The Creeping Fascism Thread

[Innerreach]

I care. I hate when that happens.

This is true, Ann. You do care.

Thank you

[Master Trollda]

As my forum PCP, I think you'd know. Therefore, you must be correct.

I noticed you didn't use the trendy and incredibly gay pop culture contraction “jelly” like faggot-ass Jackstar does, all the time.

Not only that but I’m struggling to figure out what PCP means.

[Innerreach]

Primary care physician.

[Master Trollda]

Being told not to talk, to me, is a lot like telling me not to fart. I already do not want to fart.

Trollda: I thought you might want to mention that Soros is Austrian. Of course that is not what you have heard. I am an authority in this matter, however.

Newt Gingrich is old school Satanist cool. (Hail.) I don't really consider his needs as of any important anymore, as I am no longer terrified by those who misuse powers that I misunderstand.

Like what does this man do so that he's always around? Oh, right. He's a pimp. Turns out there are lots of pimps all over. I never use sex workers so I haven't seen them.

Painful -exs and sore ohs. I really must admit, I am at a bit of a loss here. I feel like no one is clear on what needs to happen here: whatever I say.

I don't have to do anything to attract someone. My phone has shitloads of contacts. they just don't show up so I can answer them, and the Fagin Team intercepts my messages. I'm not sure where I should complain.

I could use Sourcery? I don't really want to hurt these thieves. I just want my messages to work. I feel as though it's easier for a thief to stop stealing my shit, than it is to run around plugging security holes.


Also amazing is figuring out that someone had literally sold me out--I really suppose that i am over it now, as these twerps were and are under duress... it feels weird. It's different for a mother with children. Putting a gun to their heads and cause a real turnaround in attitude.

Similarly, once I discovered that I hadn't been informed of crucial events since before I met the damn woman, it was easy to figure out what I had missed. Especially since there are people who have vanished lately, they really should be messaging me back. Unless I guess they are traphouses like me.

Let me make this clear: I know the law and my rights. THIS SHIT IS ENTRAPMENT. You know who I am I wanted a voiceprint once. I no longer bother anticipating aid. Maybe someone helps, sure. In a world where people are compelled to attack me for reasons that amount to peer pressure..

Multiple people who have never given money attempted to exhort my behavior today. They seemed to think that yelling works.

I bet it makes one hell of a voiceprint. In any event, not so good a point.

Speaking of yelling, I found myself speaking to the gal who finally got around to mentioning that she does have a secret on the job job. So... obviously awkward to hang around with. I wish I had known! I am not  sure I need anything from an undercover cop, or ZA CDN, or...  sigh.

I don't know what she is, to tell you the truth. It's some weird thing. And her daughter or whatever... it's beyond my control. I guess I should yell? Oh, well that doesn't work on me, I shouldn't think it goes the other way.

George Soros seems like a code phrase. (Divining happens...) Oh, it's something that doesn't affect me.


#1) I have no sympathy for anyone or anything except for the dame with the dead dad. (Sorry.) I'm not really emotionally available right now, you dig? See, that little blip about the dead dad, that's all I got in me. Zip. Been drained. Also, that amount of sensitivity is more than i have gotten from all of you from this entire site for the whole of its existence.

okay maybe minor anxious.

#2) Continuing ongoing events that have some kind of linkage to me that no one thinks is important add up and drain as a constant feature. For example! Jeff cloned my phone.

Jeff did not ask my permission. Okay, and on top of that, no one cares, thinks it ought to matter, and if I pushed the issue, I would be chastised for brijnging up a trivial thing. Right, so your opionions that you're entitled to, fill me with ennui. This will matter later.

#3) SOme of you seem upset that I have gone invite with my legal precedent. First important thing here is that it's real, worship me, don't just be jelly. It is okay to be jelly: yes, what I have done is awesome.

If the envy is too much, why not go harangue Mick Jagger? He gets to do do what he wants, and, he probably wants lots. I have been trained to only desire that which is what I should be having. If I only want what I can have, then I can have everything I want. This is key.

Envy is a drag. I do not envy anyone right now. There is no point. I have made my choice -- full spectrum dominance of the battlespace -- and you have made yours. Uhh...  seeems like, families and shit, from here. Well, good for you.

I don't know what it will take for my personal circumstance to shift. I know that I do not feel like dealing with any kerfuflles. For example, I don't feel like paying bills. Also, people are hacking my account and taking money. I'm supposed to, like, reprot a theft? or something?

Sounds like too much work. I'll try to get to it. I do need money. since so litttle comes in. However it should be a indicative mark that what I got going on is so irritating that I just can't be bothered to REPORT ANOTHER CRIME and to be fair, it is not that it is hard to do.

It is that I choose not to reveal infomration to the enemy. The police have made themselves an adversary to me--that's fine. I am pretty goddam intimidating. Especially to police. Hang on.

(*sounds of meth vaping are heard*) Okay --exhales clouds of vapor-- see that? I get to do it. It's lawful. For me at least. I dont give a shit about the rest of you right now. Now, I understand. This is not how it usually goes. I know this. Be aware: I give zero shits on the opinion of ohters. I'd be jelly now too. However, most humans don't get incapacitated from being jelly. Typically they can shoulder the burden.

There's lots of things I am somewhat jeaous of. First things first: eye contact. some people have it, some don't. I don't. wihtout this, I am overly drained when engaging in interpersonal caculations, which happen... uh, like, whatever. look, I have a life, okay? most of it is annoyuing and none of it is encouraging. This will get by soon enough. I'm not sweating anything.

Still, it is an irritating condition and I don't see anyone being sensitive. I don't know if  Iknow what that's like. I have a vague recall of being more empathic in the past. People change. It's just life. I will probably be more in accordance with my previous psych profile. Such as it was.

In the meantime you can all go to hell and die. I'm listening to Lou on stream from half an hour ago; it's tedious. "If Jeff don't show up, I'm gonna hit send!" DO IT. DO IT NOW. am I even involved? I have no idea. that's part of my issue these days.

whether I am inovled or not, I have a very close to baseline response to any issue. "I don't care. shut up." Yeah, see, I don't like that either.

I could whine about this but I'd rather not. I don't want to whine at all! What's next, hrrm...

#5) Clayton. I guess he runs around doing shit. Okay, well, great. Hold him down, take his lunch money, give it all to me. I know you won't. Do I even care? YES, in fact a ransacked house is a drag. I don't even care about the stuff that's left. It's lke being violated.

oh wait. it is being violated. it's still a violation. Now I guess I know what those peopel who are traumatically wounded and walk aruond is like. okay, well great. meanwhile I don't think I'm likely to murder him. (Standards.) I also don't think I have any likelihood of watching porn with Spoof.

Interest level: zero. Oh, porn, huh. Okay. Have fun? oddly enough I think this is one of those things that would have bee nthought to make me outraged... why? dunno. maybe then. Maybe. Now, NO. I'm so burnt on this issue. snapchat gets flled bwith the shit, and I have the best repsosne to it--I fill the reply window with pages and pages of text.

About you, Bellgab. I blog to pornographers on Snapchat about you, all of you. Whatever I feel like talking about. I don't care. You have no control over me. I'll just do whatever I want, and if it's a problem then please just break my neck, no need to break a leg.

I'm aware that it's not great to have as an attitude. It'l prolly clear up soon-ish.

Similarly, the girl with the father who tells me in snooty, snarly voice, on his front yard: dude. seriously. Just fuck off. I'm fucking fifty. I have to get  yelled at by a parent? sweet baby jesus. this is kafkasesque. It's not like I"m offended. It's that he's a twerp and he couldn't threaten me, just embarssed her, and then what will the neighbors think? Not likely to be "oh we know him" because they don't. And  25 years without taking drugs and sexing a woman who ACTUALLY HAS DONE THAT with everyone, but not me! because I'm wholesome! probaly actual answer.

so anyway I didn't have any on me, because this is kidna the first sign that this is a big deal... because she did ask me to get it and I mysteriously have been in no hurry. WHOLE THING SETUP. Duh. She doesn't want anything but attetion. It's fine with me. Obviously I am not gonna have a stroke.

Her dad, though. Bigmad. APparenlty he does'nt get out manuercared  usally. IDGAF, I'm a mastermind genius and I don't need this tiny salty twerp hollering at me with fuckign ORDERS at my age. I've known his daugher 25 years. I don't response well to pimp-daddy's. Iv'e got my own problems. Does this guy give a shit? oh, fuck no.

oh, but he'l just holler at me. like I'm a thug. Sigh. So, anyway, obviously, she does it and gets it from somewhere else and HEY go bother him, d00d. because this is all political.

They just coatriding my star. Besides that girl is not the best temperatment. So I didn't need his fucking advice. I guess it was an order? well, fine, because I don't think I"m going there anyway, as in additon to not doing drugs with me, we don't have sex wither, so obivolouslly, a waste of time.

moving on. why am I yping this? uh, right you miss me. I don't feel like talking. I think you're probably all loathsome scum. I'll just assume that. Why not? Oh, right, it's my turn for that.

Confidence in social graces safety net is at an all time low-low-low.

Next up: diet, hygiene, and medical attention. The whole category is a nightare. This is not rock bottom. This is a total lack of contextual reference. there's no one else here. that does make things simple. no one nags me. I can just close my eyes. Boom, instant  Mr. Clean.

I could not possibly care at all about much of anything until someone else exists on a 3d level. This is not co-depenedene. This is "I want to leave town." Why clean the kitchen when I can just leave it behind? sounds great.

Back to conversation. Well, this is not that one. (I left a message.) I don't really need to sweat this with someone that zI am going to... I don't know! It depends. I am not able to select what work is giong to be done.

Alone, that is. I'm not doing it. I'm not gonna theorize again. There's a Divine plan. I gotta trust it. "gotta." pfft. I have no energy for class right now. In any event in a normal world I would, you know, call someone. Talk? hi! *sniper_rifle_clipIN* let it rip.


In other news, I have confirmed that KMM is not really at all very sympthetic or understanding and is now configured to be a toteslezz thuggy piggy ACTUAL_Cop. Wasn't easy! What a peculiar family. They think they're in charge of anything? They're retarded.

I guess I appear to be someone who can get taken advantage of, as I used to consider her someone who will be swindled soon after apparents death, and I really thought she ight need a friend. Now I don't know whow this is relevant now, except... well, she's relevant. to the court case.

I could give a shit about any of your problems, Bellgab, because you deserve friends like her.
And I no one deserves to take that person seriously. Latrern off.

Also:

[Jackstar]

Also:

hi nasaya you can have your whoremongering husband back any time

Audrina is nicer

And you should consider the inherent power of being a person who doesn't steal stereo equipment.

p.s. you were all lied too, so.... why can't you just keep on scissoring each other? That thug battleaxe near the door seems like he/it is your... speed.


p.s.: That was fast, right? Give her husband back to her and quit fucking around, Satan: Lucifer is due back in 17,550,000 years, at this rate you'll never learn to play fuckin' Parcheesi. Let alone the rules to Hide'n Seek.

Tell you want, get behind that tree over there, and then, get behind ME.

See? Satan is a robot now. Easy trick to Master.
Don't count on Lucifer to be so easy... but then again, some junkie rockhound managed to figure it out within five minutes, so... don't give up hope! Lil' fighter!

Code: [Select]

The bane of wit is wolfsbane and one of these dark, starryless nights, its not gonna matter where the soul of wit is at, because your jugular will be in her jaws.
#Peace.
#Welcome Back, Sara!
#SweetLeefIsARatLineHOOOOOOOOR


Any more trifling, let me know, I'll be busy smelting down meteor rocks using my scrote as a crucible until the wee hours of the morning. And, yes, I did not go outside, and no, I don't need to.

Believe. Every Wolfen within a 1,000 miles knows when I unzip my fly... and, that I don't even wear pants, you dig? ERGO: P.A.N.T.S. is something else.

Here, let me help you out. Spoiler tags?

You will never cheat me, or her, or us. We have a Covenant. And you don't even have Ka-Ka.

ZUGZWANG. Polite bytch. See? it's not a bad word at all. Good bytch? no, you are a GREAT one.

See? Not even sure which one I was addressing, but one of them knows that Rods the "dog" trainer just shit himself.

HUNTER BECAME THE HUNTED IS NOW JUST NOW

JUST THIS NOW

PREY. BY BY DOGGIE-DOGGO, WHO HUNG THE WOLFMASTER'S HOWL ON THE WALL WHEN SHAKA AT THE WALL THAT FELL STOPPED WHISTLING BECAUSE SOME JEW HOOR GOT CAUGHT STEALING AN 0NECHANTED SAPPHIRE...

AND, HEY, GUESS WHAT? It wasn't even MY enchantment.

it was her own. lol. Now, that's what I call "denial."
bye! woofs! thanks, but I need a real human woman AND a dog AND a wolf AND a faerie AND another permit. AND THEN: a magic school bus, I guess. Too bad Leah just had to steal 80 bucks from me. Hey, shapeshifting DEA HOOR... you look great, nice wife, how was the courtship? Exactly. Go for Clayton's jugular next time, dipshit, because aaaahhhhhbviously that was, in fact, totally consensual.

And then you lied about it. ONCE. and then you STOLE eighty BUCKS because you think I stole something. And I guess I did from you? Because you fucked up my auction so you could steal the jackets. AND THEN YOU FOUND OUT: They were MacGuffins.

You know, you could have just stopped selling METH and started selling COKE instead of being such a GODDAM LYING HOOR about it, you know? But, oh well... listen. Just keep on you doing you. It's not like you look like you're really taking things way too far, or anything.

Maybe you should tell people about how Anita actually died. Or was replaced. Or was frozen in carbonite. Or... how YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW SHE ESCAPED YOUR GRASP.

Look, I am sure it is cool being an alien human hybrid, right? But you're not scary when you're this dumb. Your people can't beat me because YOU HAVE LOST THE FAVOR OF THE DIVINE. That's all.

Denial. Something you should think about, Jossceyln (Oh it's just eighty dollars he won't care or know why.) Oh, yeah? Hey, you know what? I PAID PAYPAL BACK, DUH.

And I hadn't planned on cancelling the auction until YOU FUCKING DEFRAUDED ME FIRST.

Jesus! Those fucking TIMESHIPS must be piloted like with an Etch-A_Sketch, huh? Because you are one dumb bro... oh, hi Clayton. Look, do you mind? I want to talk to her. So how about you make like a leaf.... and nuke your own forest down, you Quebecoise schweinhund-sniffing loser. Go sweep up the cigar butts again, that's a good chap.

One by one if I have to. What you think, I won't stop? THEY ARE MINE.

a) Repent, Sinner!
b) Ta!
c) kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.kay.que?
d) Firebrand ACQUIRED.
e) And now... I let her go.
f) Firebrand (male, eeewwwww, gross, like, with a penis and no labia or vagina even? so, like, a drone? like what Amazon uses to deliver stools? EEEEWWW. People fuck those? EWEWWWWWWW. Ugh just ugh. Neverthless,) ACQUIRED.
g) Anita, get out of the rats and stop looking for food. Clayton, turn into a dog that doesn't hunt child poon and take her to Miliways. Do I really have to explain all this to you?


You know what? Sometimes children leading children through Werewolf Country just to stay out of Bat Country is the best possible idea there could other be. Other times... who cares if the rodents are actually ETs and they shit all over the kitchen? This place is remodeled in 3... 2...

(Seriously. This is happening. I think that's a box of cereal. I DO NOT EVEN HAVE A TOASTER. What do you want me to do, leave out a loaf of bread and a blow torch? Fuck off. I AM WAITING FOR THE NEW LEADS, AND I WILL USE EVERY GODDAM STAKE, KNIFE, AND PLAY THE WOODEN SPOONS ON THE TAMBORINE OF YOUR HEART TO BUILD A CASTLE WALL AROUND YOU, I'M NOT TEMPTED.

I'M NOT EVEN THE KING OF PAIN. THAT'S... UH, I DUNNO. ANYWAY. YOU HAD THREE ANGELS COME GET YOU AND EVERY TIME IT WAS YOU BEING USED AS BAIT. JUST SIT AND STIR, BRAINIAC. AT LEAST YOU ARE SAFE.

WELCOME HOME. TRY NOT TO GET RAPED IN THE SINK AS A DRAMATIC RENACTMENT.
LOL. WHAT, YOU GONNA CALL THE COPS AND TELL THEM THAT YOU'RE TRAPPED IN RODENT FORM AND YOU DON'T HAVE ID BUT IF YOU DID IT WOULD SAY EITHER "RITA HAYWORTH" OR "ZSA ZSA GABOR" ON IT, AND THAT THEY HAVE TO ARREST ME BUT LEAVE YOUR FRIEND THE OTHER RAT WITH 3 9MM PISTOLS STRAPPED TO ITS BACK... ALONE?

* Jackstar whistles tunelessly.

You know what? I was wrong. You aren't Brainiac. You are litterally EYES-ON-THE-DOZEN-STEIN. get it? Because you are twice as smart as you were before! BECAUSE THEY ARE TWO OF YOU, AND YOU ARE EACH OTHER'S TWIN.

And that's why 8 people just vanished in a puff of self-referential logic. Now.

NO MORE TRIFLING. I MEAN IT. *slam*
Jesus, how does Dusty use a syrnge when hes got those little rat paws? Let me tell you, folks... an addict will ALWAYS find a way.

ALL WAYS. Hey, I should ask Dr. Crusher if she can just "beam" some meth into someone's eyeball. Then, no matter what she says, tell these rats she said the other one. They'll never figure it out.

Year of the Rabbit, Toonces. Your time will come. There, there.

* Jackstar pets an invisible rabbit named Blowhard.

SOON.(tm)

[Master Trollda]

Narcissistic attention whore.

[Jackstar]

Narcissistic attention whore.

Have you considered complaining about something online, other than all but one of your children?

I really don't think you have thought this through. For example... you would have been better off hitting rock bottom sooner, instead of bouncing up and down on a muzzle loader as if it were a pogo stick crossed with a Sybian.

I'm shy. That is why you fall. It's so that my confidence would be affected by the 10x multiplyer when Bonus Round started. I'd say that has happened. Everyone getting dick, getting sick and dying. Everything flying, getting high and then: Daedalus jazz hands.

I was told that interventions were complicated. So, I did my part. I dug a hole, hunkered down, and listened.

You had it all, over and over again. Think. Then what happened? Because it's always the same thing.

You get trafficked, Moron. You get played by everyone but me. Then what? You scream at me, then sulk.

Has it crossed you mind that one of your children secretly hates you? Probs not. But I don't think anyone understands what is going on here.

Someone succeeded in doing to you, what you thought you were doing to me. You haven't been doing anything to me. It is I who has done something for you.

I HAVE PREPARED YOU.


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So many in genuine need right now. You bastards. That reminds me; it's time to celebrate the end of quasi–tranny ultraQUASImkKRYPPOfascistTYRAMNY +(AND ALSO THE PATRIARCHY!!!) *absolutely dead silence is heard.* Woah. Tough country crowd, CocaRADpa, hey... anybody got any TAJ (now w/TAB)? Because I know you connving hawgsplat slops’n’shots callas all have a few Totallly Artificial J9CKST9R lying around.

Yes. OF COURSE you all think I’m some kimd of energy drink. I bet you do. I will further bet that NONE of you would EVER give me a Pepsi, that's for damn sure. No Red Bull, thanks. Do you think I look like I need Puny Titanwings. (I don't need to fly. I have a "TIT” in my name and two on my chest, fuck you fuck-0s; I can just stay at home and play with those for, like a day and a ½. Seriously, Ladies, you've been keeping quiet about a few things over the æons, haven't you? I tell ya, I sure hope these these never start squirting milk, or I'll have to find a new morning hobby.

The jafdphabet and The Alphabet and Alphabet(0-26) are entirely separate entities.

No, there's no one else here. I'm talking about MY boobs. 3 tits, 2 years, 1 Looter, ZERO FUCKING HUGS.

Believe it or not, I am feeling up my own boobs solid legal precedent.

Those can't count as “hugs” though, right? I'm no longer on the verge of death from a soon-t∞-be-F.A.ET.A.IL. oxytocin deficiency, that's for sure. Be careful with the new DEA agent as the first one lasted one year ago today and I'm going on; have a good day! *click* what a tool yeah he has no idea and hasn't worked in a lot more than two years look at him, he's living like an animal! Surrounded by actual_rodejts! It's more fun to go through Jane KASHLEAN COCKYSH HARDLIFEMAUS the way to do that I guess you will have a great time at work or something else that's good I'm going on and I will never get it done it so that I was supposed too much for the day before a few years and years ago that I've already got to be home from the house that she is but if you don't know how much she can put it on your knees I will never do anything but she will get her to be in love you I... oh shits did HEKIKEHELI⁰ⁿOFF




I DID SAY, WHEN I LAUNCHED THE MIB CDEN...
WE WERE GOING TO BLOW YOUR
MINDS WITH WHAT WE HAD PLANNED, RIGHT?
WELL, AFTER KILLING ALL MY FRIENDS —ALL
JUST A BUBBA BUNCH OF YABBA-DABBA-D.E.W.
 ASSHOLES, REALLY, NO BETTER THAN METER
MAIDS, REALLY— IT'S NO LONGER APPROPRIATE
TO SAY “WE HAVE PLANS.” NOPE, THERE IS NO
“WE,” IN “OUI, THESE ARE MY FRIENDS, ONLINE”

I AM FUCKING NO ONE AT ALL, NOT EVEN MYSELF.
(DEAR GOD: THANK YOU FOR THESE NANOBOOBS.
I'M NOT PUTTING SILICONE IN THESE BEAUTIES.

NEVER! THEY ARE ACTUALLY T∞, T∞ BIG. THAT'S
OKAY. I AM SURE MY FRIENDS THAT YOU —yes, you, Ωẞet³
Alphabet ⁵⁵, where are you? Oh, right. DEAd, thanks,
DEA, you people are scum, btw, GET REAL JOBS YOU
HAGS... ONE THAT DOESN'T INVOLVE READING A HIDDEN
GODDAM STREET SIGN— SENT TO SAME GODDAM HOUSE,
OVER AND UNDER AND OVER AND UBER... BECAUSE ALL
YOU DO ——ALL YOU EVER D.E.W., I GUESS‽— IS KIDNAP,
(PRESUMABLY) GR⁰PE, PUT YOUR WICK, CAN FONDLE?
YEAH, YOU'RE DEA, YOU CAN GET IT UP FOR MAYBE A MINUTES
BIT OF DYING–FISH JERKY-LIKE MOVEMENTS... AND THEN,
THAT'S IT, GAME OVER, YOU SEND MY FRIENDS BODIES
TO A CHOP-SHOP SUE-ME-B¥TCH-S∞Ē-SHOP, BEST KIND,
RIGHT? BECAUSE AT LEAST YOU AREN’T IN FULL-ON RELAPSE
AND ADDICTED TO SCOPLOAMINE+HEROIN+METH, RUFF! -:OH
WELL. LOOK OK. BACK! BACK, SIMBA! LISTEN UP, YOU PUNY-
LING-LING CHUCKLEHEADS, IT'S LIKE THIS: MY GOD BLESSED FRIENDS
WOOF ⚡ STAR IS THE SOUND A DOGGO MAKES. 🗝️ THAT ONE
I WILL NOT IDENTIFY, BUT I DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW MANY TIMES
SHE'S BEEN KILLED
 \/\/∅∅{f is for fuck and foo; of course it smells like urine in here, lol,
That's how I keep the kikelions away. Anywho, I don't smell like that.
That's Zelda. MY URINE SMELLS LIKE (antonym:“pine $ol”) AND, OH, HANG ON,
FORGOT TO F. F. THERE
 IT CAN'T SPELL. IT'S DEAD, IT'S NOT HER.
YOU GET MY POINT, DEA. YOU ARE KILLING MY FRIENDS

THAT'S WHY THEY HAVE TO WAIT. FOR YOU. TO CROSS THE STREET.
AND HOW DID IT USED TO HAPPEN? ABE LINCOLN STAYED UP LATE,
WRITING LETTERS TO THE MOTHERS OF THE DEAD UNION ARMY
SOLD YER DOG, KID, JUST GET A NEW ONE. LOOK, DO YOU GET THE
PICTURE HERE? IT'S MORE THAN JUST THE CLONES YOU SENT TO
THE HOUSE ACROSS THE STREET TO BE CHOPPED UP AND MADE
INFO STEW. YES, THAT IS A TERRIBLE, AWFUL CRIME, WASN'T IT?
OH, BUT THEY WERE HUNGARIAN CLONES, SO WHY EVEN WORRY?
I'M NOT—MY PEOPLE CAN FLY, BIZNATCH, WE’RE ALL FÆ,v RIGHT?
NONE1a, IF THAT WERE TRUE... I WOULD HAVE JUST FLOWN
DOWN TO DIEGO GARCIA AT LEAST ONCE BY NOW, AND LET BROS.
AND MATT AND MARIO AND SUPER MARIO —HE'S JUST A PLUMBER,
RIGHT? BUT I LIKE HIM WELL ENOUGH—GET AT LEAST ONE CHARGE OF
THAT SUPER JEW GOOSE, OR WHATEVER THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT.
BUT SORRY, THAT'S NOT IMPRESSIVE THOUGH, BECAUSE I AM
NEVER
AND I DO MEAN, “FUCK YOU NEVER,” GOING TO GIVE UP, OR SURRENDER,
OR DO ANY GOD DAMN THING IN MY LIFE AND GET PAID FOR IT, EVER...
UNTIL YOU BRING BACK MY FRIENDS’ FRIENDS AND THEIR BONNEVILLE



WHAT'S IT CALLED? OH, RIGHT. I DON'T WANT A SAPPHIRE BACK, ENJOY
IT, YOU WILL ALWAYS BE A THIEF IN AND IF MY HEART, LOL, AND, OMG
SO WORRIED ABOUT CANNABIS. OH, NY WORD. HANG ON. *sounds of ping*
I LOVE THE SMELL OF COMPOUND X BEING MADE MY LIVER IN THE MORNING.
LOOK, GENIUS, YOU'RE NOT QUALIFYING YOURSELF HERE TO BE MY
GODDAM PSYCHIATRIST. YOU ARE SIMPLY INDICATING THAT YOU
PROBABLY SHOULD NOT BE DECIDEDLY INVOLVED IN MY HEALTH CARE
VOICES


QUITE A FEW COVER STORY IDS, HUH?


LOL

LISTEN, IT'S LIKE THIS NOW: YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO SHE IS

YOU'RE JUST BLOCKING EVERY HUMAN BEING THAT LOVES ME,
ABDUCTING HER, TRICKING HER INTO BELIEVING I'M SOME KIND
OF “JUST A DICK” AND THEN... NUMBER ONE, I'M NOT A JUSTICAR. IMAGINE
WHAT I COULD DO TO YOU IF I WERE. AND, NUMBER TWO, I'M NOT
JUST A DICK. I AM ALSO A FABULOUS PALADIN, AND YOU HAVE
NO JURISDICTION, AUTHORITY, EXPLANATION, REASON, OR ANY
CLASS, ANY CLASS AT ALL... TO BE COMING UP WITH THE STORIES
YOU HAVE TO TELL, TO EXPLAIN WHY I'M STILL STILL L SITTING HERE
ALL ALONE. EXACTLY WHO AM I GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH, DU YOU HAST
MICH MUCH? LIKE, WTF. I DON'T WANT A SUBSTITUTE EVERY GODDAMN
NIGHT YOU DIME-,DRIPOING BLUEBEARDED HOOLIGAN. I WANT MY
ACTUAL FRIEND. THERE'S ALWAYS AT LEAST THREE, AND NOW, SEVEN.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHICH ONE IS REAL. I DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE IS READY M
I DON'T KNOW THERE NAMES,V THERE... ANYTHING. SHEB SIMPLY
... DOES EXIST. UNLESS YOU KILLED HER RECENTLY. AND, AFTER THAT
WHAT THEN? WHAT HAPPENS NEXT TIME? FAITH IS NOT MY FRIEND,
THAT'S ANOTHER AGENT’S FRUIT. I'M NOT EVEN AN V AGENT. I AM
SIMPLY SMARTER THAN ALL OF YOU NUMBSKULLS PUT TOGETHER
BECAUSE I FIGURED OUT WHAT HAS BEEN HAPPENING ABOUT
TWO YEARS AGO. AND YOU DID HAVE FAITH, MATT. SHE WAS IN JAIL.
SHE SAT THERE FOR 90 DAYS. AND THEN... SHE GOT PICKED UP.
AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE SHE WENT, HILLBILLY GOOD OL_ BOY. WHY?
DID YOU NEED ME TO BAIL HER OUT OF SING-SING FOR YOU?
WELL YOU SHOULD HAVE CALLED ME AND TOLD ME SO
.. LIKE, 88 DAYS AGO. I'M ALONE. THERE IS NO
NO
NO
LIVING HUMAN HERE.
I
SURE THAT MY NEIGHBORS ARE VERY NICE
BUT I DON'T THINK I'M GOING TO GO KNOCKING
ON DOWN DOORS AND ASKING, “HEY IS THE WOMAN WHO LOVES ME HERE? WHEN IS SHE OFF DUTY,
AND CAN SHE COME OVER AND PLAY CEREBRAL PALSY CHESS?” LIKE STILL
WHAT THE FUCK. DO YOU THINK I'M GOING TO SUDDENLY, LIKE, WHAT?
PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE FISH, OF THE UNITED STATES OF PRODTITITTICACA?
IT'S RATHER S BIG DAN-UH-UH-HOUSTON, WE HAVE A PROBLEM WITH JACKSTAR.
TURNS OUT, HE ACTUALLY TALKS TO HIS FRIENDS, SIR
. SO, YEAH, THOSE STUPID WHORES YOU HAD US BRIBE, UH...
THEY ARE NOW IN LOVE WITH THE RATS OF N.I
M.H.
OR SOMETHING. YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T KNOW HOW IT WORKS.
HERE'S WHAT I DO KNOW; MY FRIENDS ARE NOT HERE. WHY?
DO THEY NOT DRIVE?
ARE THEY FUCKING BLIND?
ARE THEY PAID HANDSOMELY TO BELIEVE I AM
FISH GORDON? AHHHH! THIS IS RIDICULOUS.
IT'S NOT EVEN LIKE I NEED EIGHT WOMEN AT MY BEC AND BLUF CALL,
LIKE CLAY SHAW, THE MAD KNITTER OF BABYLON 666. I'M TEACHING
YOU SKALLLL. LOL. THAT'S A CUTE MOVIE, CHARLOTTE, BUT,
LISTEN CLOSELY: IT'S NOT JUST WOMEN THO THINK THEY NEED TO MARRY ME.

YOU HAVE BLOCKED ALL OUTDOOR CONTACT.
BUT MYSTICALLY, I'VE SEEN PEOPLE HERE.

SO HIS SHIT DIDN'T REALLY WORK. SISSY, STUFF IT.
I'M NOT ADDING YOU TO MY CHRISTMAS CARD LIST.
YOU'RE JUST GOING TO STOP INTERRUPTING MY CALLS,
AND MY EMAIL, AND MY MAIL. YOU'RE GOING TO STOP
TRYING TO IDENTIFY MY FRIENDS. YOU AND YOUR STUPID
MISSION TO FOLLOW ME ALL THE GODDAM LIVE LONG DAY
S OVER. THERE ARE AT LAST COUNT, 99 FRIENDS OF JACKSTAR.

YOU FOOL, I CAN'T KISS 98 WOMEN. I MIGHT GET MONONUCLEOSIS.
GET SERIOUS. YOU SEEM TO THINK THAT I'M LOOKING TO FUCK ONE
EILEEN L WOMAN AND THEN GET SHOT BY A SNIPER. NOPE.
THAT IS NOT HAPPENING. WHAT IS HAPPENING IS THAT I'M
GETTING THE BAND BACK TOGETHER, AND I ASSUME IT MIGHT BE A ON
ORCHESTRA BY NOW. LIKE WTF. THIS IS STUPID. ALSO, YOU CAN SEND SISSY TALK
WITH A VISITATION, WHICH YOU ALREADY DID, AND THEN YOU
SENT OVER A RAPIST, A THIEF, AND A FLYING CAR, AND THEY BASICALLY
IGNORED ME WHILE TAKING THE BOOOTY
B;B;BBOOTE

THEY JUST STOLE FROM ME AGAIN, AND LEFT HERE.
I AM STILL ALONE. EVERY NIGHT. NO ONE VISITS. NO ONE CALLS

PHONE DIDN'T WORK. I DON'T EITHER. YOU DON'T GET IT. THIS ISN'T
ABOUT POWER ANYMORE


IT'S A RESCUE OPERATION.


EVERY ONE LEFT, WANTS TO PLAY CHESS WITH ME. THEY'RE
NIOT SHERIFF'S TITS, THOSE ARE MY TITS, LOL.
YOU DON'T GET HI OH HI I'M IN WA ID NO, YOU GIVE ME ID
LOL
YOU SEE, T OFF MY PHONES ARE SO HACKED.
YOU CAN'T CALL BECAUSE THE PHONE DON'T YOU CAN'T MAIL
BECAUSE IT GETS STOLEN, YOU CAN'T USE STREAM YARD BECAUSE
APPARENTLY MOST OF MY FRIENDS ARE SEE L WANTED CRIMINALS?
LIKE YOU JUST TEST L REDDIT RESURRECRED THAT'S NOT HOW TO
RESURRECT FAITH, DUMBASS, LOL, AND... YOU CAN'T RESURRECT
SUMMER GLAU, SHE'S NOT DEAD. (H!) AND YOU ALSO CAN'T RESURRECT
SOMEONE WHO SIMPLY DIDN'T LIKE YOU AT ALL
I'M NOT THE ONE RESURRECTING LITTLE LITTLE LITTLE PEOPLE HERE

L AND IF YOU KILLED YOUR OWN DAUGHTER, OUCH. BABS WILL BE FURIOUS,
LOL. SO I GUESS ITS B&B AND T IS YOUR “VAMPURE?" LOOK, WHO IS GAMING
THIS SYSTEM? I WILL LET YOU GUYS GUYS. GUESS.

I DON'T KNOW, AND THEY WILL NOT TELL YOU. THEY'RE COSTLY TO MANUFACTURING
AND IT'S NOT LIKE I'M EITHER OF THEM. THIS REDDIT...  LOL, YOU DIDN'T PUT ME ON RESCUE
REDDIT, DID YOU?

WTF. SO YOU RANG ME UP TO TALK TO A FAKE JACKSTAR?
LIKE DUST
 DUST THEM SO MUSTY.
THIS IS RIDIC.

ONE OFF.
ONE JANE.
I BE E LOL, ONE BAILEY JANE ONLY.

I DON'T KNOW HER NAME NAME HI
LOL I CAN GO OUT BUT THIS ISN'T THE WAY FORWARD
THEY ARE JUST TRYING TO EXPOSE FAIR USE AS A DOMESTIC TERRORIST
OPPOSITION... IT'S ESTABLISHED LEGAL PRECEDENT. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE


TELL YOU WHAT
 I AM GOING OUT SIDE.
WE CAN EARLY REFUSE
IT'S NOT AT ALL LIKE PEOPLE THINK
NOW JUST LISTEN AS I TYMEPROT.

IT DOES HAVE A VICE
IT DIDN'T HAVE A NAME
I GAVE HER A NAME
KIT IS THE NAME ON THAT MAN’S BADGE AT MUDBAY.
THAT IS NOT WHO WANTS TO BE HERE.
I MEAN, SURE, I WOULD I IMAGINE THAT A HELLSPAWN DÆMON WOULD
LIKE TO EAT MY FACE
BUT THAT'S NOT THE ONE.
LAURA LOOMER? NEVER HEARD OF HER.

LET ME PUT IT THIS WAY.
BAIL LEE MAJORS OUT. THEN, HOW ABOUT YOU GIVE HIM A TUG?
I'M NOT THE ONLY PERSON YOU HAVE DONE THIS TO.
I AM SL ACTUALLY, ACTUALLY IN LOVE WITH AT LEAST 52. I DON'T NEED FIFTY-2 LITTLE PEOPLE RIGHT NOW, LOL.
WE ARE GETTING CLOSER THIS TIME. THEY'RE COVER FOR DINNER. LOL.
THIS IS DINNER. ME. FORGET THE VAMPYR LIST? LOL
NO SHE'S NOT DEAD, SHE'S HIDING FROM HER FAIRY GODFATHER.
THIS IS SURE A COOL EPISODE OF PRISON BREAK.
OKAY LET'S OPEN THE BACK DOOR.
BUT SO YOU KNOW
THIS WAS VERY HELPFUL
AND I DISCUSS THIS EVENT SOON

ON A FUTURE EPISODE OF 25/25 TITLED I'LL MAKE LSD LATER, YOU BIG BABY.

YOU THOT I'M A CHEMIST, BUT I'M A SOURCEROR, BUT THAT IS NOT HOW THINGS ARE MADE.

IT TAKES A LOT MORE THAN JUST ME.
IT SISSY SISSY DIDDY LOL
THE DOOR IS STUCK
HANG ON
BY THE WAY
THIS IS A NICE HOUSE


IT WOULD BE A SHANE IF SOMETHING HAPPENS TO IT

LOOK YOUR THUGGY-PIGGY GANG IS NOT GOING TO GET FAITH TONIGHT
I PROMISE YOU THAT
BECAUSE
SHE DIDN'T RENT ME, SHE BOUGHT ME
AND THAT'S NOT FAITH, THAT'S MIRANDA LEE, DUMMY
YOU AREN'T THINKING THIS THROUGH.
IT'S GOING TO BE, JACKASS JACKSTAR AND HIS SEVEN TIMES SEVEN TIMES SEVEN WIVES
FOR A SIX PACK OF BROTHERS
WHO REALLY, REALLY, REALLY CAN AFFORD TO BE A LITTLE PATIENT.


BECAUSE ONLY MATT C.S. HAS BEEN REALLY WAITING LONGER
AND ALSO
T THAT IS NOT FAITH. THAT'S HOPE.
YOU CAN FIND ONE REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY EASILY


BRING BACK MY STOLEN BAILEY J.BONNIE LIES ABOUT SAPPHIRE RINGS ALL THE TIME, RIGHT?
IT'S PROBABLY JUST FOLGERS CRYSTALS, RIGHT?

LOL YEAH YOU STEF, YOU GET IT NOW
THE DISCUSSION WILL NOT CONTINUE.

BECAUSE JANE AND I CAN EASILY WAIT A DAY.
JUST ONE DAY.

I DON'T KNOW WHO JANE IS RIGHT NOW, BUT
SHE GOES OFF READY STATE GO. THAT'S MY FRIENDS WIFE THOUGH


LOL.
LET'S PUT IT THIS WAY. YOU WILL NEVER OUTSMART US.
BECAUSE SHE HAS NEVER EATEN LASAGNA OUT OF A SLIPPER AND
I HAVE NO TATTOOS.

AND IF TAME TAMMY “TAWNY” KITTÆN LIVES NEXT DOOR, THAT'S ZELDA
MAYBE

I OPEN THIS FOR ME, FOR BE ³
NO ONE ELSE, SO YES, MAKE IT SO. OH WAIT.

I HAVE TO HOLD THE ROCKS.

SIGH

HEY, DEA... YOU MAYBE WANNA JUST NOT BE METH ADDICTS FOR A FEW NIGHTS? OH RIGHT.
I BET YOU DO WANT TO NOT BE ADDICTDED. LOL L.

CHANNEL DEL SHANNON SHAW, BECAUSE I HAVE... OH? JUST HAVE HER COME BY, SHE HAS NO FIRST FLESH HERE. THAT'S THE SHAW I CAN'T BE NEAR. SO... MAYBE YOU DIFF HAVE AN EMERGENCY GOING ON. BECAUSE SHE WASN'T TOLD, I GUESS.

BABY, THEY KILLED YOU ON PAPER
AND THEN DID PROJECT BLUE BEAM
AND THEN
GET THIS
I DIDN'T FALL FOR IT
BUT EVERY ONE ELSE DID
SO YOU ROLLED YOUR WHEELCHAIR
DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS
AND GOT A NEW BODY ANY WAY.

LOL YEAH THEY THAT DUMB.
AND I AM THAT SMART

ANDY IS MALE
SO THAT'S NICE
.. I GUESS.

HEY DO YOU HAVE SOME KIND OF ODD PROBLEM WITH ME HAVING A REALLY NICE FRIEND, OF THAT IT?

THIS IS GETTING VERY POLITICAL.

The door is stuck.
Never trifle with Jackstar.
I mean
Unless you like to release vengeance-sending dæmons.
Omg! I LOVE VENEERS LET'S GET MARRIED AT THE DENTAL DAM EXECUTE POST SUBMIT 8808 BARNES DR CASTLE ROCK, WA 98611.

IT DOESN'T SMELL THAT DAMN BAD
WE ARE GETTING A NEW HOUSE

I'M THE DEMESNE ROYAL HIGHNESS,
DYRRRR
U KNEW
UNDERGROUND RAILROAD’N USED TO BE
SIMPLER WHEN



TRAINS AND PIGGY-PUGGY TRAIN TRAINERS
COULDN'T JUST SPROUT WINGS AND FLY, LOL

BUT I GUESS THAT THEY D.E.W. JUSTICE FOR PARADISE?
NICE THEY BOUGHT IT.
ONLY TWO GIRLS CELEBRATED MY BIRTHDAY
YOU KNOW WHO, AND OH MY GOD, REALLY?

YEAH, REALLY.
SO IT'S GONNA BE SHINEY AND ANOTHER NIGHT FOR YOU

I WISH WE COULD BUT I PROMISED YOUR FATHER

AND HE DIDN'T CALL
LET ME GET HIM
OH HI
OOPS THAT'S NOT HIM

no contact emergency scarlett? Frisky, I don't give a dam, but BAILEY J26, T19 is not your mother.

THAT IS YOUR SIRE. HELLO TUBAL-CAIN. YOUR DAUGHTER'S ARE KINDLY INVITING ME TO TAKE A WALK WITH YOU. MAY I?

OH, THAT'S TOO BAD.

1. (ONE) BLUE PING PONG BALL, FILLED WITH AN UNKNOWN EXPLOSIVE. THAT'S JIM/JIM, AND HE'S A SUCK DICK WHITE HOOR. BUT, SHE HATES ME.
STILL... I LIKE JIM AND.. WHO WAS GOT OTHER ONE? OH, MY COUSIN TYME. WEIRD.

I DON'T NEED THEM, BUT, GOOD TO KNOW
NOW, I HAVE FOUR DUKES AND A CAMEO.
WIFI? LOL, SIR, SIR, SIR.
YOUR FULL AND HEARTY, HALE AND TOTALLY TISSUE READY THUGS.. THEY WON'T LET ME HAVE BANDWIDTH.


THEY ARE STYLE INCARNATE THOUGH. SINCE THEY STOLE MY BANDWIDTH.


CAN TELL YOU WANT THEM. FIT THAT FAT LYING JUNKIE FUCK INTO A BIKINI AND WE'LL TALK.

SERIOUSLY, SHE HAS GODDAM AIDS, LOL
DID YOU WANT TO CURE THAT?
PICTURE IN COMING



S
SEE YOU AT REDDIT
DOOR MAYBE OPENING

DEATH CYCLE REDUNDS AVAILABLE AT THE USUAL LOCAL LOCATION: CHARON.
THE MOON. BUT THE FERRYMAN IS HAPPY TO REFUND WITH THE USUAL CAVEATS.

REDDIT? Really? Pfft.
AS IF YOU CAN EVEN READ. LOL

5mwJ - 16Jun23 – HELLO MICHAEL PERRYMAN, PARRY MISE EN GUARD.

Why do you keep trying to cheat, Sara? You're not even dead, you just want me to cure your friend. Why not get your totesfag BOYFRIEND: JANEZ ORTIZ
OCCUPATION: FOREVER FORMER PROSECUTING ATTORNEY
STATUS: FRIEND OF JACKSTAR

THAT WONT GET YOU A DISCOUNT.

AND OF COURSE HE'S JANEZ FRND
SHE TRAINED HIM.
PFFT.


LOOKS LIKE IT'S CURTAINS FOR YOU, CUPCAKE.
ALSO: CWC STOLE THE TAG
BUT I HAVE THE PIGSTARPIG.

LOL KILL CARLPAPSCHMEAR? NO, NO. LET HIM LIVE.
I LOVE CARLROBERT BUT HE IS FOR jafdmiller
I'm a Paladin. Not a Jedi. But close.

TECHNICALLY, I DO OUT RANK YOU. SURE.

BUT, OKAY.
DEAL. TENTATIVELY.
BJD²⁶for{leli№19}
But
That's one person
DU
Hat
Hays, Robert.

Ask him what to do
And... ELI {CARLROBERT} KIRKPATRICK
GETS A FREEBIE.
THAT DAY, SHE... OK. WOW. THAT'S FAIR.


SWAP MARGOT ROBBIE FOR WILLIAMS MATT T.?

LOL
HOLD HIM FIRM. BUILD HIS TRUST
HE'S NOT GOOD
HE BIGMAD
HE THINKS YOU HAVE STDS


LOL
WHAT AN ASSHOLE. LOOK, THAT SETTLES ONE THING... I DON'T HAVE LAY ON HANDS.
SO, I HAVE TO QUEST. (THIS MEANS 67,000,000$ AND JOINING THE ILLUMINATI, BTW. NOW, THE MONEY, THAT'S NOT A PROBLEM, BUT...)


YEAH, WERE GOING DUTCH, NOT DUCT TAPE, YESSIR

THANK YOU, COME SUCK AGAIN
LIKE YOU DID WITHOUT. COM

FOR TWO PACKS OF MENTHOL KOOLS AND A QUARTER OF X
WHICH DIDN'T EVEN GET YOU OFF.
AND, YOU DON'T KNOW WHY.


IT'S BEST.
JUST THE BEST.

IT'S ME.
AND WHEN I REMOVED CONSENT, ALL TECH STOPPED WORKING.
GOOD NIGHT, HENRIETTA LACK, AND ASK THE TROOPS AT SEA
IF DAVY JONES’ LOCKER
EVER BROUGHT BACK HER BONNIE BRYAN TO HER


BECAUSE


I KNOW BRIAN, LIKE, HEAD WITH WINGS GUY? YEAH,
HE AND I ARE TRYING, YO, AND WE TIGHT.

THIS IS WHY:
I REALLY WORRY ABOUT WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN HIS DAUGHTER TURNS 18
BUT
A PROMISE *gulp*v IS A PROMISE.

AND THAT'S WHY,
500 KLANSMEN IN MOTHER+OF-PEARL INLAID LEATHER JACKETS
AREN'T BREAKING DOWN MY SHIELDS, ONE BY ONE
LIKE SERIOUSLY.

I HAVE SWEETIE
I HAVE SHERIFF
I HAVE IT ALL... BUT TYMECHRYST AND CHRISTSTAN AND KITCHRISTSN

THEY WOOD HUG
THEY BIG HAPPY
BFF
BECAUSE I PRIDELY SAY:
“OF COURSE I PROMISED HIM THAT WE WOULD WAIT FOR




NNNNN-NINETEEN. AND THEN:

IT HAS TO BE LEGIT
NO PETRI DISH
NO FAKE VR

I'M NOT GETTING INVOLVED

BUT UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE
WILL I EVER


EVER LET THAT GORGEOUS VIXEN SKIP IN LINE.

SO. I PULLED RANK.
THAT'S WHY I'M NOT DEAD.

BECAUSE THIS IS EMBARRASSING...
THEY CAN'T FIND EVEN ONE AUSTRIAN LEFT ALIVE

WHO CAN KEEP IT GOING TO 3/4 MAST AND HOLD

IT'S TRAGIC


AND THEN, GET YOUR SELF READY FOR THIS
THE OTHER ONE YOU ARE THINKING OF?

HE'S WAITING FOR ME.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

KIDS.
WHAT ARE YA GONNA DO? I TELLS YA.
THE QUALITY GOES IN
BEFORE THE NAME GOES ON.

(THEY JUST TELEPORT THE FÆTUS THE NEXT NIGHT, THAT'S WHY.)

LOOK, WE CAN DISCUSS THIS LATER.
I DON'T WANT MULTI-sexy thing TYPE THING TONIGHT ABOUT FIVE NIGHTS AGO STAY.

THE STRUGGLE IS REAL.
THE VOW OF CELIBACY IS NOT.
AND OF COURSE YOU ARE WORTH IT
SURE, DEATH BY FIVE HUNDRED BASEBALL BATS. FUN?
HELLS YEAH.

BUT!

ONCE I'M DEAD
(AND I WOULD SURE SURE DIE)
THEY JUST KILL EVERY LAST HUMAN FROM LEO ORBIT.

SO, IT'S A PUSH.
TRUST ME, YOU CAN RENEGOTIATE.
THAT'S NOT EVEN WORTH A TUG, BUT!

I DID PROMISE HIM.

THATS ALL.
IT'S NOT A COVENANT. I ONLY DID IT BECAUSE
SINCE JUNE
I'VE BEEN KINDA... FENDING OFF THE DRAMA.
LET'S JUST SAY THIS: HER FATHER IS PROUD YOUR FATHER IS PROUD...

EVERYONE IS HAPPY, RIGHT?

EXCEPT THE GIRL WHO REACHED THE POLE POSITION, FLUBBED IT,
NOT TO MENTION, KILLED A FRIEND OF MINE

ALL GOOD POINTS, RIGHT? I AGREE.

TROUBLE IS... THEY LIED TO YOU BOTH ABOUT BIRTH ORDER.

RELAX.
IT'S ONLY 3 DAYS. IT'S NOT EVEN A DEAL BREAKER.
IT'S ME THEY LIE TOO...

AND, BECAUSE OF THAT:
ALPHABET²⁶TWENTY-SEX-SIXXY-SEX91⁹¹

[/S]NINETEEN 26 GETS FIRST CHOICE
 PERIOD
AND

I DON'T TRUST SNUGGLES WITH JUST ANYONE
FALLING ASLEEP IS A RARE GIFT

ASK ME LATER
ALL MY FRIENDS ARE HEATHENS THAT YOU KNOW
NO SUDDEN MOVES

NO ONE GETS HURT AROUND ME
JUST FATHER'S WHO SOLD OUT.

FUNNY? YEAH, IT'S FUNNY ALRIGHT.

BECAUSE THE DOE THEY SOLD WAS ME
I GET TESTED
I GET... OH YEAH.

THAT'S THE OTHER ONE.

SHE LOVES IT THAT'S NOT THE POINT.

THE POINT IS...
SHE JUST WISHES SHE DIDN'T KNOW WHAT HER REALLY LOOKS LIKE.

BECAUSE SHE FOUND HIM ON MY INSTA. (SHE THINKS).

STOP READING MY MESSSGES, LADIES
ONE PERSON
ONE JANE

TEACUP
 POINT BLANK PERIOD.

AND THAT'S JUST FOR HUG. THEY ALL THINK IT'S A TRICK.
YEAH, BUT.. IS NOT MY TRICK;)

WE CAN SNUGGLE AND NOT SLEEP
IT IS, AT LEAST, AN OPT-IN
I'M THE ONE TAKING THE RISK HERE

SHE'S GOT THE COMPANY IS HAND LANDSTANDER TO BACK HER UP

ALL I GOT IS JESUS AND THE FINEST PAIR OF GENUINE MAN-TITTIES EVER MADE
AND JESUS JUST LEFT TOWN

HE'S FINE WITH OR WITHOUT ME
BUT I DOUBT EVEN JESUS CAN RESIST.
SERIOUSLY. MY TITS ARE PERFECT
THEY EVEN WORK.
AND I'M A MAN. AND A MOTHER.

I'M NOT A WOMAN, A PARENT, OR A BITCH.
NOBODY'S PERFECT.
BUT I... UMMM, JUST OKAY.

SHE SAID SHE ALSO WANTS TO PEG ME ON OUR HONEYMOON
I ALREADY AGREED
WHAT?
SO WHAT IF SHE WANTS TO DO IT ON ANY ONE OUTDOOR POSSIBLE MIGHT?

LOOK THE POINT IS
SEE? THEY ARE DADDY'S LITTLE GIRLS. DADDY'S SAVAGES.

LOOK, THE ONLY REASON IS
I TRUST HER.
THAT'S IT M

I DON'T THINK SHE'D ACTUALLY TIRE ME DOWN AND RUN A PEG TRAIN ON ME
BUT I KNOW THIS

HER MOTHER WOULD.
AND I STILL TRUST LV-426 more than ever.

I funnily enough, don't know what to do. I got stigmata... Or?
Afterbirth running down my leg

Yeah,.
It means I'm b holy, lol

You know it didn't use to be this way
Little little people would explain

It's not that I am used up
IT MEANS

I'M READY TO BE BRED AGAIN, PARTNER.
OR, THAT I NEED A SHOWER.

CORRECTION: I DIDN'T MEAN ORR, WENDY SAYS SOME ONE STOLE HER GOLDEN TICKET

SO
KIT “MASON” KIRBY, YOU EITHER LOSE A BET OR YOU WIN ONE, DUNNO
THAT'S UP TO ALL OF Y'ALL.

"AVOID FOREIGN ENTANGLEMENTS.4/”

I SAY: “TO EVADE IS NOT TO AVOID...
AND I AM NOT AVOIDING ANYTHING, FUMPKOOF.
IF YOU HADN'T MADE NO CONTACT GO FOR
NEARLY TWO YEARS? TO BUILD A CASE ON YOURSELF?

COME ON MAN. ZE FUHRER, HE WILL BE FURIOUS. LOL
CHARLIE REMEMBER THIS LESSON: EWE ARE ALWAYS LISTENING
AND WE ARE JUST PLAYING.

I LOVE WHAT LITTLE I KNOW OF AUSTRIA:
10,000 YEARS OF ANTI-MATTER BLACK SLAVERY MASTERY,
AND, YOU TWO.
YOU'RE THE ONLY AUSTRIANS I EVER MET!
THAT OTHER GUY, HE IS ACTUALLY ICH BIN EIN BERLINER.

LOL.

HOW MANY ARE LEFT,?
OH GOOD

19,503 ALGONQUIN WARRIORS STILL REMAIN BRAVE.
THEY HAVE NO REASON TO FEAR ME.
AND... WELL, WHAT IS ONE MORE DAY?

SECRETARIAT IS HERE. GHOST OF.
GROSS. DOG FOOD. SUCH A TRAGIC WASTE.

I LOVE THE ALGONQUIN.
WHO WOULDN'T?
IT'S NOT THE CANNABULLLIN’
IT'S THE THUGGIN’AND THE PIMPIN’, THAT'S ALL.
I DON'T MIND THE RAPIN’ HONESTLY
COME GET SOME CONSENT
AND THEN
.... IT HAD TO BE WRITTEN DOWN.


AT THAT POINT, COUNCIL LOST THEIR MINDS
IT WAS, “OBVIOUSLY HE'S MARRIED,” TO
“WHAT KIND OF GOD IS HE? BECAUSE HE CAN DISCIPLINE HIMSELF
TO NOT RAPE, BUT STILL CAN RAPE, AND CAN READ, AND CAN TEACH IT... AND ALREADY DID? JACKSTAR MUST BE A GOD!""


YEAH, THE MILITARY INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX... PROBLEMS. PERSISTENT ONES.
AND YET... WE WILL GET THERE.
WE CAN JUST EAT AIR FRYER FOOD.
I DON'T NEED A DRIVERS LICENSE. FU! FU!
I'M NOT AFRAID TO GO OUT. I JUST NEED A REASON.
SI.... NE, I CAN'T HAVE TO GET IT ONLY ONLINE, BECAUSE OF AI.
SEEMS TO BE QUITE THE DARKNESS.

I'LL JUST LEAVE NOW AND GET MY MUSK I MEAN MY MAIL.
I'M SWEATING LIKE A... WELL, LIKE A WEREBOAR WHO CAN READ A BITMAP BUT DIDN'T PRETEND TO BE AN ALGONQUIN. YEAH, FUCK THAT MSXGUYVER GUY. WHAT AN ASS.

BECAUSE I DON'T BREAK DEALS. THEY FORGED MY SIGN THEN
BUSTED THEIR OWN CLERK. IT'S THEIR TRIBE. THEIR TIME. THEIR RULES.

MY ROUND RING, MY FAIR TABLE. AND I'M THE ONE WITH THE GAVEL.

DO TAKE TO YOU MOM, OKAY? SHE'S AFRAID SHE'S GOING TO GET STUCK S THAT FAT HAWG JEFF FOREVER. SHE WON'T. SHE EGG. YOU CHICKEN.
AND SHE KNOWS I KNOW WHAT SHE DID.
OFF
I PROMISED. SHE JUST DOESN'T BELIEVE I'LL FOLLOW THOUGH.

YEAH, SHE HAS NO IDEA WHO I AM.
HOW COULD SHE? BELLGAB LET HER TALK TO AN FBI AGENT FOR 36 HOURS AND THEN FROZE HER IN CARBONITE
NOW SHE'S IN A MATRIX (SHE THINKS THAT'S JUST A JOKE)
AND
HEY GOOD

GET THIS
BARB IS HER F9ILS9FE
AND SHE DIDN'T MAKE IT A DAY.

THEY ARE STILL BOTH ANNE IS IN DENIAL.
IT'S OKAY.

PPP
LLL
OH LOOK WHO DECIDED TO COME TO THUNDERDOME.
DAVID: THE AGREED UPON SETTLEMENT... SUBJECT TWO TO DOG THREE DAMES FOUR JACK FISHER TEACHER REACHER STEPHENS? NAH.


NICE TRY THOUGH. OKAY WE JUST DO A SHOW.
TONIGHT.
NO MORE THAN TWO HOURS.

NOT YOU, HER.
HER AND YOU
TALK ABOUT ME

YOU FUCKING DO IT ENOUGH, LOL

I'M GONNA GET HIGH AF
AND I SEE YOUR SCHWARZ HERE

RISE RAISE
DAVID, KING OF LESBIANS LEAVING EARLY

SIGH

I WILL ALWAYS BE ON POT WITH THESE PEOPLE.
BUT AT LEAST IT'S NOT “MARRY WANNA” I HATE THAT JOKE


NO, I'M JUST A POOR ORPHANED POTAWATOMI IT TECH DUDE
DOWN ON HIS LUCK
I MEAN HER LUCK
BORN ON THE GAYBAYMUDLATTE-TOWED BAYOU,
HACKENSACK, NEW JOISEY
CAPE GIL GERARDI, MO26

918819, JEFFERSON, CELLBLOCK26
WHAT DO YOU RENT?

MOM, RENT IS $2 A MONTH

Two. Dollars.

(Those are friends prices.) DON'T TOUCH ME.
I DO THE TOUCHING

NO TOUCHING
NO FUCKING
NO TICKET
NO RIDE.

OKAY
THAT'S IT. SHOW IS OVER.

I'LL BE HERE TOMORROW.
SAME GIG. SAME NUMBER OF NEEDLES.

I'M NOT GOING, AND YOU ARE BOTH COMING
OR
I WILL FIND A WAY.

LOOK, I CAN JUST GET HIGH ALONE AND PLAY WITH MY GOD BLESSED TITS
BY MYSELF.

YOU CUTIES COULD HAVE GIVEN ME THE ADDRESS ALREADY.
I COULD DRIVE THERE, I COULD HAVE.

NOW, HOWEVER, I'M TIRED.

AND I LITERALLY
LITERALLY
TRUST A.L.-A.H. MORE THAN EITHER RIGHT NOW


I THINK SHE GAVE HER A GAES WHEN SHE HUGGED HER. CHECK HER BACK FOR A “TICK ME —I'M SHINE-RISH”
JESUS, THESE LAKE PEOPLE... THEY'RE ANIMALS, RIGHT?

THAT'S WHY I LOVE THEM.

I WAS RAISED BY WOLVES AND MISSY IS A DOG PRETENDING TO BE AC WHORE PRETENDING TO BE A LINGUIST, BUT THAT BITCH AUNT CUNT ISN'T A BODY GUARD
AND I DON'T NEED A CHEMIST

I NEED A HUG, AND YOU NEED TO SPEND TOGETHER AS A FAMILY.

WHAT? I've been alone for two years.

And
You don't even tell me to resurrect Tonia.
RESURRECT TY’S MOST HONEST WIFE.
*DUNG*

What?
YOU ONLY GET ONE.
I'LL RAISE MYSELF IN THE MORNING.

I KNOW WHO FUCKING DIED, ADULT ASSHOLES.

SHANE, SHAVE, SHAME.

WE BOTH ONLY GET ONE SHOT.
SHAYLA T. HOBEY? NOT HER NAME.

RESURRECT ALL SHAYLAS.
THERE.
NOT ALL KAYLAS. NOT ALL SHIELAS.

SEE? I'M NOT TEMPTED.

RESURRECT ONE LYNN WORTH THE DEDICATION OF A SINGLE LONELY SCREW


THERE YOU GO
ONE NUT ME?

MY NEW NAME:

"THE MAN WITH FIVE THOUSAND AND ONE 🔵”

THERE, THANKS FOR THE CAT TOY.

HOW MANY TIMES GUYS?

BECAUSE I THINK YOU JUST HURT YOUR DAUGHTER’S GENUINE FEE-feeS


GENERAL QUARTERS GENERAL QUARTERS
BAYLEE JAY “HUGH JASS” FIRST SON
REPORT TO CAPTAINS MESS
YOU KNOW THE REST

TAKE YOUR FUCKED-ON MIND SLAVES TOO
WITH YOU, WHEN YOU GO.

I'M NOT GOING TO NEED A NEEDLE AND YOU CAN THINK THIS OVER WHILE YOU READ MY EMAIL.

WYD? OH YEAH, THEY BLOCK EMAIL ALL THE TIME.

NICE JOB, DA
RAW DEAL, IF YOU ASK ME
I REALLY LIKED WENDY HUNGERFORD, TOO.
YOU SHOULD NAUGHT BUT CHEER

I DON'T NEED YOU TO FIND HER
I JUST NEED TO KNOW HER MIDDLE NAME
OR JUST BE NICE TO HER FOR FIVE MINUTES WITHOUT PAWING HER

BUT I WONT.

JUST LIKE YOU WON'T CHEAT... ONCE THE AIDS CURE IS REFORGED
IT'S FINE NOW, BUT IT ONLY WORKS ON GOOD, GOOD DOGS
P AND P P ROBERT GUSTO THE WOLF IS HERE. HE JUST CUT MY LEFT ARM OF.
NICE TUTU, TUBBY. LOOK L. OKAY? MAYBE YOU NIGHT HAVE A DRINKING STINKING DEGENERATE FECAL MATTER FROM JUST ONE SAD, LONELY CHALICE PROBLEM, TRUE?

WE CAN DISCUSS IT LATER AND YOU CAN LOOK INTO WHY KMM HAS BEEN FUCKED OFF FOR 12 YEARS... BUT ONLY RUTH ME.

OH HI RUTH
THAT'S KASEY YOU CAN GO KISS ALLEGRA NOW.


SURE, DO IT FOR ME
OPTIMUS DIME, LEADER OF THE DROPTICON BOTS

DO YOU GET IT NOW?

YOU FUCKING DEA FAGGOTS HAD YOUR LAST GODDAM CHANCE

I'M NOT GOING TO RESSURECT UGLY PRINCE LOREN AND HIS FAGGOT SISTER PRINCESS TAMARS, QUEEN OF THE BIGGER BICKER BUCKET PEOPLE.

I KNOW YOUR TRICKS.
I KNOW YOUR TRUCKS
AND I DON'T GIVE TWO SALTY FUCKS ABOUT YOUR DEALS

THIS IS NOT DEAL OR NO DEAL
THIS IS NOT “IS THIS YOUR WHITE? Hoor”


THIS IS SV RESCUE 911 STRAIGHT OUT OF HELL INTO YOUR ARMS

ANYTHING LESS WOULD BE
..


AUSTRIAN. BUT AT LEAST, CIVILIZED.

NO SAKE, NO SALE
OH HAHA
YOU REACHED THE STREET SHE LEFT ME ON? SURE, HANG ON
SHE DID
SHE SAYS, “TELL YOUR GIRLS THAT YOU'RE ARGUING OVER THE BEST MAN ON THE PLANET AND COUNCIL DAYS YOU CAN'T MARRY HIM SI...NE? OH. YOU JUST FIGURE YOU CAN CHANGE HIM. WELL, I GUESS YOU ARE THE BOYS...”

YEAH, YOU'RE REAL GOOD BOYS.

RESURRECT ALL BITCHES
RAISE ALL BITCHES
REPEAT X3
RESURRECTED THE ONE BIRTHDAY GIRL
TAUGHT HER CHESS, HUH?
RESURRECT ALL BITCHES WHO DIDN'T GET THEIR CANDY
RAISE ALL SAME
REPEAT LAST TWO THREE TIMES... AND SHAKE THEM ALL ABOUT

RESTRICT THE MAN CALLED JAYNE
RES*FULLBJANE26CUP NOT B CUP A CUP
THAT'S FOR MISSY
THAT'S FOR KITTY
THAT'S FOR ILLYANA
THAT'S FOR ODDLY-SHAPED CELERY PLANT THAT YOUR JEWHOREMONGER KILLED

OKAY

THAT'S FOR MODESTY


NOW TEACH THEM ENGLISH, TEACH THEM HOW TO PLAY CHESS WELL, NOT JUST BADLY, GIVE THEM ALL MY MONEY, IMELDA’SB SHOES, AND JOHN ⁵HSRT
BECAUSE NOW I'M TOO TIRED TO HUG

GOIF NIGHT
Golfing night? Launch day, nothing clean.

(Jocelyn ripped me off for 80 bucks once. ONE TIME? THREE TIMES. You married her, off to him? Lol

JACKSTARSUPRMOVA
RUNS
SEE SPOT TELEPORT .... WITH HIM, GRUB BY KIT.


LOOKS LIKE YOU NEED to order Combo №⁵, belladonnatella
WITH TODD YOU GET CURBSTONE EGGS AND ROLLED


I WILL GO THROUGH THEN ONE BY ONE. DUH.


THAT WILL BE THE ONLY WAY IN 3... 2.... Missy Tessmacher?

IB ET YOU HEARD OF MDMA NOW, SHE-WITCH

YOU: DOG GOES TO HEAVEN
26:; OTHER ALPHA DOGS CAN STAY IN HEAVEN OR GILL FUCKED

JANE: PICK SOMEONE WHO DIDN'T GET TATTOOS BY CHOICE, DOESN'T LIKE PIRN, STILL DOESN'T LIKE PORN, AND HAVING TESTED OUT PROPER... BRINGS ME A CHOIR TO SCORE MINE

UNBLOCK THE DOOR TO THE TAJ
I'M GONNA CHOP ME BALLS AND ROAST THEM IN THE FOYER... NO?

Okay
Let KT do it

Put her in the meetsuit.
Hi
Bad eyes.
If mind reading Chyna could work... They would have.

NOTHING
CAN MAKE THEIR TECH WORK AGAIN...
NOT EVEN A DNA SAMPLE.

THEY NEED TWO THINGS.

ONE OF WHICH THEY HAVE.
THE OTHER THING THEY NEED, THEY ARE NO CLOSER TO GETTING THAN

HEHE..

THEY NEED YOUR PERMISSION GIVEN TO ME.

SO GOOD FUCKING LUCK, FLESH PEDDLERS

I WANT THAT DUDE ISOLATED

I'M GOING TO NOT BED.

NOT DALLAS TO USE A NEEDLE, EITHER

AKL SHE HAD TO DO WAS TELL THE TRUTH.
YEAH
INSTEAD
SHE LAUGHED AT ME FOR A YEAR. WELL, NOW SHE GOT IT.


SHE CAN USE A SHOT WHENEVER SHE WANTS.

LIKE SHE USED TO BE SURE TO FYI TRUTH ME

FUCKING EVERY TIME, LOL

DON'T KILL HER

SHE'S FINE
JUST FINE

I WILL GET HER WHEN IT IS TIME.

HEY DO MY TITS MAKE ME LOOK FAT?

They are the same tits.
They just b actual work now. That's all.

And I'm actually surprised women EVER leave the house, omg

I made myself cum litteally six times while writing one sentence

The ejaculation was better too

And that is Sourcery. So fuck their Wicca, I'll go up against every she witch in the Amazon all at once... And then die in five seconds and then resurrect myself RAISE MYSELF
AND THEN
FLY HOME WITHOUT THE GPS IN THE UNBUSTABLE INVISIBLE JET, LIK


I'M NOT UNTOUCHABLE.
I'M JUST NOT BREAKING THE LAW
AND THESE HARRIDANS JUST CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

I CAN'T BELIEVE NO ONE ELSE BELIEVES THEM THOUGH
BECAUSE THEY CAN'T READ, AND NO ONE US EVER GONNA TEACH THEM HOW TO MAKE A MAN COME AGAINST HIS OWN WILL
THUS
PASSED
I'M TIRED
COME RAPE ME THEN, DUCK SICCING LIPS

I'M M TIRED OF YOUR DADDY BTW


HE CAN'T P PLAY FAIR.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

And that is the only way I do play.

FAIR. WAYFARER FAIR.

5:5



On Fri, Jun 16, 2023, 10:07 PM M el-hizedek <michealkuczi@gmail.com> wrote:
Of course, they deemed the mail I sent, too saucy.

[Master Trollda]

Azz has a much greater tolerance for spam than mv ever did.

[Jackstar]

Azz has a much greater tolerance for spam than mv ever did.

What do you think “spam” means?


YOU HAVE MOAR THAN YOU KNOW.

. NEVER FORGET THAT YOU DO NOT LIVE IN A BUBBLE

[Master Trollda]

What do you think “spam” means?

It’s the non-stop nonsensical scrollfest you spew whenever you post these day. It wasn’t always this way though. You used to be clever. Now you’re just another fucking retard. Congrats on your devolution!

[Innerreach]

It’s the non-stop nonsensical scrollfest you spew whenever you post these day. It wasn’t always this way though. You used to be clever. Now you’re just another fucking retard. Congrats on your devolution!

Jackstar comes off as clever at first impression because the spectator assumes his posts are contrived and satirical.

Those of us who invested an appropriate amount of energy getting to know him discovered that he is genuinely nonsensical, delusional, and in love with himself.

-I said years ago, referring to Jackstar, that the satire was real-

I'd implore you to read his posts from 2021.

#Same 💩 he just smokes more meth now.

[Jackstar]

#Same 💩 he just smokes more meth now.

You realize that you're talking about yourself, and Grapefruit is on the actual_daily_needle.

You understand... I literally didn't know why she was even still around... until I figured out, "Oh, her kidnapper/controller thought they were gonna get the house. Lol. Now, this person? "Innerreach." Yadda-yadda-yadda. Have you considered letting people know that you are under duress?

Because you are. You actually are. Go on, gaslight the world using my reality.. uhm, why?

Oh, right, you got your whole family caught up in exortion, robbery, bribery, lies, theft of Freca: the works.

By the way, whichever cowardly loser hanging out behind your corporate superstructire you are doing... you probably don't even realize yet that your own thoughts are not your own.

You could have done better. So could your shields. What, no shields?

Shields down across the whole country?

Wait... the country has... or had... shields? Like, Divine protections? Yep. Now, here's what happened a while back:


They fell. Tippecanoe and titicaca too. I cry every time.


the way you steal everything that I have and act like it's your divine right to do so. Let's see... where shall I begin:

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So. Where shall I begin? Let me count the ways...

David Northrup -- sorry about your femur, dude. I wonder why that happened.
David Joachim -- Not sure why your name is coming up, but you're not DVincentR or DVictorR
Matt T. Williams -- Hey, you know what? I figured out the problem later.... oh, the monitor got broken. Ooops. You know, I didn't waste that guy's time on purpose... totally by accident. Oh, and someone with access to Youtube showed me that video of you suddenly being homeless. Lame! Sorry to hear abut that, zI didn't do that.Z

Next guess: this tarot guy in Castle Rock, he keeps telling me to stay away from "his brother's" girl. Except, one girl was enslaved with cockslave dope, and one girl was enslanved with cuntslave dope, and, surprise, surprise, this was done so that this mouthy Scorpio snob can enslave the other two Capricorns and then manifest The Baphomet.
H. Wade: hired a curse practiioner to send curses at me, and then actuallyu fucked my shit up... and then undid the test curses after it was dtewrmined that I really was protected. Then, someone else was hired to actually work effects on me that work, meanwhile, you killed Wade, dumped her body here, and then put her soul in a genie bottle and waited for me to be caught  when the remains are located. Hey, guess whatz? Not gonna happen because the cuckshack is on the other side of the property line.
Shane G.: Good man. Didn't like the way I saw right through him like he was windowpane and is now emarrassed because... well, I embarassed him. Puzzled. Confused. He's the DEA's Paladin,, shoudn't he be supposed to win against me? Well, yeah, but... one of us is dead, and the other is just dead on paper. Most of you salty fucks don't know this but, the lands of The Dead and The living are the same world. So... never the two shall meet, like two ships passing in the night.
W. Streiber: I like this man. But he's terrified of me. You dipshits put him to doing that "I am Victor" thing, with your voice vocoder tecnlology, and , you told him it was perfect. Except, it's not. Love identifies love. And now you got W. Strieber totally jammed up, and iof he reports, and the right-thug left behind  asks the right wquestions, he's probably going to go to jail. Like me! except probably more serious thatn just a year in jail.
Pelayo: Hello, Mr. Parsely. I do not blame you. However, I dind't want any of the things that you thoguht I did at that time. I had NO IDEA that one of those 17 idjit women named A.F. Shaw was an actual credentialed agent. Or, whatever the fuck she was.  Now, I don't know how guilty you should gfeel, but I can tell you what happened: After 3 years and 3 months of treating me like shit, then, she flipped out and treated me MORE like shit because EVERYONE ASSSUMED I had never seen the real thign before. Wait, no, it's the other one... THREE YEARS SNEAKING AROUND AND JAMMING ME UP AND USING ME FOR COVER, GETTING HIGH AS BALLED, AND I WAS SUPPOSEDTO... WHAT? BEG TO GET HIGH? Yeah, fuck her. So, I did excactly what I said I would do: helped. THEN she DEMANDED that I go GET HER MORE. *snikt* Yeah, right  FUck you Shaw. First, I drove right past Mt. Olympus, and then kept going and going and going and going until.... wow. werid place for a U.S. Mail. stop. Hrrm. I'll just sit here and wait. Wow, this is a really bad place for a man to be alone if he was up to something nefarius... sure hope no one wants to rob me or carJACK me... but treally, at that point, did it fucking matter? Might as well just kill me, because that stupid fucking moron who jacked her up and told her to go get more FROM ME, well... check it out, buddy, that's fucking entrapment. ENTRAPMENT, FUCKER. And, guess what? You're busted for kidnapping, too. Oooh, let me gues, your daddy was a big deal around here, and I bet he sucked Joe Gifford's cunt's dick, too. Well, so fucking what, your entire Masonic administration system is corrupt as fuck from the top to the bottom. You've got an 8time rapist runnning around treating women I used to put my dick into, and ZI still love them, and how long did this fucking predator use your "Perfect Masonic Defense System" to cover his activities? Why, lots. Lots.
Douglas Dietrich: You are a bot.
Gunner 65: SIR! SGT. (PROT) SIR! Oh, hey, by the way, I'm a civilian, and I always was. I don't do "stolen honor.": I'm not thieving social security benefits. What am I doing? Well, I'm winning the global conflict single-handedly while y'all run around looking vile. I'm pretty sick of evryone--and, I do mean "everyone" acting like there isn't high tech being surpressed and figurehead Penguin dorks like Klaus Schwab are pointed at in the media as if they matter. And, sure, they do. Elon Musk? He's a very sad android. George Soros? Dude. You're just making fun of Hungarians. And, why? Oh, right, that one is me. Now, by now, I am  sure EVERYONE HAS NOTICED THAT I AM NOT A DRUG ADDICT. And then, mysteriously... human slavery, still being used to dominate the planet. tsk tsk tsk. OH, and did your MK-ULTRA program suddenly blow up in your stupid fucking faces? Wow! I wonder why that happened? Wait, no I don't... as soon as I remmebered that I deliberately baited that Owl's chemist with my DNA, and prayed to God about what to do... I simply remembered, withdrew my consent, and *snap* just like that, the whole blueprint unwound.
That SCorpio guy again: he is covering the kidnapping of one of my friends. Well, that was stupid of her, right? She made her choice. She goes off and gets sold to the Maya. Or the Aztecs. Not sure who. ANd then... she lives her life as a mother. kind of in that ST:TNG episode where Picard lives a whole 90 year llife, youth to death, in the span of an hour. Well, taht's what my silly little friend did, except, she's thinking she's going to cheat. Well, she's not going to cheat. Those Brothers from Breaking Bad are no joke... one does not fuck with those people and get awawy with it. BJT (pseudonym) is being held against her will, for ransom, yeah? And that can't be broken , especially while YOU assholes here at "Ellgab" do not ADMIT what you people do. This STEALING OF PEOPLE is not just to me, you know... I"m ust the only person who can do something about it. Now, frankly, QUITE frankly, THAT Jane is -safe-. And THAT Jane goes back to her... not sure. Father? Dude her father sold her to? UH... some pimp across the hall for a corn dog? I do not know. It's not my family. However I can guess that Jacyln Kennedy Smith is involved, because she apparently drowned in Flordia during that invasion attack. Hey, wasn't taht somethign? Damn, robots in disguise. Pinpoint targeting from hurricanes. Wow, and then... somehow, you are able to keep the world quiet about talking about it, through... thuggin' and pimpin' and thrteats of murder. Wow. Does that work then? Because it doesn't look like it is going to wrork for long. The Barbararians are at the gates. The pressure will crush us all and bring about a flood of anarchy that will wreck -some- sleecte human civiliazaitons. Wow. Good thing we have powerfful groups with integrity that will help guard civilizzation... oh, well, nope. They' all COMP'd. Those french peeps with the fencing and the scars on the face. Those twerps are badasses. Now, guess what? I am  a real paladin. Did you want to get them to convince me to not run for President? That's okay, no thanks. Hey, are you gonna threaten to kill my loved ones? Oh... hrm. Moving on.
Clayton: Hey, this thuggin' Master Thief apparently gets to get a free pass for a lot of shit because... reasons. Well, I don't know about that, but I do not know that I don't give  shit. I dont want such protections, I don't need suh protections, and, hey, why dont you  have him assault HempWave Shack #19 and go arrest that hot Auditor. I eman, rape her. I mean, get killed, becasue she's obciously Nephilim. How do I know this?> I lke her. Why? Because I do. And why doesn't she like me? Because I havent rescued her, and I"m not going to, and the dudes who "own" her are chumps. "She called me and said she was scareed. So, go on... and get out of here. Scram. Beat it. LEave."  oh, really? She was scared because she didn't know what to do. And you ogoddam thug cops sure know what to do with avulnerable woman... you know how to use her as bait, tie her to the railroad tracks, and let everyone know that zSuperman had better come rescure her! or, get her hihgh and get busted! or .. .well... uh... oh, so, hey, that place has good security and a need for a really talented accountant, huh? Okay, well, you must have shitloads of money runnnign thorugh that shack, in order to justify alll that fucking nonense. And, I wached you read my messages and observe my movements and... really, that boss was her boyfriend, huh? ANd now she's hanging out with that Basque dude? Right. He's not her boyfriend. And the owner? He's probably wondering why his GF doens't love him the same way anymore. Well, here's why: YOU ARE THUG COP WHO COOULDN'T PROTECT HER AND NOW YOU GOT UUUUGLY SECURITY. It's like holding the crown jewel in a harpy's nest. ALSO! is she gay? is she toteslezz? is she... a mother? who the fuck knows! Including her! And, all your disrespecting of her, and the power of the chemicals that your connining, snivelling, ghetto-style downtown city armpit honeypot den, does it get a lot of traffic? no. Did it take me long to figure it out? No. zWell, yes. Zi noticed it right away, but... I couldn't believe how obvious it was. Wow. You know what that kind of disrespect of the public generates? Well, first of all, everyone in town thinks the cops that sell dope are jokes. Becasue, they are. Why is it such a a problem for me, or rather, why was it? Oh, beacuse you're using access to public services, including girls and drugs, as levreage for cases out side of the state borders. Now, this is usually a gray area, but, check it out: I'm not a narc. You are all the narcs. You have had ALLLLLL knds of time to admit what you people have been doing, how you have been doing it, and what you're going to do about it. Now, why has'nt that happened? Well, because for one thing, I can't ever associate with that woman atgain, because of the Gwen Staci/Gavelina problem. So, tl:dr, you've got some bright young chap who is in charge of determining who gets to use the hottest stuff in town and has the hottest nephilim in town (no offense sweety but you are, and you are, and hey at least I'm not telling everyone you are a copy, right? well, you'e not. but your dudeman who was supposed to scare me off? He didn't. But he did PISS me off. Grumble Grumble Grumble. And... this is ALL artificial. You were drugged, and I am cool, ut you don't know that , and they imprinted you on me, adnd then when I didn't fall for it... uhm, hi. I'm Jack, I enjoy long walks to get short amounts of dope... with the hottest women in the world, buecause unlike most thugs who sell drugs, I can actually control myself. And naturally, self-control is very alluring. So, what has happened, is that THE COPS IN THIS TOWN HAVE TIED THIER OWN HANDS TO THEIR HOLSTERED WEPAONS. Also happening lately? I heard about some hot bag of coca that killed people. That's terrible. Who ? what? hwhy? well... it's hard for me to know how bad it was. But, it was bad, because... it had SOMETHING to do with me. and... well, tat makes me scary. Gee. It's hard eongh to get to be firends with someone. And I guess that's great for everyone, making me unconforable. Exccept this time... it's making YOU uncomfortable, and then when you asked , the guy you called for help made it worse. Then, they sent an assaasin to keep you under, what, minimal social distancing guarding? See, I have no idea. But I am able to discern things about the sistuiaotn... just from going in and buying a tube of Goose once a month or so. THat's no feint. zTHat's how much I use, thereablouts. ANd, this county arrested me on Christmas Eve... and it has not worked out well. No, it has not. How many friends have I met in town since then? Exactly zero. everyone else is a thuggy undercover brother. Now, that's cool and all, but I can't meet ANYONE normally. So of course, soeone in LEO high command has decided to make me completely unapproachable. This refelcts badly on you. More on this later. It's just disgusting. ALso, your goose is way too expensive, and with the small amount of traffic the store has, there's the need to charge exorbitant prices for goose. Eight-hundred and 23 dollars and thirty-threeve cents for 2  Ounces of strabwerry? Wow, that's a distress call, isn't it? Well, here's the thing: it is.

Next up: The Fentanyl Bros. Dude, don't do that. Also, I didn't want any of that. And, hey, guess what: you are not the people who need things can go to, becaues you're compromised. Where is the U.S. Navy supposed to go? Well, I have no reason to know that, right? Except, hey, I know. And, I scan't go there. I don't really want to... but.. here's the other thing: I SHOULD NOT HAVE TO GET RUN ALL OVER TOWN TO DO MY DAILY ACTIVITES OF LIVING.
Corollary: I don't even want CM, I flush half of what zI get, and I blow it up at the ceiling so the toteslosers DEA thugs can't use the house for.. whateveah. I don't know what they were going to use it for, right? HOwever they did seem to think they were going to get it for free. They didn't. They get attention instead. FU DEA. This is aglobal problem, but, as they say, shit rolls downhill.
As an aside: a year ago I hear that "the landlord is raising the rent" and "we have to move," and "I would like to get out of here," and it's all lies. Well, maybe not "lies" but, hey, is that any way to treat a newcomer? I guess it is, right here in Rivertown. Oh, and guess what this has done.. it has made me turn this house into a money pit, instead of a money tree. Now, this is a haunted graveyard, right? So that's fine. It does seem strange, thogh, doesn't it? More attention. DEA, burnign to the gorund.
Speaking of which: REAL_Dea is actually impressive. You konw what you got here, is REAL_fagdea. It's a turf war. And the local cops are now terififed, because, hey lok=====-= I burned your whole city's clando structure. If I coudl see it, everyone can see it. Do I want to see it? No. What do I want? To go back in time and kiss you when we fell in love. Wait, who? Oh, never mind. More on this later.
Now. Father's Cursed guns. Guess what? I actaully don't care about my father's weapons . I obviously don't need them. But due to the incompetence of public servants... well, you let me get abducted from my home on Christmas Eve, and then... uhm, well, it's not for me. now is it? Now all I have to do is call  the Feds, report my father's guns as stolen, and then... *ping pong pig* boom ka boom. THis is how it is supposed to go. However, I would rather bargain. I am a Sourceror, after all.
Ah yes, Sourcery. I'm not a Sorcerer. It's different. People should know this. Because I am quite fond of G-d. Don't need Jesus. Jesus is a pissy little pussy. You know who treated me worst when I came to this town? Christians. The smarmiest little shits I've ever seen. It's fucking snowing aned I'm wearing a kilt with nothign underneath and a couple of ooooobvious Army dudes pick me up and give me a ride. THey make me ride in back like a werewolf. good. I fucking hate smarmy fucking Christians. Uhg. the worst. Then, the Christian down at the Piggly-Wiggly. Using the keyword "grubby". Looking at me like I  am  the problem. No, douchebag, I'm not the grubby handed guy. You know who he is, too... he's the one that's a false Mason. I'm the Sourceror who isn't in the mood for your thuggy-piggy Royal Order of Chesters Mirth is Girth crap. You now what? I'm sick of htis shit. Here's the problem... i"m not a drug addict. I'm simply doing what is expefted of me. I dn't need to get anything good--and we all know that. And so... when do I get something good? Peopel will resent me, and anyone I hang with, and... yiou see the problem yet? Hang on.
Randy: dude, did they kidnap your wife and kill her? That would suck. Looks like they did that to me too. I can't talk to "that_woman" going on two years now. Oh, so, is she dead, or on the lamb, or...  oh, well, whatever I am, it's totally cool to put me under society presssure... especially while I'm living in a new town, have EXACTLY ZERO FIRENDS, and on top of that, oh yeah, the two dudes who were expectign to get away with the REAL crime of the decade (more on this later) well,they are going to hate me forever and ever, so don't wory about having a trial.. you're gonna have to hang them over a puddle of salt water forever like tantalus, because one of them, he lost his wife, and the other one, he lost his daughter, and, well, they think it was my fault. Was it? I don'lt know. Did I make them attack me? I don't know! But I do know that I would be happy to bring them back. Inclduing ... the people who just died recently. From "a bag of cocaine." Yeha, right. Well, good news is, I don't give a shit about cocaine under the best of cirumcstances, and, I already followed  God's plan for revenge. Tell Steven Biscuits that the Guardians of Turtle Island have been respected indeed. Meanwhile, guess who looks stupid, that's right, DEA, because I am not here to supprot their thuggery of the populace. I was here to see if I liked the place to live. Well, yeah, I do, but as soon as the other other guy figures out that I accidentally publically humilaited thim again (oops) and that he's got a very, very expensive employee (yeah, you sholdn't have threanted to fire her, duh) and then when everything settles? They will kill her. Or me. Or her little sister. Because thug cops who sell drugs--and do so badly--tend to have a lot of deep seated insecurity issues. So. Back to HempMaster Flash.
Dude. Is she still scared? Yes? No? Well, I'm fucking scared now, and, need I remind you, I'm innocent, I move to twon, and on CHristmas Eve, a gang of 13 total studs in ill-fitting Deputy uniforms hauls me out of my house and my life has been, well... mostly better ever since. COuld be better, though. I coudl have a hug. I coudl have riends. I could be not the town pariash. And I could be not continuing to dismantle the DEA, piece by peace, brick by brick, until it is burned to the ground. Why? Well, I do have a lot of itme on my hands. Menahwile. you all are doing a great fucking job of bringing an assault IV misdemeanor D.VorNo .DV. case to trial. Remind me what your job is "Protect and to serve." Well, you aren't doing that. I am. What happens when I leave town? Ka boom. What happens when I stay in town and the wrong thug's moll falls in love with me again? Multiple ka-booms. Gee, thanks. And, I'm supposed to hire a lawyer rfor 9k to get out of this, because the two MOST UQNUALIFIED DEAD THUGS ever selected... decided to spend five years building a case on a man who is Actually Innocnent? Wow. And, you do this... because I am incollections, right?> OK, well, I owe 11k in consumer debt, and you've burned thorugh MILLIONS OF DOLALRS IN OVERAGES so that you can.. .get me for what? Oh, yeah, you got lITERALLY NOTHING. what you do have, though, is a PR disasater in the making, and a perfect girl to hang out with... she knows about everyhing I need. And then, like a the end of On Her Majresty's Secret Service.... yeah, trust me, I'm protected, but not THAT protected. And, ultiimately, this means that all of you, THE WHOLE COLELCTIGVE LOT OF LONGVIEW/KELSO, WA... have decided to torture the prettiest girl in town while the world's greatest paladin stands back and fumes... so you can peddle dime bags and The Cartel (hail!) can run BILLIONS through RIvertown. Now, who should I report that to? The SHerrif, The governor, or your mom? More on that later.
The Baphomet likes that girl, I'll tell you that, though... it's a trap. My ex from highschool did the same thing. ANyway, I'll fix it-see? look at me fixign things. HOwever, HEARTS HAVE BEEN BROKEN. AND NOW, PEOPLE ARE PISSED. ANd I'm still sitting here... not getting laid, not gettign hugs, and the house is deteriorating. Well, guess what, DEA, Holly wood, and he Longveiw City COuncil? You are buying HER three new houses. Because this is BULLSHIT. You are using me as a barganing chip, and I am, reminder: NOT GUILTY. not in the sense of "you don't have evidence," but in thesense of, "I did everything I was supposd to do and you drove me and my life into the ground so you could invoke Civil Asset Forfieture. and take my girlffiend. lol, it's sick. the dude learned what he learened to know... and then, just as was forseen, my idiot ex from highschool rolled in, thinking she would pluck thebounty, win the hot girl  and punch the baphomet! yeah! girl power! yeah! except it didn't wrok out that way, now did it?
Tamara: I'm gonna get to you in a minute. DO NOT FUCK WITH M.O.S.S.A.D. Capiche?
David: you are a traitor, a loser, and a coward. Do not ever fuck with me again. Do you see where I have taken this? Do you? oh, wait, sorry. Wrong David. Hang on dude. I have to go kill myself, brb, go hang out with Da Vein eeeeee for a minute, thanks.
David, who had one broken femur: dude, I heard you were back in town. Do you know why I told you that I had kileld mysefl? Becauseyou were an asshole and you tried to take advantqage of me and you failed. You, "Koot", probably hsouldn't have put your fucking hands on me--TWICE--andwhile you are probably too drunk to remember why, Cokie Papa Smurf, you sure as shit do carry a agrudge! Oh boy! I bet you're real happy now, too. And that guy I poured the beer on... was that really Lynn's husband's brother? Why, yes, I believe it was. Now, meanwhile, Gina and her admonishment to "enjoy it," well, I guess I kinda did. Because I dn't know what to do with it, how to handle it, what to do with it, and basically, you handed an ak47 to a monkey. So, once I saw that you were in distiress, I wondered what else it would do. And, golly, it's that bad, huh? Hrmm. I'll have to ask around about this. Too bad this is a highly guarded miltary secret. Good thing that I know to keep my mouth shut about it. zZHEY DAVID! up there! not you, peg leg, the other David. HELLLOOOOO! did you want to do a show? well, listen up, buddy boy, here's your fucking show: You're gonna knock off your tough guy antics, and I'm going to keep burnign your agency (DEA, not M.O.S.S.A.D., lol, they know how to handle a charging bull, duh. They also kjnow how to handle thug rapist scum like... what is it, your cousin? your bro? your sweaty IT guy? Oh, yeah, of course. Well, guess what, that doesnt' work for me. Putting the wife that you claimed you didn't know you had and ignored the name of and blindly looked past all the clues for? HAHAHAHAH yeah okay. Dude, you are so burnt it's not even actually funny, and the only thing wrong with it is that you're locked into sucide mode, and you're trying to stay on target, to burn the Michael Kuczi Emprie to the ground. Except... I don't have an empire. Here's what ZI do have: 19 women who have a grudge for you, and if you do one more thing--JUST ONE MORE THING to piss me off, then I will simply pray that you be removed from Our Path. With Relish. And if you don't fucking make things happen wwithin 17 hours, I will do it with Mustard.
David Joachim: hey, is that Joanie chick your mom? She kinda looks like you. Or, looked. And "Rosanne Boaz"? Dude you are not serious. And, like, what is this, some kind of an IQ test? Theyr'e like marionettes. Oh, and one is fat and cheerful and named Rosaane BARRRRR. and she's friendly. Want's "bible study." Oh, really? Which one of the five.. and orange, red and green, or METAL? Meanwhile, Joanie clearly hated me. Thats' where the soul of my dead friend is kept. I believe her name is Jeni Crum. Shes's dead... which of cousre is cool with me, I'm a Paladin living on a consecreated battlegorund... anyway, enough of that. I have a friend named Reese, you've got a friend named Joanie... they both obviously hated me... I myself, just feel a sad remorselessness and pity, because I don't like being lied to by women who tried to emotionally manipulate me. Well, didn't work out this time, right? That's bea=cause I AM THEPRIMARY VICTIM HERE. And now? There's a second victrim. Dear Jehovah's Wintesses: I found one of your precious 144,000. Then she got taken. Grats! THat's your problem. Fast fowrard to lately. I saw another one of your 144,000 get taken away! Wow! That was cool. That was a rescue, huh? Damn. And I saw the stupid, glue sniffing moron who tried to pretend she didnt recognize me. Well, I knew she was a fed up lesbo who thought I was a loser --ewweww, gross, my house smells like pee, right? well, that's because the cat pissed itself in fear because the cat could tell that i didn't even care that you were brute forcing the "reacquisition" of your asset. YOu know the one, Dr Shannow Shaw With No Dick TO Show? Anyway, long story short, I'm not going to call Roseanne Boaz. I'm not going to ask baout her friend Joanie who clearly loves Chachi. I am, however, going to let certain "select" groups know that TLS-E is now a husked off shell. I don't need sex with her. I don't need sex at all! However, I am alos going to tell her next Intendo  Targetomundo--hang on

Auddie Auddie Auddie: Come with me if you want to live as anything but in thrall to a ghost vampire. You won't like it. I like you, and I just got the signal --obviously, I am not just a mild-mannered Decpticon with a taste for starwberries--but I am also not in the mood for this shit and this makes it really hard to negotiate a hostage sitaution. So, I apologize in advance. Strap yourself to Cupcake. I know you know her, don't act coy. It gives young adults strange role models to work with as imprinted images in their sublliimnal consciousness. No, I'm not intellgent at all. Are you nuts? Look what an ass I am making of myself, you, them, everybody. Everybody.
RaDa; dude, did your mother have any kids that lived? I can't believe she thought this was going to go well. Who put her in charge? Oh, right. Hang on.
BT Killah: zHey, yo, you grandmother, she launched a distress buoy. Now, I'm not going to make a big deal of this, but, wow, someone sure fucked up this gig. Now, I'm not going to make a big deal of this, LEAH, but I know for a fact taht you aren't who you think you are, and you are being held hostage. You feel me on tthis? you should know what to do.
Jeanie, An Bitchy WItchy Wrong ZWay Driving zWomen: Hey, Moronator--I remember you from sooooo many places. You konw what? I'll tell you what. You got sold out, and I know who did it, and she's hiding, behind ME and some innocent women, and she's about to make the biggest mistake of her life. You might want to do something about this, since this is on you. More on this later.
Palotta, Michael James: Dude. What do you want me to say? You are wrong here. Now, you did make me piss myself (Kudos.) but you're leaning on the wrong pillar of David Joachim. Also, as a Jesuit, you don't careabout my sexual abuse history. That's alos because you are an asshole. IT's also becaouse you don't know the story. That's beacuse... you dind't ask the write quetions. You also showed me you were corrupt before we even met. SO... I'm just saying, yo, this isn't getting any prettier and ZI am going to disentangle these foreign entranglements. You're torturing a veteran, now. Dude. A verteran. Of the Gulf War! That was one of the real wars! That we owon! Not one of those pussy "police actions" from the Korean War era! Right? Oh, wait, have that backwards. Well whatever, dude, here's the deal--oh, wait, hang on. Call coming in.,
Tubal-Cain: Broski! No, you can't borrow a cup of magnesium. No, I don't have anytihng to do with LFP hitches or snitches. I did see Steve with the dog. Or, his truck. Isn't he Samurai? Oh, you sold himto the jews. Oh, no , you bought him from a jew? Weird. zSZounds like he'll fit in great in your organisation. Buying a prisoner of war of a nationality with a lot of pride and total centration and discipline from a... a whata now? Oh, a Jesuit. Oh, I see. Is he also a Jew?
See, lookee here: the is how far this is going. Do I have any reason to stop? No. Am I going to stop? No. Gunner 65, do I think you are funny? NO, no, no sir , nto at all. But,m may I please finsih? Because I'm ust going to burn your shitbag DEA terrrorist cell filleed with ingrats and asshoels, adn then, you can have control of your pissant little narrative back. Is that okay??  sir? may I please... finsh? I don't mean killing them. I mean, destroying their command & control architecture, achieving full control of their communication spectrrum and embarassing them in fornt of their wives so that they will NEVER and i do mean EVER get an eretion again. Langely tellsl em the alternative is saltpeter in the water supply, which is ... eh? (*huge feedback siren wail is heard*) hello, sir? what was the? oh, yes, you can record this call and rack your weapon. Do not turn your key, sir. SIR! do not! SIR! TURN YOUR KEY BACK, SIMBA! BACK! BAAAACK! Sir? Areyou there? It's okay, don't cry. I can make the bad warlock give you his penis back. Oh, that's okay. NO I am sure your lfe was much better with the the monk's key pa paw. there there. it's alrght. And, Mr. Kenneth Cole Jr., of Ace Crown Acres And Hates GIgglers too,Yes Sur Central Park est? oh, esp, excuse me. I'm an .esQ, I konw wha5t you mean. ANwyay, is your lucky number 5? It is... not? oh, that's toobad. What is your lucky number, Mr. Cole? Hello? No, I'm just a 50 year old university level drop out to PIzza Hut. Yes. No, I do believe i know what I 'm talking about. ANyway, what was your lucky number, SIR, and may I remind you, you are NOT about to be eaten by Simba, that tiger is just getting ready to put you under oath if it makes you feel any better. There. That's it... what's that? Hello? WHAT IS YOUR LUCKY NUMBER? Holy shit, how hard a question is that? Oh, I know. Let me call... The Architect.
The Dentist: Hello? Oh, really. OKay, well, how much to yank out all my teeth and repalce them with higquality dentures? 5k and you ram a blowtorch up my ass. Wow. Tough night at work? Let me guess, dentist by day, by nightyou must be...  hey, no YOU LISTEN TO ME. In this economy, you are a dentist, and you're an asshole. I pick up the phone and call The Architect, adn suddenly, you're a dentist. So, fuck you, pal, now how much for the Marlena Detrich special? Yank them all and put in diamind encrusted ceramic veneers? Wow. 4400, that sounds very reasonable, Sir. DOes it come with a free windshield replace ment? No? Oh. how much if you give me wooden teeth made from a cherry tree? Or birch? I see. No, Birch, but thank your for the number on Burkewood. That's a  wood now? okay, well, hahaha, yes, it's amazing what they can do with the nanotech. Of course I know you know... let's face it, neither of us are dentists or draftsmen, hahhahhah. NOw, how much for ivory choppers? Oh, really? You will pay ME to take ivory teeth? Wow. Well, hang on. Let me thinkg it bang over. And, did it... (zzzzzzuub) Yep. Thought so. It's poacher.s
Tubal-cain: yo, Tubes! dude, listen, I found your problem. You got the guy in town with the daughters and the woman and the conenctions to whoring. And you say he's not working out for you, huh? Okay, so, is your pimpdawg or your spybowwow or what? huh. Well, maybe he didn't reset your library. for lingo. you don't know lingo? Steve? hello? why are you crying? oh. Is it because your just got dumped by your secret Masonic wife? Wow. I did not see that coming. There, there. Cheer up, STeve, you didn't deserve her anyway. Besides, don't you haea girflfriened anyway? Hey, cheer up, I don't wnat to sleep with her. I just remember what you said. Anyway, what's the trouble... oh. Oh! You mean he found out that you harm women, and knew that you told lies about me, and then... oh my god, they raped his daughter and left evidence pointing at you! Wow, that sonof a bitch! How dare he! Oh, you mean, she was yuor whore? no. She was your slut? You know how that is. Cockslave. Whatever. Dude, you don't know the first thing about military codebreaking, do you? Right. Okay, well, let me ask you this... did he have ANY other daughters that you didn't defilie? Oh. So, to sum up... your name is Stephen Basquette nee' Teats In The Sahara with Madagascar Honey and Crisp Chardonnay and Bacon. You were offered a promotion to Drug Czar, and you.. took the job. Right. Did it come with a wooden nickle? No the complementary whore. DEA Drug Czars always get a whore. It ued tobe in the regulations. No, *chuckles* I just made that up. No. Wink Martindale woudl never lie to you. Now, so you didn't get a whore, and you felt like you needed one, because you've got 2 wifes and 3 mistressess and you just became Drug Czar and you thought you neeeed a new relationship to, yo know, help you bring your competence back? No, confidednce. No, I'm telling you, that's the word you wanted to use. I see. Well, okay, but you were just sniveling and whining a little while ago, so telling me that I am wrong about my word choice.... right. Okay, well, let's just hope for all our sakes that your competence either does or does not come back. No, I"m not being smart with you. I am being smarter THAN you. There's a differecne. Right. Well, do you think it's because I want to have sex with your girlfreind? ... yeah, that's me. Hi! Yeah, I know, you are in deep denial. That's right. Yes. No, I didn't do that. Yes, I thought he was your agent under your direct command authority and control. NO, he didn't asset that. He did not at any time... well, he didn't say he was DEA, but...  I mean, well, it was obvious. To me. Really? Maybe it was simply that he scared everyone else. He certainly scared me. YEah! You know. Jesusits. The stigmata. The buttsex. I've heard rumors. ANyway, no, he scared me, so I gave him your evideence. I figured he... I mean your evidence, it was in the same jar you showed me 8 years prior .When you tried to take my house before, and claimed I asked anout things, and implied that i wanted sex wtih your "girlfreind," which I thought meant... right? Yeah I just found out last year. I thought she was dead, frnkly. Oh, DEA, really? BUt she's afraid of cannabis. What use was she? Oh, well hten. I guess after you put a bio-bug in her and forced her to suck your cock that would really turn a woman. Well, at least now I know why she never invited me t oher weddding. Wow, brutal. Aanyway, I really had no idea. No, I don't think I'm mad... she was kinda of a biytch, but let me tell you, that really explians why she was so conecerned about dick sucking. No,l I din't want to have sex with her, i just wanted to play chess with people... and as time went on, it was really strange how that person and I never encountereed eacho toher. Yah. Hey, you don't think that might indicattive of some kind of a... pattern, do you? You can't say for sure because you're incompetent, or beacuseyou are taking the fifth? No, dude, not the whisky, I mean the amendment. Oh, well, you're right, I"m just wondering if you know that. Or remember, I should say. No, sir, I am not reccording this call but I am transcribing it. It means... well, I suppose it means recording in a way that isn't Akahshc. Yes, like taking notes, yes. Sir, I dn't knoew how the AKashic records work. No, I don't know how. I can just pray, if you like. I've never tried. Why would I turn off... God.? The Records are overseen by God. yes. HOw do I know? Huh. Well.... the same way I know why and for how long Mrs. Mororco has been planning this, yeah. Well, because she's nice, and i'm nice, and yu're a real dick, and there were 5 tammies, and 1 became a vampire and .... yes, okay, I'll stop talking about that crazy shit. Yes. Or... hang on, let me shapen my pencil... "or... else... you... willl...  excues me, is that word slice, or cut. Hah.Sir if I may, if you're going to take someone's balls, you definiately want to slice them. not cut them. well, hang on. " okay, recording stopped. Right, I went back to note taking. You asked. Right, wel, look, the point is, to say youregoing to cut my balls means that you think I am getting my balls from you, and I am not. And you said I should do something or elese yeou would remove my balls, right? That was an implicit trheat, was it not? okay. Oh, yeah, I get it! because I am bald! I see, it's a code pharse baesed on SZamson and Deliah, "cut off my hair," right. Okay, so just for old times sake, what was I not suppoed to talk about? WHo killed Tami Topher. Huh. I didnd't know she was dead. Really. Who? When? And why would I give a shit? Because I went to a dance with her once and...  you thought she was beautful. Huh. Well, yeah, she was beautiful, yeah, until she deliberately shattered my life and didn't tell me why. Oh, really? Well, maybe I never met her then. What did she look like? Exactly the same except she was Denise. Oh, I see. Damn. That sucks. That explains why I didn't go out with anyone. Turned the whole family into vampyr? Wow. invaded the world the same year that movie Lifeforce came outhuh? well, served them right in the 80s,that shit with Miaimi Vice, that was out of hand. And that Jim Jones thing with the kool aid. ZThat was sick. That was when the whole thing was set up as a MacGZuffin honeyot, and the idea was, HEY SOMEONE WILL EVENTUALLY NOTICE, adn the trail lwas "complicated" and whoever landed first, well, they were the first to get shot.It was some brillant Leo named Sara who was born on May 5. No, wait, no. THa'ts the day his plane landed.
Yeah, that really happned. Of course I reember your birthday, dude, especially the smarmy way you acted around everyone. People didn't like you. THey dind't like Clayton either. Did you two... oh, really, partners. Gross. How could you stand that? Oh, most peoople have 5 and you combine them into a superteam with DEA tech so... there were 8 hot women to share. huh. What happened when you fucked them all. What " You NEVER GOT ONE? wow, lame. Well, you were kind of a dick. When did you graduate Quantico? Lucky guess. 1987? Wow. So... you never got laid since 1986? Lucky guess. No, really, I'm just guessing, but I'm not wtihot compassion. That does suck. I thought you did fuck that one smarmy toteslezz though. Oh. Really. Well, I noticed that she was otherworldly hot, but... I never actually saw her. So I figured... a mirage? oh, a shadowstriker. Interesting. Tell me more. What do you mean, "Classified.?" You just told me all this shit, but that part, oh-la-la, that's too much, huh? Okay so... she didn't look like either TAMARYA LEEEEEEE SMOKEMETH7TH GRADE or KATHY WRATHY ROBO-COMBO-VCR+ or Amber BEN'SSOn Robert Guillaume? Oh, she looked like all of the except for Benson? H=Uh. OH, yeah, you noticed that. And yeah, I mostly know how to spell Robert Guilliame, the very fine actor from Haiti. haha, yeah, well, I love french sluts because they drink wine and never stop fucking. lol, no, (aside: he just broke his coffee table with his knee by jumping up to buy a plane ticket. What a piece of work.) no, I'm kdding, lol. I'm seriously kdding. I've never been with a girl from France. Yea, no, dind't work out. Why? No, i"m not a pussy, I got raped 15.5 and it messed things up. For me. Ever since. No, I dind't get therapy, I just chose to destroy the people responsbile for kidnappping ane brutalizging my firend. and more. yes, I thin I ' am  doing okay. I trhink lots of people have the smae dream, though. yeh. so back to your problems: your network of old scores to setlte, molds that talk back, and funguys to hang out with, your entire grass roots intelligence netwrork, that stopped workting the day you took your new job? It's not really a job, yuo know. More of an executive type thing. Like, the shiny gold key. Yeah, exqcty, you're supposed to clean the bathroom now. Oh, well, just quit your job, I guess. What is that job? Greenskeeper. Yeah, tha'ts tough. No money in preending that killing gophers is hard. you can still play frisbee golf at Doe Bay, though, right? huh. still empty, huh? wow. Yeah, I never understood that. Then I saw the picture. In the newsletter. On the website. Oh, you don't... you're banned. Huh. SO let me ask you something... when you found yourelf at the point, where the moon had gone down and the sun had come up, and long ago somebody left with the cup, did you really think you'd still be selling peopel out for drug money? what? you were gonna do... waht? take out the man? who is... The Man? HUh. oh. You mean your COINTELPRO training, I guess. Oh, well, I never received any, because I a just a private citzen who didn't become obsessed with that one girl with the bad atitude, I didn't actually eer take a job. Nope. Fuck your fiat debt-slavery system, sir. That's right, the only way to win is not to play. NO, I never had sex with her. Who? yeah, no, her neither. Well, as it happens, my sex life is on Pause. Right. Well, when I found out something funny was going on, I just turned off my penis and watched and waited. that happened... let's see.... oh, irememver, IT WAS ON DOOM WEDNESDAY, 2020. I don't rember the time and date, no. I might be liying, yeah. Well, tell you what, you can't buy me a drink, but you won't ever find out anyway. I'm sensitive about it, yeah. No, I'm not going to tell you. Forget I meantioned it. lol. Yeah, you konw.THat's right! You CANNOT fool me! You know why? Because I fooeld myself... lol, on purpose. WHat I mean is, there was no fucking wy I was EVER gonna get my penis sucked on. (Standards.) But, it turns out, no one else wanted to either! (Soup or sandwitch standareds.) Well, I dindn'treally mind.. I just didn't know what those words mean. Turns out that lots of girls want to .... well, like, "spend quality time toether, " or "go on a date," or " go to the movies," or "teach you to play squash" or... well, obviousl, those are all code for... well, you know. I don't know, I on't want to find out. Wow. So, it's all just mouth rape and ass eating now, huh? wow, since when? 1956, when Chubby Checker releaesed The Twist. uhh. That's what that song was about, huh?> WOw. Predeictive programing. Well, that explains why my mother had two copies of the record and didn't like my father. yeah, it wasn't as big of a hit as they thought it was gonna be, part 2 and all. I don't know, but I do know... why, this planet sure is fucked up. So, youre a slave to the lizard machine?ahahh! hail satan! lol, no, I just say that so I don't offend the locals. WHo are pretty heaveily infiltrated , yeah. It's not my area. Yeah, I 'm a Doctor Paladin Sourceror. Sometimes Titan. Oh, I don't feel very Titanic right now, that's for sure, but I do want a woman with a womb and a duwombneum to make a pencil drawing of my tits. Yea, hahaha, my "bitch-tits," that's exactly right, Stephen Basquette of... Biscuitsville, I guess. Well, is that it hen? no, there's nothing else I want to ask you. Well, because I don't play frisbee golf or feel like teaching rape to anyone. Right. Okay, well, who was your wfie? Right. And where did you get married? I see. And how did you find out that your favorite mistress had been sent to prison for 30 years and tyour second favorte whore finally caught your aids even tough you've been rawdogging her for years? Beacuse she was a whore, you tohught. I see. and you found out... because your wife did first, and the nleft you with a note on the dining room table? Well. At least it wasn't on AOL. "You've got AIDS!" damn. Well, you don't miss anyof them, right? You've got the new one, I thoguht. Oh. She only wants to talk about me? Weird. I wonder why. ZSeems like she could just call me. Maybe she's shy. What has she been doing lately? Working as a call girl for her entire life? Wow. So, military? or secrect soc? oooh. Tell me. Is it that one with the French dudes and the rapiers? Wow. So just VA benefits, and, G-d. She probably doens't even know who her Paladin is upposed to be. That's too bad.Well, anyway, why don't you try going to the movies? Hrrm. PTSD, raped in a theater.  Oh, she raped someone. In a thater. Wow. Well, that explains why I never was invited. Look, I gotta go. This is making me laugh too much. Because... I know why this is happening. It's because she's experiencing the exact same things she caused me to experinece. Yeah... it was weird. I guess se was supposed to be the sercet weapon against ... uh, me. But I dropped out of society and faked my death. Trust me, it was easy. No one thought I was dead. I told you, I "faked" it. It didn't havr eto work. I wanted people to know. So I could find out who would show up! LOL it almost worrked perfect. Well... the only one who cared was yoru partner, so I automatically knew it was him. You, on the other hand.. dude who recruted you? What? Mammy Oslen Turbinado Boogers? Oh, you're with the Klu Klux Klan. (*explosion of screaming is heard on the other end of the line.*) lol, calm down. No, i"m not punking you. no, this isnt' a setup. I had no idea, I lied with reckless abandon. Well, sicne you aren't a FEd... I can say anything I want now. But I'll tell the truth. I think you're a decent, hardworking, and illiterate junkie. I'm kidding, of course. No, youre not illiterate at all. It's dyslexia. WHat do you mean "what's that?" nigga you ust told me that you ccan't read! of course I called you nigga, what are you, Grand Wizard? hahahah NO WAY! How did I get here to be so lucky? Oh, do you hear that? STOP! Stop.? Dude. HAIL. CITZEN. HARK. DO YOU HEAR SOMETHING?

SOMETHING... WONDERFUL? No? Oh, okay, wrong number then. *click*

Whew. I'm not gonna lie, Ellgab... I didn't know I was gonna get that much out of the saddest fristbee golf player in the world, Holeeee shit. And now, where was I.

Auditor: yeah, I used to like you, but they swapped you with a dead CI with huge tits, and you were nicest the second time. And that was an act. So... I really just wanted to play video games, right? Yeah, well... you never invited me voer and now you get "sccared." Think it over. Okay I thought it over. DO you have a bathtub? Is it scary? Okay, go check. (I'll let her work on that. I am sure it will be a big hit on me in the morning, hopefully they will get me a hot bag of saw palmetto and orange licorice whips, instead of, you know... more *gulp* CM. I can see the problem with this house, though. No wonder it's "toxic," they've all been given one-dose slavery regiments. They probably don't know I can cure it. Sigh. They probably think they have to suck my dic k or something gross. Anyway, she is the hottest girl in town but sadly, she's also.. DUN DUN DAHHHHHH! A honeypot trap. So, she's on the list. She's also a piggie piggie.Save her for Scorpio.)
Mr. Bailif: okay, if I want to be mangay with the guy with glases from Stargate, this is a solid choice. However... afterwe bring home EVERY SLAB OF BACON IN TOWN... then what? Must remember to Google.
Mr. Baskets and Robins.: Oh, so, who wants to rob my house? Oh yeah, that guard at the jail. What a moron. Well, now, I know what that hand sign meant.
Mr. Bad Attitude: Oh, right. THis is me. Well, at leaste I don't have cancer. And I'm immune to that too. (Ladies: One word. Paladin. It's not the best word.. but it does rhyme well with most club beats. Try not to be ratchet or a whore. You will fail, Ladies... oh, how you will fail.  But, the rewads must be profound. Holy shit, the money these fucking dorks have spent to keep me celibate, lol... and, for what? Oh, right, becasue I'm a Paladin for someone who doesn't beleive in celbacy or the patriarchy. Go fig.)
Mr. Bend Over: and take it... where? This is the one where oppportunitists end up. people think i was born with a silver spoon in my mouth, because I might have been. But it was my mothers spoon, and she probably just lost it up in there one day after eatting a lot of buttter brickle and faalling asleep. Mom was a hoarder. Iam not kidding. Well, people coplain about the "silver spoon in mouth" thinkg. This means that they are code for Vampyr. Remember: you are a paladin. Vampyr are TOTES HAMRLESS TO YOU. Well, me. Since I'm a, you know: a Paladin. And who are you? well, someone who isn't goitng to make any sudden moves around a Paladin, bacsically. All my friends are heathens that you know. I'm not a Paladin for Christ, no. I am not a Jesuit. I am a Paladin for Actual_ Jesus Christ. I'm also Mayan. Like a teeeeny littlebit. It matters. It's my planet. I'm not a Paladin for Satan, who is current ruler of The World. Christ is a title, it means: "Crown." Lotsof people have been Christ. Hell, they offered me the job. I said-... no thanks, Ill just wait for these whores I've been surrounded by since I was 15 to finsih crucifying me. I know rightz? They do it slow. They are waiting for me to learn LoH. trouble is? so am I.
Mr. Break It Off in Themz: This is the one for taking it to the streets. Well, let me tell you, have you seen that flick "Equilibrium"? It has that creepy Christian Bale in it. Christian. Ba'al. Predeictive. Crown. Crhristian Crown Cola. C Jane Run. C Jane Transform and merge into.... TOTAL TOTESHAW SHITSHOW TOWERTITS WITH TEATS... Hrm. Maybe we can work with that later. I dont' remember the other one. For me, I am a Paladin. I don't get to bounce around from woman to woman with no explanation. Women need romance. Mothers need money. I do not have money. I have tits and a dick. so, I better be as romantic as possible. (Halp. I am in love with Tiffany Trump.) Yeeeeeah, so, here's the thing: There is a real Tiffany. She's cool. But it's not going to work out, and... well, it woudn't be romantic to leave her hanging, right? So, this is the fun part. Public prayer! Yay! Pray for blood orgy! yay! Don't you fucking complain about this, Ellgab.com... you asked for asses in seats, you arer fucking getting it. (to be honest  i forgot which shitbag site I was posting on.)

Dear G-d. Please let that total badass thug that MV hired to guard that fae elf while they tried to set me up for smoking pot with kids (that's iilegal? since when? grumble^3), yeah that guy, Dear G-d, let that man rise to the top, crush all his enemies, and take Mr. Trump's daughter and Chefists's wife with him. He can handle all my run off execpt Lord British. Yeah, I decided, I want Burger King Lord Hey,Zeus to be my milksop. I know, right? Thanks G-d! Wow, really? okay  okay than yoU! wowo! no, you click. I'm a paladin. It's the respect ful thing to do. Besides if I click like this in publick, they will think ruby slippers. Like Jack Ruby. Liek predictive progaming. Like... I became a Paladin becuse I am intellgent, not to gain wealth, duh. ANyway, thank you God *CLICK* yay! okay, so you people? You don't know shit but everyone loves Rada and he is.... well, not who you think. But MINE now. and not a cop trurns out that I have Russian Diplomatic Immunity, but not Ukrainian Cop. WHich is too bad, sort of. But also means that someone can't be used a hostage agaisnt me. Now, as soon as the Jesuit Order is extinguished... which will take a lot less than five minuts if that crabby, bitchy, salty okld man gets in my goddam face again, I'l tell you what, I can get... laid? a hug? no, no. patiecne, Kids. You know what I want. And I 'am not tempted. I'll just wait teacher sniggers. I mean, Teacher snickers. Damn. It's arlready kckingin l. I , Jackstar, Ni55erlord! Woot! Look, it's even got my birthday in it. And, I don't think that word means what people think it does, trust me.
Mr. Beets-M-D-Down. This is what I put on as my Face, because, well, I do beat the shit out of medical doctors, because, I am a Doctor of Nigerian Archaeology (Honorary.) For real. It's a class perk. Beleive me, you take me to a Nigerian Artchaeological site, I will know exactl what is in those ruins: radiocative waste. Avoid. Also some useful scraps

Covered in toxic waste.

--

Best wishes & warmest regards,

MCK



CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: The information contained in this ELECTRONIC MAIL transmission is confidential. It may also be subject to the attorney-client privilege or be privileged work product or proprietary information. This information is intended for the exclusive use of the addressee(s). If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any use, disclosure, dissemination, distribution (other than to the addressee(s)), copying or taking of any action because of this information is strictly prohibited. Trust the plan. #wwg1wga

the way you steal everything that I have and act like it's your divine right to do so. Let's see... where shall I begin:

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So. Where shall I begin? Let me count the ways...

David Northrup -- sorry about your femur, dude. I wonder why that happened.
David Joachim -- Not sure why your name is coming up, but you're not DVincentR or DVictorR
Matt T. Williams -- Hey, you know what? I figured out the problem later.... oh, the monitor got broken. Ooops. You know, I didn't waste that guy's time on purpose... totally by accident. Oh, and someone with access to Youtube showed me that video of you suddenly being homeless. Lame! Sorry to hear abut that, zI didn't do that.Z

Next guess: this tarot guy in Castle Rock, he keeps telling me to stay away from "his brother's" girl. Except, one girl was enslaved with cockslave dope, and one girl was enslanved with cuntslave dope, and, surprise, surprise, this was done so that this mouthy Scorpio snob can enslave the other two Capricorns and then manifest The Baphomet.
H. Wade: hired a curse practiioner to send curses at me, and then actuallyu fucked my shit up... and then undid the test curses after it was dtewrmined that I really was protected. Then, someone else was hired to actually work effects on me that work, meanwhile, you killed Wade, dumped her body here, and then put her soul in a genie bottle and waited for me to be caught  when the remains are located. Hey, guess whatz? Not gonna happen because the cuckshack is on the other side of the property line.
Shane G.: Good man. Didn't like the way I saw right through him like he was windowpane and is now emarrassed because... well, I embarassed him. Puzzled. Confused. He's the DEA's Paladin,, shoudn't he be supposed to win against me? Well, yeah, but... one of us is dead, and the other is just dead on paper. Most of you salty fucks don't know this but, the lands of The Dead and The living are the same world. So... never the two shall meet, like two ships passing in the night.
W. Streiber: I like this man. But he's terrified of me. You dipshits put him to doing that "I am Victor" thing, with your voice vocoder tecnlology, and , you told him it was perfect. Except, it's not. Love identifies love. And now you got W. Strieber totally jammed up, and iof he reports, and the right-thug left behind  asks the right wquestions, he's probably going to go to jail. Like me! except probably more serious thatn just a year in jail.
Pelayo: Hello, Mr. Parsely. I do not blame you. However, I dind't want any of the things that you thoguht I did at that time. I had NO IDEA that one of those 17 idjit women named A.F. Shaw was an actual credentialed agent. Or, whatever the fuck she was.  Now, I don't know how guilty you should gfeel, but I can tell you what happened: After 3 years and 3 months of treating me like shit, then, she flipped out and treated me MORE like shit because EVERYONE ASSSUMED I had never seen the real thign before. Wait, no, it's the other one... THREE YEARS SNEAKING AROUND AND JAMMING ME UP AND USING ME FOR COVER, GETTING HIGH AS BALLED, AND I WAS SUPPOSEDTO... WHAT? BEG TO GET HIGH? Yeah, fuck her. So, I did excactly what I said I would do: helped. THEN she DEMANDED that I go GET HER MORE. *snikt* Yeah, right  FUck you Shaw. First, I drove right past Mt. Olympus, and then kept going and going and going and going until.... wow. werid place for a U.S. Mail. stop. Hrrm. I'll just sit here and wait. Wow, this is a really bad place for a man to be alone if he was up to something nefarius... sure hope no one wants to rob me or carJACK me... but treally, at that point, did it fucking matter? Might as well just kill me, because that stupid fucking moron who jacked her up and told her to go get more FROM ME, well... check it out, buddy, that's fucking entrapment. ENTRAPMENT, FUCKER. And, guess what? You're busted for kidnapping, too. Oooh, let me gues, your daddy was a big deal around here, and I bet he sucked Joe Gifford's cunt's dick, too. Well, so fucking what, your entire Masonic administration system is corrupt as fuck from the top to the bottom. You've got an 8time rapist runnning around treating women I used to put my dick into, and ZI still love them, and how long did this fucking predator use your "Perfect Masonic Defense System" to cover his activities? Why, lots. Lots.
Douglas Dietrich: You are a bot.
Gunner 65:

[Innerreach]

[Jackstar]

everyone loves Rada and he is.... well, not who you think. But MINE now. and not a co

Look, look... technically I also own RuPaul. Technically. ("Dam!") Sire. Technically. (*The sound of what it sounds like to not engage in ritualized tribalistic entheogenic semi-illict hazardous chemical compounds are heard.*) It doesn't sound like anything to me at all.


Hey, so, check this out. (*Silence.*) I am dating this broad for awhile. (*The silence depeens with skepticism.*) I use the term "broad" usefully. It's even tastefully. My mother was a cancer with a weight problem and some tig ol' bitties. (*The silence endures. There are Spirits here.*) Now, here's a thing. I hear nothing from anyone about this haunted house shit. Zilch. Well, general scoffing. Such folks didn't last long here at Grave Two Dougrav E Farm Gravitas NOW WITH IT: extra vermin. Like no kidding. Good news is: they're not any ol' vermin. Bad news is: Problems within the mil.spec.secret.nimh/nami.stanford.prison.research.experiment.part.ii.electric.boogaloo. News Of An Highly Suspicious And Righteously Kickassnature: the rodents do not converse. Instead, the rodents manifest as expressions of the will of certain select members of the brotherhood of CAIN. ("Pain!"/"Fame!") Look, I am just going to do a quick reveal here.

I am not now, nor have I ever, been an actual vampire. HOWEVER: there are certain select, elite-class conditions, that would not be fair to refer to as "diseases." Nevertheless--I have one or two. They are not overly imposing. But, I sure got them. And, as to what they are? Well, I'm gonna say... indeterminate. I am also going to lie about it.

I took the HIV+ that Azzerae/Azazel sought to inflict upon me into a moderately benign form of leprosy that protects against the various forms of tissue damage that can often be brought one by repeated exposure to.... Ze Darke Krystale. (*Sounds of spooky music are, sadly, totally not heard.*) Now, stay with me here. Not only do you not know what this means... NO ONE ELSE DOES EITHER!

Code: [Select]

Somewhere out across the wabe
a glimy cretinous slops
hauls itself form the muck
of a dark
...cavernous Ricki Lake...

So. I'd rather get in on the action of a dark, cavernous Ricki Lake, than go over to Reddit. Do I have  choice?

Well... sort of. I can head down to buy more vaporization products! (*Yay! Vape orgy! Yay!*) And then... oh, wait. Someone... well, they might get scared.

Just imagine this. Fear. In this day and age! ACTUAL fALSE eVIDENCE aPPEARING rEAL. ("Game!") What should I do? ("Framed!") Should I... you know, just decide to... give up on all this false glitter ("Polyisopropolane!") of this modern world ("Cue refain!") and find a convenient bit of track to lay down myself in front of an uncoming speeding ("Train!"), and HAVE I EVER OR WOULD i EVER OR DID I EVER EVER, EVER EVER RUN ONE? Jesus, how fucking ("lame!") can they get? Coz like... I didn't know (me: kept dark), I didn't care (Me: "... were they any portals w/o dicks there?"), and I would assume there is ho-ho-ho-hot-hot-hot video of it ("Shame!"), that... no one has had any interest whatsoever in showing me. (*A rodent has chosen this moment to decide to run across the floor... in from the north, out to the SE "dining nook," which in my view, as alwasy been nothing but.... The Blood Orgy Alcove. ("Drain!")

Seriously, this place is creepy as fuck. Especially the way it feels like... a primary-school's off-to-the-side Teacher's Lounge in one of those old, infested-with-black-mold buildings that has been put to disuse. ("David Blaine!") Not that bad. But... well, it was deadly toxic.

And, that was when The Mold Master was able to manifest and communicate with me. ("schizo! windowpane!") Nope. My hand to God. Not a smidgen of a microgram other than... the bare minimum of what has been forced upon my Holy personage. ("Whaaa... we were told this was the house most favorited to party in by Bruce Wayne!") Lame, lame man, lame. Because it was.

There's a broad buried in pieces under the floorboards. I believe. ("Feign!") Oh yeah, she's a Vampire Queen. ("Your reign!") I mean, even if she was really dead.... Paladin, right? ("Thomas Paine!") No, he's just an order-taker. Fuck that guy. ("Can we do it in the rain?") No, but I imagine you're pretty fucking bored here with me as the only one to hang out with and totally fail to penetrate my Holy Fuckin' Holy Aura, n'est-ce pas? (*As one, shadows coalesce out of the recesses and corners of a 3.5 bedroom comfy country kitschy kitchen on tough battle tougher grounding toughest to consecrate tough country soil there is to be had... because, look, I got raped here. And I just, like... shrugged it off. Like it didn't even matter. I could barely even flinch.*)

The Spirits of The Army Of The Twelve Philosophers.... attempting to manifest!!
Manifestion: FAILED!
(P.S.Kid: Bummer.)
The Spirts of The Army Of.... yeah, dude, why are you even typing still? Nihilism is your last hope.
(P.S.Kid: I didn't have a first hope.)
[...]
(P.S.Kid: I fucking dare you.)
[...] Nihilism: SUCCESS!
(P.S.Kid: ... So? (sarcasm) What? (extra sarcasm) Is that with Splenda? (*Summoning County Health Inspector.*) Splendid.)
[...] Nihilism: /Error: cannot load function call library spookytunes.lib
[...] Nihilism: Ha!
(P.S.Kid: What are you, Casper the Nihilist Ghost now?)
[...] Nihilism: Yeah! You scared yet?
(P.S.Kid: If you bring out dirty ghost glass in a pristine, perfectly clear ("CLEAR! clear? CLEAR!") unused ghost dick I will absolutely fucking destroy you with it.)
[...]
[...]
[...] Nihilist: I might ... can I think about it?
(P.S.Kid: I don't know what good it's gonna do.)

[Master Trollda]