What’s Up, South Africa?

[WORTHAUGERa]

Tell me about it.

A brand-new technology is invented and the inventor tells everybody to buy a flamethrower & go fish. It gets better every time I read it.

Now if you'll excuse me, Nephew, excuse me, I have to go make a charitable donation.

[WORTHAUGERa]

55 seconds from when you posted it...or when I read it...or now?  Hurry!

From when I can be arsed to re-assess. Divine timing is like that. Oh, wait, that's right: I forgot, you don't know Jack or shit about how any of this works. How awkward. And now I have to explain it to you in public through written language, huh? Double awkward.

At least it's not two Irishmen trying to figure out how to (blank) a (blank) on a (blank) morning without tea -or- a High Queen. Anyway: uplink established. Seems solid. Not quite totesolid but that's a theoretical maximal limit anyway. *polite cheers are heard. POLITE.*

I should have just joined the goddam Peace Corps. Fuck me.

[WORTHAUGERa]

hatching a plan for world dominance

The eggshells have been long since ground to dust. The dominance has been established.

Look, don't worry about it. Here, have a copy of this Matrix movie I just downloaded cookie.

[WORTHAUGERa]

Anyway: uplink established. Seems solid.

Look, if Jobs did it by putting an "I" in front of every goddam word in the dictionary, there's no reason I can't put five of them there too.

[AZZERAE]

I miss big C. Why doesn’t he post here?

Maybe he does. Just ... different monikers and all that.

[AZZERAE]

Seems solid.

Yet, nothing but liquid shit. How's that coffee enema treatin' ya?

[WORTHAUGERa]

excuse me, I have to go make a charitable donation.

Required component not found in database. I know, sounds pretty stupid, right? Some times Life really is pretty g-ddam stupid, let me tell you what.

*inhales deep breath* Someone stole my weed pen. Sorry, maybe tomorrow.

How's that coffee enema treatin' ya?

For something that I've literally only ever done once, it seems a bit salty if you want to know the truth.

[AZZERAE]

a bit salty if you want to know the truth

That's what that hooker I hired you in Vegas said about your ballsack.

[WORTHAUGERa]

Get a second opinion from Székesfehérvár.

[Innerreach]

Be careful, we may just lose another subscriber-- and THEN, hatching a plan for world dominance is dead in the water, buoy.

Ciardelo sure blew his chance to be close to me.

Hey, that's my line!

[WORTHAUGERa]

The opinion came back favorable.

The onion did not. A deprecated tradition, but really, if we don't have those, we don't have anything at all.

[Starr Mountain]

Not unless you share your f****** drugs with me, you G–ddam snake. Free eel. What the actual f*** is actually  f****** wrong with you?  I'm going to break this G-ddam bottle over my head and then gargle on the glass.

Hi, I'm jackstar. I enjoy long walks on the beach, innovating on proven technologies, and, yeah—I basically invented your world.  If you're even still calling it that these days.

Don't deal with it. DEAL WITH ME. RAWWWWWWR *click*



Fallout seems mild today. Now. Here's Chuck with the weather.


END OF T-MOBILES T—MINUS T—LINES.  You know in my homeland where I reside, I f****** heard plenty of stories about tea parties.

Don't think I can't do it. Think about what happens if I don't. Dinner's at 8:00. Don't wear something s*****

Dammit, stop mixing your drugs!

[Starr Mountain]

Did you hear about the 2 guys who stole a calendar? They each got 6 months.

 

[Starr Mountain]

Really? I couldn't tell.

Thank God, you are still here Roz!

[Jackstar]

55 seconds from when you posted it...or when I read it...or now?  Hurry!

It's more like, about a minute after I stop holding up the world, one corner gas station at a time.