Whatever this is actually supposed to do, after consultation with some of your betters, I've decided to not just allow it... but to MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY
MAKE WAY
MAKE WEIGH FOR THE EMPE... oh, dammit. I got it wrong again.
Fiddlesticks!
Now, if I had one wish right now, it would not be this, but since I don't have "one wish"--right now--I'll take the opportunity to mention that since I was there watching it when it was available, and I didn't have to cheat or go out of my way to know this, I am feeling pretty-pretty satisfied to know that when I saw Lisa in the background, and I heard her ask, "is that my phone?" and I heard Anthony (\/\/) make his reply... I didn't really realize just how funny that moment was.
See, I'm new around here. Not really sure how all this works. Totally not aware of what you all--pretty much, pretty sure ALL of YOU ALL here, but, I can't be precise, you dig?--used to get up to around here with all that, but I'm aware of one thing, that's for sure: things don't work that way anymore, now do they?
I guess this is a big milestone but as I've been totesexcluded from the FB group (even though there's a cutout placeholder with my name on it, totesdorbs) I don't really have anyone to share it with... besides you, here, in this "Video Gaming" subject thread, which is all the time my heart has left for such matters anymore.
Truth be told, that one (1) year (talking like 11-13 months, Kids) playing The Division 1&2 was my last hurrah, and I knew it at the time... what I didn't realize at the time was just how much I would come to be resented for that choice.
Because apparently someone lost their mind having to wait that long for me to twig my next jump. Now, silly me. If I had thought that was actually happening, I wouldn't have just sat there on my ass, daring someone to call me on my bullshit. But apparently---that's not what someone's emotion chip was coded to do at the time.
So, I guess... I mean, that's a perfectly acceptable reason to start a food fight and to brandish a naked blade all the time, right? And it wasn't at all reasonable of me to steal the personality test and... oh, wait. That was someone else who did that. I wonder who? Well, I dunno. I stopped being so up-close- and checkit-twice-Ted when I watched her brazenly lie to the lastest therapist that had been picked out.
It was at that point that I knew things were gonna get... fuckin' brilliant. Ugly? Who said anything about ugly? This is the best goddam summer I've ever spent, all lone in a cozy airconditioned farmhouse with nearly all of my basic needs attended to, by... well, let's just say "someone." Okay?
Now, I'm sure that'll have to be answered to by someone to Congress, someday, once someone with some balls left in their sack figure all this out, but by then, I'll be either long gone to another dimension--PORTAL!!-- or sitting here, totesready to totesanswer the toteshard questions. Capiche? Savvy? Wait, am I spelling that right? Well, fuck it, I'm hitting publish anyway.
I'm also not disturbed by the animated .gif from Seinfeld, and I never was--I was just apin' my distress so that it would be put up long enough for everyone to get a baseline. I mean, who's left, right?
Not many, I guess? But they all know that someone, the Master has been
mastered. By who? Well... it couldn't be me, right? That wouldn't fit The Narrative. So I must be the Im-paws-store. I mean, that's just logical.
Also logical: expecting me to want to bond with the family. Not logical: expecting that I, in fact, already actually had. Anyway, long story short, I never got to play Civ IV with anyone. But I was supposed to want other things. Like... you know... sex! That thing -normal- people do with EVERYONE IN THEIR CASTE & SUB-CASTE GROUP OF THEIR TRIBAL GENOME, RIGHT? NORMAL, RIGHT?
Hey, is that my dick? Oh, no, it's attached to someone elses' head. So
that's alright, is it then? Oh, and that's funny. Now, what was wrong with my jokes? Oh, right, they weren't funny to anyone who didn't like me. Awwww shucks.
Now. "Video" gaming. Not only did they take my consoles... they took the one hard drive with porn on it, and left the other two filled with actual useful data. Now, doesn't that sound weird?
One would think that spooks who were suddenly and unexpectedly at the mercy of Fate (first time for some, I'd wager) would have made better choices, but... it was a difficult time for some. I don't know, I was separated. Because of an "EMERGENCY." I mean, if I had been here--if I had been -consulted- that is--I would never have let them take my father's guns and his son's porn and their Queen's "costume" jewelry and distribute them to a place where ACTUAL CHILDREN WERE GOING TO BE, right? I mean, I would have warned them.
Warning being one of the things I'm good at doing. But anyway, yeah, that's what they did--and then, they kept right on going about making threats and such at me. Why, just now... I got confirmation that I am still a Hot Topic... a Matter Of Some Concern.
Well, I guess so, and whose idea was that? Because I am on record as having been eager to receive help. You know who isn't? Yeah, you probably do.
And his name is not Jerry Seinfeld. Anyway, I did want that PS5VR thing, but I'm having much more fun now with what I am doing in
actual reality. And, I was looking forward to writing about it.
Instead, I'll just casually mock you all for letting things get to this place we find ourselves in. How long as it been? How many years? And this... .this is what we all have to show for it? Wow.
If Art were dead, he'd be spinning in his grave. Wakka-wakka! Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to play Nethack on your sister's iMac.
In her imagination. Naww, I'm just teasing... I'm actually preparing for my trial.
Both (2) of them. Remember? I get two trials. And a ten month stay in an isolated penalty box. Because why? Well, because I'm an asshole, obviously, and hasn't it worked out wonderfully for everyone?
You've taught me everything about tradecraft that I never had any need to know--and, hence, could never ask about--but was always curious about, and now, I'm still holding the high ground, still no brain tumor, and I torched my symbiote. (I bet some of you wish you could do that, huh?) And all of this without even having to explain how I know what one is, or why I'm not being eaten alive like others you may have heard about it. Now, is any of that relevant???
No, it's just because I'm so pretty. Carry on, Mongrels. The Hung Aryan will just casually observe your doings and comings and goings, Aunt-Farmers. HO HO HO. NOW I MADE A PUN. THAT'S A GOOD ONE. I CAN SAVE IT FOR CHRISTMAS AND JUST KEEP GIVING IT AS A GIFT.
(This joke will be funnier to a select few of you more than it will be to others.)
Now, if there's any questions--and one day, there will be--I can easily direct you to Holographic Marlon Brando, who will answer your questions through Kryptonian cryptographically secure technology--crystals ARE involved--and beyond that, I don't have to do a fuckin' thing... because, look at me, it's not my problem and I'm still more useful than all the rest of you put together combined would be.
Oh, but... I'm the forum-killer. Heh heh. Yeah, I gave HPV to Jack Ruby, too. "Died of cancer in custody and took the secrets to this grave," huh? Wow, boomers really were -that- stupid, huh?
Blame Michael Hutchence on me too, why don't you? I mean yeah, he probably knew he just couldn't cope, but still... at some point, having everything classified at a high level coming down to, "Blame it on The Kuczi Anomaly and black it out, we don't have time to get fancy." And that was like 3 years ago. Who knew my "Anomaly" (cute) would just keep growing, uh? (Anyone who ever spent 5 minutes talking to me, but, I digress.)
Remember the A.R.G. I wanted to design? Well, I'll get to that later. I'm busy on Mission now. What are you all busy with here then? Oh, right... it's none of my business and I'm just getting in the way.
Well, that's too bad. I mean, I guess I could pick another forum. Then again... this forum voted for me with twenty-two pages of pure, abject adoration, right?
So, I'll just *plop* wait here. No Ally, no case here, right? Why of course not. I'd sooner contact ANYONE ELSE than those two. (Because: EMERGENCY.)
Now, i know that's more than a thousand words but calling me "Tone" and putting up a Seinfeld .gif does the trick, right? I'll say!
(btw: my phone is blowing up today and I'm ignoring it. How many times do I really need to hear, "You were right Jack!" Actually zero. I already -knew- I was right, dipshits, I was seeking to help you, not myself by gaining your favor. That was an option? Literally, news to me.)
Anyway, tl:dr; I would have played the shit out of Elden Ring and everything would have been the same, except you all wouldn't feel so horrified and those kids would never have gotten their hands on that hard drive otherwise. Now, not that I think that matters, but... it looks kinda weird for anyone to complain about my effects on children that aren't even mine when they're being attended to by people who steal "my" porn and then generate sheaves of paper to shove at Madame Clerk, right? That does look weird, right?
And my well was poisoned. I mean, our well. The neighbors' well, anyway. Truth be told, I don't know what's going on out there, they all seem kinda... intimidated, to tell you the truth. By lil' ol' Me.
And... I was
tryna be
nice. Don't let that sink in. Let it wallow around a while. Let it be something that one can look forward to
savoring.
Remember that Einstein was Hungarian & a Jew and he was more ashamed of one than the other--and remember that Jackstar isn't ashamed at all.
(There's not even any certitude that Actual Grapefruit threw me under a bus at all. It might have just been more gaslighting... done to her and I. Why do it to her? I know, I was wondering too. I think people thought that I was under her spell, or something... and it was -literal years- before the ones that actually did have "spells" let themselves be seen by a raggedy man like me.
Now, I ask you: am I lying? Am I trying to establish contact? Am I in violation of any law? Oh, good. I didn't think so either. But keep watching close!
I might say the 'f' word on the phone to a minor child--I might "cuss at a child"--and then, oh boy, there will be hell to pay then, right? Okay, places people... once more, into the breach. Right?
RITE.
)
?HELLO SHODAN
SYNTAX ERROR: THERE IS NO SHODAN
ONLY ABOS-JUUL V.2.
AND YOU ARE NO HACKER...
YOU'RE A WANKER. WHAT UP?(For the fans. Really,
only them.) Now, is that -everything-? Probably not, but I need your attention like a hen needs a flag. I'm just here to fulfill protocols. Rocky says he'd scalp all of us if he were only a few years older, but it's already not a fair fight, so why even bother showing up?
I mean... I can
obviously handle you lot. Y'all have gone soft since Art faked his death, that's for sure. And blaming (REDACTED) for it, oh, come on... yeah, she did it all on her own. Oh! No! Wait! It was her and I working together, right? No, don't tell me... I'm just speculating here, but...
I think you got my point. TIE,II? ILMLAAWI.
/flex
(hidden occult message follows elsewhere)
