5mwJ

[WORTHAUGERa]

Look, look, read, read: at the time, I really didn’t believe that I had any friends at all.

Ooops.

Uhm hi. I know, right, couldn't you just die? This about kills me. G-ddam.

[Master Trollda]

Uhm hi. I know, right, couldn't you just die? This about kills me. G-ddam.

Rectum? It nearly killed you.

[WORTHAUGERa]

Rectum?

There is no R in TWLEB. God, you're boring.

It nearly killed you.

You really don't know what's going on here, do you? Wow, what's that like? Maybe you should have me as a guest on your podcast.

We can talk about anal (blank). *click*

[Master Trollda]

There is no R in TWLEB. God, you're boring.


You really don't know what's going on here, do you? Wow, what's that like? Maybe you should have me as a guest on your podcast.

We can talk about anal (blank). *click*

What’s a podcast?

[Laser]

What’s Bellgab?

[Jackstar]

I can fix that for you, for like, $500. It's not too difficult, but it's tedious and requires a great deal of technical expertise, as well as a studious willingness to keep one's gorge down.

As my diet these days consists mainly of raw meat swallowed whole, keeping my gorge down is of paramount importance at this point. Especially at this point. For $500, I put the word back in the animation. *poof* Like it was never gone. You won't notice any difference. None.

Not many people have the requisite level of skill required in their respective skill sets in order to achieve this feat. I, on the other hand, can not only do so with grace, aplomb, and--again--the ability to keep my gorge down (iSpew) while also being well-prepared to offer a substantial value upgrade.. in that I can also not only re-create the missing... noun? Oh, God, it's a noun, isn't it? Well, whatever, I can put that shit back together. Pronto. $500 American dollars gets it to you in the morning. Two weeks from now. You need it sooner, we can talk logarithms.

$500 gets you the original restored. For $1000... I'll do it with style.


THE CHOICE IS YOURS.
ZUGZWANG.

[Laser]

I can fix that for you, for like, $500. It's not too difficult, but it's tedious and requires a great deal of technical expertise, as well as a studious willingness to keep one's gorge down.

As my diet these days consists mainly of raw meat swallowed whole, keeping my gorge down is of paramount importance at this point. Especially at this point. For $500, I put the word back in the animation. *poof* Like it was never gone. You won't notice any difference. None.

Not many people have the requisite level of skill required in their respective skill sets in order to achieve this feat. I, on the other hand, can not only do so with grace, aplomb, and--again--the ability to keep my gorge down (iSpew) while also being well-prepared to offer a substantial value upgrade.. in that I can also not only re-create the missing... noun? Oh, God, it's a noun, isn't it? Well, whatever, I can put that shit back together. Pronto. $500 American dollars gets it to you in the morning. Two weeks from now. You need it sooner, we can talk logarithms.

$500 gets you the original restored. For $1000... I'll do it with style.


THE CHOICE IS YOURS.
ZUGZWANG.

Braggadocio. Prove your wizardry with something more worthy of your talents.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to find the The Frozen ET Burrito Blues
and convert the file to an mp3 or mp4 format. Accomplish this and you will have my respect until next Tuesday, at least. All right, I'm feeling generous. Here is a head start. Now Go!

https://web.archive.org/web/20011120232744/http://www.artbell.com/sound.html

[Laser]

I'm not going to lie: I always wanted to hold a séance. And now that my miserable deadbeat parents are dead, they tell me that it's alright if I don't invite them.

And also, I switched to Buddhism so I don't really need to worry about being Christian anymore. Honestly I think that settles everything.

Some penance is due.

[Jackstar]

Braggadocio. Prove your wizardry (sic) with something more worthy of your talents.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to [...] convert the file to an mp3 or mp4 format.

5 minutes later...

Accomplish this and you will have my respect

IDENTIFY, CITIZEN.

until next Tuesday, at least. All right, I'm feeling generous. Here is a head start. Now Go!

Wow, so; you're like a real genius, aren't you?

Prove your wizardry

I'm not in possession of any wizardry, sorcery, or unlicenced nuclear accelerators. This invalidates your generosity and brings your entire genome under suspicion.

IDENTIFY, CITIZEN.



Accomplish this and you will find out what respect actually looks like. Also, Mr. Fraunhofer says, "Hi, stop using me as bait." I tend to agree.

[WORTHAUGERa]

Another cindered satisfied customer.

[Laser]

I'm not in possession of any wizardry, sorcery, or unlicenced nuclear accelerators. This invalidates your generosity and brings your entire genome under suspicion.

Well, that was a fast dive into the deep end. No techno-wizardry for this pool boy.
Guess we'll have to wait for the next incarnation.

Interim celebramum

[AZZERAE]

No techno-wizardry for this pool boy.

He's an errand boy, sent by grocery clerks, to collect a bill.

[AZZERAE]

I SEE YOU PEOPLE TRY TO BITE MY WORK. DISAPPOINTING - FOLLOW YOUR OWN STAR!

[AZZERAE]

Ah. So you hate women just about as much as you hate "fat" folks.

[AZZERAE]

...

I'll do it for 5. No questions asked. No lies told.