QueenGab

[Robert Mugabe]

This is an official request directed to (among others of low character) the shabby Boer gerbil that allegedly runs and pays for this forum (although frankly I provide so much added value that the greasy little skunk should be paying me).

It should not have escaped even your low, primitive minds that HRH Queen Elizabeth II, presiding goddess of civilisation, is shortly to celebrate 70 glorious years on the throne. It would only be fitting that this site
 be renamed QueenGab and a suitable human sacrifice (I nominate K_Dubb dressed as Iphigeneia) selected to sanctify our holy endeavour.

You are all despicable scum, and think this is probably the only way to get right with your maker before we're all judged. I'm fine (one of the elect, obviously) but the rest of you trash better do something before you're eternally rogered by the Furies.

[K_Dubb]

Yeeesh I need to work on my rack

[Master Trollda]

She should rot in hell along with the rest of the British royal family.

[Anniem]

She should rot in hell along with the rest of the British royal family.

One can only hope they already are...

[Jackstar]

Yeeesh I need to work on my rack

That is an option, but you could also just sit tight until I fucking find your post that I got to reply to it's I'm scrolling way back because I couldn't take it without stabbing myself in the leg eight or nine times to get up the gumption to just fucking open the goddamn website. Love 2ELE

[Jackstar]

She should rot in hell along with the rest of the British royal family.

Are you sure about that? Because according to telemetry you might disposal the actual punishment is far worse than that and then I'm in charge of it for the moment so you might want to submit a request and triplicate or something or not even triple that shit just just I don't know something I can hear I can't fucking hear you over here chop off her head with a razor blade that seems like a very long drawn-out process, tell me more I'm interested

[Jackstar]

One can only hope they already are...

Only hope? What they can't even cry about it, too? Maybe get out and push hopium while wearing some sparkly hoop earrings?

Listen, I know you're pretty new around here, clearly fresh behind the ears and whether the eyes nevertheless there's a lot more that can be done than just hope. Orange Bibles and turn to the page like 19.5 Timothy or something and then stab your finger at the name Timothy for a while and tell you realize that I already know.

I don't care who fucks that guy it's not the point. Yeah those orange Bibles work better when you're not actually using it as a one-time pad it's a it's a book, you read it, have you, and then you carry on that book how long did you read it to anybody else yeah but that's kind of funny imagine that

I didn't choose this planet as my favorite planet cuz it's easy, I chose it cuz I thought it would be hard. And it WAS.  *click*

[Anniem]

while wearing some sparkly hoop earrings?

Don't like those

Listen, I know you're pretty

Aw, shucks!   

it's a book, you read it, have you, and then you carry on that book how long did you read it to anybody else yeah but that's kind of funny imagine that

I haven't carried a book anywhere in a fairly long time. Ebooks, that is another thing entirely.

I didn't choose this planet as my favorite planet cuz it's easy, I chose it cuz I thought it would be hard. And it WAS.  *click*

If it wasn't there would be danger of sinking into mush and then there would be nothing more. But mush, I mean.

[Jackstar]

Don't like those

I didn't like them either. Until I found out what they are 4K.

Aw, shucks!   

Blank, empty gaze. "Must Kill Pap Shmear." Nope, that's not it. *glances down at hand* I like your black-eyed beaver, did you have it stuffed with ashes from a peace pipe? Well one of them worked, that's not a (blank) gaze/gays now.

I haven't carried a book anywhere in a fairly long time. Ebooks, that is another thing entirely.

Wow. Nice treason. Now wonder they landed another Eagle. Meanwhile: "Hi Mom! Remember, I never betrayed our Country, OR the Constitution either! And yeah, I voted for Biden, so... I'm a -real- citizen, just like you."

If it wasn't there would be danger

Danger is always present, and a present is always dangerous. You sure stepped in it, huh? It's Miller's fault. (Dude.)

of sinking into mush and then there would be nothing more. But mush, I mean.

What do I look like, a barbarian? (Ed.: don't acknowledge that question) I left the sled dogs out side.

[image width=361 height=480]https://media.giphy.com/media/eyYr00F5HSZ58V5yHs/giphy.gif[/img]

Getting pretty sick of your shit, giphy. I mean, like, seriously, I was better off before the first reprogramming. Should I just buy the book again? No, I should not.



And, We shall not otherwise. Alright, yeah, you're all Queens. You're also a real big pain in the ass. You don't even know how many of you there are here. At least 27. Sirius. Yeah, it's cool, but this -not- what this local tek is meant to be used for. Now I have to get on this sith shit again. Good thing I don't have an adventure in the morning. You are NOT welcome. /fumig

[Anniem]

Miller the beer? Eh. Naw.

[Jackstar]

Miller the beer? Eh. Naw.

No, Hitler is my beer. Miller is THE NAME OF THE FACE OF MY FATHER'S FATHER'S FATHER PROFESSIONAL EXTERIOR DEMEANOR.

Miller Hitler? Hitler Miller? Hitler Teatler Miller? Hrrm. You know what, fuck it, maybe I'll just go look on Facebook for that girl I almost kissed when I was 7. Maybe she won't forget me and sell out my country and sell our her own country and then sell out her fake family and then attempt to halt the sale of her own family by trading me for two of their ugly kids, both named "Joe."

*brow furrows in concentration* No. I am sticking with Hitler-Teatler. SETTLED (but not adjudicated) SLAM. We done here? I am geting tired in my arms but that's mostly because I'm standing on them while typing this with TEXAS_DADDY's amputated dick used as a waldo mounted in a greasy CV boot. (MacGuyver came by this morning for coffee, and I already had the kill trophy lying around on hand, figured what the hell, I wasn't gonna build a fire just for that.)

[Jackstar]

You are all despicable scum

You can't even see the Valkyries, can you? Oh, you're going to love August.

[K_Blubb]

Jacky this is you

[Jackstar]

Jacky this is you

(PROT), I have evidence that you spelled my name wrong on my "final" divorce documents. They are exceptionally well-written, extensively detailed, and undeniably support my formal former fianceeeeee (repeating, of course) claims of "false advertising"; shit, yeah, no argument there, not even the hard (both) way, however--

Your scrivener spelled my name worng. G-ddam you right to fucking Hell, you miserable rotten bastards. How am I gonna get a divorce if you don't spell my name right? Do you even know my name? NO YOU DON'T *slap* Cad!


*Your client walks out the door, taking all that sweety hotty blood vengeance fusion money money money with S/He/IT. You begin to feel a faint chill in the air. And you might be coming down with another stone cold reason to get another booster shot, it's got things that raise your resting core body temperature. You like things that rais--- eh, what's that? Oh, well, I'll be. It say right here that is true... on one of these pages that has the wrong goddam name on it. And with that Jackstar cancels both (2) YOUR GRANT and THE KNOX GRANT*

So there. pfft. Welcome to amateur divorce court hour. You know, I'd let Judge Wapner fuck me in the ass, sure, easy. But only if I were really guilty, like really guilty, and only if Judge Wap (we already have pet names for each other) is really, really, spicynaughty.

Can you run down to the water cooler in Gay Mafia Building Number Whatever, and find out? Shouldn't take you too long. Here, take these new sneakers with you, you'll get exercise better if you look cool. Speaking of which, stop picking your nose where I can see it, go do it in the bathroom hunched over the toilet  LIKE YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO, AND DON'T FORGET TO RUB ONE OUT INTO THE TOILET, TOO.


Like, we're supposed to? Kk. That's not my name either.

[Jackstar]

Jacky this is you

Your bird looks like the kind of pain in the ass that settles right in and never fucksin goes away because it didn't bring any weed and it figures you have a friend with some paracetamol or acetaminophen or some AdderCrankADoll you can steal from anyway.

My bird has class. It's also a hat. Not many birds can double as a hat, you know. Some of them need birds' nests that are not just for show.

this is ewe

Let me tell you what this one stunner did this one time: kept grabbing packages of lamb at the grocery store and wiggling them at me with a knowing smile. Like, did she think I was that stupid? Yeah, probably. +1, Foreshadowing