The BellGab Bakeshop

[K_Dubb]

I know it is possible to do because my mom got one from Harry & David that was beautifully set and so tart it made your nono pucker.

[K_Dubb]

I can only respond to messages that my Mockingbird handlers allow me to see long enough to read.

And I am one pretty f****** slow reader, let me tell you. I'm still reading working through my Valentine's Day cards from 1995.

You are perfectly useless, I will just ask bunny.

[Jackstar]

You are perfect

So jelly.

[pate]

Hey, that's a good idea. It would be a great excuse to go to the French Quarter too! Do you want to go with me?

I'll check out kumquats too, maybe mix them in with other oranges.

Sure, it's been awhile since I visited the ancestral homeland.

Road trip or fly in?  I vote for a road trip, I love driving through the Ozark Mountains although there is that long stretch of nothing in N. Louisiana that is about as boring as driving through Kansas.

I will want to visit my grandmother, aunts, uncles & cousins and at least drive by my 40 acres.

My aunt has a Meyer Lemon tree that should have tons of lemons when the Satsuma season is in full swing.  Those make incredible marmalade and Lemon Meringue pies.

If school is still in session I will have to be back in KC for my Tuesday & Thursday classes, so it would have to be a weekend trip.

I can provide a canine traveling companion, what is a road trip without a goofy dog riding along?  Mongo Lloyd would probably be the best bet:  Flipper McGee is too crazy and Hanz II is gigantic.  I think all three of them would be too much.   One might even be too much, you decide on the dog thing.



An Adventure!  The Quest for the Mythical Satsuma Orange.  Maybe K_Dubb will be inspired to write an epic poem about it?

It might just be crazy enough to work, I'm in.

[K_Dubb]

🥳🎉I am trying not to get too excited yes an Epic Poem!  Though as is well-known that English has no rhyme for “orange” and the only thing that rhymes with satsuma I can think of is tumor I think the first time I talked to Roz about baking she was juicing limes for a key lime pie not key limes just regular limes that whole key lime thing is a scam they don’t even use those little fuckers to make them in key west can you imagine what a pain in the ass to squeeze those little buggers one by one so there has been a citrus theme to this whole endeavor from the beginning ok I’ll shut up now and go prick my crust 🤐

[Worthauger]

that whole key lime thing is a scam they don’t even use those little fuckers to make them in key west

I created a monster, and under my bed it started a trend.

[Roswells, Art]

Sure, it's been awhile since I visited the ancestral homeland.

Road trip or fly in?  I vote for a road trip, I love driving through the Ozark Mountains although there is that long stretch of nothing in N. Louisiana that is about as boring as driving through Kansas.

I will want to visit my grandmother, aunts, uncles & cousins and at least drive by my 40 acres.

My aunt has a Meyer Lemon tree that should have tons of lemons when the Satsuma season is in full swing.  Those make incredible marmalade and Lemon Meringue pies.

If school is still in session I will have to be back in KC for my Tuesday & Thursday classes, so it would have to be a weekend trip.

I can provide a canine traveling companion, what is a road trip without a goofy dog riding along?  Mongo Lloyd would probably be the best bet:  Flipper McGee is too crazy and Hanz II is gigantic.  I think all three of them would be too much.   One might even be too much, you decide on the dog thing.



An Adventure!  The Quest for the Mythical Satsuma Orange.  Maybe K_Dubb will be inspired to write an epic poem about it?

It might just be crazy enough to work, I'm in.

Oh, that's alright. I'm not going to go meet your family, though I'm sure they are lovely. I just thought it would be a good excuse to go to the French Quarter for a day or two. Maybe take the train.

[K_Dubb]

OK here are some sample swatches I thought up while parbaking the shell, this has a lot of poetic potential!

In an orange grove that bordered a bayou,
'Twas there that I first came to spy you,
As you crawled on your knees
For what fell off the trees,
And the air was so hot it could fry you.

On second thought that sounds like it might be kind of stinky especially with a dog though I am sure Mongo is as sweet-smelling a pooch as could be wished so maybe

In the dark, 'neath a spreading Satsuma,
Her beauty no longer a rumor,
A lily-white maid
Gathered fruit in the shade,
And blossoms contrived to perfume her

I will have to work in an alligator or something and whatever sort of conveyance pate uses, perhaps one of those swamp-boats with a boxfan?  This is definitely going to move work on La carotte Whiz Pierre to the back burner for the time being, but I think it is in order.

[pate]

Oh, that's alright. I'm not going to go meet your family, though I'm sure they are lovely. I just thought it would be a good excuse to go to the French Quarter for a day or two. Maybe take the train.

Oh my, you misunderstand me.  You are under no moral, southern societal or familial obligation to meet my relatives!  I however am under all three obligations, and would be remiss in my duty as a someday landed gentry of the area to not call upon my relatives should I be in the area.

Of course, under the rules of Southern Hospitality, you are welcome to join me but certainly not required.  This is probably for the best, should you be unwittingly insulted by the offer of a Ham or Roast Beef sandwich during such a visit, I would be at quite a loss on how to cover that faux-pas.  One the one hand, I could not be indiscreet and inform them of your personal culinary tastes (whatever those may be) as this would be rude under the Code of Southern Gentility to demand anything from one's host.  Nor could I countenance the insult to your person such an offer would imply!  The situation would be quite untenable, as I am sure you have already surmised.

No, for various possible reasons it might be prudent for me to take a temporary leave of you for perhaps a half-day and tend to my personal affairs in the area.  Should the unforeseen possibility of our not getting along famously occur:  a brief reprieve from my or your company might be welcome to one or both of us.  I doubt the likelihood of that scenario, however.  So however painful it may be, it will be necessary for me to beg your leave to go visit my family.

I like the train idea.  I haven't ridden on a train since my last trip to Europe, I had honestly not even considered that as a means of conveyance, how wonderful that you have!

Perhaps I could rent a car for a day, and make the trip from NO to BR.  If you like zoos, there is the Baton Rouge Zoo which quite close to the ancestral lands.  I could deposit you there to spend the day while I conduct my affairs, I think there is also a public golf course nearby as well if you like golfing...  Or you could stay in the French Quarter and get your drink on?  It is your movie, and you are the director so whatever you like.

There is also the Audubon Zoo, which I don't think I have ever visited, maybe once when I was five or six.  For a touristy schtick you could go see the Tobasco Factory at Avery Island and get a souvenir hunk of salt from the salt dome, I had one at some point but might have eaten it!  Hah, I was a strange child...

I would have to check the train routes, but I imagine we could meet in St. Louis and proceed to NO from there...  Of course, if that frost killed all the oranges this year this whole mad scheme might be in vain.  It is fun to think about though.

[pate]

OK here are some sample swatches I thought up while parbaking the shell, this has a lot of poetic potential!

In an orange grove that bordered a bayou,
'Twas there that I first came to spy you,
As you crawled on your knees
For what fell off the trees,
And the air was so hot it could fry you.

On second thought that sounds like it might be kind of stinky especially with a dog though I am sure Mongo is as sweet-smelling a pooch as could be wished so maybe

In the dark, 'neath a spreading Satsuma,
Her beauty no longer a rumor,
A lily-white maid
Gathered fruit in the shade,
And blossoms contrived to perfume her

I will have to work in an alligator or something and whatever sort of conveyance pate uses, perhaps one of those swamp-boats with a boxfan?  This is definitely going to move work on La carotte Whiz Pierre to the back burner for the time being, but I think it is in order.

Maybe it could be a sequel or pre-quel to "La Carrotte Whiz Pierre" somehow?

That second one, is terribly saccarine:  Hah, I love it!

I don't think dogs are allowed on trains, so Mongo Lloyd might have to remain at home.  Hopefully not to suffer the same fate as faithful Argos, that would be awful. 



He's just a boy...

[K_Dubb]

Here is the tart, you can see the plums were so ripe they melted into goo and I didn't even bother doing that thing where you heat jelly and paint it on to gloss them after the oven dries their surfaces to leather.  Oh well, that's what powdered sugar is for.



The juice of course mostly went into the frangipane, which is of course the design of the thing, and the beauty of these little yellow plums is that, even when as sweet as candy, they preserve a good bit of acidity in the skin.  I have made this tart with Italian Prunes and little green plums and it's not the same at all.

[pate]

No reports yet, but Hurricane Ida may have jeopardized Roz's JaffaSatsuma Orange Cake plans this year.

LSU AgCenter does not yet have any reports of damage from this storm to the citrus crop, but I imagine in the coming days they will.

Here's some pictures of what sorts of crop damage you can expect from previous historical storms:





I don't know why, but what bothers me most about that last image is the loose tie-down rope (or whatever it is) flopping around under the wing.  My inner aviator would not "let that fly," but I guess there could be a good reason for it?

Anyway, I cannot imagine that this storm will have no impact on this year's harvest.  I believe the "Satsuma Season" typically begins about a month from now with the first harvest, and continues to around Christmas time when it starts to peter out.

Sustained winds 60-70mph with gusts up to 140mph are probably going to knock more than a few heavy unripened Satsumas off the branches, if not break the hell out of said branches.

To my knowledge, it is still officially a "State of Emergency" and has not been declared a "FEMA Disaster Zone" yet.

Roz:  you might want to start looking at Satsumas from other states:  I bet Alabama, Mississippi & Florida have orchards.  Georgia is worth looking at, and of course *spit* California.

As for an excuse for travel to New Orleans;  if you think assisting in the clean-up effort sounds fun, I suppose we could go do that instead.  I will note that part of the reason I ended up in Key West was that my lady friend at the time thought it would be a good idea to go help assist in the Hurricane Andrew aftermath of 1992.

We were stopped at a Military Checkpoint as suspected looters, a rifle was pointed at my head (I didn't notice that, but she did and it freaked her the hell out) and we were instructed to "Get the hell out of here."

Andrew was a Category 5 and Ida was "only" a Category 4 so maybe it won't be that bad on this one.  Nautical Shore on that, but perhaps a "rain check" (ha-ha!) is in order on the New Orleans thing?



Pretend that the Garlic & Onions are Satsuma Oranges in the above image

[Colonel Pate Manly]

Jacky where is my rhubarb pie recipe she was trying to tell you but you just ignored her.  If she won’t tell me where to find her hot brother with a canoe the least she can do is tell me how to thicken a rhubarb pie without dulling the acidity.

I know it is possible to do because my mom got one from Harry & David that was beautifully set and so tart it made your nono pucker.

🥳🎉I am trying not to get too excited yes an Epic Poem!  Though as is well-known that English has no rhyme for “orange” and the only thing that rhymes with satsuma I can think of is tumor I think the first time I talked to Roz about baking she was juicing limes for a key lime pie not key limes just regular limes that whole key lime thing is a scam they don’t even use those little fuckers to make them in key west can you imagine what a pain in the ass to squeeze those little buggers one by one so there has been a citrus theme to this whole endeavor from the beginning ok I’ll shut up now and go prick my crust 🤐

OK here are some sample swatches I thought up while parbaking the shell, this has a lot of poetic potential!

In an orange grove that bordered a bayou,
'Twas there that I first came to spy you,
As you crawled on your knees
For what fell off the trees,
And the air was so hot it could fry you.

On second thought that sounds like it might be kind of stinky especially with a dog though I am sure Mongo is as sweet-smelling a pooch as could be wished so maybe

In the dark, 'neath a spreading Satsuma,
Her beauty no longer a rumor,
A lily-white maid
Gathered fruit in the shade,
And blossoms contrived to perfume her

I will have to work in an alligator or something and whatever sort of conveyance pate uses, perhaps one of those swamp-boats with a boxfan?  This is definitely going to move work on La carotte Whiz Pierre to the back burner for the time being, but I think it is in order.

Here is the tart, you can see the plums were so ripe they melted into goo and I didn't even bother doing that thing where you heat jelly and paint it on to gloss them after the oven dries their surfaces to leather.  Oh well, that's what powdered sugar is for.



The juice of course mostly went into the frangipane, which is of course the design of the thing, and the beauty of these little yellow plums is that, even when as sweet as candy, they preserve a good bit of acidity in the skin.  I have made this tart with Italian Prunes and little green plums and it's not the same at all.

Orange = Door Hinge?  Doggerel at best.

"nono"?  Nonces?  Camdles?






Tart?

-CPM

[Asuka Langley]

[pate]

Roz, check this out:



Say, did you manage to find any Satsumas?  It should be peak harvest season right now.

------

I made a few loaves of whole wheat bread the other day that turned out okay (no pics sorry) and last night I was playing around with my Jiffy Clone Cornbread recipe.



Which I have absolutely dialed in for my 8.5" cast iron, but not yet for the 12" one.  I did some math that indicated that the 12" was roughly double the 8.5" in volume which seemed counter-intuitive.  I went ahead and did it anyway (even though I suspected it was wrong).

It is difficult to say for sure, as my digital scale decided to turn itself off right in the middle of weighing out the buttermilk.  <---Sounds like it wouldn't be a big deal, just turn it on and re-weigh you say?--->  Well, that is true, but I decided to put the full jug of buttermilk on the scale (sans cap) and zero the scale.  Then pour the buttermilk into the batter and reweigh until the scale reached a value of -288g.

The scale I used has a range of 2g to ~5lbs(?whatever that is in grams?) and if you exceed that weight it displays a weight of "Err"<--(which should have ellipses following, I digress) ... and then turns itself off in shame.

Apparently, a full half gallon of buttermilk exceeds ~5lbs and the "Err...or" occurred when I added roughly 135g of buttermilk (I didna pay attention, gah).  I had to switch to the emergency "Eyeball Mk-II" back-up scale for the remainder.

This was all for the best, it turned out that my calculated batch was not nearly as voluminous as I had hoped.  The finished cornbread barely rose to fill half of the 12" cast-iron, doubling of the recipe is indicated.

It did have a pretty nice crown though;  I estimate the peak of which was at about 2/3 the height of the cast-iron:  the proportions are solid.

I was also testing to see if the omission of sugar in my Jiffy Clone recipe affected final product/crumb etc (if, for instance, one wants something suitable for Cornbread Stuffing):  It does not.

Though the final product was half as much as expected, it managed to nicely fill a 1/2 sheet pan when crumbled.  That was my aim in the first place (which might be the proximate/ultimate cause of the volume maths error:  Nautical Shore).

--------

I do not know if Candy falls within the scope of this thread.

If so, I am happy to report that the "Caramel Mk-I" feasibility test resulted in an edible product, although I suspect that the meat thermometer I used should be replaced with an actual candy thermometer.  338F was my temperature benchmark, and I think that is at the upper end of my meat thermometer's range, which typically can throw accuracy off (you want to measure temperature in the middle of a thermometer's range ideally).

It didn't quite burn, although there was some smokiness present and when the Caramel cooled to room temperature;  it was dangerously close to "hard crack" stage but retained flexibility.

I would not eat this product if you have crowns on your teeth:  it has surface adhesion properties close to dental glue...

I will shoot for a ~330F benchmark temperature next time and perhaps buy an actual digital Candy Thermometer.

I also established that Heavy Whipping Cream will work for making Caramel, although I do not how that will affect shelf stability:  this may require some sort of environmental control as I intend to coat the final "Caramel Mk-XYZ" recipe in Milk Chocolate.

The Mk-I batch would be great for decorative work though:



I think mine would have been a bit darker brown if I had done that.

Good Thymes!