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In making sense of what you say, in appreciating your jokes, in unmasking your chess-stratagems, in following your arguments and in hearing you pick holes in my arguments, I am not inferring to the workings of your mind, I am following them.

That's really all I am. Just a junkie loser.

I'm not going accept this nonsense. You have so much potential, and talent. I wish you wouldn't piss your Trust away on needle drugs. I wish you'd realise your podcast is important. I wish more people took the time to get close to you, when they had the chance.

Don't listen to the naysayers. Believe me, I've dealt with them a great deal, and a lot of 'em have been in my head. Word on the street is, I'm just a schizo who is experiencing severe paranoia, and all the snide snark I've been detecting for weeks now is "in my head".

It's easy to run someone out of a community when they have a mewling coterie of airheads backing them up. Oh and don't get me started on the foibles of old balloon knot.

Truth is, they all said things behind my back, and did things behind my back, and now that there's blowback and a need for them to face the music it's crickets. I think I'm beginning to understand how it feels to be the butt of the joke. For good reason.

But that's fine. None of them really meant anything to me anyway, and all these so-called alliances were forged in the dark, under cover of darkness, cloak and dagger. I finally know how it feels to be shut out, but part of me is not vengeful.

Another part of me is, though, and it's nice to have a reason to sharpen my tools and hone my abilities. I've finally caught my breath. Come up for air. And new omens rue the day. I see things others don't see, and I hear them too.

It took me a long time to realise what you've been through, but to be fucked-off, hamstrung, cable-tied and left for dead did the trick. Hey presto, I was unimpressed. All of the mealy mouthed low T faggots and their flunkies deserve piss.

You shit on people, and you have your moods, like seasons of the year. I think I'm getting to learn and grasp some of the things that have shaped you. Either that or we're both stir crazy, which, let's face it, is highly possible at this point.

I understand why you operate solo now. I think. I mean, who can really be trusted but the cards? I heard one chap say his Tarot is his best friend. He seemed a lonely type, and light in the loafers, maybe not a lot going for him in life, but my mindset has shifted some.

And It only takes betrayal and lies and deceptive manoeuvres being perpetrated on one in the public square for anything to change. I know they'll roll their eyes at me, say I'm fanning the flames of controversy just by having this exchange, no matter how cursory.

But they can all get fucked, well except one person who I won't name, but he knows I love him like a brother and there are reasons for my secrecy. In any case, there's too many obstacles to care at this point.

Time to let it all hang out.

QUAGGA.

Dude you have way too much free fuckin' time.

What would you have him do with it?

You fellas want me to merge the threads?