Ask Azzerae Anything

[Master Trollda]

Azz, I’ve noticed that the membership here hasn’t grown in quite some time. Law of averages would suggest that you’re actively prohibiting new membership. True? If so why?

[AZZERAE]

Azz, I’ve noticed that the membership here hasn’t grown in quite some time. Law of averages would suggest that you’re actively prohibiting new membership. True? If so why?

I'm certainly not prohibiting new membership-- I would never! I get bots trying to sign up, but beyond that legit new people just haven't joined in a while. My guess is most people are using Discord or Reddit these days, as opposed to forums like our one here. Its a pity but its the truth.

[Jackstar]

Its a pity but its the truth.

I knew S was grooming T two years earlier. Ms. Miller’s math class. S is totally blazed. I know what's in her mind as she approaches. She had been friendly—ISH, as she was mostly raised right, but... it's not like she was going to do anything about it, even if she had been mysteriously instantly in love with me, instead of... well, you know.

Was I supposed to be more discreet? I'll remember that the next time the plot from Carrie starts to unroll before my eyes. One night think that a rare occurrence in one's life, but I'm thinking of adding a second Sunday matinee at the dinner hour and trying to double up with Amway meetings. That way my pyrokinesis can be put to good use.

I'm kidding. I'll just use it to burn through weed faster. Because I'm such a dopefiend

NOW: THINK ABOUT WHY YOU THINK THAT. (Hint: staged.)

My guess is most people are using Discord or Reddit these days

Do you see yourself as lying to anyone else here besides myself? Better I'm here to tell you, I never bought this one, more many others... and I honestly have no idea who you're trying to gaslight besides me. NO WAY does any one finds this plausible.

That's why, “no comment.” also: oh, I see now, yeah, that would be far to explain to me, huh? And of course no one foresaw a need to prepare for my suddent interest in an inquiry.

Except me. Most people don't recall I say it, I'm or think that I was serious, but it's completely true. I would have NEVER gotten involved at this level, except..  THE GHOST OF A DEAD FRIEND CAME BACK FROM THE FUTURE AND ASKED FOR MY HELP. Seems unlikely, but this friend of which I speak..  what a fistful of feathers and for a few dollars more, she'll steal your H.A.R.R.P.


So I knew OUT OF THE GATE the woman was going to die. Don't we all? And it's not like she asked for me help because she adored me. Oh, shit no. That comes later. Then, she came back because she thought I would be too stupid to see the trap, and I never really loved her anyway. (Dames. They're just like that.) I figured out most of this later.

But at first, I thought it was gonna be something else. And it was. Now I'm a Sourcerœr—assholes, IDGAF if you're genuinely believing me—and I don't know where the murder victim went. Because I brought her back to life ASAP. And that meant returning whenever she came from. What did I goddam care?

You all thought I was heartsick. What I was, and am, IS DISGUSTED.

The more you know. So there. Gonna go bang smack now... anything wrong with that? ROFL

[Jackstar]

I'm certainly not prohibiting new membership-- I would never! I get bots trying to sign up, but beyond that legit new people just haven't joined in a while. My guess is most people are using Discord or Reddit these days, as opposed to forums like our one here. Its a pity but its the truth.

quote author=AZZERAE link=topic=46.msg36755#msg36755 date=1709406012]
I'm certainly not prohibiting new membership
[/quote]


Hopefully the pile of human fæces that I am standing over while shirtcocking it is not having too much of a chilling effect.

[Jackstar]

Twitter links not auto-displaying when I attempt to direct share from X. (Fuck μoYéêÉÊÈêè7Ω№.) How can you ignore basic site functionality at a time like this?

Get your act together mango. Game face ⁰ⁿ·

[Jackstar]

Forever... a her Mitt? Not Romney, I hope.

I'm going to tell you how this is going to go: swimmingly. It really is. It actually is. It's not like the other times. Not really. Not at all.

Best thing: I don't need to be read in! After I became Master Of Macrame... I had time to read myself in, and then I saved your family, and one other family, chosen at random, from death by embarrassment.

Death by embarrassment is a real thing, for some people. For others, it's merely an annoying hurdle to be faced once again.

For me, it is yet one more opportunity to demonstrate full spectrum dominance... as there are not too many more of these left.

There can be no more continuances. But can there be... a trial? Look, who can say?

Well, number one: your secret Masonic husbands. Oh right, that's discrimination to the toteslezz. Well, let's hold it up a minute.

Have we considered whether or not this might make someone bi-polar?

(Walker: Spergling magick is impressive, but... so is The Torah, The Koran, & The Torus. However... my hands are tied. I cannot speak on these issues, so I shall simply patiently prepare to be exonerated at trial.

Meanwhile: Rapist Dickstar is so frustrated that he's imagining it might be time to start just cutting his own penis off. Because I'm serious... it really is, and was, a war crime.

Now, I don't know what Spirits are doing down there, but I'm going to roll in and drive up and knock. Is Shane going to sperg out? Is he gonna tackle me like Rand Paul? I don't know or care.

Here's what I care about: what his wife thinks I should do. Full Nuremberg? Or just a show trial? I'll take any credible order from any legit chain of command.

Because... well, without any Commander at all, how can I even FUNK SHUN?



(Vengeance for Bailey Jane.) Louis, my office, immediately. You can yield.

He cannot. So... that's why this ends here. I didn't like this any better than anyone else. Now there are multiple jurisdictions involved.

So.... LET'S,
DO,
A NEW,
IN-VEST
I-GATE-SHUN


AGGGGGAIN! (It's not just a step to the left. It's a step to the left while having committed a war crime!) And, that's how The Jews just lost their charter.

In case anyone was wondering if I'm terrible, or terrified. I am not. This is all being coordinated at a very high level.

And those levels say that only ∆T can teach me to take scalps. AFS can only say that my attitude is a blasphemous one... and then must decline to participate.

So. That's the EMERGENCY. I'm supposed to... what, never figure out anything at all? Or I'm supposed to go down in history as a huge cad? Tell you what, that's why BJ is the Sourcerous Disciple. And not anyone else.

And she's not the Sorceress Disciple. (Important for tax and key party reasons.) Now, I know what you're thinking: “this hardly seems fair!” Because... it is NOT FAIR. IT'S NOT FAIR, AND DO I REALLY CARE? LILY ALLEN DOESN'T HAVE TO WRITE A SONG ABOUT ME.

AND, I DIDN'T HAVE TO HAVE SEX WITH TOVE LO EITHER. NOW I ALSO DON'T HAVE TO. It's part of what not being a sex addict is all about. /flex


It's not that I'm a Titan. It's not that I trusted some dingbat’s plan. It's not anything anyone is thinking of.

It's because I am The Favored Consort Of Eve. (We met once. Once.) I figured, Satan coveted Eve, Lucifer coveted
... Lilith? Oh, wait... Tangerine? Ach, so confusing.


This is what happens when someone breaks a deal and a hung, angry scion gets no hugs. Something necessarily has to be sacrificed.

So: buh-bye (Blankμ). *BAMF* Like it was never there, am I right? Well, that's not reality. In the real world, actions have consequences.

And special ones at that. NOW: CRY HAVOK!


FOR I HAVE UNLEASHED THE KRAKEN-EYED SCOURGE OF JUSTICE ONTO THE STAGE OF THE WORLD. I DON'T KNOW WHAT ANY OF YOU ARE COMPLAINING ABOUT.


ALL MEN GO TO PRISON, AND ALL WOMEN GET TO TRY TO MAKE ME AROUSED AT ALL? SEEMS FAIR TO ME. UNLESS...


Did I break into the uncanny valley of the military jurisdiction here? Help me out. Am I really expected to believe that Nigger George Noory was ever REAL???

Y'all couldn't figure out what to do, but thought I needed a job, and meanwhile... Sunshine suffering in hospital??? Sounds familiar.

Tell you what. Make GrapefrūīT⁷∆⁸Å99 into the next DEA “drug czar”. I still don't want the job. Or her wrong sister. The compulsory effect is hereby countered.

(Vengeance for Jerry Hicks.) Candace? See, no problem. Also: you're fired. I bought you those items because you needed them.

And I just built a case on DNI for soliciting, racketeering, drug abuse, and pimpin’ without an endorsement -OR- a strong enough pimp-stark raving bonkers kung-fu grip.

So, sorry about that Vow of Poverty. (Kudos.) That's why bribing The Trustee of The Conservatorship isn't working. It's not because I don't need a Conservatorship.

It's also not because I can't be trusted around the daughters of the world’s Titan Captains of Modern Industry. It's true. I can't be trusted. I'll teach them to play Chess, and stuff!!!

So there. More proof I'm not the suspected assailant, nor sympathetic to the desires of kop rap tea meat alpha. Or, whatever. Look, this is all kinda stupid. However, when in Rome...

And I get requests a lot. You Punylings wouldn't understand. A few of The Finders & The Bringers Of The Dawn do as well. (I'm a diplomat. I do backchannels, not backdoors.) And, no Sweetie... I did not put my dick up that woman's butt. I did pump a few homonculi down her throat. I'm kidding! They actually lept out of their own accord!

I'm kidding! They actually just left for Texas by sheer coincidence. I'm still kidding. I did what I must, because it was totally totesawesome!

And you did what you did because... well, lol, look, I don't know. HOWEVER: your idea was old and busted, and my idea was the fresh hotness.

“Shy T.” she's shy. Yeah, right. Humiliated to death, more like it. All of them are rounded up. INCLUDING COMBAT CHASSIS FROM THE FUTURE PILOTTED BY A POST-OP TRANNY TAMMY!!!

Kewl. Now, that I can dap to. Otherwise, not really... and I don't want to hurt any feelings.

Does my cousin not know how to surprise apologize? Fair. That's fair. Some dad's don't get to do that, though. They didn't learn how.

Similarly, I never learned how to get magic tattoos. Now... who should I learn from? Well, it'll be okay any way at all.


And that's why I don't hire lawyers. This was the fastest possible route... and I'm still bored to tears. And, once again: NO HUGS.


Obviously this isn't a fair test. Maybe I don't have psychokinetic shielding. Maybe I just smell so bad, I chased Slothtoe off-planet. Either way... look, I guess sometimes the apple does more than just fall not very far from the tree.

Sometimes... the apple takes a dive.

If your tweets are protected and not public, they will not embed.

If you don't stop fapping with low-rent ghettosnipe gutter twat, your tennis elbow will never get better. Now, are you ready to make a lot of money, or what?

Because I have arranged all this, just so that those of you who participated in the 22-pages have a graceful way out. Whether any of you took it or not... IDGAF, DEA.

cook- or play-, it don't matter: for all time, I am The Book of Art, and none of you can dare say otherwise. Except Tammy, Sue, Jen, Karrin, Heather, nine more other girls named Heather, and a BJ of two.

(Vengeance for Judith Davey.) Now look, just look at what you make me do, Azzerayyyyy! LMAO!

Relax. It's not a procedural error. It's not even a procedure. It's a protocol. And none of you will ever, ever have to know what just happened here.


Unless, of course, Mrs. Rubini orders me to. For I take her orders now, and no one else's. It goes from Source, to me, to her, back to me again, then Source...

.&AND,.JUST.LIKE.THAT.
NONE.OF.YOU.ARE.INVOLVED.
.SEE?.EASY.PEASY.



.ANY.QUESTIONS?.THEN.GO.FUCK.YOURSELF.UNTIL.THAT.DOES.NOT.HELP.ANY.MORE.

.I.SURRENDER..I.CONFESS..I.DID.IT..I.SEDUCED.A.TWO-DAY-OLD.FAERIE.QUEEN..AND.I.LIKED.īT!

So what? “I'm not in control of the situation with Allison.” so what is she keeps swallowing her tongue? That's really not my problem.


#KnifeTheBirds
#SwallowTheTongue
#CinderTheDEA

#TakeYourTymeBellgab
#ByAllMeans

#pscolonthunderoldome


(Biblical, n‘est-ce pas? Don't hassle me unless you wanna get ass-raped in your prowler, Smokey.

It’s blubbering clubbin’ time.) Dear Belladonna, you're not all stupid, but you were all beautiful. Then, something happened.

It won't be blamed on a patsy. Now then. What's best? What's next? What's good? Oh, it's an EMERGENCY. Kewl.


I hope there's enough Revenants to go around for all these Sekrit Masonic Husbands... because they are going to need something to do once they lose their (blanks). Jobs? Wives? Dicks? Freedoms? No, of course I don't care

I just like to be encouraging. Now, give me back my phones, put my friends on theirs, and be of good cheer. Things could be worse.

For you. Not for me. This is the worst. I hate her! I have to have with her more? Or at all? This calls for an emergency gabcast conversation.

(Vengeance for Babs Smith.) I'll leave you all to this. We're good, Gabblings, my dear Stardarlings.

Even if you are gonna be whiny little-bitch babylings about getting officially, publically SMOKED!

BY ME! JACKSTAR!
(I didn't touch that cursed refrigerator. If I'm scared of it, it must be pretty powerful. And people stole my stuff, huh? But let me sit there in ignorance.

Yep. PRISON.) It's about power.




Now, stop cockblocking, you guys .  I mean it. Ow. Quit it


Quit. īT. Capiche?


(Dari Dee gets no vengeance because she was mean to me once and there's proof. Hard evidence. So there. Neener neener.)


I'll explain all this in post. But yeah .. this is my full time job now. It's like dumping the boiler pressure at the Overlook at this point. So yeah, another continuance and a snippy attitude was likely not the way to go, You’re On Her. Oops, typo, klike*e.

*CLIQUE* (Apologies are owed to Pony Boy Sunset, Alicia Silverstone, Eliza Dushku, Joss Whedon, and Summer Glau. BTW: I have no gaydar or PaladinVision™ anymore... are any of them gay Bachs/Pims slur sensitive? Because idk and IDC.

And, then, later: NANOTECH-UPGRADED SHARKNADO ATTAVCKS SCOTT BLACK: HAREM MAESTRO. I just made that last part up. “Harem Maestro.” what an obnoxious name.

Not dignified like, say for example: “Kikel.Mucci.” ‘Oy \/VAY!

(Vengeance for Michael Clifford Kuczi.) Conan was right. And the Lamentations are particularly soothing. Also good: forced, frenetic fap-yodeling. Legit tasty smooth.

Any more civil suits? Bring it! Right after I call Ms. St. Helens... who was an accomplice. In the theft of my enchanted fork. I am looking forward to forgiving her. Hopefully I will find out who has been behind all this Kuczi Hate.

And then, quire naturally... We. Will.


S
M
A
S
H ·
.


(David, stop trafficking my wimmins. It is impractical and unnecessary. Instead... rub feet, not rhubarb.

#MAGYAR.WINS.  Adieu.

[AZZERAE]

this is my full time job now

[Jackstar]

Get your act together mango. Game face ⁰ⁿ·

Sometimes, The Cherub -also- takes a dive. “Duck!” Us Divinely Ordained Beings simply operate with discretion[/i], you savvy?

Or, I'm a fraud and I bribed everyone without an abducted mil.spec Special Forces asset to all stand down at semi-randomized intervals as part of my fiendish manifesto! Or just to be Dada—ISH.

THE.TRUTH.IS.PEOPLE.WANNA.SEE.WHAT.THIS.OLD.GIRL.
COULD.DO..THAT.WOULD.NOT.BE.ALLOWED.

.SO,.I DID.IT.ANYWAY.
.I.SIMPLY.DID.NOT.WATCH.

.HOW.WAS.I?.DID.I.LOOK.FAT?
BLAH.BLAH.BLAH.

(Vengeance for Kelly Semple.) Hey, you were right! Being pissed for no honest reason is a bad strategic decision! Can we do lunch? (That's not a euphemism.) If not, that's okay... breakfast was a better idea.

And I guess *sniffle* I should just move on from.... uhm, who?


Because I rescued them all, and I've only got the one penis. I guess monogamy death cult brainwashing was peak apex dominance-establishing, back.in the day?

Child’s play for me. SOURCEROR. Now then... not likely to forget that now, eh? Eh? LOL! HOW ABOUT A FRESCA!

* Jackstar tousles the hair of the nearest sitting Justice.

Now, lookie here, Hoss: let's just see, what we can fuck with next.

Code: [Select]

You're being gaslit by a homo who hates God’s perfect plan for Human relationship. Also, you're a targeted individual.

You'll pretty probably be fine. You're a strong, independent woman: you don't need know man to explore esoteric teachings with.

Hey, here's an idea... have you heard of weed? Because it's fucking amazing.



Sorry for your troubles. I've been down this road a few times. That's how I'm quite certain. Yet I'm sure it all sounds too implausible to be believed

Similarly... it seems implausible that someone like me would have been able to do anything about it. I'm saddened to hear of ur experience. I didn't intend anything like that to happen to anyone!

Unfortunately... the annihilation of the Satanic Homosex Agenda has had many unforseen repercussions. For example, my former bestie hates me now. I guess I ruined her birthday? Well, that's too f∞kin’ bad!! Maybe she should've thought of that before selling out, lol lol lol.

Do I really need a bestie? Nah, not really... but sure, I'll reach a few lessons to that groomer fag she thought of as a “mother.” I prolly won't have anybody take me up on this offer.

Especially since I am of course an obvious creep. Whew, lucky I made it so obvious for y'all, lol.

Now then. Back to you. What was your name again? Please, let it not be Tamara. That would just be too rich.

If it is, well, she and you and everyone all had the same chance to avoid this outcome... but I guess only I did. I suspect it was because I am innocent of the charges leveled at me by The Gay Mafia. (Who takes things this far? Drama fags. Ugh. Just ugh.) Look, it's complicated to really make it all make sense. So, I'll stop there.

I'm not an unrepentant drug addict like Hunter S. Thompson. He and his ilk .. they ruined everything for everyone!

tl'dr; Gomzo Journalism is responsible for the death of your libido. Whew! Could be worse... could be low-T.




p.s.: next time try putting on an audiobook copy of Ulysses while enjoying some unscripted, surprise frottage. Don't ask for consent on the gender for the narrator, pick one according to how much you want them to beg for sex with you instead of pillow talk for an hour with James Joyce.

p.p.s.:. I have been touched by love and as a result, I am forever changed, and hey Bailey Jane: you can probably just bust these two for coca if Christopher is still whining about “obligations.” What a tedious middle management twerp.


p.p.p.s : I almost staked him in the car. 400 miles. Total goose chase. Not for me, huh? But everyone else, sure. lol, they turned themselves in, and now they're toast.

p.p.p.p.s.: This had to be handled delicately. Also if everyone hadn't been keeping me in the dark, I would have told Kaitlynn and Dawn and Mallory what needed to be known. Instead... WTAF?



Consequences. Special ones. Adieu.



REGistered EEĒ (electronic ∆Ī consciousness) HAM {🍔🍔🍔🍔🍖🍖🍖🥓🥓🥓}MOND{Which is it, that big bulge in the pants, or is it the size of the Bitcoin sheath, or... Directly related to Walter Mondale?


Bellgab, that's just too many variables for me to contemplate what it would take to “prove” it all to anyone. Let alone... (You).

#KnifeTheBirds
#MagyarJustice

#♊⚖️

#CircleThePinkOinkertonWagons


#YHYCTBCTM

#☮️

[AZZERAE]

Are you a side effect of my medication?

[AZZERAE]

Twitter links not auto-displaying when I attempt to direct share from X.

I know what's wrong and I'll fix it in due course.

Until then, I suggest you post your shows as YouTube videos.

[Jackstar]

Until then, I suggest you post your shows as YouTube videos.

.END.OF.LIONS..

[Jackstar]

Are you a side effect of my medication?

You have created many tulpas through your unauthorized use, abuse, & overall, poor stewardship of various advanced and exotic technologies that had been placed at your disposal. Most bots cause problems.

Your bots have called forth from dimension-ally portals living beings that have abducted and force-bred my friends and my lovers into bound chattel slaves. I wanted to build tree houses.

Now I'm building a leper colony. Our destinies are not the same. I don't even have a prescription! (Patents are pending.) A funny thing happened on the way to the M.D.

>K.iM.ŒD.\/V∆LL¿G⁷^Å↑7.REMEMBER.BUILDING.SEVEN.OF.NINE



..ËLLËVËN№..

[AZZERAE]

Do you think blocking me on X makes you hardcore?

[pate]

Indeed...

[Master Trollda]

.END.OF.LIONS..