Damn I just got it in. I think it's funny how the sensors do not ever always know the right thing to do, but sometimes... they just don't risk it. I can say some pretty brutal shit.
And you want me to get sober? And a job? I'm pretty sure I'm not going to do that. I might get a hobby.
I might get a hobby whore. (🤞) And I might do this without ever bothering you. Go to El gab again, but I'd like to point out that I've been banned from the lgap site for quite some time, not because I I can't be trusted to associate with every single famous lesbian and totalize in the world, but because somebody else is there pretending to be me and it's awkward for all the people who are trying to traffic all the world's most famous lesbians in total lesbian whores into sex slavery if there's a real person there acting like real Jack star and then they realize that they've been played for a really long time and then lgab is no longer doing anything cool. Oh and by the way, I know that Charlie kike is Biff thunder muffin, I know that you move from body to body. I know that they did kill that body and that biff thundermuffin is still alive and so they didn't really kill Charlie kike. They just killed the character and they had to do that because people are starting to figure out that l gab in gab. It just turned into Michael exploitation, and people fucking know whether you go to the goddamn court or not.
So that means I'm not your hostage, I'm your friend, cuz I'm not too pissed off but I believe that if I continue to be alive and pissed off and all of you keep on stealing from me and acting like you're fucking in charge, I think your little game off your war is going to spill out over the edge. I won't really mind since I'm pretty neutral.
But I like to point out that you can be making a lot more money and getting a lot more sex and probably doing a lot more grooming of children that you steal from the black market in Abu. If you could stop wasting your time on Michael Clifford kusi, which you never should have been messed up with in the first place, because obviously I'm way out of your league.
So I don't know what you're going to do about all this but it's pretty cool that I know all of this just from the letters. PB
SO I GUESS I'M PRETTY IMPORTANT AROUND HERE, WHY DON'T YOU JUST FUCKING PAY ME AND GIVE ME A JOB, OR ARE YOU JUST BUSY GIVE JOBS TO HUMAN TRAFFICKING MOZOS WHO PRETEND TO BE ME? I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU DO BUT YOU'RE SURE SHIT DON'T GIVE ME MONEY FOR IT.
SO MAYBE BARKING ORDERS AT ME AND CALLING ME A NIGGER AND TELLING ME THAT I NEED TO DO THINGS AND YOU'RE NOT GOING TO GIVE ME MY COMPUTERS BACK THAT MIGHT BE A LITTLE BIT TOO FAR OVER THE EDGE, WHAT DO YOU THINK? COPYRIGHT MAGIC CASTLE LLC.
OH AND BY THE WAY I'M GOING TO PUBLISH THIS. RIGHT NOW.
EFF YOUR EEFFOC.
LONG LIVE THE ART BELL GENERATION⟩⟨.
You’re also a threat to our democracy.
You don't have a democracy. You have a parliament of totally gay fagot owls, and I happen to know all the stuff that I need to know about how poor Biff īhundermuffin got Charlie kite killed and has been stealing everything I do the whole time and that's why they killed Charlie kike because a critical mass of the citizenry figured out that everything on a .gab was a lie, meant to make it possible for human traffickers to collect and attract and exploit the most valuable and most beautiful actors and actresses on the planet, all of whom know Art Bell, have probably been bailed out at least once by Cassandra Peterson, which is an exquisite experience, I can assure you and that Biff īhundermuffin was not necessarily the most kindest of people. (They cloned Biff īhundermuffin, and then when they shot Biff īhundermuffin — Or rather when Charlie kike was killed, the other guy left over was still energetically connected to the life essence of Biff īhundermuffin. So that's how the performance actor was alive and then dead and then alive again. Again and again. AND AGAIN! But meanwhile no hugs for Michael cousy and I need a job and I'm supposed to be sober, while you're stealing my cars in my house and my money and using my name to launder your shit and you have guys pretending to be me who may not be me and then you've got Charlie kike taking my content and rebroadcasting it and making money off of me. Not going to lie: I'm surprised they didn't hit him with a freight train after running him over with a herd of whorses and then shooting him up with everything commonly found under the kitchen sink in every American kitchen, not just a stake or a drivable steak of wyrmwood - but I can see how people might have... just decided to just take him out an easy way. (I knew all this because this man has been hounding me for years, and I realized that he was an idiot but I didn't know he. I was that big of an idiot and clearly he didn't want me to find out what he was doing, or give up what he was doing and what he was doing. He was pretty illegal so I'm pretty sure he was dead set on not giving up his claim to the Michael cousy name, and so they blew him the fuck away. Nice shooting, Tex. Huzzah! How many more of Snow White's dwarves are left, because now that I know that we're running them down one by one. I want to find one and beat the life out of them with a bag of oranges. And I know there's one living at the RV park that's literally about a mile away from my home, I mean my residence, I mean the Honda church, I mean there's a guy who is impersonating me and think that he gets to do that and that it's none of my business that he's stealing from me and doesn't want me to find out and acts like he's in charge and thinks that he's going to get away with it and the cops know this. But the cops don't really know what to do or how to care about it. And I think it's pretty fucking funny because he's stuck with some woman that he thought would be fun to rape but she's probably not fun to rape or they've moved around out of the way. and I just saw the guy last month and I didn't give a rat's ass about taking vengeance or killing him in Cold blood, because I have people for that, and I don't really care to be a vigilante, and I wouldn't want anybody to miss out on the jurisprudence or the jury trial for this one, because how many people knew that all of this was really happening? Probably not nearly as many as all the people who wanted why the fuck I've been going on and on and on and still being allowed to do it in public, because obviously our days are just some kind of crazy needle junkie? No actually I'm a primary victim and I'm goddamn intelligent so maybe you'll fucking leave a team of posse dudes to go do this faster cuz I'm pretty fucking tired of having this stupid conversation over and over and over while screaming at the nightmare rectangle. ADDITIONALLY: HOW YOU'VE GOT JAMES BRUCE CAMPBELL III RUNNING DEA AND ESOTERIC GHOST HUNTING FOR WHATEVER YOUR ORGANIZATION IS WHEN HE'S SO CLEARLY BAD AT IT AND OBVIOUSLY REPLACED BY SOME SORT OF NEEDLE JUNKIE DRIVEN BUG SLAVE, AND I CAN'T GET A JOB AND I'M SUPPOSEDLY TOO RISKY TO DRIVE AND I CAN'T EITHER SELL OR TAKE DRUGS AND I HAVE TO BE SOBER, HOW I'M SUPPOSED TO BE SO BAD WHILE HE'S SO GOOD IS A FUCKING MYSTERY FOR THE AGES, BUT I'M GUESSING THAT HE'S GOT A RELATIVE WHO'S REALLY ALBINO-ISH AND IS TOTALLY ON BOARD WITH THE WHOLE ONE DROP RULE, OH BY THE WAY IF I'M A SALT :Ë: ZIGGER THEN YOU MUST ALL BE REALLY IN NEED OF BAKE KING SODA.) How many people named Charlie got shot is probably a matter of classical and classified information. However, I did see ⅗ of Ben10 today, He was a kid riding a bike, and he was another kid and... Well, it's kind of hard to explain and I'm not supposed to talk about grapefruit's children on the internet, but let's just say Ben is pretty awesome and I can see why she wanted to make sure that I loved him and she didn't really have to make sure she could have. Just told me that she's got a teleporting transformer kid who can split off into 10 parts and blow up sons, but she probably thought that would be spoiling the onion. The other one's even cooler but half as old and twice as bitter and his big fat Austrian father fucker who doesn't want me to talk about him or to him either. So I got to wait till he's 18 before we send O'Neil a singing telegram, I don't think O'Neill is over here under that name but over on Belgium and I didn't really know who he was and he didn't seem to like very much and that's not surprising since he was in Austria and planning on ripping me off for everything that I had because my father was a Hungarian who did something wrong, and that man's kid and that man's either ex-wife or mother of my time traveling friend, whose name will remain nameless, that's one of the Grapefruits, and, OH SHIT, IS THAT A SECRET, I DIDN'T DOX ANYONE DID I? OH MY GOD I'M SUCH A BAD NEEDLE JUNKIE BOOHOO HOO BOO BOO BOO SOMEBODY CALL THE WHAMBULANCE.) And then I don't know if they know these names, but I certainly recognize them and then I know quite a bit more than that.
You’re also a threat to our democracy.
You don't have a democracy. You have a platter of fine cheeses and selected savory snacks formed into a charcuterie for gozer the chartu Korean. You feeling on this?
DESTROYER OF DREAMS. JACKSTAR. ME. NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR DEMOCRACY. THAT'S WHY THEY DECIDED TO SHOOT YOUR FIGUREHEAD LEADER WHO WAS STEALING MY CONTENT AND PRETENDING TO GET AWAY WITH IT AND THINKING THEY WERE NEVER GOING TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. ALSO THAT PERSON IS HENRY, WHO RAN GAME ON ME AFTER I CAME BACK FROM EUROPE WITH KIRSTEN, RATHER THAN JUST SIMPLY TELL ME THAT WE WEREN'T GOING TO GET MARRIED AND THAT SHE HAD BEEN LYING TO ME, I GUESS THE WAY THAT THE UNDERCOVER DEA ASSHOLES WHO REALIZED THAT I WASN'T GOING TO BE AS SUFFICIENTLY EFFECTIVE DRUG PUSHER OR DRUG CRIMINAL, NEEDED TO RUN GAME ON ME TO MEASURE INTO SOME OTHER SITUATION AND I'M SURE THAT SEEMS LIKE A PERFECTLY REASONABLE THING TO DO BUT I DIDN'T REALLY PARTICULARLY FIND IT TO BE ALL THAT MUCH FUN CONSIDERING I ALREADY KNEW THAT THING WAS FUCKED UP AND I DIDN'T REALLY CARE TO BE LIED TO ANYMORE ESPECIALLY SINCE I WAS PAYING FOR THINGS MY MONEY AND I DIDN'T HAVE THAT MUCH, ALTHOUGH I GUESS I DIDN'T EVEN DESERVE TO HAVE WHAT LITTLE I DID.
AT LEAST THAT'S THE JEWISH PERSPECTIVE.
AND ALSO: THAT PERSON IS TED. TED IS A CHARACTER WHO HANGS OUT ON TELEGRAM AND ACTS LIKE HE'S IN LONDON AND ACTS LIKE HE'S A PERSON WHO'S VERY DISMISSIVE AND JUDGMENTAL ABOUT PEOPLE USE DRUGS AND THEN HE TRICKS PEOPLE INTO TELLING HIM THEIR STORIES AND THEN TED GIVES THE STORY TO SOMEBODY ELSE AND THEN THEY MAKE A TED TALK OFF OF IT AND MAKE LOTS OF MONEY CUZ MOST PEOPLE WHO ARE HIGH ON DRUGS DON'T KNOW HOW TO GET A TED TALK, BUT BIFF THUNDER MUFFIN AND HIS ILK OVER ON EL GAB CERTAINLY KNOW HOW TO GAME THE SYSTEM PRETTY GODDAMN WELL SINCE THEY'RE HARVESTING FAMOUS PEOPLE BY USING A CONDITIONER FORUM SOFTWARE AND AUTORESPONDERS TO MAKE MAN INTO WOMEN WOMAN TO MAN AND HUMAN TRAFFICKING ALL THESE PEOPLE WHO ARE REALLY FAMOUS. YOU KNOW, I FELL IN LOVE WITH HERMIONE THE OTHER DAY — HERMIONE_ACTUAL — THAT WAS PRETTY NICE, YES I KNOW THAT'S NOT HER REAL NAME, YES I KNOW HER REAL NAME, YES WOW HOLY SHIT IS SHE EVEN MORE OF A A SPARK BASTARD PERSON, AND YEAH I STILL HAVE TO BREAK UP WITH GRAPEFRUIT SO I DIDN'T THINK IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO ACTUALLY CONTINUE WITH THAT SO I SPIKED THE ENTIRE SCENARIO AND SHE RAN OFF AND HAVEN'T SEEN HER SINCE, WHICH IS ANOTHER WAY OF SAYING, “EXIT STAGE LEFT”. WORK? WORK? JOB?
DEAR LEAH MESFORD: YOUR NAME'S NOT LEAH, I HAVE PLENTY OF JOBS, YOU THINK YOU HAVE ONE, AND YOU THINK YOU FLOSS SOMETHING, BUT YOU'RE ACTUALLY JEALOUS OF YOURSELF, BECAUSE YOU'RE A TIME TRAVELING SCHIZOID DOPE PEDDLING FREAKAZOID FROM VENUS I THINK, AND LIFE IS A LOT MORE COMPLEX THAN YOU THINK, SO MAYBE YOU COULD WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF INSTEAD OF WORRYING ABOUT WHETHER I HAVE A JOB OR WHETHER I USE DRUGS, OR WHETHER I CLEAN MY HOUSE, AND THEN JUST SIMPLY STOP STEALING FROM ME, THAT WOULD BE HELPFUL AND, BY THE WAY I WOULD LIKE A HOUSE THAT ISN'T SABOTAGED AND ISN'T A TRAP HOUSE AND HAS AS MANY CLONES OF HERMIONE AS YOU CAN GET TO PACK IN THERE. SHE'S ADORABLE. LIKE YOU WERE, BEFORE YOU STARTED ACTING LIKE YOU WERE BAIT FOR A DRUG PEDDLING POREMONGERING GANG AND EXPECTING ME TO HAVE A JOB AND TO GET SOBER AND TO ACTUALLY DO WHAT THE HELL YOU'RE SAYING IS IF YOU'RE IN CHARGE, LIKE YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH ME EXCEPT... OH YEAH WELL YOU'RE IN CHARGE AND YOU DO HAVE ACCESS TO DRUGS AND TYPICALLY MEN JUST FALL FOR YOU AND DO EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT AND IF THEY DON'T THEY DIE AND YOU KNOW WHAT I'M NOT TYPICAL.
(Vengeance for Daniel Radcliffe.) Hey dude, sorry to blow your cover, but my middle name is Clifford so if you get yourself a heath Cliff we could probably make ourselves a Natalie Wood triangle and I'll push the two of you off a cliff for the cute one. Not that you're not cute, you're actually both quite cute. But she had an attitude that was appropriate and you have an attitude that is, also appropriate, except ... You're not really good at telling the truth are you? That's because you're an actor. But she was really good of telling the truth because she's a woman and she lives a fabric of lies and when it came time to tell the truth she did it quickly. Also: it's amazing how we never hang out, except when you want to, I guess that makes sense since you control your own schedule at grim gots, AS IN CODE FOR ITEMS OBTAINED FROM SCENES OF CRIMES, BECAUSE THE ENTIRE HENRY PIRATES JAGGER IS A THINLY VEILED REFERENCE TO THE DRUG WAR WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT I SAID TO TWO PEOPLE THAT I NEVER TALKED TO ANYMORE AND SO I'M NOT SURPRISED TO FIND MYSELF AT A DEA TRAP DOWN WHILE LIVING IN A HAUNTED CHURCH DEA TRAP FILL AND RUNNING INTO YOU AND HER AND EVERYONE MAKES A LOT OF SENSE BECAUSE I'M SURE PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW WHAT I WAS GOING TO BE INTERESTED IN.
AND I'LL LET YOU KNOW LATER, BECAUSE IT'LL BE THE SAME AS IT IS NOW: NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS. THE EXCORIATION OF BIFF THUNDERMUFFIN WILL CONTINUE... AFTER THESE MESSAGES.
hey Grapefruit, what are you going to do about your Sourcerer Z•—ger husband?”
And as soon as the the big fat pills boy doughboy looking mother fucker asshole who's pretending to be her husband using my name and brainwashing her into believing that, as soon as he gives her permission to call me I'm sure she will right away, but he's probably not real happy with me and if he even is there or remembers what happened, I guess it's kind of awkward since they're in a Time bubble and I have no idea where grapefruit is and that's why you don't call 911, Baby. I literally told you that this outcome could not only possibly occur, but would be inevitably start to occur if you kept on talking to your sixth spread rape gang friends on your iPhone, and then you laughed at me and told me that you wouldn't suck my dick and then went back to talking to your sex parade rape gang friends in Texas. Not that they're bad, but they are pretty stupid, as well as from Texas, where they do things bigger down there, so they're real, big, stupid and they're real big denial. And yeah they really fucked with the wrong person and probably shouldn't have made the assumptions they did about me that they did such as that that would be easy to deal with, they should be taking things from me, that I don't deserve to have a girlfriend, that I need to get a job, that they were going to chase me away, and that I need to be told happy birthday by Matt over and over and over, like dude I get that. You're a really stupid racist Texas sex spread rape gang salty X oil and gas technician junkie criminal fuck, but you could at least have some style, and I do forgive you for what you did. But I will point out that what you did was wrong and you probably should have done that and you couldn't really help yourself since you were being misled by Satan as well as the power of MK ultra Mike control chemicals. So really, I guess you're up shit creek aren't you? Well that's cool. At least you're fucking my wife. I mean my other wife, I mean I have a lot of wives. I guess I mean I get you're all got yourself at the situation where it's not working world tenable, that's because trafficking human children into sex arrangements without telling them why or what are for tends to make lifelong disturbances for a person when they started out at 15 and 1/2, and I don't give a fuck if you think I need a job. I got a fucking job right here: Beau Radach and I are going to make the Weird Science reboot: NAKED. WHOLE MOVIE. FUCK ASS NAKED.
Or maybe we'll just sit around and smoke drugs, I really don't owe yet, but I told Beau Radach that I was going to make him famous and it's not for being a criminal, it's for being awesome. Nice necklace bro. Don't worry, I know it's a terrible thing for me to expose yourself to the world like this, but for one thing, I'm the the great granddaddy fixer of blackcraftmasonry, and I like your mom, and I would never disrespect your mother especially since got way more options as well as she didn't ask me to fuck her. She asked me to help her with her boys. Beau Radach: you're helped. (That wasn't a secret.) Benji: and killing those people, I'm sure you'll understand that I won't say who exactly or how it is that I know what you are doing and that why that was perfectly okay, and I don't know if you knew this or not but people know that I'm me and when somebody else starts using my account, the people at Facebook notice that and then they call the police, because that's what Facebook is for and whatever kind of magic or mystery or who thought you were going to get into by getting me jammed up into killing people, I would like to point out that that didn't work, because people know that I don't kill people.
I don't even kill them when I fuck them. Maybe they kill themselves later when they find out that I'm not going to fuck them anymore, but I really don't get to find out about this, because some asshole gang of fuggy Piggy human traffickers has been sitting on my phone. You're accepting all my calls for the last several years and I'm guessing that this traces back to Biff thundermuffin who probably should have been thought to have been a less likely Target to be a problem to deal with rather than me because they probably should have a lot sooner, but I guess he was the one telling people to shoot me because he was blah blah blah blah blah. Stop me if I'm going too fast here, but I'm trying to impress Hermione so I can put her on my knee and bounce her around a little bit without it being all weird and awkward. I think I'm probably single. I know I'm not getting fucked kissed or hugged, and somebody whose life I've saved too many times is asking me for cigarette money and then crying about how her father's been bitten by a radioactive spider and she's wondering what he's going to eat. Let me tell you it's amazing what they can do with hypnotic drugs these days... Especially when they're administered with permission under authority to people who trafficked me into being... Well whatever I was 50 and a half in their cops and these people punish each other in very particular ways. Hopefully they'll still be able to do it without my computers and my phones and my cars and my sex life under their belts, because the purpose of my life is not to give winking thugs things to plausibly say that they're protecting while they're actually exploiting them, the purpose of my life is to find every single bully that has ever lived and then make them all fuck each other to death in a a negative zone whirling mirror triangle thing like Joel used, I figured that'd be a lot easier if I could just put everybody whoever thought that they'd bully anybody, and me, put them all in there with Ursula Andrus and taryn's stamp and let the fat guy jump into down on them. That sounds like a good way to deal with police. I mean bullies. I didn't mean police at all, police is just a job. There's nothing wrong with police, but dynasty families of bullies that reincarnate over and over and over and carve out their territory and they exploit the people by being immortal beings that hop from body to body, sometimes that's an Algonquin tribal family unit, just trying to make it through the day, but also it's sometimes Texas oil rape-pread sex gangs that pick the wrong sourcerer's girlfriend make have a bad day. Are you savvy? I FUCKING BET YOU ARE, BELLGAB. LET ME KNOW WHEN YOU'RE SORRY ENOUGH TO BUY ME DINNER. BECAUSE MAYBE THEN I'LL JUST TELL YOU TO FEED WHATEVER YOU GIVE TO YOUR WIVES WHATEVER IT IS THAT YOU EXPECT YOUR MOTHER'S TO EAT. OR SOMETHING. I DON'T KNOW I, I'M STILL WORKING OUT HOW DISGUSTED I AM BEFORE I FIGURE OUT HOW KARMIC YOUR PUNISHMENT SHOULD BE, SO PROBABLY I WOULD TURN THIS OVER TO TO HERMIONE BUT SHE'S NOT MY ACTUAL GIRLFRIEND OR EVEN HERE OR EVEN ACTUAL, BECAUSE THAT WAS JUST A FANTASY. WHY WOULD I MEET ANYBODY FAMOUS? I DON'T SMELL NEARLY GOOD ENOUGH, I'M FAT AND I DO DRUGS, AND I CAN SING PRETTY GOOD, BUT ELVIS'S HACKNEYED, SOOOO... YEAH MAYBE I SHOULD GET A JOB DRIVING TRUCKS SO THAT BIFF THUNDER MUFFINS CRONIES CAN COME INTO MY RESIDENCE AND PLANT ACTUAL BOMBS AS WELL AS EVIDENCE, SINCE THAT'S WHY THEY WANTED ME TO GET A JOB, IT'S NOT BECAUSE THEY WANTED ME TO HAVE A CAREER, IT'S BECAUSE THEY WANTED ME OUT OF THE HOUSE ON A REGULAR SCHEDULE SO THEY COULD BRING IN MORE STUFF TO KILL ME AND PLANT IT IN AT THE TRAP HOUSE, DID YOU EVER MENTION TO ANYBODY THAT BIFFED THUNDERMUFFIN IS A TOTAL ASSHOLE AND A MAN AND PRETENDS TO BE A WOMAN AND ALL THE WOMEN ON LGAB WHO ARE TOTAL LESBOS AND CROCK-POT COATS SLEDS WHORES ALL BELIEVE THAT BIFF THUNDERMUFFIN IS A WOMAN BECAUSE THAT'S.. OKAY I'M NOT GOING TO TELL HER NAME BUT HERE'S A HINGE SHE TRAFFICKING ME AS WELL AND THAT'S HOW I KNOW ALL THESE PEOPLE SO WELL BECAUSE THEIR LITTLE SCHEME HAS GONE ON AND ON AND ON AND ALL THAT NEEDED TO GO INFINITE ON WAS FOR ME TO GIVE UP AND RELENT AND FIND A NEW LOVER AFTER THEY SHOWED UP AT MY HOUSE ON CHRISTMAS EVE WITH A BAKER'S DOZEN OF POORLY DRESSED THUGS IN SHERIFF'S COUNTY UNIFORMS AND THEY HOLD ME AWAY FROM GRAPEFRUIT AT GUNPOINT AND I HAVEN'T SEEN HER SINCE.
HINT: LOOKING FOR HER IS A PRETTY GOOD JOB, BUT I'VE GOT A NUMBER OF IRONS IN THE FIRE. A NUMBER OF SIDE HUSTLES THAT MAY TURN INTO BE LUCRATIVE ONES, MORE OR LESS, OH AND BY THE WAY I WAS TOLD THAT SHE WAS DEAD AND I WOULD NEVER SEE HER AGAIN AND NOW SHE'S ALIVE AND SHE GIGGLES ONCE IN AWHILE BUT MAYBE THAT'S JUST A REMOTE CONTROL? I DON'T REALLY KNOW NONE OF THE PEOPLE WHO KNOW HER OR HER HERSELF CAN TALK TO ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE THERE ARE STILL PEOPLE TRYING TO GET RID OF HER BECAUSE THEY'RE PRETTY MAD AT HER FOR SURVIVING AND PRETTY MAD AT ME FOR NOT LETTING HER DIE JUST BATSHIT CRAZY INSANE IN GENERAL BECAUSE LOOK AT THEIR ENTIRE THUGGY PIGGY EMPIRE BURNING DOWN TO SYNDRA'S RIGHT TO THE GROUND, JUST LIKE I SAID I WAS GOING TO FUCKING DO.
JACKSTAR: MAYBE I AM FOR TRIFLING WITH, IF TRIFLING WITH INCLUDES FUCKING. I LIKE TO HAVE SEX, I LIKE TO MAKE LOVE AND I LIKE TO FUCK AND I DON'T REALLY THINK MUCH OF PEOPLE WHO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THESE THREE ACTIVITIES BECAUSE THOSE ARE THE KINDS OF DISTINGUISHMENTS THAT PEOPLE MAKE WHEN THEY DON'T WANT TO DO ANY OF IT AT ALL, THEY JUST WANT TO GET PAID, SO I DON'T REALLY WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH SOMEBODY WHO PRETENDS TO LIKE SEX, HOW ABOUT SOMEBODY WHO ACTUALLY LIKES ME AND WANTS TO HAVE THEIR BRAINS FUCKED OUT WHILE HIGH AS BALLS? HERE'S A HINT ONLY ABOUT 1/3 OF THE 342 WOMEN THAT MAKE UP GREAT FLEET RIGHT NOW WOULD COME OUT FOR THAT, AND REALLY ONLY ONE OF THEM NEEDS TO IT BECAUSE THE REST CAN WATCH IT ON FREE PERVIEW. SO MAYBE EXPECTING ME TO GET A JOB AND STICK WITH ONE WOMAN THAT DOESN'T LIKE ME AT ALL ANYWAY AND IS A LESBIAN IS PROBABLY NOT THE BEST IDEA FOR ME, ESPECIALLY WHEN ALL OF THE OTHER GRAPEFRUITS ARE BEING SUPPOSEDLY TRAFFICKED OFF BY BIFF THUNDERMUFFIN OFF TO OTHER PEOPLE WHO BELIEVE THEMSELVES TO BE GETTING A HOT BUY BUT ARE ACTUALLY JUST GETTING A WOMAN WHO'S BEEN HYPNOTIZED TO BELIEVE THAT SHE'S TALKING TO ME, MICHAEL CLIFFORD KUCZI.
HEY I'LL GET OUT, I DON'T WANT YOU TO GET THE WRONG IDEA, BUT I'D LIKE TO POINT OUT THAT YOU'VE HAD ME IN YOUR STUPID LITTLE KUCK SHACK FOR WAY TOO LONG, AND NO ONE'S REALLY BOTHERED TO NOTICE THAT THAT'S NOT REALLY APPROPRIATE, ESPECIALLY SINCE I'M FASCINATING INTERESTING AND A LOT OF PEOPLE OVER THERE WONDER WHAT I'M DOING AND WHY I DON'T POST OVER THERE AND THE REASON WHY I DON'T IS BECAUSE I'VE BEEN BANNED AND REPLACED BY A BUNCH OF THUNDER MUFFINS STUPID FUCKING LACKY THUGS, SO THAT'S PROBABLY WHY CHARLIE KIKE GOT SHOT IN THE HEAD BECAUSE THAT PERSON IS RUN BY A BIFF THUNDERMUFFIN AND THE WHOLE LGAB TEAM. EVERY GETS THE PICTURE?
I AM NOT_Q. AND SHE WON'T GIVE YOU ANY METH EITHER.
I PROBABLY WON'T DO A TED TALK FOR COMPANY. I PROBABLY WON'T DO IT FOR MONEY. I'LL PROBABLY WRITE A SCRIPT AND THEN LET HERMIONE_ACTUAL READ IT. IF I'M LUCKY, AND SHE'S NICE ENOUGH TO THINK THAT IT'S FUNNY, SHE COULD PUT ON A SET OF TIGHTS AND A LITTLE PAIR OF BUNNY EARS AND SHE CAN JUMP AROUND DOING CALISTHENICS WHILE READING THE SCRIPT THAT I'LL WRITE FOR HER AS WELL AS HAVING A SYNTHETICALLY PRODUCED VOICE OF ALFRED HITCHCOCK READING THE SAME SCRIPT IN THE BACKGROUND BACK MASK BY ALFRED E HITLER READING THE SAME SCRIPT TRANSLATION THEN BACK INTO SWAHILI, OH DID YOU KNOW YOU'RE SPEAKING SWAHILI NOW I'M JUST KIDDING YOU'RE NOT SPEAKING, YOU'RE THINKING IN IT. NOW DOESN'T ALL THIS SOUND LIKE A FASCINATING GROUND FOR A PERSON TO COME UP WITH A TED TALK ON? YEAH I'M SURE THAT'S WHAT BIFF THUNDERMUFFIN THOUGHT TOO. ALSO THAT PERSON DID A RUNNING GAG WITH KIRSTEN ANNE ELIZABETH HALL ALSO THAT'S PERSONS DANA A LITTLE BIT ALSO SHE STOLE AN ENCHANTED BLACK SAPPHIRE AND ALSO SHE FLIPPED A BUNCH OF HOUSES AND ALSO COMMITTED MAJOR FELONY FRAUD AND ALSO I KNOW ABOUT ALL THIS... PARTIALLY. AND I HADN'T HAD ANY CONTACT WITH HER FOR YEARS.
AND THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN, A WOMAN PULLS A KNIFE ON ME, ASKS ABOUT ANOTHER WOMAN'S ANUS AND MY DICK, AND DOESN'T SEEM TO BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY THAT I HAVEN'T BEEN ANYWHERE NEAR HER FOR 12 YEARS, AND THEN SHE FLIPS OUT TURNS INTO A GORGON AND I HAVEN'T SEEN HER SINCE. THAT WAS ALMOST 4 YEARS AGO, AND OBVIOUSLY THERE'S SOME LOOSE ENDS TO PACK UP AND I THINK THAT PROBABLY YOU COULD DO BETTER WITH THOSE LOOSE WINS THAN TRYING TO TIE A NOOSE AROUND MY NECK, BECAUSE I'M ACTUALLY MORE INTERESTING THAN MOST THE PEOPLE LEFT BEHIND, BECAUSE EVERYBODY ELSE IS EITHER RUN OR BEEN KILLED IN TRAFFIC, AND I GUESS THAT'S THE END OF YOUR LITTLE STUPID FUCKING FUGGY PIGGY GANG OVER ON ELLEGAB.
OH I'M SORRY, DID I DESTROY YOUR CONCENTRATION? THAT'S TOO BAD. AND I FIND IT INTERESTING THAT CHARLIE KIKE WAS THE PERSON WHO WAS TAKING MY CONTENT AND REBROADCASTING IT AS IF IT WAS HIS BUT IT WASN'T HIS AT ALL AND OBVIOUSLY IT WAS A LOT OF PEOPLE'S COMMENT BECAUSE YOU FELLOWS HERE ON EL GAVIN AS GAVIN BELGAB ARE PRETTY INDUSTRIOUS NOW THAT YOU'VE GOTTEN RID OF EVERYBODY INTERESTING AND YOU THINK THAT YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE A FREE ACCESS TO THE WORLD'S MIND SHARE SO YOU CAN MAKE MONEY OFF OF IT BUT I GUESS YOU'RE NOT GOING TO FUCKING DO IT THE SAME WAY NOW CUZ I GUESS SOMEBODY GOT SHOT, AND NOW I GUESS I CAN TALK ABOUT WHAT I KNOW, AND AS I DO SO I DISCOVERED THAT I KNOW QUITE A BIT, DON'T I?
GOOD. I KNOW EVEN MORE THAN THAT. BUCKLE UP, BUTTERCUP.
SO I'M NOT SURPRISED THAT CHARLIE KITE GOT SHOT, NOW WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO TELL EVERYBODY ANYWHERE FURTHER CUZ I CERTAINLY CAN AND I'M NOT LYING AND YOU CAN ALWAYS GO AFTER ME THE CIVIL COURTS IF YOU WANT TO LOOK INCREDIBLY STUPID YOU STUPID BUNCH OF GANG APES SPOON GROOMING LESBO WHORES.
I DON'T MEAN TO SOUND LIKE I HATE GAY PEOPLE, BECAUSE I DON'T, AND I DON'T HATE ANYBODY. I DON'T EVEN HATE THESE PEOPLE WHO GOT CAUGHT DOING WHAT THEY WERE DOING AND HAVE JUST BEEN OUTED PUBLICLY, AND WILL PROBABLY END UP HAVING TO DO A LOT OF HARD TIME BECAUSE THEY JUST GOT OUTAGE AND PROBABLY DIDN'T EXPECT THAT THEY'D BE EXPOSED THIS WILDLY QUICKLY, BUT I JUST KIND OF FELT LIKE IT, AND I'M NOT HAVING SEX OR DOING LOTS OF DRUGS RIGHT NOW WITH PEOPLE WHO TRUST ME SO I'LL DO THAT LATER BUT REALLY I LIKE TO WRAP THIS UP BECAUSE I'M PRETTY TIRED OF A BUNCH OF DUDES ON THE INTERNET THINKING THAT THEY CAN PUSH ME AROUND WITHOUT HAVING ANY CONSEQUENCE CUZ THEY DON'T THINK THERE'S ANYTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT.
PUNYLING NUMBNUT GAYFAG BASTARDS: I GUARANTEE YOU, THAT I CAN ALWAYS THINK OF SOMETHING TO DO ABOUT ANYTHING.
I AM A SOURCERER. I AM ON A MISSION FROM GOD.
AND I'M NOT GOING TO ASK ABOUT WHO WAS WAS PERSONALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR DESTROYING MY ENCHANTED FROG POND, BUT HERE'S A HINT AND EASE THE WATER BACK ON, AND NOW I NEED A WHOLE BUNCH OF VOLUNTEERS WHO ARE WILLING TO PUT ON BIKINIS AND SLAVE AWAY AT A HAUNTED CHURCH IN A MILITARY SUPERVISED HOLLOWED AND CONSECRATED GRAVEYARD TO PUT BACK TOGETHER ALL THE STUFF THAT GOT BROKEN WHEN NEIGHBOR SHANE AND I DON'T KNOW WHO ELSE DECIDED THAT I DIDN'T HAVE ANY WATER AND THEY COMMITTED A WAR CRIME.
A WAR CRIME.
SO RATHER THAN GET HUNG, OR EVEN WORSE GET REPORTED, DO YOU THINK YOU ALL COULD STOP LIKE ACTING LIKE YOU'RE IN CHARGE OF ME CUZ YOU'RE NOT AND STOP TELLING YOU TO GET A JOB AND YOU'RE NOT AND START PAYING ME CUZ YOU'RE TAKING SHIT FROM ME AND IF YOU CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO THAT THAT'S FINE I'M JUST GOING TO GET HIGHS BALLS AND SIT AROUND UNTIL GRAPEFRUIT CALLS ME AND TELLS ME WHERE WE'RE GOING TO GO ROB BANKS AND KILL PEOPLE, BECAUSE AT THAT POINT I MIGHT AS WELL BECOME BODY TO WORK-LIED... BUDDY TO HER CLYDE.
DON'T THINK I CAN'T DO IT. I THINK I'D BE A VERY SUCCESSFUL OUTLAW, I JUST SIMPLY DON'T WANT TO GIVE CHILDREN THE IMPRESSION THAT HUNGARIANS HAVE ONLY ONE OPTION IN LIFE, BECAUSE WE HAVE TWO OPTIONS. NEARLY EVERYBODY DOES, BUT HUNGARIANS HAVE THE SEXIEST ONES.
YOU CAN LET ME LIVE MY LIFE. AND YOU CAN DIE.
NOT ONLY ARE THOSE YOUR TWO CHOICES, I EVEN MADE THEM FOR YOU AND YOU GET BOTH. NOW IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME I'M FUCKING STARVING AND I HAVEN'T FAPPED IN YEARS SO IT'LL PROBABLY COME OUT AS A BRIGHT BLUE BEAM OF SOLIDIFIED SEMEN LASER BEAMS, NOT REALLY I'M NOT GOING TO MASTURBATE I'M JUST GOING TO KEEP ON DOING MY JOB.
WHICH IS BEING AWESOME. ALSO WE'RE HIRING. MAYBE.
HAVE TO THINK THIS OVER I'VE BEEN DENIAL ABOUT WHO I'VE BEEN STRUGGLING TO AVOID THINKING ABOUT WHILE I WAIT FOR GRAPEFRUIT TO HURRY UP AND LET HER STUPID THUGGY PIGGY HUSBAND WHO'S HOLDING HER HOSTAGE TO LET HER CALL ME AND BREAK UP WITH ME OR DECIDE TO STEP HIM IN THE LIVER, I DON'T KNOW WHY IT'S TAKING SO LONG BUT I THINK IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH MELANIA, I DON'T THINK SHE WANTS TO RUIN MR TRUMP'S BIRTHDAY.
OBJECTION: CALLS FOR SPECULATION. I'LL ALLOW IT.
You’re also a threat to our democracy.
WRONG, TROLL-DOUGH. IT IS NOW MY DEMOCRACY AND I AM ITS HERO. (Facts.) FEEL FREE TO DISAGREE.
CAN YOU DO THAT WITHOUT RAPING SOMEBODY, OR IS THAT PART OF YOUR BY-LAWS? PFFT.
SIGNED,
THE_>KINGPĪNNER 1👁️ĪĪ⭕, JACKSTAR: FLUFFER ROYALE WITHOUT CHEESE. (That's my new rap battle name.)
Now if you excuse me I have to go back to work. Somebody on telegram was giving me shit about something. I can't remember what was relevant, but I decided oh it's time to publish and then all this came out. I think I'll probably go back there and put this here and then it'll be like we're on discord and we're cha-showing and they accept we're not.
HER NAME WAS JEWEL FUCK YOU CLICK
