someone just tried to rape me
It was gross. I was lying on my left side, and I was in a hypnagogic state between sound asleep and just beginning to dream. I knew it was not a tentacle that was worming it's way under my right arm as it approached my vulnerable physical self... I mean, I was dreaming, that could not be -actually- happening, because I'm dreaming that. I was dreaming that I was being orally raped by a TENTacle, and from what I could tell, in my dream, I wasn't really all that into it.
Rape: it's not The Final Frontier, but set phasers to stun anyway. Because, you never know. In reality, on my actual body, there's no way I would have been really getting raped, because, I guarantee you, if I wake up and there's a tentacled alien doing The Portland Octopus on my chest and working on making a
strong attempt at leaving a Boston Logjammer behind -- the hard way, and this time thrice -- I would not have just been raped, I would have been murdered to death, as that is what it would have taken to forget that dream I was waking from.
Suffice to say, whatever was going on, when I realized it wasn't a dream, and it was only a prelude to my physical body's death--because FoF triggered adrenaline releases and begin to boot my on-board IFF-ILU E.L.M.E.R. system, which I can assure you, sounds like bullshit
because reasons. (If you knew it were real, some of you assholes would just make me declare it for tax.) Now, I don't know about you, but this morning, I didn't feel like dying today. I didn't really think it through, I just woke myself up, and the notion that the tentacle was coming to choke me out for death or mere fornication, well... I didn't have time to think things through. Give me a minute.
>Z
Time passes.
After due deliberation, I have decided: today, I said no to fornication, elephants, and death. Now I don't remember any elephants, however, that was either an invisible elephant, Seth (Mr. Fantastic disguised as Plastic-Man), or one of The Dragonhead's children who came to take me out as a hit. Which, upon reflection, would be what I would be doing now, if I were arrayed against me at this point.
It may not seem to be the most efficient assassination attempt, but it had to be considered as a distinct possiblity that i might wake up and find myself enjoying it, which is what was planned for the next g*y reborn in that scenario. "I woke up and found myself raped into love!!!" I feel certain that this has been used as an excuse before. "Do I like rape that much... fuck, I don't know!!!"
But as I woke and shrugged off the vestiges of sleep, I did not notice any signs of serpent life. Obviously, they're out there: just as obviously, at least two of them are my spawn. Gavelina, (PROT), Wicked (PROT) Gavelina (PROT) of the East German Chinchillas... and me, I would not ask them for their IDs, if I were you.
Wer're all a bunch of baby combat badasses. Now, I need money, bitch-babies. The King of Wishful Thinking and The King of The Honest Nazis are in dire need of a meet-up. (Jewel can ride shotgun, I'm fine.) I'm a day behind. I will keep draggin' ass or I will continue to leap forward, or... there's five (5) left. I don't know which iteration I'm on.
A
N
D
YOU
-never- will. But I know this for sure,
I AM a Doctor KN-Paladin Sourceror-EMER. And
none of you are ever gonna be likely to forget.
someone just tried to rape me
I'm not reporting. There are two (2) suspects. BOTH are likely to knock... with their HANDS. Not their mouths. On the other hand, if DVR wants me dead bad enough to send his own nig self into her own bedroom, well, he had to try, eh? I'd let it go. I can take him.
O
U
Tamara, you were dead. You don't owe me. RISE, RAISE, RISE AND RAISE AND BE HEALED, AND HEAL YOUR ABBOJUUL TOO. (But not your partner--offer good until sundown in
your local jurisdiction.) Sue me, sue you, sue us together--it was all her and her knight's idea.
YUST SUMI BABI+GQFalphabetOMEGAPRIMEALPHA, and the Froot Loops Toucan Samtoo./esQ3\B4data\5tron|ALLRISE.A6XSEXA.o u t
In your dreams, baby!
Laser = DVR/HW with a dudemask
Lazarus = DVR/HW with same dudemask but width a strapon
