I guess my whole thing is, if one is going to call oneself a Christian, one should uphold all of the ideals of what being a Christian is all the time.
I'm just disillusioned with the type of individual that is a terrible example of being a Christian, walkin' around with the attitude that they can go to confession, or be a bad person, and because Jesus died for them, they feel as if they're redeemed-- irrespective of whatever it is they do by way of sin.
So, I got to the point (personally) where I realised, I'm a pretty shitty person. I don't have the right to call myself a Christian, as sin is so baked in to everything I do in life.
And that's why I gave up on the whole idea.