JEFF RENSE IS A FÆRIE!!!

[Jackstar]

Trifling: you wouldn't do it to Happy Fun Ball, now would you? Pfft.

[Jackstar]

For context, note that someone cleared my cache files while I was working on an all-knew offering of my award-winning debrief: Five Minutes With Jackstar.

Someone figured out that telling me in public to “stfu nigger” was...  I'm gonna say here, “counter-productive.” Because I do not take orders from thugs operating under false color of law. I ain't even in their jurisdiction, man•G.

So... rather than start over, I just started yodeling into the streets. Because I have no reason to talk ... UNTIL I GODDAM DO.

Am I too much? Awwwww, shucks. Tomorrow looks full of mE²!


tl:dr; The stampeding will continue for an unknown length of time. BECAUSE EFF YOUR WHORE THAT YOU CALL A (blank), THAT'S WHY. Now go wax my trucks, Alfred-san. Or whatever it is you do that you think is “work.” I am war king.


And I'm really beginning to develop a taste for Crown Royal Sperg. Maybe I'm going to need to launch a beverage line along with The

MAGICK
IN
BROADCASTING

CONTENT DELIVERY FUCK(SIC)SHAWSHOW™. (Re-branding not official. May be satirical in whole or in part. You thought I was kidding. HO HO HO —

NOW I HAVE A MA’ SHEEN.) Too bad I can't use colored text.



Because I'm colored, right? *massive dynamic rolleyes*

This is only the first week.
Long live The New Administration. Looks like it's gonna be a real gasser. Now, how about a Fresca?


(It'll probably pair well with your... CO/KO-Lå!) Adieu.

[Jackstar]

For context, note that someone cleared my cache files while I was working

Someone call the FBI Cyber Crimes Division and tell them I'm a manifesto-frenetic and I can hack computers with my mind. (Just kidding, they already know.) What?

Do īT. *pokes you with a stick* Come on man. I thought you loved calling 911! I thought you wanted to marry 911 and have little 911 babies! THEY'RE ON YOUR SPEED DIAL BY NOW, RIGHT? BECAUSE I'M SUCH A MENACE.

* Jackstar lets out a heavy, melodramatic sigh.

I could have whistled, but I already have applicants to be my dog. Do I need a cat? 🤔 Jewel has reincarnated already, you know. Do you think she liked being abducted and murdered? SHE'S A CAT. She had zero idea what she was agreeing to.

Fortunately, I am a diplomat. Note that this skill works on many animals. Women, too. Especially now that the cockslavdope is no longer freely available.

That's because of me, incidentally. Not because it's an abomination... but because I was left out of the loop. Big mistake.

I'm Clergy. I got rights. That's THE LAW. I guess none of you really thought any of this through. Well, neither did I.

I am a Source Titan Paladin. When I get a panic attack, you get a plan of attack. “BOTH (2) HANDS!” Okay, Veruca.

Salt? 💥


 

Code: [Select]

I don't like my work-in-progress deleted by mil.spec.MPs. You don't own me, NATO. Settle down. I am two phone calls away from watching WAR ATROCITY TRIBUNALS being formed. Sooooo...

I'm gonna get blasted and masturbate into my own mouth. (Kidding.) Because I was WORKING.
Then my 4A rights were violated by someone. I guess I'm supposed to “get the message”? HAHAHAHA NOW THAT'S A GOOD ONE.


WITH.GOD,.ANYTHING.IS.POZZ.A.BULL..WHAT?

COVert IDentification. Now... who scheduled the train, OK? (Klaxons sound.) Oops! I can't ask that. I retract the query

You have legal bills. I am a fucking legend. We are not the same, Bellgab.

So there. *click*



p.s.:.Metron, I only found out a few months ago, why you have had to hide. Impressive. They must have been really serious about, you know... keeping all this IN_CONTROL. What a barrel of laughs.

p.p.s.:.NOTHING CAN STOP WHAT IS COMING. (URMO.)

p.p.p.s.:.This has been practical joke #2. (I was held up in traffick.) Now μou ewe!

p.p.p.p.s.:. Hurry up and zugzwang? That slogan won't catch on. Also: your colleagues are afraid of you. Your children fear your lovers. Your lovers fear being identified. And your entourage... FOUR FÆRIE FAGGOTS FROM t‘FUTUAR!!! Which is convenient. One for each wind you can scatter them to. You know how to scatter clan doughs to the four winds, don't you?


p^5.s.:.Who blew Kennedy? Probably not just me. And probably not again. Married to Punch Bowl Wizard? Sure, have a goddam trial.


Keep it classy. Keep it sassy. Keep it free of pugilists. They're hackneyed. Mazel tov!

[Jackstar]

someone cleared my cache files

Someone stole my electronic ink typewriter, three (3) laptops, and nine (9) of my cell phones. Now, let me guess...  everyone thinks I deserve to be robbed blind under false color of law by mewling thugs and sycophantic lackeys, have I got that right?

Step right up and ACCEPT CULPABILITY!!!!!! (Just a suggestion! Don't charge me with Witness Tampering, bruh!!)


The moral of this story is STOP HACKING MY GODDAM PHONES. I got a call earlier from “Probable spam,” and I answered by asking if this was “MI:5, MI:6, OR SOS?” I meant to say M.O.S.SAD., but I'm losing patience with this bullshit.

The caller hung up immediately. Fancy that. I'm schizophrenic, huh?


If my work-in-progress EVER gets fucked with again, the same thing happens. There are laws in this goddam country and you arrogant spookshow chuckleheads are going to start following them. ,←∅•



You had your chance to bring a case on me to trial. ANY THING. THREE (3) YEARS AND BUPKIS, FEDFAGHAGZ! And destroying my work seems a viable play? Check your privileges, whyteboiZ.

Meanwhile I'm gonna go suck Reggie Hammond’s dick. Y'all be cool. Right on. (Word.) What?



Married Christmas, bourgeois proletariat underclass. R∆vVWR!

[Lazarus]

How many ex-wives does he have? Is it 7 or 9? I've lost count.

Are you now, or have you ever been, inside a Rainbow Girl? Asking for a friend.

[AZZERAE]

I'm schizophrenic, huh?

No-- That's me, Mirror Man.

[AZZERAE]

I'm gonna go suck Reggie Hammond’s dick.

GAY.

*Inner Reach voice*

[AZZERAE]

Someone call the FBI Cyber Crimes Division and tell them I'm a manifesto-frenetic and I can hack computers with my mind.

Have you been speaking to your Thoth deck again?!

[AZZERAE]

*pokes you with a stick* Come on man. I thought you loved calling 911! I thought you wanted to marry 911 and have little 911 babies! THEY'RE ON YOUR SPEED DIAL BY NOW, RIGHT? BECAUSE I'M SUCH A MENACE.

There's an individual called "Stellar 911" going around. He emailed me about some shit I don't give a fuck about. You should look into him.

[AZZERAE]

I'm really beginning to develop a taste for Crown Royal Sperg. Maybe I'm going to need to launch a beverage line along with The

MAGICK
IN
BROADCASTING

CONTENT DELIVERY FUCK(SIC)SHAWSHOW™. (Re-branding not official. May be satirical in whole or in part[...])

[AZZERAE]

This is only the first week.
Long live The New Administration. Looks like it's gonna be a real gasser. Now, how about a Fresca?