWN, DOWN.

(DOGGEREL. WHAT'S THE OPPOSITE OF A NIGGER?)
Message from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 1:59 PM.
ANSWER: BOOKS. THE WORD ONLY HAS THE POWER THAT THE NORTH AMERICAN MIKEY•BAY•LORE•STONE•LEE❄️brrr!❄️SEANET CHILLAX EW WWW, A. GRö§ Query...

“What's it like to forget to ask The_Quincunx for a job? Hi hi hi, ho ho ho, sky high eye, five dozen thick fire Styx & sticks w/dicks in ten thousand maniacal pussies, yep, this is my job now... pretending to be afraid of two old maid’s Q•Bert arcade machines and a double-quarter-pounder with cheese.

PAYCHECK? RU SERIOUS?
LADY, YOU ARE NOT EVEN AT THE HANDSHAKE WHILE HANDCUFFED STAGE. I DON'T GET PAID.
1:59 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 1:59 PM.

I DID MANAGE TO STOP THE INTER-DIMENSIONAL INVASION OF OUR HOME PLANET, YOU SUPER SERIOUS TOP-TIER TODDLER... YES, THEY WOULD HAVE HUNG US ALL IF THEY KNEW WHAT I KNOW AND COULD PROVE IT IN A COURT OF LAW. (NO COURT OFFICIALS WOULD PARTICIPATE. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN UNHEARD OF.)

SO: THEY TOOK THE DEAL. SILLY DEA. NO DEALS MEANT JUST THAT. KNOW THAT I KNOWWITH WHOM DEA CONTRACTS WITH NOW IN THE SPIRITUAL HEIRARCHY OF ANGELS.

NOT GOING ON MY C.V. THOUGH. THESE THINGS HAVE TO BE DONE IN A PARTICULAR ORDER, HOWEVER.
2:01 PMMessage from you,
 Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:01 PM.

AND FOR SURE: THAT GODDAM BATTLE ANGEL IS MINE. JUST BET ME. YOU JUST WAIT, PUNYLINGS.
Message from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:10 PM.
Because we are, were, and always will be Our Perfect Score. How you like me now, Ol’ Yeller?

You wanna have a tea party on the lawn? HI HI HI. NOW THEY OFF THE RAPIST RIGHT IN FRONT OF WITNESSES? TIME for a SPECIAL ADDED CHARGE OF “Lying in wait.”

BECAUSE HE DID.
2:10 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:10 PM.

AND I CAN HANDLE THIS THE_ONE (1). THE REST OF YOU: FIGURE IT OUT WHILE I CHASE DOWN THE GHOSTS OF YOUR FAMILY I MURDERED, CHASING THEM DOWN AND RIDING THEM TO DEATH, OVER AND OVER AGAIN... FOR ALL ETERNITY. HUZZAH!

OH, WAIT, MY BAD: WRONG SCRIPT, WRONG 3×4 INDEX CARD, AND WRONG, WRONG RING HONG KONG, TELL THEM YOU REMEMBER WHEN THE PLACE WAS CALLED TAIPEI, AND THAT JACKSTAR, DESTROYER OF DREAMS... NEEDS HELP TO MAKE HIS COME TRUE.

(Note: DO NOT
D
m
W
. THISnow)
Message from you,  Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:23 PM.
So, there. There mote it be. Want Soupy? Get SOUP’d. Did you bother to check for validity?

How long did it take you to open the door? Do you even remember? Okay, great. *hands clapping in math* Found the ones no one else could save.

I saved them.
.I.AM.THE_FAILSAFE.

And I rescued many others as well. YOU WILL ALSO: NEVER FIND ANYONE IN A MILLION FUCKING YEARS.
2:23 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:23 PM.

DO YOU GET THE PICTURE? DEA JUST RAN ITSELF OUT OF A MULTIPLE BILLION DOLLAR BLACK OPS BUDGET WHILE TRYING TO SURRENDER TO A PITCHER PLANT NAMED KEN-ē-ZKaN.

HOW DID THEY RUN OUT OF MONEY? SIMPLE: NO ONE REPORTED THE CRIME, I WAS NEVER A WITNESS TO ANY POST OF THE CONSPIRACY, I DIDN'T REPEAT OUR CONVERSATION, AND I WAS NEVER REALLY HERE OR THERE, SO...

HOW DOES YOUR STALKER AND HIS FOUR THUGS -ALL WITH COMPLETE, AUTHENTIC īD- EXPLAIN THAT? TO WHO? WHY, TO ME, OF COURSE.

BECAUSE AT LEAST TWO (2) OF THEM NAMED ME AS THEIR AS SPIRITUAL COUNSELOR AND GU RU GUIDE. (Flattered!) THE THUGGY-PIGGY MACHINE DID THE MOST OBVIOUS THING IN THE WORLD IN RESPONSE.

CARE TO KNOW WHAT IT WAS?
2:25 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:25 PM.

They were driving to my house, pulled over along the way, and never heard from again. This was a year and a half ago.
2:30 PMMessage from you, 🅿️✝️Ⓜ️🅿️: CONCURS., Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:30 PM.

Tough love. Nasty, awful business. It's been addressed. By Future Me in your past, K?

KD died for you. Sure she came back. She would have preferred another outcome. But she apparently felt that no other outcome would ram the points home.

🅿️✝️Ⓜ️🅿️: CONCURS.
2:35 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:35 PM.

Also, she didn't really want to take five years to have sex again. Who told her that was responsible upbringing and demonstrated efficacy? Because I never told her ANYthing.

Including: why it was taking so long. (Age of consent laws are known to vary widely. Also: NINETEEN.)

WHO WANTS TO KNOW?
AND... MONEY, NAGA
.. what?
2:42 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:42 PM.

Long story short: it's a jungle out there, especially at Christmas Time, and if you're gonna file for anything, please don't do it “on BEHALF of” because that opens one's employer to SIGNIFICANT TAX PENALITIES AND LIABILITIES.

And... THAT really is ONE (1) OF Mine. Areas. Of concern. See? Is legit.

And now, for my next trick... I can sue someone, and fuck them, and not have to *get away* with anything.

In other words: MILITARY.INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX: B.T.F.O. (Oh, you're welcome.) Any questions?
2:50 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:50 PM.

Yes, you, you in the back with two of them, can you ... great.

“why me?” that's easy. The last two viable candidates formed a mutual non-aggression pact. (Complex treaty/plunder negotiable rights are my speciality.) Bottom line is this: as long as I don't rape anyone to actual,_death... I can seduce anyone I want, forever.

.AND.YOU.BOLD.NUGGET.COMBING.KLANDOE.HORSEHUSBANDS.ARE.FIRST.PRIZE.C0-WINNERS.(You may share one (1) Cadillac.)

Now. See? That was easy. For you.
2:52 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:52 PM.

Well, call me then. Oh, would you lose your job then? Cool. Make it snappy, you're burning daylight, Darling Starlings.
2:53 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:53 PM.

I'll call when I goddam feel like it, and yeah, it would be nice if I were there, right? Nevertheless I chose Not_Prison.
2:59 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 2:59 PM.

We have been touched by love, and we were meant to be forevers changed. Do what thou willt hath; been The Loophole in The Wormlaw. Love demands its own style of closure: hung, angry man-sized babyangrylove.

That's the one. I don't care what is thought: I made another choice as well, and nevertheless I have returned to... two insanely hot women and a haunted pizza oven that identifies as a; cursed refrigerator.

And I don't have a thing to wear. Frick!
3:02 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 3:02 PM.

I didn't believe it either, but I'm convinced. I get (blank) &AND milk. Okay. Is that good? “New High Score”, omg! Did I break it? Why are those klaxons going off?AWOOO-gah-№tJustGah!
3:07 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 3:07 PM.

This is why I don't have your address. I don't want to know it until the quantum entanglement T¥ĪVĪËKRμ,§ĪæLlΠ∆\/īKTŒIÅRy—reeēEEĒ *🥏⛎🥏🪡
3:14 PMMessage from you, Saturday, February 24 2024, 3:14 PM.

You bet your sweet ass I'm gonna buy you a phone(s). YOUR MONEY. YOUR PHONE.

‘MUH īOS-ENABLED 25# (PROFANE|body_part). Take your pick... ¡I|/|/!All!§⁰ⁿ, Francis—and lighten up the Beav, okay? Because your daughter just prayed to Almighty God for a miracle.

*poof* Ain't no coming back from that one, Demander. ☮️shalom☮️

[WORTHAUGERa]

Don't be jelly now.

I don't even have time for jam.

[Master Trollda]

I don't even have time for jam.

But you do have time to post the above scrollfest?! 

[AZZERAE]

But you do have time to post the above scrollfest?! 

Do you want him to go away?

[Master Trollda]

Do you want him to go away?

No. I just wish he wasn’t so enamoured with himself that he can’t interact with others the way he used to. It was more fun. Now he posts like a cult leader in love with the smell of his own farts. Is  anyone actually reading these posts and taking them seriously?

[WORTHAUGERa]

But you do have time to post the above scrollfest?! 

It took longer to edit it than it did to text it. It is not meant to be accessible to everyone.

It is meant to be seen. Why you thought it such a big deal, is a mystery to all, even to myself--I decline to speculate as to anyone's reasons why, least of all, yours. You can just tell me, of course. In public? In "private" messaage? As you like.

I don't think you understand the reality that I am facing here. Where's my wallet? Where are my friends? What happened to them all?


I HAVE BEEN IN A MEDICALLY INDUCED COMA FOR 12 YEARS (posited theory), ASSHOLE (you really could be more considerate to others)!!!!!! (1)!

[WORTHAUGERa]

No. I just wish he wasn’t so enamoured with himself that he can’t interact with others the way he used to.

I called my friend last night and you answered the phone, then you stumbled along for a few seconds, and then you hung up. HOW AM I TO BLAME FOR THIS?

It was more fun.

For you.

Now he posts like a cult leader in love with the smell of his own farts.

Maybe you don't know who I am. Maybe you don't know what has happened to the phones. Maybe you think you're unmarried and you're not. MAYBE YOU DON'T KNOW JACK OR SHIT ABOUT REAL LIFE.

Is  anyone actually reading these posts and taking them seriously?

MAYBE. *swings gavel, stamps* You're free to go. FY, post on EG, post here... You know. Whatever TF it is you ewe do-dew.

[AZZERAE]

Is  anyone actually reading these posts and taking them seriously?

I can't say who else is reading them, but I know I am. As for taking them seriously? Eh...

[Master Trollda]

It took longer to edit it than it did to text it. It is not meant to be accessible to everyone.

It is meant to be seen. Why you thought it such a big deal, is a mystery to all, even to myself--I decline to speculate as to anyone's reasons why, least of all, yours. You can just tell me, of course. In public? In "private" messaage? As you like.

I don't think you understand the reality that I am facing here. Where's my wallet? Where are my friends? What happened to them all?


I HAVE BEEN IN A MEDICALLY INDUCED COMA FOR 12 YEARS (posited theory), ASSHOLE (you really could be more considerate to others)!!!!!! (1)!

I suppose the coma causes the center of the universe syndrome. 

Look, I don’t care about your friends or your phones. Now, entertain me or get out!

[Master Trollda]

I can't say who else is reading them, but I know I am. As for taking them seriously? Eh...

And they actually make sense to you?