The Final Page of,by,for,from,& to/2\too Mr. Roper. I love you Not_Jack. You wer

[Worthauger]

I hear ya. 🥷

Well you better there's all that sweet GoFundMe donation money waiting for you to collect, you must be very proud. You've created a great thing here.

Buy yourself something nice out of petty cash, maybe something for your coming out party at Thunderdome.


(You have no power over me. Can't even mail a cigar. Pfftt. How much longer till this crap is over? I mean I've had not that many dicks come by and offer to show them in my face but you're not even that far along. I think the interest level is gone, I don't think the proceeds from the pay-per-view are going to even cover your bail.)

Taylor, why don't you find out where my necklace came from, and then write a song about it, because the headline here is that I have it, and it's assembled, and I took it apart for 4 minutes and then five guys came over and tried to rape me. Now that's power.

I've achieved Ascension. I've already forgotten what you said you done—sure you've got a new number one podcast, but do you have a flag? Do you have your own gavel? Got to have your own gavel. Pfft.

I have a symbiote. Your arguments are invalid.

[Jackstar]

I hear ya. 🥷

Dude, Lightning Crashes is about a woman giving birth who miscarries and dies when her water breaks. And and this point, what difference would that even make? You don't seem to understand what is at stake here for me.

Nothing. Nothing at all. You're embarassing yourself, whatever you're trying so hard at, not only is not working, I don't even know what it is supposed to do, and I wouldn't even be able to tell if it did, and in fact, I don't even know who you are anymore, and even if I did, I wouldn't even know what to hope for.

It's a total spirtual cleanse. I could explain, but you're retarded, and I actually have better things to do, and unlike some, I actually know when I'm not qualified to make an advance in some area. You don't even know what loss is. You do not even know that you've already destroyed what you seek to get a rise out of.

You are -clearly- hoping to reconnect to a past energy, through this interaction with me, that you are frustrated (it is obvious and known) you are not seeming to get through to now, with me. That is because... Richard, dude.


That guy is dead. Zed's dead, Dick. Gone with the wind. Like the wolf, kiss it good bye. Good night.

[Innerreach]

Dude, Lightning Crashes is about a woman giving birth who miscarries and dies when her water breaks. And and this point, what difference would that even make? You don't seem to understand what is at stake here for me.

Nothing. Nothing at all. You're embarassing yourself, whatever you're trying so hard at, not only is not working, I don't even know what it is supposed to do, and I wouldn't even be able to tell if it did, and in fact, I don't even know who you are anymore, and even if I did, I wouldn't even know what to hope for.

It's a total spirtual cleanse. I could explain, but you're retarded, and I actually have better things to do, and unlike some, I actually know when I'm not qualified to make an advance in some area. You don't even know what loss is. You do not even know that you've already destroyed what you seek to get a rise out of.

You are -clearly- hoping to reconnect to a past energy, through this interaction with me, that you are frustrated (it is obvious and known) you are not seeming to get through to now, with me. That is because... Richard, dude.


That guy is dead. Zed's dead, Dick. Gone with the wind. Like the wolf, kiss it good bye. Good night.

Nah ah! My mommy says I'm “special.” 

[Jackstar]

Nah ah! My mommy says I'm “special.” 

Dude. She was -married.- MARRIED. Like when I -met- her. What do you think that means now?

How is it that this seems "final" to you is a total mystery to me.

[Innerreach]

Dude. She was -married.- MARRIED. Like when I -met- her. What do you think that means now?

How is it that this seems "final" to you is a total mystery to me.

That you, dad? 

[Jackstar]

That you, dad? 

Something that puzzles me is what it is that you think is an extant circumstance that makes this situation one in which your behavior is appropriate, if even legal?

Like... did I pee in your Cheerios? Did I cheat at marbles? Did I key your car? Did I not give you enough time to hang out with my formerly intimate partner?

What exactly makes you think that your actions are reasonable? Or are you just that stupid? I'm curious.

[Jackstar]

Something that puzzles me is what it is that you think is an extant circumstance that makes this situation one in which your behavior is appropriate, if even legal?

I'd like you to know that I have yet to listen to your podcast, if that's what you're calling it, and the reason why is not just because I don't want to listen to it, I'd like to know what's in it but I don't want to listen to it it's because I want you to feel bad that I'm not listening to it.

I'm not quite the level where I'm willing to call you and threaten to murder your girlfriend, but that milestone is within striking distance.

There's something else I'd like to express to you. You undoubtedly feel like you are untouchable in this moment. It turns out you actually aren't.

So before you continue to do things that you're going to regret for longer than you might think, have you considered the possibility that you might be off base with me? Has it crossed your mind that you might be doing these things incorrectly?

Am I always to be the person who get out of your way when you're walking to the hallway, is that the status here and if so how is it that you determined to arrive yourself at that pecking order?

I'm asking because it's probably going to be pretty important to know the answer to these questions.

And if you don't believe me I can assure you that at some point you will become convinced.

[Innerreach]

I'd like you to know that I have yet to listen to your podcast, if that's what you're calling it, and the reason why is not just because I don't want to listen to it, I'd like to know what's in it but I don't want to listen to it it's because I want you to feel bad that I'm not listening to it.

I'm not quite the level where I'm willing to call you and threaten to murder your girlfriend, but that milestone is within striking distance.

There's something else I'd like to express to you. You undoubtedly feel like you are untouchable in this moment. It turns out you actually aren't.

So before you continue to do things that you're going to regret for longer than you might think, have you considered the possibility that you might be off base with me? Has it crossed your mind that you might be doing these things incorrectly?

Am I always to be the person who get out of your way when you're walking to the hallway, is that the status here and if so how is it that you determined to arrive yourself at that pecking order?

I'm asking because it's probably going to be pretty important to know the answer to these questions.

And if you don't believe me I can assure you that at some point you will become convinced.

Stop wasting my time with your delusional and highly unspecific assertations, accusations, and assumptions.

🖕Get some psychological help, bitchboy!🖕

[Jackstar]

Stop wasting my time with your delusional and highly unspecific assertations, accusations, and assumptions.

She's (blanked) to the (blank) that (blanked) me up for the (blank), and so both of them are up to their (blanks) in TOTESMASSIVE TOTESLIABLITY, you mouthy oats'n'barley knickle-bog cuntface, and if you don't fucking shape up, I'll say something I won't regret, you won't forget, will spread like wildfire through late August bundled-up faggots, and will be so innocuous that not even your blessed mother will be able to bust me for, so help me God.

🖕Get some psychological help, bitchboy!🖕

Too late, boot-dragger, I just solved the case 5 minutes ago and then took it all the way to the touchdown line in fuckin' Tampa. Pack it up, yard-arms, you're all fuckin' done. I -told- you. Did I fuckin' stutter like she did on his shrimpcock? Do you think for a fucking minute I give a shit? You could have been nicer and you fucking will be from now on, go ahead, fucking shoot me, shit'n'dick for brains.


#I_WIN. Fletcher, Beau, ''yer extraordinaire.

[Innerreach]

                                                         [Crackstar]

[Jackstar]

                                                         [Crackstar]

Dear Texas Doucher-Two-Fer;

Entrapment is a serious crime, and one with serious consequences. Now, fortunately, you and your totes'dorbs partner aren't going to have to keep on using each other as human shields while wearing your matched set of footy pajamas with duckies and bunnies sewn into them (See my Instagram, bitch, let's see you pull that one off in Court, because I -will- make all my Court appearances in that outfit from now on, you can got-damn fuckin' GUARANTEE THAT, holy fuckin' shit, you are so lucky I am the worlds's greatest diplomat or The Family actually would take your -actual- balls. Do you fucking KNOW who I AM? Jesus? No! He doesn't have the cognitive capacity or the long shootin' iron required to deal with an Alpha Draconan, Tom, what are you, nuts?


I AM JACKSTAR. D.O.M.B. *thunder* LIGHTNING DOME IS, IN FACT, THE NEXT STEP UP ON THE PENANCE LADDER FOR YOU, PUNYLING. SAY, HOW LONG AS IT BEEN SINCE YOU HAD YOURSELF SET UP FOR A DWI CHARGE? WOULD YOU LIKE ANOTHER DWI CHARGE? OH, WHAT'S THAT PUNYLING? I CAN'T HEAR YOU. YOU SAY YOU'VE NEVER BEEN SET UP FOR A DWI CHARGE BEFORE?

YEAH, WELL, THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK, MOTHERFUCKER. *blinks_away* Dude. Now you've done it. I better drink all these beers he left behind before somebody else gets... you know, chastised, not stirrred/hurt. And one more thing:

STOP TEASING GRAPEFRUIT, ASSHOLE. SHE DOESN'T NEED THAT, AND NEITHER DO I, AND IF YOU THINK YOU KNOW WHAT A MAN PISSED OFF LOOKS LIKE, JUST YOU WAIT UNTIL YOU FIND OUT WHAT A MAN WITH A LOAF OF BREAD PISSED ON SMELLS LIKE. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOUR LITTLE STUNT HAS COST THIS TOWN? YEAH, WELL, NEITHER DO I, BUT GUESS WHAT, I AM NOT PAYING FOR THAT, EITHER.

NOW, DO WHAT IT TAKES TO PUT MY QUASI-WIFE AND MY CUTE-WIFE ON THE PHONE WITH ME ON THE SAME TIME, TONIGHT, IN TWO HOURS--AND IT HAS TO BE TONIGHT, YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA HOW IRRRRRITATED I ACTUALLY AM, YOU ROTTEN SLOPPY-SECONDS SUCKIN'DOWN SCOTCH CIGAR-CHOMPIN' BASTARD, OR, LAND SAKES! I SWEAR GOSHEN! I AM GONNA LET BAILOR RIP YOUR BALLS OFF AND PUT THEM INTO FUCKING ORBIT WITH ONE GOLF CLUB AND FIFTEEN POUNDS OF CRYSTALLINE SUPERFLYTNT, MOTHERFUCKER, YEAH, FUCK IT, FIFTEEN POUNDS OF THE GOOD STUFF, RIGHT TO THE GODDAMN MOON, YOU WANT IT SO FUCKING BAD, I CAN HAVE BAILOR LAUNCH YOU AND ALICE INTO A LONG ELLIPSE WITH A SHORT TOUCHDOWN TIMER TO GET THERE IF YOU'RE SO FUCKING JONESING SO FUCKING BAD.

HEY, YOU WANNA SLAM IT SO FUCKING MUCH? HOW ABOUT YOU TRY NOT LYING TO CLERGY, SHIT-FOR-HEELS AND MOOOSE-DROOL-FOR-BRAINS. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? DO I FUCKING STUTTER? WHAT, YOU NEVER SEEN AN ARYAN HUNG LIKE THIS BEFORE? I'LL FUCKING CHOKE THE GODDAM LIFE OUT OF YOU AND SHOW YOU HOW A RESURRECTION THE HARD WAY FEELS, SWEET BABY JESUS WILL STILL BE CRYIN' FOR DAYS AFTER WATCHING YOU TRY TO PICK YOUR TEETH OUT OF YOUR ASS AFTER I MURDER YOU WITH THAT CORN ON THE COB YOU GAVE UP TRYING TO EAT WITHOUT YOUR FUCKING FALSE TEETH IN IT.

YOU ARE ALREADY ON THE HOOK FOR GOING TOO FUCKING FAR, SO COME ON OVER AND MAKE IT A TRIFECTA, DUMBASS, I ALREADY KNOW YOU'RE RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET, YOU WANT ME TO WALK OVER AFTER DARK AND OPEN YOUR GATE FOR YOU MYSELF? BECAUSE I CAN FUCKING MAKE THAT FUCKING HAPPEN, AND WITH MY GATE OPEN ALREADY--AND THE INNOVATIONS THAT THE K.U.C.Z.I.O.O. CAN BRING TO YOU, RIGHT ACROSS THAT PUNY LITTLE "HIGHWAY"--SON, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK WILL HAPPEN EITHER.

BUT I DO KNOW I DO NOT NEED A NEEDLE TO FUCK AROUND ALL FUCKIN' NIGHT TO FIND THE FUCK OUT. NOW, PRETTY PLEASE, WITH SUGAR ON IT: GET TO WORK ON YOUR LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT AND I CAN HAVE THAT FUCKER THROUGH AN APOSTILLE PROCESS BEFORE DAWN. BEHOLD: THE POWER OF QLERGY.

I WILL NEED SOME MORE CHEESE THOUGH. I GOT SOME WHITE--A LITTLE BIT. BUT MY YELLOW IS MOLDY, AND MY GREEN AND RED IS RED AND BLUE RIGHT NOW. FUCK! LIKE WHAT THE FUCK?!! ARE YOU TELLING ME, ALL THIS TIME, YOU THOUGHT THIS WAS ALL A JOKE?

IT IS NOT A FUCKING JOKE, MY LITTLE FRIEND. LET ME CALL UP DECON, HE AND I COULD DO A QUICK 5 MINUTES ON THE SUBJECT, ANY TIME, ANY WHERE, WE DON'T NEED A FUCKING FANCY FUCKING STUDIO, YOU JUST MADE THAT SHIT UP SO YOU COULD HAVE AN EXCUSE TO BANG ALL THE VIRGINS YOU THINK YOU NEED TO KIDNAP. I MEAN, "RE-EDUCATE." JESUS H. CHRIST.

TEXAS: NOT EVEN ONCE, KIDS. WHAT  A BUNCH OF ASSHOLES FUCKING ASSHOLES. SHAKING MY DAMN HEAD. JAHBULOSE.. NO...


LASSAGENA 21. (He's not half-spic, dummy, he's half-wop. THAT MEANS EYE TALL ALIEN. unbelievable, Tex, you got me fucking cursing in English. Look, just don't piss me off anymore for one night, you think can manage that? I'm so fucking angry i can barely keep my horns from poking out of my wrists. No, your whore can't suck on them. GET OUT. *click*

[Innerreach]

Dude, you're homo.

🤠👉👌🌹

[Jackstar]

Dude, you're homo.

Dude, no, and if I do, I know -exactly who is gonna rape me into it--and it'd be a fuckin' struggle, I'll fucking tell you what, believe me, you ain't got the arms' reach nor the cognitive capacity to know what singing key to put my Sacred Feminine back to sleep when you're done, you would draw back at least 2 or 3 inches shy, no doubt--and that hasn't happened yet, and maybe it will, but, you know what? Fuck you, I just asked Rubini to marry Mini-Rubini. FACT.

Now I'm going to post the email in the Rubini thread (WATCH ME, COMMANDER DAVID VICTORIA RUBINOWSKIWOWWOWSKI, THIS IS HAPPENING, THIS HAPPENED, AND IT WILL CONTINUE TO HAPPEN, LIKE A NON-STOP EASTBOUND AND DOWN FUCKING FRIENDLY FUCKING FREIGHT TRAIN, YOU CHOKIN'N'CHEWBACCA CHEWIN' MOTHERFUCKER, YOU LIED, YOU LIE, YOU BASTID), and you are gonna kiss my fuckin' grits, Tex, because I HAVE HAD ENOUGH. I AM NOT CALLING FOR SHENANIGANS, YOUR APE-SLUNG-JAW-BROKE-DICK SHIT-BAG, OH NO, NO NO, NO NO NO.


I AM CALLING FOR A DOUBLE WEDDING. TOTES. SIGNED, BLAM-BLAM-BLAM. (Do not underestimate the things that I will do, have done, and will fucking keep fucking doing, Boy. You done been warned, WYRM.) *slam*

[Colonel Pate Manly]

-CPM

[Jackstar]

-CPM

Do you really think that shoving people around and name-calling is an effective disciplinary technique? I don't think your force projection is very compelling anymore. I could give a shit what you think and you and the other cunting thug fuckhead might as well go neck yourselves. The world doesn't need your blunt interpretation of Papi Knows Best. AND I DID NOT NEED TO WASTE THE LAST YEAR OF MY LIFE SO YOU COULD KEEP YOUR SHITHEAD POSITION AT THE TOP OF THE MULTI-DIMENSIONAL FOOD CHAIN, ASSHOLE, AND IF YOU WANT TO GET ACTUAL_SUED INTO REAL_BANKRUPTCY, fucking keep it the fuck up you Puny little pimpmongering obsolete bully coward thug. (By the way, I want my phone back, fucking go get it and deliver it, Mr. "It's Evidence We Say," I hope you get cancer in your dick from unicorn withdrawal, and if I have anything to say about it, you're gonna lose your fucking badge and driver's licence; fucking walk everywhere from now on, Asshole

p.s.: your domination of the slave trade is over, go get a real job, Loser

p.p.s.: speaking of real jobs, come haul my bags of trash to the dump, Bitchlips, do something useful for a change

p.p.p.s.: I fucking told you I needed help, well now you know why. Consider yourself busted down a rank or two, Tough'n'Smart guy