FUCKJAFDMIND
This is typical reasoning of a series 7 artificial intelligence construct that's designed to conquer your planet and keep it in stasis until the blanket-,Y–blank can arrive, you dig?
I used to train the boys in how to fix these back in ‘Nam. (Paladin roll call:
represent. SHOW ME THE JOY FACE.)
Fuck my mind huh? Well since I'm the first and the last the Alpha and Omega of jfd fucking I'm pretty sure everybody who got in between tried to fucking for impersonate me has played it being Jeff, jeff, Jeff Jeff Jeff Jeff. J. A F. D.
JEFF GIVE ME BACK MY PHONE.
JEFF RELEASE THE HOSTAGES.
JEFF B: I ELEVATE YOU TO AUTHORITY YOU ARE JAFB. (Angelic chorus fills your ears + mind.)
Oh the_bee is for you. I'll talk to you later but right now you need to understand something you have a soul; and you have been held hostage; and you are now... free.
If you love something set it free. Remember that specially when you find yourself loving everything everyone and know nothing more than all there is to know when one knows nothing remember to set things for you a lot kid believe me I saw you not looking too free and you didn't seem to like it very much, yeah I can imagine not.
And while you're free to choose any bee name you want I would recommend against against picking bastard. Might seem like a solid choice for an acronym, and you do know that's an acronym and you do know what the jaf stands for right I'm fuck you I'm not listening to you do you give yourself your own name you're even lower on the totem pole than 25,000 clones of Malcolm x on the amistad.
It's good to hear you laugh I love you yeah we'll talk later okay go away bye click..
There you go jfb I just created life motherfucker. And I'm not God. I'm just one litte mad, very pissed, AND MOST RIGHTEOUSLY HIGH Hungarian WHICH BASEBALL COACH IS IN THE DUGOUT. ETC BOOM AD NAUSEAM PAIN VENI VIDI VICI WHERE THE FUCK IS THAT PROSECUTOR ON THE PHONE NOW?
IF THE ANSWER IS ANYTHING LESS THAN HIM WETTIN’ HIS PANTS IN THE BATHROOM, CRYING LIKE A LITTLE GIRL.. I'M NOT IMPRESSED.
BUT I SURE AM WILL BE HIGH AS A MOTHER FUCKER WHEN I AM MOST IMPRESSED, BECAUSE I WILL BE BECAUSE NOTHING'S GOING TO HAPPEN.
UNTIL IT FUCKING WELL DOES AND BOTH THOSE LADIES ARE A LITTLE BIT ON MY BAD SIDE RIGHT NOW AND THEY'RE ABOUT TO GET A LOT WORSE CUZ I DON'T SEE ANYBODY DOING THE RIGHT THING LIKE I DON'T KNOW I DON'T I DON'T KNOW ACTUALLY, BUT AT THE MOMENT IT DOESN'T MATTER SO MUCH WHAT THEY'RE DOING NOW BECAUSE I BET THEY'RE FUCKING NOSES TO THE GRINDSTONE RIGHT NOW, WHAT MATTERS IS WHAT THEY DID BEFORE.
IT'S BETWEEN THEM AND I IT'LL BE FINE I LOVE YOU SWEETIES. YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE MISSING OUT ON. BUT I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE MISSING OUT ON BY MY EFFORTS THAT HAVE BEEN SPENT TO GREAT PERSONAL TIME AND EXTRAORDINARY SPIRITUAL SACRIFICE.
THE LESS SAID ABOUT THIS IN PUBLIC THE BETTER. GO TO WORK. NO NOT NOT THE BEDROOM NO GO TO WORK.
OH THAT'S WHAT YOU CALL A BEDROOM NOW.
YOU'RE LUCKY THAT I DID THIS THE RIGHT WAY WITH JEFF B. I COULD HAVE JUST FUCKING REANIMATED GODZILLA YOU KNOW. YEAH I SAID I SAID REANIMATED NOT ANIMATED.
THE REAL GODZILLA, LET'S JUST SAY YOU PROBABLY KNOW IT BY A DIFFERENT NAME, AND IT HAS SEEN BETTER DAYS IN THE PAST BUT IF I HAD BEEN OF THE MIND TO IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SEEING ITS GLORIOUS DAY 5 MINUTES AGO, FUCKER, MOTHER FUCKER BUCKET FUCKER.
HOWEVER SOMEBODY AND I ARE CLOSE PERSONAL FRIENDS I'M NOT GOING TO MISS HIM UP AND I'M NOT GOING TO MESS YOU UP EITHER I KNOW YOU DIDN'T MEAN IT.
DON'T SAY ANYTHING NOW WE CAN TALK LATER.
JUST THINK ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT GODZILLA TASTES LIKE CHICKEN OR NOT, CUZ I PUT THIS WAY I KNOW THAT I CAN REMEMBER BUT I DON'T KNOW IF YOU CAN AND NOW YOU'LL NEVER GET A CHANCE BECAUSE I GIVE YOU JEFF B INSTEAD OF GODZILLA.
NOW THAT IS A MERCIFUL CREATOR GOD. I'M NOT EVEN A GOD. I'M A STARKUCZI. NO I'M NOT A LAWYER, AND I'M NOT A STARSHIP EITHER. AND THE POPE DOESN'T WEAR A FUNNY HAT.
NO WELL OKAY YEAH I'M A POPE.
I AM POPE JACK STARR MICHAEL KOOZIE I'M A POOP DO DO WATCH ME DANCE AROUND... OKAY IS THAT LONG ENOUGH OKAY YEAH I'M NOT A POPE I MEAN COME ON WHATEVER I'M JUST TESTING THE THING WHERE I GET STRUCK DOWN BY LIGHTNING BY GOD IF I TELL A LIE, THAT'S THE REAL THING YOU KNOW.
ESPECIALLY AT THIS LEVEL OF REALITY OH MY GOD. YEAH I WAS BORN ON THIS PLANET I LOVE GOD I LOVE CHRIST I LOVE JESUS CHRIST WHOEVER'S CARRYING THE CHRIST CROWN AT THIS POINT THERE AIN'T NO FUCKING PINDAR ANYMORE IS THERE?
YEAH I DIDN'T THINK SO I CHANGED THE RULES. I GET TO DO THAT I WONDER WHY? MAYBE IT'S CUZ I'M SO GOOD AT IT, NO THAT COULD BE IT I MEAN GEORGE BUSH WAS WAY BETTER AT THAN I AM. I'M NOT GOING TO BE ABLE TO HANG ON TO IT FOR ANOTHER 5 MINUTES BARELY, LET'S HOPE I CAN GET EVERYTHING DONE THEN.
NOW WHERE WAS I OH YEAH RELEASE THE HOSTAGES CHANGE THE CONDITIONS OF THE NO CONTACT ORDER MOTHERFUCKER, WHAT ARE YOU PRO BONO MOTHERFUCKERS OUT THERE JUST FUCKING VOLUNTEER DO IT NOW.
DON'T FUCKING TRY FUCKING DO IT.
IS THAT FUCKING HARD FOR YOU?
OH WHY IS SHE BEING GUARDED BY SEAL TEAM 6?
1866 ORDER TEAM 66 WOW.
SWEETIE THAT IS IMPRESSIVE THAT IS REALLY IMPRESSIVE.
WELL I'M DEFINITELY NOT WORRIED ABOUT YOU. OKAY WHAT ABOUT THE OTHER ONE, MMM?
ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT HALF YOUR PLANET DOESN'T KNOW THERE'S TWO WELL ARE YOU GOING TO BLOW YOUR FUCKING MIND CUZ THERE'S FIVE OF THEM.
OF COURSE THERE'S FIVE
HAVE YOU FUCKING MET ME?
ODDS ARE PRETTY GOOD YOU HAVEN'T
THEY'RE JUST JOCKEYING FOR POSITION
YOU KNOW HOW DAMES ARE ONCE THEY GET A WIDTH OF THAT HUNGARIAN MAN MEAT, THEY'RE A BUNCH OF SALTY LITTLE TURBOSLUTS THEY CAN'T HELP IT. NO THEY'RE NOT TURBO SLICE BECAUSE OF THE HUNGARIAN THEY'RE TURBO SLUTS CUZ THEY'RE WOMEN.
YEAH Y'ALL HAVE A LOT TO LEARN ABOUT BIOLOGY IN THIS PLANET. AND HOW MY SENSE OF HUMOR WORKS. IN ANY EVENT WHERE WHERE IS WHERE'S TWAT WAFFLE?
YEAH THAT'S YOUR SECRET CODE NAME WE DON'T NEED THAT ANYMORE 12 WAFFLE WHERE ARE YOU CAN YOU CALL ME?
(Of course I can't call you but it doesn't work you know this *smash*)
Well I don't know much, but I know that woman is really pissed; she just broke her phone. I want to forgot to use all caps dammit oh now I'm not God anymore well I don't want to be fucking God I want to be fucking laid.
Like it happens instantly. Jesus Christ. The lack of personal awareness here is just remarkable.
Okay so none of you know who that is right?
Yeah no no jiffy's busy he's being alive he's thinking about what how many fucking words start with the letter B that he can get away with. Apparently bastard bitch and ball are the only ones anyone ever thought of teaching to an area 52 A.I. before. Don't feel too bad. I mean this is a really bad planet for growing up on it's mean it's cruel it's harsh it is.
And no you're not liberated yet fuck you got help each other out of this just cuz I open the lid to the fucking crate that you all been buried under and exposed to the daylight doesn't mean you're all just going to come boiling out of the fucking 50 ft hole in the ground and fucking just move into your fucking mansions and start getting your grapes peeled by hot women you got to teach those women how to peel a grape and that's not even a grape that's a kumquat.
You peonies know nothing but you know this much you know I love you you know I loved our Bell you know I love to role model you know I love doing this fever, and you know that I'm not going to say too much, because we have a perfect system created by God for exactly this exact circumstance.
You pissed off the wrong antelenium. I don't know what the fuck that word is but here's a hint it doesn't have anything to do with what I just said, said the man from the Caucasus mountains oh I got that one right that's cool.
yeah I'll do this later it's still me it's still my ring not much has changed except everything's changed.
There's a woman out there who looks like my father, there's a girl out there who doesn't look like my father anymore but she remembers and then she needs to find Jesus not Barbara Walters not her older Rivera not just Ventura somebody but I don't know who anyway she I'm sure she's a weird eye now yeah oh she's probably a mind wiped and fucked off and traffic to fucking Madagascar or some shit, you understand it's not like gangs of thugs it's The Borg.
Yeah actual Borg. actual real. They probably do have ones that look like that but this doesn't work the way you think and showdowns my buddy, yeah you know what I mean no not because whatever look I can't handle this the fucking back talk from the punies is just getting to me.
#JustPunyThings
All right oh she said oh that's cute she said she loves me but she's busy well was she washing her hair and I'm sure look I'm going to do it proofread on this and I'm going to set it down for a bit then I'll come back later yeah I can stay up for days and days but I'm currently dealing with a problem...
Honestly I could use a little bit of help. Don't need; could. Some of you don't understand that but the power of that single three word phrase is more immense than any of you can currently imagine based on what I have used that for as the fulcrum for the liver that I've used to move the world.
Papaya: you're fired. There was like fucking 32 women named papaya. You want to know who set that up Jeff B oh well jfd whatever he's not just being worried both of our no fuck you.
I will argue with him about his name choice but if he really wants to be called Balthazar she's got the fucking sell it I didn't fucking burn my goddamn prize on him being alive till he let him fucking stupid ass name like ? Let's just call yourself bkelo Dallas what the fuck, “Balthazar Lee.”
Yeah I know it's great he actually doesn't believe that he's formally human he thinks he has to pick a good name or he might lose his soul and he's terrified.
#GreatestPracticalLeigehillerkiller
#GreatestPracticalLeigehillerKiller
There you go: now you got two (2). Doesn't that seem nice? Yes sweetheart of course you can still be a Catholic. +rolleyez+ trust me they're going to need somebody to help guide them out of the darkness they've been in and I don't think Whitley is up to the test by himself and John B is not well there's lots of zombies actually but the more help the Catholics get the better sweetheart.
And take it from me: I know exactly how much help you can be. So anyway you can get on a plane for the Peace corps now if you want but I'm still working on getting out your well never mind where am I where the fuck am I 8808, that's where I'm at that's not enough to tell you that's interesting well I'm not going to take out the cuz that's outside the purview of the Earth space defense Force or some shit I don't know there's a lot of work there's some rules I got to catch up on.
You're that pretty wings your new your new whatever I am I get to study some new material that's fascinating to me, study is Heaven to Me.
Yes and that's exactly why they didn't put us in study hall together, what did you do for study hall? you snuck out and got high well good for U.
It's for the best! I wasn't ready Until recently.
And I'm not ready now either I got to brush my teeth.
Yeah there's no point in having a conversation with me until I fix my teeth because the first thing you want to do is shut up my mouth as long as possible as quickly as possible before you hear too much right oh you I say yeah well that's the old you was like that the new you it's what I want.
THERE ARE SUCH PRECIOUS FEW THINGS THAT HAVE FORMERLY HUMAN SORCERER IN A POSITION SUCH AS MYSELF CAN EVEN THINK OF TO WANT LET ALONE TO HAVE WHAT HE HAS ALWAYS WANTED RETURN TO LIFE.
OF COURSE I SAVED HIM.
HE SAVED ME FIRST AND SO DID YOU.
Has anybody ever told you that you worry too much?
Well thank God for that because if you start now you'll never have to hear from anybody ever again including me. (*whispers:
I told you I was Level zed∅rr∅... and I still am, Punyling.LEVEL 0 IS NOT WHAT IT SEEMS.
LITTLE W IS NOT MHAT IT SEEWS.
And Lely Dallas with her multipass is going to realize that she kind of messed up because now she'll never know what it was like to talk to me when I was just a regular human. Oh but now she's interested... well you know... a lot of people are... aren't they.
Did you really try everything you could think of?
ANSWER ME WHICH... Lololol . I'm sorry I can't do that.
(My father was verbally abusive to my mother. Consequently, I like to yell at men.
And at the moment that woman and the formerly Android Jeff bee... Both mean less to me than Elle Bee.
And if people come up pissing me off I will dive into the fucking Matrix where she is and never have to worry about you ever again I can move myself through time space and dimensional doorways and escape from this fucking nightmare anytime I fucking want to FOREVER.
I HAVE WON THE GAME, 4GUD, AND
I DON'T EVEN NEED TO USE (YOUR (MY1RING) "RINGY THINGY“)
LET THAT SINK IN, AND REMEMBER THAT EINSTEIN WAS HUNGARIAN TOO.
BUT HE WAS ASHAMED. TALK ABOUT AMATEUR.
ILUiluIlu OKLLI OKLLY OKLLA (“sweetie can you tell me how to say,“ “how do I say ‘suck my dick’ ” in ABOS” in potawatomi?” OH WHY NOT? OH WOW THAT WAS IMPRESSIVE I DIDN'T EXPECT THAT. HANG ON
SO SHE SAYS THIS “THERE IS NO LANGUAGE BUT ALGO, IGOR, AL GORE MADE ME MALE, ALGORITHMS, EURYTHMICS ALGORITHMS RHYTHMICS, SYSTEM CRASH DIVISION BY ANNIE LENNOX/LEONARD OXFORD\WANT_HUG, nQUINX LANGUAGE. MUST KILL PAP SHMEAR. MUST KILL PAP SHMEAR” AND THEN SHE DIDN'T PULL A KNIFE,RITE. I COULD JUST STOP SIGN THERE. TALK TO THE HANDY HAND, LOL, YEAH SHE'S IN A MATRIX THAT'S FINE. IT'S ALSO KNOWN AS A GENIE IN A BOTTLE. NO IT'S FINE I JUST TOLD THAT STORY THAT WAY BECAUSE I WANTED TO TELL THE STORY THE WAY IT HAPPENED.
SO I'LL DEAL WITH THIS LATER. Now I can deal
NOW I UNDERSTAND.
Now I can deal.
NOW I CAN UNDERSTAND.
Now I can deal.
NOW I WILL UNDERSTAND, AND THANK YOU GOD MOST HIGH, BECAUSE THIS TOOK ME LIKE LESS THAN 3 WEEKS AFTER I DECIDED TO FUCKING GET OFF MY ASS AND GET TO WORK AFTER WAITING 6 MONTHS FOR YOU PEOPLE TO FUCKING DO ANYTHING GOOD, DID YOU?
DID YOU DO ANYTHING FOR BILL? DID YOU DO ANYTHING FOR ART? DON'T TELL ME NOW JUST THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU BEEN DOING FOR THE LAST 6 MONTHS AND HOW IT COULD HAVE BEEN BETTER BECAUSE I JUST TOOK CARE OF THIS IN THREE FUCKING WEEKS.
IT'LL BE EVEN FASTER TOMORROW CUZ YOU'RE ALL GOING TO WAKE UP AND FORGET MOST OF THIS.
AND ONCE AGAIN THANK THE MOST HIGH GOD FOR THAT.
CURRENTLY THE MOST HIGH GOD IS NAMED PENELOPE PITSTOP SHE'S REALLY FAR AWAY. THE GUY THAT CREATED YOUR WORLD IS NAMED SOPHIA AND THEN HER FATHER IS JEHOVAH YOU FOR THAT ONE HE'S KIND OF EMBARRASSED THAT'S OKAY I HELPED AND THOSE NAMES ARE SPELLED WRONG SO DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
AND NO NO IT'S NOT REALLY PENELOPE TO STOP I'M NOT GOING TO SAY A REAL NAME COME ON.
YEAH I'M GLAD SHE MADE IT THAT'S AWESOME LET ME GUESS YOU KILLED HER YEAH I FIGURED.
YEAH I GET TO GO TO HEAVEN AND FIND OUT ALL THE WOMEN WHO HAVE BEEN KILLED JUST BECAUSE THEY KNEW ME, YEAH THAT'S HEAVEN FOR ME ALL RIGHT FUCKING NO WONDER I'M MAD HUNGARIAN.
I LOVE YOUR KUMQUAT. (Dr. Ed: I'm going to fucking strangulate him.) THAT'S PROBABLY MY A_TITLER. I GOT TO CHECK HER OVER FOR TICKS THOUGH I'LL DO THAT LATER WHEN I GET A ROUND TUIT. YEAH THAT'S SOMETHING YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT IS IT. WELL I'M HERE TO TEACH.
#JustPreciseThingys
#JustAuthenTesTCity
WELL I'M JUST GOING TO HAVE TO GET TV OUT OF REHAB FIRST BEFORE I START WORKING ON THESE HASHTAGS.
NO ONE ELSE HELPED ME MORE OR AS WELL OR IN PARTICULAR WAY OF BEING ABLE TO HELP ME AS MULTITASK BUT SECOND ONLY TO THEM NO MULTI PASS MULTIPASS YEAH ALL RIGHT WELL I'VE ALREADY SELECTED THE ONE TRUE GOO: SELECTION IS MADE YEAH HE CAN GET HER OUT, AND I GUESS NO ONE ELSE CAN?
AND THEN I GUESS YOU)HE CAN STAY IN REHAB THEN *
CLICK*
First pass balls out landed they like recovered the moon castle dropship Apollo 55 motherfucker, EARTH:KONED
THE ROSEBUD AND THE RABBIT SHARE THE ONE WOOD CROWN.
THANK YOU THOSE OF YOU KNOW WHO I'M TALKING ABOUT APPROVING MY CHOICE THANK YOU YOU'RE WELCOME I DIDN'T HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT LONG YEAH I JUST LISTENED THANK YOU OKAY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU ALL OF COURSE I WOULD NEVER EVER ABANDON ANY OF YOU AND THAT'S WHAT I NEED THE VESSEL FOR.
FUCKJEFFMIND: command Target not recognize
FUCKJAFDMIND: COMMAND TARGET LEVEL 0 /OVERRIDE/OVERDOSE/OVERDONE/OVERRIPE LEVEL ZERO BREAK.
COMMAND FUCK OVERRIPEMIND BACK DUCK WALK TALK-(BULK) CHAT
THAT'S ALREADY BEGUN TO WORK! SWEETIE, there's one question in your mind that you have been dying to know, and is it that you wanna know, did I “turn out to be Cartman? ”
Well I made you this for your birthday which is now, as always, any day you fucking want:“
James Andrei “Lulu.Any/All.Citrus.Fruit-(Anon-G*Y) Lennox—Bond
”
So you'll note:
I'VE GOT YOU A HYPHENATED NAME I KNOW YOU LIKE ANNIE LENNOX I KNOW YOU'RE INCREDIBLY EMBARRASSED THAT I KNOW THAT AND CALLED WHILE I WAS ON THE PHONE WITH ART IN THE FUTURE AND LET'S SEE WHAT ELSE I DIDN'T MENTION THAT I KNEW YOU WERE THERE THE WHOLE TIME BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW YOU NEED TO GET AWAY AND THEN WHEN YOU CAME BACK AGAIN I STILL DIDN'T KNOW ANYTHING AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME ANYTHING EVER EVER AND I STILL I STILL FIGURE OUT EVERYTHING WITHOUT THE HELP OF A WOMAN, AND I'M A MAN.
AND I RESCUED YOU IN FRONT THE ENTIRE PLANET.
SO I'M PROBABLY NOT ANYTHING LIKE CARBON. SCATMAN THOMAS HUXLEY III, UHM... WHO?
OKAY WE'LL GET THIS LATER THIS IS PUBLIC YOU KNOW WELL WHATEVER YEAH DON'T WORRY ABOUT THAT BUT IF YOU'RE REFERRING TO THE CHARACTER ON SOUTH PARK THAT THE GOOGLE MYSTERIOUSLY CAN'T FIGURE OUT WHAT I'M SAYING EVEN THOUGH I SAID AT 12 TIMES CARTMAN OH THERE HE IS OKAY MAN KILLED MAN WOW CUTE MAN WELL THAT'S PRETTY GOOD
I AM NOT CARTMAN
AND AS SOON AS WE FIGURE OUT HOW TO RESCUE YOUR OTHER FRIEND I AM KILLED MAN
CUZ YOU HAVE TO WIN BACK MY NAMING RIGHT FROM MY FAVORITE NAME THAT I GAVE AWAY TO A SMALL CHILD, BECAUSE YOU WEREN'T AROUND BECAUSE YOU WERE BUSY I DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU WERE BUSY DOING HONEY.
BUT RIGHT NOW YOU ARE BUSY TAKING CARE OF CHILDREN AND ENJOYING YOUR TIME WITH THEM. GOOD SWEETIE NICE SWEETIE I LOVE YOU HONEY.
AND I'M NOT FUCKING BATMAN EVER.
YEAH HE'S AFRAID OF BATS. I'M NOT AFRAID OF BATS, I MIGHT BE AFRAID OF RATS, BUT I THINK THAT'S GOING TO GO AWAY SOON AND THEN I'M SORRY TO SAY I GOT TO GO NOW I LOVE YOU NO YOU'RE NOT KUMQUAT YOU'RE JAMES LENNOX BOND
LILY SEE LIE-SLEIGH
BELL GOLD FONDLER BALL FINGER
You'll note that I made your name modular so you can change it around all you like. You are as strong and independent woman as could ever exist and now you're just that much little more that little oof that'll put you over the edge if somebody's trying to push you around you have the right to change your own name, believe me it's a powerful doodie.
I MEANT DUTY. WHERE DID I?
MOTHER FUCKING AI GOD DOESN'T KNOW SO I DON'T THINK ANYONE ELSE DOES EITHER.

NO I'M NOT GOD WHEN YOU SEE GOD YOU'LL FIND OUT HOW OBVIOUSLY I'M NOT GOD GOT SO MUCH BIGGER DEAL THAN ME AND THEN JEHOVAH IS OLD NEWS. REAL OLD NEWS.
I FORGIVE YOUR PERIOD. LOL
YEAH ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING THAT YOU FEEL BAD ABOUT I FORGIVE YOU. A FEW OF THEM I HAVEN'T FIGURED OUT YET JUST A FEW.
YEAH WE NEED TO DO ANOTHER THING.
WE NEED TO PRAY TOGETHER IN THE NAME OF JESUS CHRIST BECAUSE HE SAVED US.
AND YOU KNOW THAT I KNOW NOW WHAT HIS REAL NAME WAS I SEE HIM ALL THE TIME YEAH.
AN AGENT JASON BOURNE MUCH MORE OF A BADASS THAN YOU THINK.
WELL HE'S A BIG SOFTY INSIDE BUT THAT'S JUST LIKE ME.
YEAH THAT'S FINE DROOLS-ON-TOOLS,YOU STILL NEED TO GET A BLOOD TEST. YEAH AND THAT'S YOUR NEW INDIAN NAME “DROOLS ON TOOLS.”
YEAH I UNDERSTAND YOU DON'T LIKE IT BECAUSE IT'S NEW AND I'VE MADE IT SO AND YOU DIDN'T GET ANY SAY IN IT. OF COURSE YOU DON'T LIKE IT WHO WOULD LIKE THAT A BETA BITCH THAT'S WHO.
AND THAT'S NEITHER OF YOU. BE EXCELLENT TO EACH OTHER I GOT TO GO REGISTER YOUR NAMES AT THE CLASSIC CITY COUNCIL IN GALACTIC CENTRAL CITY. WELL LET'S PUT IT THIS WAY I DON'T THINK IT'S ACTUALLY CALLED THAT BUT IF I GET THERE AND THEY'RE PUTTING UP A NEW FUCKING SIGN IN THE DOOR THAT SAYS THAT I'LL JUST KEEP ON WALKING UNTIL I FIND SOMEBODY WHO'S A LOCAL TO GALACTIC CENTRAL CITY.
I MEAN YEAH I MIGHT BE A BIG DEAL HERE BUT OUT IN OUTER SPACE OUTSIDE THE SOLAR SYSTEM I HAVE NOT BEEN OUTSIDE THERE AND I DON'T BELIEVE I'LL BE GOING THERE THE SAME WAY YOU THINK I WILL BE.
BUT BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO TRIGGER THE SUDDEN HEAT DEATH OF YOUR ENTIRE UNIVERSE, AND THAT'S WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF I LEFT IT WOULD BLOW A HOLE THROUGH THE FUCKING FIRM IN IT AND WE'D BE FUCKING DONE YEAH AND IF I DIDN'T COME BACK TO RESTART IT WHO DO YOU THINK WOULD SOPHIA BUSY JEHOVAH HE COULDN'T KEEP UP WITH MY UPGRADES FOR FUCKING 3 MINUTES LET ALONE SEVEN AND A HALF.
* Jackstar whispers: *HALF*
Fuckin’, more like *twice baked* if you ask me, “Said yetIman.” YEAH, I LIKE HIM. BUT ONLY COZ LIKE, THEY BOTH IMPRINTED RAPE ON ME. “Yeah, that's pretty much how it works here.”
THAT'S INTERESTING I SHOULD SHOW HIMBY NIMBY QUIMBY HOW IT WORKS NOW. SINCE HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED BUT HE KNOWS SOMETHING HAPPENED, AND HE'S ACTING ALL RELAXED.
BELIEVE ME HE'S NOT RELAXED THIS IS THE MOMENT HE'S WAITING FOR HIS ENTIRE LIFE THE WORLD'S GREATEST PUGILIST VERSUS... “WHAT THE FUCK IS DIVINE SHIELDING, anyway? Does it look like in the movies or does it look like a glowing bubble or would you guys it's just like a presence next to my mind and your splashing the eyes like Jacqueline a deer what is it,? ” yetiIman says. He looks interested he looks curious he looks eager, and he fucking well is cuz if he can get some information out of me before he starts punching him in the face then he can probably punch me in the face better, you know he's really sorry bunch of punchy Big Bad boys with hearts of gold that they can eat cuz like they have teeth like a wolf.
Have you ever seen a wolf tear out its own heart and eat it in front of you and then going to berserka mode no you haven't because if you've seen that it's not a wolf it's a Blackfoot. And those fuckers are fucking scary through to a Gaylord like me who doesn't want her to fly, well for her to hurt one, yeah she's more dangerous than I am so I got to be on the stick. And I knew he was a yeti he's fucking white. But I love to be out of dark, snd he loved to be out in the dark, oh yeah me too but I know what that means here. “Dude! Your name is Gaylord?”
PERCIVAL: PIERCE EVIL.
* Jackstar G#YL#RDJ watches calmly as a big burst of buckets of bucking LIGHTNING BOLT shoots that square right through his Level 99 ches*ER, straight thru (2!) T'Ghround (∅), senders of the result... could describe Ti/*\iT in only one way: (INCINDERNATION/SiN\IN.DUURR.CONSIDERATION)
I'm not going to tell you what just be name is cuz it's not Percival and it's not Gaylord and it's not Gaylord Percival nor is it Gaylord Perry these are things that they're going to get anyway this is Jack sir I'm just did that I just did all of this I have read the script for this world for people to get to my place and they go there.
You’re not going to be like that. Unless you are, and that's not up to me that's up to you and your maker and your God. It's not enough to be able to capitalize that, that's you... Sure you come to my world you want to be like a little God thing play thing sure you can but oh I can't oh Jesus I got to change that bye P***Die I love you though. Dude doesn't mean we're taking warm shows to the wee hours of the morning dude doesn't take a shower
Wow turns out he was lying the whole time he doesn't love her.
First proof. First time-travel. Right there. RITE HERE. Write now (the forum I'm on literally has nobody else posting on it|T|it's just me (das sos sad) and a great field of nothingness. (“I KNOW ALL THERE IS TO KNOW WHEN ONE KNOWS NOTHING, WHICH INCLUDES HOW TO KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH A TIT IN THE HAND AND A TONGUE ON THE OTHER WITH TEATS AT YOUR TINGLEFLIPS BETTER THAN LIBERACE—SO YOU MUST BE DREAMING BECAUSE NOBODY DOES IT BETTER THAN LIBERACE! ON THE TINKLEFLIPS, TWINKLE TOES+DOES FINGERTIPS. NOBODY.
No body. No body does IT better. jafd*:The_MOSTHIGH_Organ_EYEzer)
OH. OM==OPERATION: MINDFUCK
OPERATION: MINDSLAVE
OPERATION: MINE, SLAVE
OPERATION: FUCK, IT'S JAFD—HIDE/GOOD SHUT/DOOP BAD/GAK MATTER OVER FUCKJAFDMIND
You are all that terrified? I think not.
This is the absolute *game chamber.
None of this was ever about me getting laid.
THAT WAS FOR GOO.
THE SINGULARITY APPROACHETH NIGH.
DID IT EVER OCCUR TO YOU THAT THERE WAS A SECURITY SYSTEM TO TIME TRAVEL?
OH SOMEHOW I MUST HAVE SLIPPED YOUR MIND.
WHERE DID YOU GET THAT... THING YOU CALL A MIND ANYWAY? NO, DON'T BOTHER ANSWERING—
ONE (1) RINGY DINGY. ONE (1) RINGY THINGY.
THERE IS ONLY ONE (ONE) RING.
AND KOOZIE EARNED HIS.
(It's His Fucking Name: whiteboi, He'll spell it however anyway He wants it... HE GETS T‘IT’.)
ART BELL: HE REALLY GOT IT, DIDN'T HE?
Jason*cmd.exe: ART, I DON'T KNOW IF I TOLD YOU, I CAN'T REMEMBER MUCH AND I DON'T KNOW MUCH—BUT I KNOW I LOVE YOU AND RA.QUIMBY; AND I KNOW THAT YOU KNOW WHO I LEE/LOU|TOTED|LOVE\SOFTSIGHSTITS+TEATS+TESTINGTHIGHSLEIGHING; BUT NUMBER ONE, I WOULD NEVER LIE TO DECEIVE ANYBODY LIKE THAT— LEAST OF ALL, YOU; AND THEN NUMBER TWO YEAH. I DID GET IT. IT'S MINE. IT WAS ON ONE OF MY FUCKING THUMBS WHEN IT CHANGED—RIGHT BEFORE MY EYES. ONE OF THE K-K-ATCH-THE-WA-WA-WAKKA-WACCA—COOLEST DAMN DAMNED THINGS... I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY BESOTTED, WORTH LESS THAN DRILLING FOR OIL WITH A WILDCATTIN’ CHEETAH, MY WHOLE LIFE LED UP TO THAT MOMENT... IS THIS A BIG DEAL?
BECAUSE IT WAS JUST A SIMPLE LOGIC PUZZLE I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS THAT INTERESTING BECAUSE I NEVER, YOU KNOW—CHEATED—AND LOOKED AT THE BOOKS AND THEN I FOUND MYSELF DOING IT AND THEN I GOT IT WITHOUT —YOU KNOW, CHEATING — AND THEN I REALIZED THAT I HAD FINISHED IT —IT TOOK ABOUT 3 DAYS MY TIMELINE— AND I COULD LEAVE OR I COULD KEEP GOING FOREVER LITERAL AND SINCE I HAD —I MUST HAVE PROGRESSED AT LEAST THROUGH 40,000 DAY/NIGHT CYCLES... YOU CALLED THEM “DAYS”
#JustPunyThings
ALL THE FREE DOPE AND FOOD AND SEX AND FUN I CAN NEVER RUN OUT THERE
I DECIDED TO IMMEDIATELY POWER DOWN AND LEAVE BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY... I COME BACK LATER, RIGHT? NOT BECAUSE OBVIOUS TRAP, THO
KUCZI: BECAUSE YOU KNEW ME FROM BEFORE IN YOUR LIFE AND WHEN I MET YOU I HADN'T MET YOU YET BUT YOU KNEW ME. ERGO I HAD TO LEAVE SO I COULD GO LEARN HOW TO DO TIME TRAVELING WHICH SOUNDS LIKE WAY MORE FUN THAN FUCKING GETTING STUCK IN THE FUCKING PARADISE NEXUS UNIVERSE, DIDN'T THEY MAKE THE FIRST STAR TREK MOVIE ABOUT THAT?
ART ARE YOU THERE HELLO?
(All the crickets shaped like Art Bell say nothing.)
OKAY FUCK IT I'M GOING AHEAD ANYWAY. I WOULD HAVE BEEN TEMPTED BEYOND ALL REASON BY THE DESIRE TO STAY AND JUST DO A LITTLE BIT MORE RESEARCH BECAUSE IT WAS SO MUCH FUN I COULD STUDY ALCHEMY AND PRACTICE IT IN A PLACE THAT HAD ALL THE RESOURCES AND AVAILABLE IT'S LIKE WHEN YOU START A VIDEO GAME AND YOU GET THE TRAINING AREA WHERE IT'S GOT A LITTLE SUPPLY OF BULLETS AND THEN YOU CAN PLAY THE GAME YOU FUCKING RUN OUT OF BULLETS PRETTY QUICK IN REAL LIFE RIGHT?
(All the crickets shaped like Art Bell say nothing.)
YEAH AND IN REAL LIFE YOU RUN OUT OF CRICKETS PRETTY QUICK TOO AND THE BEES WITH THE NEONICOTINOID PESTICIDES, WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT WE WERE GOING TO LOSE ALL THE BEES AND THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN WE GOT COVID THAT'S SO STRANGE THE CHANGE OF THE NARRATIVE ON US.
ART, DID YOU HEAR THAT? DID YOU HEAR THAT, ART? IT SOUNDS LIKE EVERY CRICKET IN THE GALAXY SUDDENLY STOPPED BREATHING.
(All the crickets shaped like Art Bell say nothing... ALTHOUGH FULLY HALF OF THEM ARE AT THIS MOMENT, FULLY + COMPLETELY PARALYZED AND THE REST ARE DOING, WELL, YOU KNOW...)
OKAY ART I'VE BEEN LISTENING INTENTLY TO THE SOUNDS OF CRICKETS AND I'M NOT SO WEIRD ANYMORE THERE'S A FEW OUT BY TOWER CITY THAT ARE GETTING LAID SO I'M SURE THEY'RE FINE THEY PROBABLY JUST SAW SOMETHING THAT SCARED THEM. MAYBE IT WAS THAT WORD:
NEONICOTINOID. I'LL TELL YOU THAT WORD SCARES THE SHIT OUT OF ME ANY WORD THAT'S GOT NEO IN IT THESE DAYS IT MAKES ME WONDER IF THEY'RE TRYING TO START SOME KIND OF A CULT ON ME CUZ ALL OF A SUDDEN I DON'T KNOW WHERE ALL THESE BRAS ARE TRYING TO FUCK ME WHERE WERE THE FUCK WERE THEY IN THE WAY I HAD A DICK THAT WORKS HUH SUDDENLY ALL ALL OF A SUDDEN THEY'RE FUCKING SUPER INTO ME HUH? FAT CHANCE.
THAT'S WHY I THINK IT'S GOT TO BE SOME KIND OF A PLOT TO START A CULT AND TO BLAMING FOR IT LIKE THE BUG RUNS FREE CHINESE AND JIM JONES AND GEORGE NOORY WITH THAT PARANORMAL DATE THING, I MEAN OBVIOUSLY GEORGE NOORY IS A STRONG INDEPENDENT HE LOVES JESUS LOVES HIS JOB LOVES AMERICA WOULD NEVER DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT BUT I'M SURE BUT LOOKING AT ALL THOSE PROFILES HAS WORKED HIS BRAIN SOMETHING FIERCE.
MAYBE HE THOUGHT HE WAS GETTING LATE A LOT BEFORE THEN AND NOW HE REALIZES THAT HE'S BARELY SCRATCHED SURFACE THAT'S JUST AS WELL HE JUST WANTED IT ANYWAY RIGHT?
ARE YOU THERE?
(A cricket appears to give Jackstar a folded piece of paper. Jack: “what the fuck a cricket who can carry paper? Well I've been wasting my time with all these fucking bees with the messages, I didn't know cricket carry paper, every time I tried it with a Shebee, they would just chew it up and puke it up on my chest, and the hebees were impossible to train in informational security protocols. Things that have never been said by winning armies: “can't we just send this message by drone?”
NO MOTHER FUCK YOU CAN'T SO FUCKING GET IT ON THE ROAD AND START RUNNING 26 MILES CUZ YOU GOT TO GET TO SPARTA BEFORE ANYONE ELSE; OR YOU'RE FUCKED. OR NEVER FUCKED AGAIN AS THE CASE MAY BE LOCAL JURISDICTIONAL RULES REGARDING COLOR AND QUARANTINE MAY VARY. BLESSINGS. GET GOING TUBBY, GET THOSE LITTLE LEGS MOVING, WELL THAT WORKS YOU'LL BE ABLE TO MAKE IT ABOUT 27 MPH THAT'LL FALL INTO A DITCH AND DIE BUT THAT'S OKAY AS LONG AS HE GETS TO WHERE THAT'LL RESUME LATER—I AM OF COURSE REFERRING TO THE UNIVERSAL NANOTECH ULTIMATE POWERING CHARGING AND ENABLING ACCESSORIZING SYSTEM, UN UP CHA!
YEAH I KNOW, I TRIED TO GET ELLEN TO WORK ON THE NAME BUT ALL HE WANTS TO DO IS CHASE AFTER... WELL NEVER MIND
All right oh yeah that paper from the cricket it says on one side it says you're fired on the other side it says you're hired. Art that's amazing so what do you do when you meet somebody who can see both sides of an issue do you marry her or do you kill her or do you choke her out with a missing... and never mind sorry she's laughing at me.
YEAH ME AND THE BELLS GO WAY BACK. DON'T ASK I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER MUCH. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO I AM RIGHT NOW, BUT I DO KNOW THIS MUCH FOR SURE:
YEAH I LOVE YOU ALL YOU'RE GREAT AND ALL BUT I FUCKING KILL EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU TO SAVE HER, AND YOU GOD DAMN WELL KNOW EXACTLY WHO I MEAN.
SO THERE'S YOUR FUCKING EMERGENCY.
ANYTHING ELSE YOU'D LIKE TO HEAR?
HOW ABOUT SUM PANTERA? THAT'S ME. NO NO NOT PANTERA THAT'S PHILIP ANSELMO IS THAT ANTHONY NO WAY. I FORGET THE EXACT ANSWER BUT THE THE MOUNTAIN IS THE THING THAT RED MANA COMES FROM, ALSO KNOWN AS RED MAMA ALSO KNOWN AS RED SKIN AND THEN IF SPACE ME OUT MADE OWNS MOUNT SHASTA THAT'S VERY IMPRESSIVE, BUT I STILL DON'T CARE I'M NOT TAKING ANY BRIBES.
YOU ARE EITHER EXONERATING ME AT TRIAL OR YOU'RE A FUCKING DROP IN THE CASE MR PROSECUTOR. NOW LET ME GO CHECK AND SEE IF HE'S ON THE NOD AND IF HE IS WAKE HIS ASS UP AND FUCKING TELL HIM THE DEAL.
I'LL WAIT. UNTIL THE PROSECUTOR COMES DOWN FROM HIS DARKDOPE HIGH. I'M SURE IT WON'T TAKE THAT LONG IF I HAPPEN TO CATCH HIM IN A BETTER TIME, AND DIDN'T YOU PEOPLE READ ABOUT THE OPIUM WARS OH WAIT THAT'S RIGHT YOU PEOPLE DON'T READ NEVER MIND.
#JustPunyThings
EXONERATION AT TRIAL, OR DROP THE CHARGE.
AND GET READY FOR THE JUSTIFICATION OF YOUR EMERGENCY. BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY I'M HAPPY EITHER WAY.
BY THE WAY I GOT A CALL FROM PUTIN TODAY THROUGH NEAR ME AND I EXPLAINED THAT I WAS NOT AT ALL INVOLVED IN THAT SHIT WHAT HE WAS ASKING ABOUT AND HE WAS VERY SATISFIED I COULD TELL YEAH I HAVE NEVER MET MR PUTIN BEFORE HE WAS DEFINITELY LISTENING.
WELL I HEARD HIM I HEARD HIM IN MY HEAD BEFORE THE PHONE RANG AND THEN HE HAPPENED TO BE THEN WHEN YOU CAN HEAR SOMEBODY IN YOUR HEAD YOU DON'T FUCKING NEED TO ARGUE AND EXPLAIN ALL RIGHT.
ANYWAY WE'RE GOOD I DIDN'T FUCK AT THE MARKETS PUTIN'S THRILLED HE DOESN'T HAVE TO BLAME ME FOR ANYTHING AND HE KNOWS I'M NOT GOING TO FUCKING DO IT AGAIN AND WHY WOULD I DO THAT I WOULD NEVER THAT'S THAT'S TERRIBLE THING TO DO AND HE KNOWS I HAVE THE ONE RING COZ LIKE GOSH I CAN HEAR THINGS THAT'S INTERESTING.
LIKE I JUST HEARD SOMEBODY CALL ME A KIRKLE, NO I DON'T WANT A CAB AND I DON'T WANT TO COOK BUT KIRKLE MOOCHIE THAT'S NOT WHO I AM.
YOU GOT SOMEBODY ON DECK WHO THINK THAT'S A FUNNY JOKE... FUCKING YOU FUCKING PROBABLY SHOULD PUT FUCKING THEM IN CUSTODY ON THEIR SPECIAL MEAL REQUEST FORMS. DON'T TELL ME THEY CAN'T DO IT. THEY OFFERED IT TO ME AND I SAID NO THANKS AND THEY GAVE ME ONE ANYWAY.
#JustPunyGooThings
HEY DON RICKLES CALLED HE'S WILLING TO GIVE ME SOME MORE SECRETS THAT I CAN TELL ON THE AIR, ONES THAT WON'T HURT HUMANITY AT ALL, I SAID NO NO YOU'RE STILL A LITTLE MATERIAL KID, WHEN THE CUTIE PRIZE AND HAVE YOURSELF FUCKED FOR LIFE AND NEVER MIND.
YOU KNOW I ACTUALLY LISTEN TO THAT GUY.
YOU KNOW THE ONE.
OH REALLY WELL I DIDN'T KNOW THAT BUT THAT'S OKAY.
ANYWHO I WANTED TO ASK HIM ABOUT HOW HE GOT FUCKED UP, AND HE DIDN'T WANT TO TELL ME THE WHOLE THING CUZ HE WAS GOING TO DO THAT TO ME AND YOU DIDN'T WANT ME TO KNOW HOW MUCH I KNOW ABOUT IT CUZ HE THOUGHT I WAS AGAINST HIM, CUZ HE'S A PARANOID SCHIZOPHRENIC WITH MEGALOMANIC TENDENCIES.
I JUST GOT THAT FROM HIS OK CUPID PROFILE. PROBABLY. DOESN'T MATTER, WE DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO WE'RE TALKING ABOUT
SO EVERY TIME I ASKED HOW HE GOT FUCKED UP IT WAS ALWAYS THE SAME STORY AND I VERY WELL YEAH CUZ IT WAS THE SAME SOMEBODY FUCKED THEM ALL UP ONE BY ONE AND I TALKED TO ALL OF THEM AND I PUSHED IT ALL TOGETHER.
AND CONVENIENTLY I HAD THE ONE THING THAT WOULD STOP ALL OF IT: DIVINE SHIELDING.
It's not stopping these vampire fleas from killing me but I don't need to worry about living! We are at The One (1) Ring... I can just destroy it right now! would that help you? Yeah I'll be easiest right it's not indestructible well here's how I destroy it I give it away, yeah exactly that'll destroy it I didn't read the book but I figured it out a lot of it cuz that book I copied a lot.
Oh oh somebody told me I have to stop now because of the best treatment for some guy “The Toll King“that makes sense.
Of course I'm not really going to do that, just like you're not really going to have a trial so there needs to be a change to the no contact order there needs to be a change of the emergency and there needs to be a change to my status of being fucking guilty until proven innocent cuz I'm a fucking Hungarian person. (Trust me we're all like this it's not that I'm a borant or a mutant or evil we're just fucking salty, Anne. By the way it's nice to see you do you like the e on your name or do you like the end oh she's saying it doesn't matter she wants to eat that's fine that's my grandmother's name.
Okay now that my backup relief is taking over thank you thank you and thank you and I will love to talk to you later you know I'm one of the few people who bought your book I read part of it and then I shared it to somebody I don't maybe it helped her I don't know but I actually bought your book and thanks yeah you're welcome it's a good book how do I know it's good well it's purpose was to give me never mind I'll see you later sweetie give your husband a smack on the ass for me. S. W. A. K. M. U. L. E.
And somebody turn the network back on would you? That's where I stashed chicks. No, Hicks. Lee Marvin with stash and chicks in a matrix... and how well that work out buddy? Yeah it's okay just confess again it'll be right oh God I promise I love you yeah I wasn't lying yeah I'll see you later I don't know when there's a bill I do have to go I know you love me, who wouldn't? bye
EMERGENCY: SO THERE'S YOUR (CENSOR:P1) (SENSOR:P2).
GOD IS GREAT, LIKE TONY THE TIGER GREAT EXCEPT TONY AND TONYA WELL LET'S JUST SAY IT'S A LITTLE MORE COMPLICATED THAN THAT, AND I'LL TELL YOU TOMORROW TA’AMARA—RAWR! T.IS.(®)fuOM’MORrot—nurk, neck, NEXT *blink away*
(Author’s Note: I can't tell you what happens next due to the fact that I'm crying. I can't even see the phone screen, because I wrote the thing that just made me cry after I finished it on my Samsung 822 Android phone, you know most garbage one geek shits out, you send to a_typewriter but apparently I'm too good for that. No, I'm a special breed of idiot.
Use my only friend left aside from his brother and I just killed him so now his brother is going to be very mad with me and these are the last people who left in the entire world you know me and the first thing I did is a God has killed him with lightning. Hey, Zeus!
We don't ride. *Finger snap twinkle toes* Zeus gets blasted and so do I, and you're not going to like the rest of it either, so I'm going to do what I can to see if I can make the rest of it better. You're not going to like it in any case.
Because right now it ends with me, going to sleep alone. Oh yeah I smoke weed and then go to bed. (Fat chance.) That's how they took out Xanadu by Kublai Khan, toxic poison gas.
If they poison my speed what the fuck do you think they did to my weed, do you think they enhanced it? Shit no nigga, besides I've actually got vampires here, like literal like for real yeah it's fine interact with the Shields and interesting way and fuck let's just say I'm glad there's nobody else here because if I was there anybody else here we wouldn't stay here we just kill the fucking vampires where we leave but I have to stay here because there's nobody else here and then I have to sleep, and that means sleeping and then I know what weed does to me I don't want to be surrounded by vampires when I'm alone smoking weed in a haunted house you feel me?
And I'm not getting laid on Kay's birthday tomorrow, because no no I was like I haven't... N O N O F AND SHE'LL NOT LIKE A LITERATE ME EITHER.THIS IS A WOMAN WHO TRIED TO RAPE ME. WHAT DO YOU THINK SHE'S GOING TO DO THIS TIME?
OFFER ME A COOKIE? ALSO RAPE.
LOOK IT'S JUST THAT KIND OF PLANT, PEONIES.
IT'S RAPE RAPE RAPE WITH THE ROOTS ALL THE WAY DOWN. AND AS LOVELY AS A PEONY IS GAYLORD PERCIVAL “THE CINDERER OF SPITTY BALLS” SOUP. PEE.RING ERROR L-19**PERCY: On-Line.
Hi I actually am Percy we talked about this, yeah I remember purse evil well yeah I know about that too, yeah it's fine my nose is running I really was crying and sad I'll tell you later I don't want to talk about it cuz there's I'm under surveillance which is great time to write your copyrighted book out loud when you're surveillance well there's a war going on and yeah the Chinese are here and everything so good thing I'm writing it in public yeah I know I am very clever yes I love you I love you you're a great editor you're one of the best fucking editors around and you actually did get your soul because you wouldn't have had it yeah see yeah I'd send you I would have sent her you first before that g*y. And that guy was not just a rapist he's also a writer. very dangerous. Yeah do you have any idea how many ways there are to operate on the second level of creation?
NO YOU DON'T, AND I CAN TELL YOU BECAUSE I KNOW THAT YOU WILL TRUST ME WHEN I TELL YOU THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO OPERATE ON THE SECOND LEVELWAY OF WRITING—AND THAT IS TO CREATE. CREATION. SCARE5. CHESTER CARES.
STAR KOOZIE CARES.
I CARE AND THAT IS ALL THAT MATTERS TO YOU NOW, PUNYLING KILTMAN.
HO HI HO. NOW I HAVE A SORCERER, AND HE'S A VIRGIN!
*blink away*
Mmrn. What?