https://youtube.com/shorts/uMiBN-3Xz7Y?si=Nx4pNxyzLFnSN1clCould you sell it to me
Technically, no:
A) I don't have permission to engage in commerce with certain *key* entheogenic compounds, and in fact, I don't deal drugs at all. ,(I know, I made it seem PLAUSIBLY! CERTAIN! that I was into that kind of thing. That was bait, Son. You were easy to lead on, Sib. Feel the sting? That's not just pride fuckin' wit′ ewe. That's The TickLμ of A Sourç‹rπrœr.
*tee-hee!*) Also, considering how much effort you spend gaslighting; first I’m a needle junkie. Then, I won't stop smoking. I wasn't smoking and hadn't been told to stop, but that didn't stop Your Friend, Rockhound Junkeμ!Jew-Jelli, the most jelly Jew this side of the Pecos, from getting on the phone and running game on me.
THIS WOMAN STILL CALLS WHEN ORDERED TO &AND DISGUISES HER VOICE AS VARIOUS OTHER WOMEN THAT MY DICK HAS BEEN IN. YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW CREEPY AF THIS IS.¹ Also: PaladinVision™ is
ræl. (Facts.) For all those reasons and more... well, I'm not seeing myself ever become a street-level dealer, mostly because I have no interest in busting pedestrians. I am much more effective at combating the twin scourges of drug addiction and tax evasion at the esoteric level.
B) Your money is my money, Fuck⁰. You want to buy drugs, go ahead. I don't judge. You get within arms’ reach of me, ever, you're likely to have a brief nap, followed by a dream in which you watch me counting your money, finding my father's wallet, and fucking your ewe. This is a destiny story we can all fap to.
C) Ho ho ho, silly Punyling! You could not handle the gak that I am built to ingest! What gives me a slight buzz and mild elation would probably have you stroking out on your front lawn. (Standards.) Honestly, I think it best if you continue to do your own outlaw thing, I'm sure the high is better because you're totally getting away with it, but meanwhile: NGL, I get an Olympus Mons-level rush when I think about how I can engage in adult activities... lawfully. I don't have to break the law. SOURCER∅R KNOWS: THE LAW BRAKES FOR mE! RAWR! Let this sink in: I'm actually not joking. (Facts.) Why sell them, anyway? I'm going to want them later. I've got my whole life ahead of me! I'm going to be busting your balls over this for decades, Uncle Tim/Tom. (Speaking of which: classy.)
any cheaper if I were your own mother?
She's been resurrected and re-shackled back to The Great Wheel of Karma. For those of you who doubt such things, know that karma is what one gets when one does not do their dharma. That's kinda like “duty.”
I would never dishonor my mother by mocking her failures in public, because I really just don't have that much time on any given day. But also... she did her best,
in her own understanding, and I doubt she really minds that her stupid sibling rivalry with her insipid dingbat sibling caused a great deal of hassle... AND THEY HAD NEARLY FIFTY FUCKING YEARS TO TELL ME ANYTHING REMOTELY EVEN COMING CLOSE TO THE TRUTH. Instead:
bupkis.
How can anything ever be her fault, really? It was a secret. I suppose it still is, because I don't really know how much pole of either variety she smoked in this house... rumor has it: a non-zero amount.
I don't harass her at the gas station where her new life works. I see her there from time to time. I still love her just the same, and though she is quite pretty and looks to be about 29... she's still my mother. It's not “an uncanny resemblance.” IT'S THE SAME GODBLESSED WOMAN IN ANOTHER FLESH SUIT. SENT BACK DOWN FROM HEAVEN TO DO HER PENANCE, BY COMMAND OF ALMIGHTY GOD.
I suppose her wish was that I would survive and thrive in spite of her, many ridiculous falsehoods and questionable decisions, and I suppose that she didn't really know for sure if she would end up in Heaven. But she has, since I'm doing pretty okay, and likely to continue doing better, and instead of me demanding sex from her, or having to hear about her being raped every night, I quietly let her go about her business and don't embarrass her by how completely not attracted to her I am, and how I'm pretty sure that would be the case no matter how high I was, and she's goddamn lucky to be burning off her penance in a gas station greasy spooned rather than boiling an internal sewage in hell, so she should be happy enough.
Wouldn't hurt her to crack a smile when she sees me once while, rather than run back and hide behind, whichever alpha dog male is behind the counter, but I suppose she's been weaponized, and warned to stay away from me (I AM PARIAH! FEAR MY POTENCY! RAWR!), and didn't realize just what kind of rough beast squoze its way out of her coochie back in 1973, Secretariat had won the Kentucky Derby that day, well, I'm a thoroughbred of another breed.
Hey Azz, here's an idea: since you have so much fucking free time these days, why don't you figure out how you're going to RESTORE THIS HOUSE AND RETURN MY MONIES?? Strictly speaking, it's not all your responsibility, but it's enough that you might as well save yourself time by getting to run lead point on the project. I already know that you're good at passing messages from people who need to pay anonymous, and I already know that nobody thinks that this is going to happen, and I'm well aware. You're probably kind of annoyed and don't really feel like he need to do anything of the kind.
Well you're f****** wrong about that too. Chop-chop! Pronto, Tonto, let's get those lil’ legs movin’. Build a team. I will make some of them come. The rest can loaf about and watch, or get to work on fixing the house you f***** up. No shame in it, I bet a lot of people would like to be on a team of people who get paid to watch me f***, but that's probably not going to happen, because you're probably going to force them to work and you won't want to let them watch me f***, in fact, you don't want to let me f*** at all, but that's another thing you're wrong about.
You're going to fix my goddam residence, you're going to get me another refrigerator, and I'm going to f*** whomever I choose to f*** whenever I feel like getting around to f******. That's just the way it is.
Anything less would be un-civilized, off-brand, and I'll be on
TILT before I let your spaz-fag notions of what passes as a work ethic stand by unchallenged for too much longer. You think I need to work. What you actually think is that I need to work
for you.
I did. Boom-ka boom-boom. Big-big boom. What? Maybe you should have been a better talent scout than you were a truth fluffer.
We all make mistakes. Yours just happened to end up being expensive. Frankly if you stop being a snoot and start looking at the situation rationally, you'll come to realize that this place really is a gold mine. YOU PROBABLY KNOW THIS ALREADY.
And it is MINE. So there. /flex
¹: >K, you hauled my ass back to Seattle because, and I quote, “I wanted to leave you someplace that you would be safe,” fast-forward 19 years and you and your Company of Rat Kings are now the owners of THREE (3) McMansions all built together where my home was. And you all thought that would be funny, that you would succeed at this while remaining cloaked, and that there would be nothing I could do. Bellgab... you're still an infamous clique of Sperglord digi-warriors... but are you an
effective clique?
Prove it then. Show us. Effect something. Effectively. We know you think you can do this.
I legit don't think you can. It's been 3½ years and you still don't know what happened at the ambush, although obviously you think you do, and clearly seem to be aware of some amount of personal responsibility, as well as your position as
de facto ringleader of the quasi-anomous group that, even now, slouches its way to a Congressional Sub-Commitee conference room to testify behind closed doors about various forms of malfeasance that they are deep-Lē¡g!¿ & fabulous-Lee & incontrovertibLμ ¡Liberaçe!-level going to be put down in the annals of history for.
Believe īT, for I am the herald of your collective doom. BIBLICAL. (Looks good on you though.) No more tears now. Get to work, because I don't have to.
* Worthauger does not have to work, because he chooses to work, which is automatically more effective. (Facts.)
