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Radio & Podcasts / 5mwJ — 19Oct2025 — Awkward Bizarre Content Distribution Era, fuck Grapefruit, he
« Last post by Jackstar on October 20, 2025, 10:10:41 AM »ll I Jackstar killing little men, neighbors, or prick’s questions, really smooth-ish, terrorist umbrella versions X, why zebras? Well, quagga would be too obvious. And also: my feelings are hurt. Taking my gear is supposed to be for my own good, is that supposed to be plausible? I don't think it is.
90 day cooldown. SIMULTANEOUS. That's the protocol. And I have demonstrated sufficient probable cause. At least, in my view. I don't know what any of you have demonstrated. Because my communications are blocked. Like in Diamonds Are Forever. Like in reality, what was done to Howard Hughes. It's amazing what can be done with modern tradecraft. And it's going to be totally fucking awesome watching you turkeys testify to Congress about it.
Another Iran-Contra? It's more likely than one might think. ASSES IN SEATS FOR MONTHS. Think of the Neilsen R ratings! IDK if they even still have those. NEVERTHELESS: think of them! BUY MY CUM &AND!!! (Just kidding. I'm not selling my baby batter.) And in spite of the opportunities available to leverage this oncoming tide, I am still The target of... I have no idea, really, but holy shit are they pissed. C’est moi? Big time. I might even have my senior prom tickets revoked, to say nothing of my guild charter. (I don't have a guild, but that doesn't matter, Dean Worm Her and all his ilk are literally frothing at the mouth. Over one schizo junkie. Yep, that's me!) I am, of course, very ashamed.
Because I am not even close to being sorry about my lack of good manners at all. Holy fuck, you assholes fucked everything up, and somehow it's all my fault. Wow! Well, that's what a raging drug addiction and the total denial of it will do to an otherwise well-oiled machine of brutal oppression. (Bellgab, I love you.) How did anyone not see this coming? Oh, I suppose they did... and then, neatly sidestepped the oncoming D5 avalanche.
Bigger than you can imagine. BIBLICAL. Clearly, more petty theft is a safe move, lol. WRONG.
But I suppose you all have to eat. (Income streams drying up? Maybe going door-to-door pushing solar panels is going to be your ticket out of poverty.) And I suppose I look like a juicy target still. I am quite plump, after all. And, I'm just begging to be bullied for lunch money, right? Omfg, it's like face blindness.
Everybody out of the pool. Actual: time to hustle. Site statistics: down from 1165 to ~33. Talk about leaving money on the table.
Remember: I'm just a needle junkie with HIV. Right? That's certainly what I heard. And I haven't heard of any retraction, explanation, or feelings of contrition.
You know what might help? Put on a French maid outfit and clean my fucking kitchen, you silly twatsplat mewling coterie of bī-bully ho-thugs. What are you, busy? Maybe you're held up in Customs, or something. I really have no idea.
Because I got high? No... because I really don't give a fuck. This is your message, Bellgab. FIX. CLEAN. POLISH. Do I have to be the goddam instructor? Y'all fucked up. Now, take accountability. Sure, you never had to before. IDC. Learn as you go. No one is getting any younger, you know.
And if you don't like it, I'm not surprised. It's not really very fair.
NONETHELESS: IT IS THE LAW. (Standards.) You're welcome.
I'm gonna go pretend to want to fap now. Because that's one of my jobs: pretending to be a frustrated sex addict.
Wye. That's why. Now scram, Friend. I'm sorry if I seem too brutal.
That's the training. (Also: you owe me a refrigeration unit and a written apology.) I'm not really enjoying all this surplus of human suffering.
Hey, I stayed out of your DMs, right? CAPIÇHE? I'm practically beatifiable. Without even ever having tried to be.
And, I love you. So, I'd rather see you all turn yourselves around on your own recognizance. And if it's just too hard, zI happen to know of a quality behavioral hospital you can all plop your asses down into. I'm sure all of all y'all would feel right at home.
(Vengeance for Shakena Godbolt.)
And, I don't know that that woman has got going on, but I called her for her email address and she acted like I was some kind of reprobate deviant. Like, damn. Tough crowd. Maybe I didn't belong there?
Maybe they shouldn't have stolen my gear? Maybe they shouldn't have assumed that I was an abject retard? Well, mistakes are how we learn. And, you know how kids are. They think they invented everything.
And they think I'm old. I'm at ⅒ of my expected lifespan. That would be ten years old, if I was gonna live to be 100. How long could I really live, though? 🤔 At this point, what difference does it actually make?
I retract the question. Do I really need to know? I doubt it. Similarly did I really need to lose my boots, my kilt, y flashlight, my... everything? Well, someone sure thought so and Shakena Godbolt was so disturbed, she hollered and shrieked at me on her HIPPA-compliant business telephone line.
Huh. I don't know if that's a cry for help, or if she finally figured out that she was totes screwed; but the fact of the matter is that I am the victim of a targeted scheme to get me “out of the way.” Is this going to go on much longer? It's tedious to endure.
Asking for a friend. To arrange for any necessary intervention. Because, gosh! I'd like to be eb getting on with my life, and I don't really mind if any of you think I'm not allowed to. I don't need any of you to allow me to live.
I simply and masterfully do so. Get the picture? Now, start signing checks, Cartoonist Twatmunch. What, are you sitting there with Girl Blofeld training a pistol on you? Awkward. Funny image, but decidedly awkward.
I'll leave you to your struggles. I am sure they are real. And the next time you want to score some low-hanging fruit, think again.
MY CAPACITY FOR INDULGING YOUR RIDICULOUSNESS HAS BEEN EXCEEDED.
And, still: no hugs Weird. I don't think your Ringleader thought all this through. No plan B, right? Because I'm a needle junkie with AIDS. Oh, wait.
Nope, that's the other one An easy mistake to make, I guess. I'm new around here. Not really sure how things work.
But you do: sow, I don't have to. I choose to work And, I don't work FOR YOU, BELLGAB.
That's the training. We'll see how things are next month. For now .. face reality.
PEOPLE >KNOW. I have no idea what they know, but they sure do know it.
And they know that I have sat your thuggy-bulky Oinkerton-fed D. E. A. ± D. A. R. E asses down. Good. Someone had to. Now, go be effective. Because, after all.. public monies taken equates to being held accountable to various and sundry duties as guardians of the public’s trust.
tl:dr; you wish you could just suck my fat one and get this over with, I'm sure. Well, well, well, it's too late for that and I wasn't interested anyway. Try another strategy. Mix things up a little. Like, I don't know... how about you sober up for a while? You might like it.
I certainly did. I certainly will again. And if my consumption of entheogenic compounds were any of your fucking business, Bellgab.. then business would be booming. Just imagine it: a life without the constant feeling of impending DOOM.
That's what you lost by trifling with me. Because I could be more subtle. More soft touch I could also flip the fuck out. Would anyone notice? I DOUBT IT.
I have chosen the path less traveled, Bellgab. Without being at all obvious about it. Oh, you're welcome.
Good talk You work; so I don't have to. Tarbaby owe ewe T
90 day cooldown. SIMULTANEOUS. That's the protocol. And I have demonstrated sufficient probable cause. At least, in my view. I don't know what any of you have demonstrated. Because my communications are blocked. Like in Diamonds Are Forever. Like in reality, what was done to Howard Hughes. It's amazing what can be done with modern tradecraft. And it's going to be totally fucking awesome watching you turkeys testify to Congress about it.
Another Iran-Contra? It's more likely than one might think. ASSES IN SEATS FOR MONTHS. Think of the Neilsen R ratings! IDK if they even still have those. NEVERTHELESS: think of them! BUY MY CUM &AND!!! (Just kidding. I'm not selling my baby batter.) And in spite of the opportunities available to leverage this oncoming tide, I am still The target of... I have no idea, really, but holy shit are they pissed. C’est moi? Big time. I might even have my senior prom tickets revoked, to say nothing of my guild charter. (I don't have a guild, but that doesn't matter, Dean Worm Her and all his ilk are literally frothing at the mouth. Over one schizo junkie. Yep, that's me!) I am, of course, very ashamed.
Because I am not even close to being sorry about my lack of good manners at all. Holy fuck, you assholes fucked everything up, and somehow it's all my fault. Wow! Well, that's what a raging drug addiction and the total denial of it will do to an otherwise well-oiled machine of brutal oppression. (Bellgab, I love you.) How did anyone not see this coming? Oh, I suppose they did... and then, neatly sidestepped the oncoming D5 avalanche.
Bigger than you can imagine. BIBLICAL. Clearly, more petty theft is a safe move, lol. WRONG.
But I suppose you all have to eat. (Income streams drying up? Maybe going door-to-door pushing solar panels is going to be your ticket out of poverty.) And I suppose I look like a juicy target still. I am quite plump, after all. And, I'm just begging to be bullied for lunch money, right? Omfg, it's like face blindness.
* Jackstar has had enough of your bullshit, Bellgab.
Everybody out of the pool. Actual: time to hustle. Site statistics: down from 1165 to ~33. Talk about leaving money on the table.
Remember: I'm just a needle junkie with HIV. Right? That's certainly what I heard. And I haven't heard of any retraction, explanation, or feelings of contrition.
You know what might help? Put on a French maid outfit and clean my fucking kitchen, you silly twatsplat mewling coterie of bī-bully ho-thugs. What are you, busy? Maybe you're held up in Customs, or something. I really have no idea.
Because I got high? No... because I really don't give a fuck. This is your message, Bellgab. FIX. CLEAN. POLISH. Do I have to be the goddam instructor? Y'all fucked up. Now, take accountability. Sure, you never had to before. IDC. Learn as you go. No one is getting any younger, you know.
And if you don't like it, I'm not surprised. It's not really very fair.
NONETHELESS: IT IS THE LAW. (Standards.) You're welcome.
I'm gonna go pretend to want to fap now. Because that's one of my jobs: pretending to be a frustrated sex addict.
Wye. That's why. Now scram, Friend. I'm sorry if I seem too brutal.
That's the training. (Also: you owe me a refrigeration unit and a written apology.) I'm not really enjoying all this surplus of human suffering.
Hey, I stayed out of your DMs, right? CAPIÇHE? I'm practically beatifiable. Without even ever having tried to be.
And, I love you. So, I'd rather see you all turn yourselves around on your own recognizance. And if it's just too hard, zI happen to know of a quality behavioral hospital you can all plop your asses down into. I'm sure all of all y'all would feel right at home.
(Vengeance for Shakena Godbolt.)
And, I don't know that that woman has got going on, but I called her for her email address and she acted like I was some kind of reprobate deviant. Like, damn. Tough crowd. Maybe I didn't belong there?
Maybe they shouldn't have stolen my gear? Maybe they shouldn't have assumed that I was an abject retard? Well, mistakes are how we learn. And, you know how kids are. They think they invented everything.
And they think I'm old. I'm at ⅒ of my expected lifespan. That would be ten years old, if I was gonna live to be 100. How long could I really live, though? 🤔 At this point, what difference does it actually make?
I retract the question. Do I really need to know? I doubt it. Similarly did I really need to lose my boots, my kilt, y flashlight, my... everything? Well, someone sure thought so and Shakena Godbolt was so disturbed, she hollered and shrieked at me on her HIPPA-compliant business telephone line.
Huh. I don't know if that's a cry for help, or if she finally figured out that she was totes screwed; but the fact of the matter is that I am the victim of a targeted scheme to get me “out of the way.” Is this going to go on much longer? It's tedious to endure.
Asking for a friend. To arrange for any necessary intervention. Because, gosh! I'd like to be eb getting on with my life, and I don't really mind if any of you think I'm not allowed to. I don't need any of you to allow me to live.
I simply and masterfully do so. Get the picture? Now, start signing checks, Cartoonist Twatmunch. What, are you sitting there with Girl Blofeld training a pistol on you? Awkward. Funny image, but decidedly awkward.
I'll leave you to your struggles. I am sure they are real. And the next time you want to score some low-hanging fruit, think again.
MY CAPACITY FOR INDULGING YOUR RIDICULOUSNESS HAS BEEN EXCEEDED.
And, still: no hugs Weird. I don't think your Ringleader thought all this through. No plan B, right? Because I'm a needle junkie with AIDS. Oh, wait.
Nope, that's the other one An easy mistake to make, I guess. I'm new around here. Not really sure how things work.
But you do: sow, I don't have to. I choose to work And, I don't work FOR YOU, BELLGAB.
That's the training. We'll see how things are next month. For now .. face reality.
PEOPLE >KNOW. I have no idea what they know, but they sure do know it.
And they know that I have sat your thuggy-bulky Oinkerton-fed D. E. A. ± D. A. R. E asses down. Good. Someone had to. Now, go be effective. Because, after all.. public monies taken equates to being held accountable to various and sundry duties as guardians of the public’s trust.
tl:dr; you wish you could just suck my fat one and get this over with, I'm sure. Well, well, well, it's too late for that and I wasn't interested anyway. Try another strategy. Mix things up a little. Like, I don't know... how about you sober up for a while? You might like it.
I certainly did. I certainly will again. And if my consumption of entheogenic compounds were any of your fucking business, Bellgab.. then business would be booming. Just imagine it: a life without the constant feeling of impending DOOM.
That's what you lost by trifling with me. Because I could be more subtle. More soft touch I could also flip the fuck out. Would anyone notice? I DOUBT IT.
I have chosen the path less traveled, Bellgab. Without being at all obvious about it. Oh, you're welcome.
Good talk You work; so I don't have to. Tarbaby owe ewe T