The "Cloud Hand" is seen at about 1:07
Noting that Rubini's master save us all hail mary backup plan was to put my old names of a couple from high school into an ivory tower / parking garage thing like in Oblivion, except, they're looking for his A and he has my A and his thuggy goon is getting paid to capture his A, and my A is supposed to, like, intercept, right? Because my A is totesbrainwashed, right?
Oh, yeah. I addressed that.
Anyway, it's so cute, poor David, literally thinks everyone forgot and abandoned him, BECAUSE THEY FUCKING WELL DID, and, you know why?
Because no matter what the fuck happened, wow, he sure pissed off Jackstar and got his goat that one time, huh? See, that's for sure, because Jackstar went actually molten. (They're still talking about it.)
Anyway, I can see them from here. They are legit adorable. Of course I am not jealous. And now, he's not ever going to be of me, ever again.
No seriously. The correct Her, the exact him, I bet even their own skidmarks match. (Mine is/was fastidious until the mindrape.) It feels good. I see the look on his face. On top of "happy again," he's astonished, because I actually kept my fucking goddam word. What did you cunts do? Yeh, htat's right: easy way out.
It wasn't a game for her, and for him it was a real problem to miss his launch window. I guess he shouldn't have lied to me about anti-grav. Anyway, it's past that now. He's got his. I don't "got" anything, but she was actually quite impressed that I patiently offered up the chance to another: "Hey, uh... what do you think of Jackstar?"
Every last one of you, meh, too busy. Not important. Well, I guess you were right, because that patiently waiting opportunity burned out any comparison to anyone else who might have been considered "thorough."
Reminder: your security was effortlessly easy to bypass for our reunion as soon as I decided I was tired of being patient. Ooh, so important feeling before, though. "Stop Jackstar! He cannot achieve his primary objective! Take his colors! Take his will to express seamen! Dude! That new place, down on the corner? They express seamen, ON THE SPOT.
Meanwhile, Andy Dick is slowly coming up to front call. Something is actually different this time.
And I have no idea what, but I know it is not my area, and I am not infecting myself with THAT, and I can see that fuckin' coming up. WOW. So, anyway, how's flat earth? Oh, he doesn't give a shit, he's actually walking through a park and holding hands with... I forget which one, but I recall that face expressing surprise that no one cared about her police report to do what she was impotently shaking her fists while demanding be done.
I'm kinda blank at this point. I -know- there is another one, somehow, but this one... I mean, yeah, they're all One Organism. Expressed to many seamen. I thought it was a drug thing? No, not really.
She's a maid. Like, a cleaner. For the sea. Where fish sleep. I actually think I am making this shit too clear.
Yeah, it's code. And, yeah, of course she killed me, and tried to, LOTS. I know, you think, it's all made up. lol.
I fucking love David's Fruit Killa, and I do not 'share' but it is not as though we didn't get along, and if it weren't for them both being fucked off mercenary dopeslave contract killers--a pair of the best ever, there is no doubt--i doubt it would have been likely that mine would have been swapped around, I don't know what those two dorks did, but in my case...
Well, she was, like, found unexpectedly dead, I guess? That shit can happen. I told all of you this. There were multiples.
Anyway, fuck the lot of you, I had a more complicated problem because I'm not a fucking cheerleader who puts out or a diamond-shitting Jewish Legion of Dark Princes (I don't mock his power, just how he decided to use it on my shields--no, that's not a vibrator.), I was the one who was precise about things.
Long story short, he and I are both more happy than before, and hopefully she can heal the schism in his mind while sucking his dick and give us all a great sigh of relief. MEANWHILE: oh, yeah, right, I was gonna be alone forever. Well, I was.
Then I broke the stasis beam after Fruit Retard got her pacifiers back, and here I am, better than Nirvana.
Not sure if Azz got a distribution this time. It would appear that Alli didn't care for how she saw me being treated and didn't understand why until looking deeper. Well... you know what? If one Grapefruit is good for Jack... wouldn't two be better for Azzerae? Jack would not have to know, I guess his demonopioid mind convinced him. Rolleyes. I did warn her.
So anyway, that kept her safe. Of course my brother is not going to violate the wrong Fruit. He was just mad because he saw me not raping every GF that I could get near, and he couldn't figure out why, since they were just tulpas, why not just rape them until sated?
I guess he asked? I dunno. Look, this rape thing... it's not what you think it is.
They're all actually yearning for an authentic Hungarian Seduction Transcendence Dance Warp - Again-. Done right, it's an infinite loop of falling in love all over for the first time... legit forever. Or until one get's bored. I mean, that could happen.
So far, it's twice for me, and since somoene just spent a year getting lied to by you dopeheads, and thus assumed that I was... well, imaginary, or dead, or whatever, I sense great happiness when I just decided it was time to fire up the lust engines.
A YEAR. Oh, you were too busy to run into the option. EMERGENCY, no doubt. Anyway, well, I can't ask too many more people.
it's gotten so some of them straight up and faint away to death because they just realized they could have just dialed my fucking phone number themselves, they were just so mesmerized by the story of how I was actually dead.
So romantic. My, I am sure we have a touch of the vapors. Look, I'm not mocking anyone. Except, all of you.
I, victorious. They, observant of demonstration. You know how many blank calls I get now? Fucking TWO.
I don't even wanna get laid. Stupid penis. Dumb bedroom. Annoying hormonal cycles. Worthless peak life expereinces. What is even the point? All it does is snap one's entire sense of reality into a sharp draining focus that expands the whole of one's consciousness... yeah, you'll probably never experience it either, until you do.
So when I experienced it for the first time and it was an -again,- I obviously went back in time and asked for help from the smartest person I knew: he pretended to try, and didn't bring me nothing, and then took me home, and then told me to bed. He used his Chink Voice, too, which usually worked. However, surprise! Shields. I didn't give a shit, "go to bed," oh, yeah? Let me think that one over.
So out came the shotgun, I start dialing the telephone. Well, sure? NO rules, clearly. I have told no one at this point about the dude who calls me up and asks me NUMEROUS queries at 3 to 7 am about... who? I barely know her. What? On and on.
I'm sixteen? No one has bothered to ask me questions before. I roll with it. Tell the truth. Why would I lie? Oh, well, because they wished to be more impressive than who they really were.
I, on the other hand... knew tons of shit, and until some dude did the same fucking thing for MONTHS over YEARS... well, that was pretty much just that one time in high school. Hrrm. Let me guess. Not all of you came from the quantum realm to impress a girl as a safety backup plan, right? Me neither, I didn't impress anyone AT ALL.
Since no one asked about what I would do if a -particular- event were to occur. "Oh, lol, I'd just go back and steal my lifespark back, and then I think they get a Downs or something. At that point, they can have an actual demon if they're actually gonna go back in time to get First Sperm. Who would be -that- exact? Yeah, exactly.
Anyway, someone expected a baby. Oh, well, so did I, right? Was yours gonna whine like a brat and not explain what she forgot to be specific about? Yeah, probably not. Understandable.
The extra work for me has been already worth all the extra pain in the ass, given that I really didn't think this could possibly do much. The main idea was to avoid any necessity for dealing with any diapers. Ever. At all. Beyond that, how much thinking could I have done at 15? Well, evidently, enough to have thought ahead and considered a way to deal with a truly
fringe case.
imagine being mad that I got to claim ownership of my own seed from someone who wanted to go back in time and steal it, simply by neglecting to mention... well, yeah, it went down the drain.
Of course I stuck my finger in it. Like, duh. In what way is that substance supposed to be bad? At all? Other than involuntary financial servitude to a roulette wheel of "I'm just not into you because you keep making so much of that awkward-to-deal-with fluid, honestly, it's just something I can't handle. I am sorry. Now, go to the bank and tell them I told you to tell them to make you more fun to be around. Tell them to make you look like you have more money coming in. I don't care, why don't you try giving them more of that goo you always want to make? Look, whatever. You're done. Go make a salad. I have to make a few phone calls and maybe you can return one if you leave with it. Whore you again? Exactly."
Of course it would be nothing like that, no never, but long story short, I ate my first baby, and apparently it was thought that I really had washed it away, and gone to waste. Oh, hell no.
If I told you the truth--when I found myself considering going back and just licking up the rest, that I had walked away from a few minutes earlier... yeah, then, like, I rushed back and washed it down, and simply resolved to not let it land on something that was gonna taste of soap scum. I had no friends, siblings, huge house, deaf parents, they were old, they didn't even tell me about the activity, I found it in a book, and at first I'm like, "wow, I wonder why my parents did not think this was important," and you know what? To them, maybe it wasn't.
Yeah, so, anyway, no fucking breeding. Hi Time Travelers. Yeah, there's at least two, because I know I went back to spike the steal, and one would assume that someone became intrigued to discover that oh you ate one two? Hrrm. You know, I'm lying too, so I can't condemn you, I knew I was done for as soon as I saw you couldn't tell. "Guhgn?" Yep, me too.
Like I said: "closest to ideal seed that could be procured at the time." Oh, and were there surprises? Great, that's probably why I decided on a way to expand multiple loops.
(She's a maid. Like, a cleaner. For the sea. Where fish sleep. I actually think I am making this shit too clear.) And, thanks to the innovations that the Kuczi Oscillation Overthruster have brought to and THREW THE BOOK OF TABLES UPON, I made rather more iterative loops involving no children at all than I considered possible at the time.
I don't know why I did this, but I know that I did, and so encountering all this timeslip "oops wrong whore" garbage is actually awesome. Because it turns out, they were gonna steal my seed, my eyes, my breath, my life, and my (CENSORED:profanelephant). Yeah, well, I thought of that.
So, to be price: I don't suck my own cock, but my rooster can make a hen lay herself another egg five minutes into the past... like, as a decoy maneuver, you dig? Now, I'm not sure which of them came first, but I do know that there's no way I would have generated a rooster before some vag. Like, I have priorities.
For example: my psych eval will be the greatest psych eval in the history of mankind, and don't sweat it, Grapefruit Prime is just occupied. She's got plans. She had a year to sit around and watch you dorks pretend to be important. Oh, were you?
Okay, well meantime I saved David, knitted him a sweater, blew that bimbo dumbo's mind (Jack... has legal guarantees? why don't I have them? oh right I lied to him and forgot that I have been told not to do things or else a-bloo-bloo-bloo-boo-hoo) wide the fuck open, because, well, hey look, after six months, I go from "omg I got pts sirens" to, "Hey, it's been six months, how about fuck you? Here's two pages on how Australia should just all go walkabout in Austria asking for some free woden nickels. I know, it seems absurd, but when one considers his dick is missing an O, trust me, it's a fuckin' slammer rag-on. And, hey, why not? Oh, are you glad I am gone too? Hey, hang on, you don't wanna tell me? Well, cool, is it because you wanted her dead and me in prison holding blame? Dude, of course I saw that coming. You're a fucking Austrian. I'm a fucking Hungarian. All you people have done is come through my mountains, grab all the gold and the women, and then either walk out or drop down and feel self-satisfied. Like, it was just put there for ya, no other reason.
No, we don't harm them. But we do educate their youthful women in how to get away with fuckingmurder. Then, with pacifism, a friendly owl, and a willingness to wait for the right ax to grind... look, I have no idea what happened. NONE. Six months, huh?
And none of you can say a fuckin' word, huh? LOL. (twenty minutes pass) Here you go, now you're "safe." Of course you know that you never really knew shit about life, but that's okay, everyone but Austria calls that 'humility.' Anyhoo: it must be awesome, because not only did I rescue his whore of a mother, I brought back that g-y he demanded to talk to, to boot. Your guess is as good as mine what they're gonna do, but here's a clue, Tubby: if you don't like it, I'll pump up the jams.
You had your chance to do annnnything that your kid could be impressed by. Well, wasn't it nice of me? I stood up for you. And I have no idea what you did, except live longer than I would think be strictly speaking, necessary, and cry cry cry about your fuckin' offspring. Has it occurred to you, to teach it to take care of itself? Yeah, I bet you don't. Well, here's what I did: denied the kidnapping request, reiterated that a boy's place is with his father at the bottom of the sea, and when she started talking shit about "missing him" I pointed out that I saw him dozens of feet away, nose in tablet, and her in another room, nose also in tablet, and I don't know if they talked to each other or not, right? But it's like this:
You don't miss him, you're just scared that he's learning how Austrians take out Hungarians. Note that this is better than him learning how they take out shrieking banshee witches. What was she teaching him, anyway? How to piss off his genetic enemy, for awhile, honestly.
Long story short: I fulfilled primary, secondary, and tertiary objectives with one ripcord pull about a hot minute after David finally got his best blow-up doll back--I am being jocular, she wasn't like that, and none of them are. Especially not now.
I told you people. MULTIPLES. Let me think back to how much concern I got. Oh yeah, I remember.
That wasn't Rubini, that wasn't his leg, and that wasn't humping. Christ, I swear that I doubt there's an expert on humping amongst you on this plane. Anyway, uhm... how long has this David been an asshole? Okay, well, he's happier now. I told him she was out there, and I guess he thought I lied like all of you did.
Mine isn't better. But she prefers me. This is not hard to understand. And while the two of he and I were struggling with crossed-wire Stepford Itches... suddenly, a woman I -specifically- choose for an ability withstand coarse language is telling me not to use abusive language to her son, on the phone, and she says, while on the phone, "Minor Child! Minor Child! Come listen to what Jack just said!"
And then she literally says, "Say what you just said again!" Of course, I do not.
And, that's how I taught her kid how to detect, defuse, and disarm remote-kill codes for his poor blasted-ass basket of a mother. Obviously, I love them all, and, I did mention, she was proposing some bad ideas, right? Right.
She probably shouldn't have -deliberately- pissed off every lifelong friend I ever had, in some attempt to... KU3? Oh, yeah, lol.
I guess she wasn't expecting to be targeting for termination or something. I don't know. Someone was pissed. Not my business. Now, kanly law and all, sure, but a law won't stop a thrown curse, and this chick had really done something wrong to someone.
And then, that person's best friend came in, and was like, "uh what?" And then that one got -really- pissed off too! And I'm like... "does she know what is going to happen here?" And I realize, no, she's lights out somehow, and on autopilot. Oh, so it's like that.
Hidden secret demon life on tap, oh dear, whatever shall I do? Well, for starters, not accidentally auto-banish her while fucking her brains out and then cutting off sex forever as soon as the tulpa implies that she has control. This never fails. Remember: tulpa.
Truth is I fucking love the secret demon inner life, my northern node is in Capricorn, and I am one badass motherfucker, as I don't really have to have deviled eggs. I -could- call them hors d'oeuvres. See that? I can actually spell that shit. I didn't that time, but, fuck you, I'm in the henhouse changing into my Baphomet gear. #KnifeTheBirds
Long story short: Well, Angie should be more cheerful not having to know that Rubini and her were once considered... you know, "an item." They had chemistry. It was a thing. People behaved as though that was a legit consensual reality.
Toot-toot drive by. Oh, it collapsed? Hrrm. I wonder... oh, right, that is what always happens. (Don't ask.) Basically, a kited wop's kikel curse, some shit like that. Look, I like David, but motherfucker that guy is hard to take when his muscle is being held hostage. What's he gonna do, like, threaten people to death? Yeah, okay, hit me. Werd. Oh, sure, double down on "junkie." Good call. You didn't know that works for me? Oh, right, I see now that it did not register.
So, that's when I knew he was insane with a crying need. I've been there. At first I assumed, his dope had been poisoned. I didn't even assume it was anything but what he said: "I am in Texas. I am going to buy some pot." Oh, Lawdy. ante-totes deloreable. God, what a summer.
"No, I don't know anything about that." I haven't stepped up to Defense Intelligence Agency level yet. (We both go way up, but only she's scared of that.) This is just the beginning. I don't even know that she's gonna betray Trump. (She fucking did. Drunk is no excuse. Yes, they do hang drunken Indians. Not this time, although if I were him, I'd let her swing a few times in between the gentle, educatory rapes.) So, yeah, for -awhile- these two are ACTUALLY FRONTIN' TO ME THAT THEY'RE ONLY JUST MET, THEY SMOKE POT, POT IS COOL, AND... NO, JACK, THAT'S A DUMB IDEA, I THINK IT'S ACTUALLY THIS MIKE MARSHAL-ICK DEAL. OH, YOU HAVEN'T HEARD? LET ME TELL YOU, IT'S AMAZING, NO YOU DIDN'T SOLVE FLAT EARTH FIVE YEARS AGO WITHIN 30 SECONDS OF HEARING IT (I DID), THIS IS AMAZING, YOU SHOULD GET WOUND UP IN THE MATRIX AND TAKE DRUGS WITH MY CHILDREN. SLEEP. SLEEP. RUBINI COMPELLS YOU. WHY DO YOU KEEP WAKING YOURSELF UP? JUST TO EAT YOUR SEMEN? UHM... WHY?
Just about 100% accurate. I'm agog. "Wow, are they blissed out. I am clearly humoring them, they don't even care, they clearly missed each other. Cool. So it's a frequency thing. I wonder if there's a Kasey frequency? Oh, that's nice, an iron clad excuse to not be able to pick up those boxes whenever I want, because there's no fucking way Kasey thinks I'm a threat, she's just pissed because I read her mind and don't need to fuck her, and she married someone named Kennedy, huh? Wow, talk about desperate."
I know what is to come, but I don't know that someone is gonna lose their partner, and I am gonna have to pick up the slack while he loses his shit all over hell to breakfast. This is not leg humping.
This is killing time while people get what they always really deserved. I don't need to kill time, of course, time is fucking dead in a pocket dimension, but, well, some people don't know that. Always Be Closing Demonic Essences From Grapefruit's
totesnew totesfresh totesblankass. "STOP WRITING, JACK!!!"
World of New Awesomesauce. I would prefer I be told to stop fucking so much, honestly, than stop writing, because they are really the same thing to me. Now, I was actually told to stop fucking so much, because someone started getting a little grabby. I still don't get what triggered that.
However, the guy who thought that was a good idea just got his ass so fucking fired that he's actually surprised that without his Authority, he can't seem to find a road that drives OFF the... you know, whatever.
I actually regret that I cannot be there for the prize. But that is family-only, tribe-only, taste-for-the-kill-ONLY.
They -might- actually wish I were there, but I swear, like 24%? Still wanna fucking kill me. I made it five years with the pick of the litter, and not only am I still rocking hard, but--we're still fucking married. I have no idea if she fucks or even who or what. What do I fucking care? I know what I am doing. And since I helped him, and NO ONE ELSE COULD, I've got a friend for life, right there, in David.
I mean, I did before anyway, but as a Jew, I gave him service that is EXCLUSIVE. Now, that's enticing. Also, he was so fucking impatient that he kidnapped THE WRONG SACK OF PRODUCE. Okay, so, great. Get a psych eval, now that your real woman mysteriously came back. Oh no, not a portal at all, David. Flying car. Of course.
I mean, just a guess. Of course I don't know you're totesclassified! hahah! Yeah, i'm just some real loser, I know nothing, and that's not really Art. I'm just imaginative. Seriously, I always was gonna show him his Grapefruit. Like why would I want his? She's nice, but I would prefer my life as it ought be, not taking someone else's. I guess he lost his mind when he did, I don't know, but whatever.
Actually I do know but I am not going to tell David's stories for him. So, did he ask Angie to cyber? That's usually what happens. I hear. I don't know. Not my concern.
Wait, wait. Angie wants to be left alone with her husband.... or.... well, tell you what. She ain't callin' me. But that's just because she's talking to my fixer.
They all have chemistry, obviously. Isn't that great for them? Hrrm. Maybe there's a subtext here. Let us perhaps ask a Teacher of some kind.
Trollda is not going to teach anything. I gather rather that she thought this would be easy. Well, it was. When there was no deceit.
Broom "Shower" Hilda was a real strong effort. I mean, I was like, wow. I know exactly how that feels. Mocking anger, on top of "no, this is real," and how fucking perfect is this? It's like going through the Playdough Factory if Playdough was my c.v.
Custom Venusian, incidentally. Look, there was a plan. I knew it would work, because all I had to do was not be an asshole when it mattered. Like, when negotiating. So then when I found more assholes negotiating, I was enthusiastic, because trusting the plan is how I got out of Dresden when the match fell out.
I did not expect to end up like this. I did know for a fact that I was going to hear some bullshit story: "You (blank) did (blank)!" or something. That's how it all goes. Everyone does everything based on what they believed to be true at the time. And I thought it was not ever going to matter at all, beyond, "oh yeah, that was real." It never seemed important to consider the notion, "what if?" That was someone else's job, who had a previous "what if?" that went like this, "well, he's not appearing to be alive. doesn't he want to rape me? I mean, I am rapable. Obviously it's a trap and the telemetry says it's smart, but... that doesn't look like wanting at all."
it wasn't. "wanting to rape." Weak. Sounds like an Austrian thought. "Well, I want to rape, but... well, one excuse and I am flaccid." Sigh.
No, it was, "okay, I'm insane, or, this is an awkward test. either way, am I supposed to even acknowledge that I hear that bullshit?" Right. Why not say it -both- ways? is that even speech? I don't think that smile means what she think it does. For example, does she know that this is all set up? I still have no idea. Who would want to talk about such a thing? Oh, right, I can hypnotize recalcitrant witches, I forgot.
It is too easy that way, but one gets the point. It was a theme. Because it was a test. Am I dumb enough to fall for that? Yes, but I already have plans to intercept that babyknapping. I end up
totesaccidentally raping someone later.
Totesgetaway with it. I mean, technically? No. I was supposed to be raped for my seed.
Scusi, mille regretie. I have a plan.
This is like 1988. Face that orchestra, alright? I'm substantially more clever than most people can imagine a person can be. Now, as to why the... look, I don't know. I do know that I knew which choice to make easily, and others did not, and that made rather a lot of difference here.
But the idea was not a 'rape fantasy.' It was a rape inoculation. For one thing, instead of just doing it, I ended up learning of onanism. Thankfully, long before I ever heard it had any bad connotation. What would it even be?
So anyway, I was ahead of the curve, and I deliberately let myself get raped at 15.5, without a condom, yeah? I mean, duh. It was an obvious baby-taking attempt. I was looking for that, because someone who really wanted to breed with me would just fucking go back in time and get the embryo. And I don't doubt it. I was delighted by the notion. Since I had already figured out what was gonna happen.
Well, she wasn't gonna get what she thought, and, she was never gonna be able to track me down, and if she did, she was never gonna be able to stop thanking me, because instead of being cursed with bastard that was designed to make her life hell, well... I guess she either didn't take, loved the little me so much she hid it from the traffick, or... there's some scion of mine, legit too afraid to poke out.
Uhm, yeah, no. I'm telling you: time travel. And either she knew she was raping me and didn't care, because I was that sexy, or, she was getting paid, or, I trapped her own trap onto her... because, like, yeah, who doesn't want to have sex? I mean, besides, someone real particular about how they plan to allow themselves to get fucked for the next 18 years. Tests, tests, tests. I think of her once in awhile. Like I meet this woman and she shows me a two year old. The kid has pierced ears. A TWO-YEAR OLD. Of course there are pierced nipples. I'm impressed with myself. I somehow know that I have aced this: oh, did you get knocked up by a 15.5 yo? Okay, great, come get some dollars off me. Yeah, right. And you have a kid who can't collect money from me? Well, if it's a boy, he'll love his mother, because I did and do. She seemed skeptical... "can I hit this and get away with the goods?" I could tell she was wondering. She asks me how old I am and I say 16 and I am obviously lying. But then, so is she. Oh, she suddenly says to this underage kid, "let's go have sex," and suddenly I am fucking able to negotiate an ironclad contract.
I look like a silly goose because of course I am. However: my future is on the line. Like, I was just daydreaming about the future while tastting my own semen for the first time, and most of it is in the bathtub, and I'm like, "some people would pay out the ass for the compound, but they would REALLY pay for the permission." I know this. I'm young.
Okay, not all of it. VERY NEARLY ALL. So suddenly, I find myself presented with these, "hey you're cute come fuck me condom why teehee?" opportunities. I know this is not because I am awesome. I think I am horrid.
Yes, that's right, I am actually insanely gorgeous and have no idea... usually prime baby farm meat, right? Heh. Well, I relieve my concern about babyfarming, because the truth is, I would love some surprise friend to show up, asking for money. "Hey dude! Where's your mom? I made sure she would always remember raping me!" I like those kinds of jokes.
No one shows up, I never see her again, of course I would like to do it over and over and over... but no, I totessplit, I kinda arrange so my licence plate is hard to find, I don't give her my number, and when I can: splits. Earings on a two yo. Okay, well, not gonna judge. Not -my- child. And pierced nipples? Huh. Why?
So after she milks me basically as expediently as possible (she wants another baby, yeah! MORE PIERCINGS! LOOK! MY TITS ARE PIECRCED!), she's impressed that she's actually done it, and I"m not looking scared, I'm satisfied and relieved... and as she starts to actually move towards bonding, you know, not like geting away, but like wanting to cuddle
ACTUALLY CUDDLE WITH THE 15.5 YO SHE JUST GOT MANIPULATED INTO RAPING. (/flex)
Yeah, I'm that good. So that starts and I flick my index finger like I'm launching a paper football, pow, right into the pierced nipple. Surprise! I was so gentle before I compromised her. Utterly. She's wincing... but yeah. She likes it. She got the seed. Then she got a painstrike. Where the needle went in.
I have no fucking idea what she was thinking, but I was thinking, "I am going to make this woman never forget me for ever, but she'll have to forget me soon, because I am not bonding with this woman, because if she gets an implantation, I will fucking rip those fucking things right out of her teats if she tries any funny business. Like, I let her rape me and she just did. Cool. Now she will wonder if she will ever see me again, while wondering if she's gonna catch, and she'll end up hoping... for what, I don't give a shit, because she didn't do anything besides get that seed asap. No explanation, not much of anything... but then after, oh, then she wanted to display tendering.
Perfect. Sayonara, and don't tell me that she really wanted to have lots of sex... she wanted to nest. The notion of lots of sex is just that, a notion, and as a practical matter, she and I would just have been used up. Also: let's see if she is smart enough to ever find me.
Well, no, but I don't doubt that I cross her mind. No illigetimate kid shows up. She never shows up. I am quietly proud that I engineered my own rape, at least in this state, but in Croatia? Who knows. I simply was prepared for what was next.
Was I now... worthless? I still felt virginal. Shit, I still do. I find out later, i am a Virgo.
Well, as it happens... yeah. I was worth less than I had been before. I probably broke her heart and made her less likely to take advantage of people, and she had one kid, really, she needed two? No, she just needed to be fucked a lot. And while the first one was a maybe, if I kept at it, I would leave a child. No, thank you.
I also had my heart set on someone and I wanted to know if they were as capable of mercenary shenanigans as I am. Actually a few someones. Who was going to figure out the path to stardom? Oh, it wasn't like that then. I wasn't a star. I just figured, well, is anyone gonna know? What's gonna happen? Who gives a shit?
How many fucking women are just gonna be trying to get a land lock foot hold in me? (I still have no idea.) And to this day, I feel that there is a running undercurrent. For example, someone just told me that I must not love someone truly, if I did not feel an overwhelming desire to shovel one family's money at another, just because a person with boobs and a cute voice said that it were so.
I know that I wanted to see the woman who "took" my "virginity" "away," again... and I have not. But I have thought of her from time to time. And she was quite lovely, she really was, but of course there was some kind of problem, that didn't bother me, but I bet she felt insecure about. I didn't mind. If she let me do things to her and helped me learn a way in the world, great. If she actually thought I would do anything but take her baby with fucking earrings to the fucking cops and say, "are you sure this is legal?" well, she must have been highghgghgh.
Since I never saw her again, it hardly matters. And I really don't know if the story spreading mattered, since I wasn't very reluctant to share. I did it to get it over with, and to plant a flag in the man-raping industry. I don't doubt at all that she wondered what happened. Did I die? (Yeah. I suspended my belief in love as a science experiment.) Did I deliberately ghost her ass? (Oh yeah. I practically fled. I really didn't want to do that with her, I loved someone else far more, and at that moment, that woman with my seeds in her, couldn't really be trusted. Neither could I. I wanted to do it again. A LOT. Just, like, not with a baby factory who thought she was in control. And perhaps when I am older and she can talk to me candidly about how I raped her before she could rape me.) She never got my phone number. I stayed away from where she was arranged to "meet" me. It was alllll a setup.
And apparently I wasn't worth another one of those. Wow, no more girls suddenly wanting my seed. Hrrm. Maybe there is a virgin smell? Big deal. I really was not intersted in 90 seconds that would haunt me for the rest of my life... and, that's what I gave her. That gal. I won't say her name. Never seen her again. When I think of her, I can think of her wondering why the fuck she ever thinks of me at all... and by now, 30 years later, I'd be happy to tell her the truth. While she finally got a second turn. I don't think she's hankering for it, right? Because she probalby oculd have fond me if it was like that.
Hopefully by now she's wise enough to realize that I did it all on purpose, and meant for her to be fuckin' dyin' to see me again whenever she hit middle age or whatever. Honestly wondered if that would actually work. How would I feel about this?
Well, I'm not getting laid, but I got fucking raped alright, because I basically killed my sexual opportunities from that point forward... oh, and I wanted to breed so fucking bad, too. Rolleyes. Gosh, I guess I really missed out? Well yeah, I could have made lots of babies with some stripper gal with messed up teeth and a body I could have rocked for years, because I actually did like her enough to love her, and I could tell at a glance. So I gave her a package she could never do anything with, prayed to Future Star Base to come around and grab that zygote, and wondered if I would start thinking about her while masturbating, or what?? No idea. I was on my own.
That was rape. Who raped who? Well, at least I did have -some- say in the matter. How was it rape? Well, I would have chosen to keep doing it, but, I was able to control myself, so since I was 15.5, well, she's a felon, I wonder if she feels guilty? Well, damn she shoulnd't.
I would have absolutely looked her up again one day if I oculd have by now, and even though it was not something I thought of often, wow, other people sure have had their opinions. Like, for some, it's just NOT acceptable.
Especially the part where I watched her fall in love and then did something memorable and then fled. Like, I guess that's cool when a female does it? This is what I have noticed: anything a woman does is okay if she thinks and says it is. And, well, I don't know what her plan was, but it sure as shit was not to teach me about needles and how to fuck efficiently, oh no. How to milk my DNA? Oh, that was her goal, and after that... oh, then she wanted a hug.
Ugh. Nasty business, this mating ritual stuff. Now, when I tell people these days, that I lost my virginity by rape, I do not get any sympathy. At all. Nor do I get any interest. At all. I think it's ruining the fantasy when a time-traveling Shieldbearer of Tartaria exploits social cues so as to ensure that she either is haunted by how she thought it would be okay for her if she succumbed... but would it be okay for me? Shit, I have no idea. It could be that my decision to do it this way, one that I thought out for myself, but did not share counsel with... you know, that might have turned some people off. "Hi, I deliberately chose to allow myself to be raped to lose my "virginity" as a form of political protest. Also time-travel." Look, I won't lie, I have often wondered.
I have not, however, wondered what the very short list of people immediately thereafter thought of my strategem. Because as I kinda hunched at the time, everyone I really liked, I still really liked, and I don't crave a return to the arms of the stripper baby factory, right? But if she had a chance, she would probably be a little less likely to just completely ignore my feelings and treat me like a piece of meat.
I am not into rape. I am into STRATEGY. And so, when all this bullshit showed up, "Why are you disrespecting the memory of Juanita Broadrick this way?" "Who?" "Oh, okay, whatever Meryl," see I knew, there was an extra layer, right?
Okay, well, I am the extra-extra layer. And, I probably raped the fuck out of the mind of that woman, because I will not lie, maybe ten years ago, I suddenly start thinking of her? Well, there was a spike, and then it faded. I guess she's kinda frustrated. Perhaps she could consider prayer, or being a travelling methamphetamine lawyer with 17 nipple rings. Seriously, she coulda done things.
Instead, she took the seed, was satisfied, and then tried to give back what she thought EYE wanted. Oh, a cuddle. Yeah, I wanted that to start with. How about this: admit that you have no clue what you just did, and I just gave you what you didn't ask for and couldn't have imagined could ever be.
I imprinted her without her consent. I mean, I don't need to do that again, I wanted the first one gone, because the pressure was very disturbing. Also, I was suspicous. Ah, that's what actual chemistry looks like. And I didn't just lay there, I was an active participant in my own statutory rape.
Did I mention that trifling with me is perhaps unwise? Well if you like to learn a thing or two without spending a dime, shove a fucking quarter in me, and since I am almost, but not quite, perfectly ambivalent about the whole experience, I'd like to point out that I kinda mindraped out in an expanding fan from that point too.
Now, I don't talk about this story much, because no one really asks, as it happens that I accidentally raped some girl a few years later, right? Actually accident. Explicit verbal consent? She said she wanted to, and I do too! Okay, well, I want to finish that book that woman who was working me suggested I read. I am half way done. "Why, yes, I would like to finish that book." It suddenly being rammed down my throat is probably the option of a couple. Might that be rape? I have no fucking idea.
I do know that I just found out something of grand significance, that probably should have been discussed, but at the time, I couldn't breathe, and I was pretty revolted by the pettiness and two-faced bullshit I saw. FAST. To what extent that had to do with me being a rape victim, I have no idea. No one has expressed any interest.
I mean, that girl I accidentally raped, would love for me to do it again, and then I convinced David and Secret Squirrel Pipestar that I was toooootally hot to rape her again... I mean, yeah, of course they bought it. THEY WERE BLASTED TO MATCH ME AND THEY THOUGHT I WAS TOTES OUT OF CONTROL.
No. Sigh. I do love my stupid goddam friends. Yeah, no, I was never, ever gonna go rape that girl. I didn't know what was gonna happen, but her, oh fuck no. ISSUES THERE. So when it was just accepted without discussion, I understood what was happening.
Don't mistake the marketing for the marked card sharp man. Seriously, here it is, what two years later? "You're cheating on me! REEEEEEE!" Like, over and over and fucking over. Wow, look, brain damage! Interesting, someone should trace that back. Meanwhile, no idea what the fuck is going on over here, but over there, oh yeah, they think they got it going on. WITHOUT DISCUSSION.
That everything exploded so handsomely is to be expected. Hi, I'm a mastermind. That it exploded here, in public... well, that's fucking performance art. Anyway, it'll be easy for She + He to forget that I was ever involved... except, like, for him, because you assholes just decided "nope, no conspiracy, but if there was, it's the hungarian nigger and the loudmouth kike, it's settled" and, goddamn it, I didn't mean to rape her, and if I had? I would have raped the fuck out of her a lot. She didn't ask for rape. So why would I? Ugh, it was so retarded. So I'm glad those two found themselves in a morass after trying to rip me off, saved me some time. "Rape fantasies?" What are those? I don't do rape fantasies.
I am a Sourceror now. Do I really wanna see that gal I totesmindraped? Oh, yeah. I'll be patient, though. Someone else is due up for an at-bat. Now, while my former tulpla has tons of sex with David, thanksfully, shutting him the fuck up for ahwile, I'm not really in a hurry to leapfrog my way into... huh, vengeance? Kanly? What is next, then?
Because I know he never believed me, but I always knew one of these crazy broads was his. And the one yammering, "I have never been here! I will always have Ballgrab! Wow we actually got into Looking Glass! I need to see you doing things before I can stop screaming at you because they're not secretly giving me the drugs that let me tolerate your hideous visage, hyoo-mon!", my hand to God, verbatim quote... I swear, I fuckin love that one, she's cute when she loses it, as long as she has been informed that I am, in fact, still here.
Oh, did she get herpes? Naw, that's shingles. Come on. Trying to kill you? Well, you killed me, why the shit would I try? Oh, I get it... yeah, and actual panick attack, because, hey guess what... yes, you were never going to get in, and yeah, maybe if you actually stopped being so transactional, I would have explained to you why we stopped having sex. And, no, that one wasn't David's. I don't even know where David is. I barely know where I am.
But I do know I am ready for someone else's latest rape fantasy to become something they weren't planning on. For example: David should be happy now. I brought his wife back to him and let him have her. FOR REAL. That happened.
He doesn't owe me anything. She -was- his. he just didn't belivee in multiple time streams, he said. Huh uh. What an asshole liar. He was getting paid to keep me unhappy, and taking things away used to work. Well, it probably still does.
But I don't see David deciding to trifle with me again. Oh, would he like to lose his wife again? I fucking bet not. No wonder he did it to me? I did it to him first in the future? Jesus, okay sure. Now, meanwhile--hey, thanks guys, I was seeking out a condition.
And watching people quietly freak out and flee the zone was AWESOME. That was filthy fucking bombtastic, and it's not like I need anyone to pump my hand in a firm handshake. Listen, i am a Virgo. I don't even need to fuck. And when I saw the limpy dimpy casually and subtly close ranks around the royal One, and legit, just... go elsewhere, as it was awkward to be that close to me, oh I know, well, look, I feel good.
I knew that I wouldn't rape anyone, without a prior agreement, and a firm one, see, I know this. However, none of them know it, and at least one of them, would likely perfer it. (It would seem that some opinions vary and 3 vs 1 when that one is floating high as balls as a hostage mindslave, well, especially when folding dimensional space, well, good luck making that rando connection again.) Well, jokes on them: I have The Key, and with that, I may unlock Our Knowledge. We've met now. Okay? Sequestration no longer works on us.
And if I'm still getting a rape request -- and it couldn't be 'rape' like duh -- after THIS long, and then there's a fucking honor guard? Really. Okay. Sure. Roflcopoters. And no one notices at first it even happens? Except for one twisted smile, and then, oh look, GONE GONE DADDY GONE? Except not anymore.
Justice has found its mark to set a match ablaze. Take my life's wife, oh look, you got a tulpa, she comes right back. See, that is how it was once supposed to be, and after getting dicked arond with for a year, do any of you think she's going to forget to remember me now? Most likely not. And, I don't even know who she is. Here's what counts: she wants to be here, and she waited a turn or two.
Great. Now, while she figures out how to ID the bodies, I am going to find these cunts who keep cutting me off from shit, and start getting experiemental in certain non-sexual forms of non-consentual rape. Now, am I serious? Oh, hell no.
I am fucking strategic. Rubini has what he craved, he claimed I would never... so I do, and then three heros from year zero are encircling and transporting away what used to be something real interesting. And this happens like within moments of me simply acknowledging to myself, "this is so lovingly assembled." Suddenly, gone from our dimension.
Now, come on. Did I talk about rape too much? Hrrm. Do I care much? Oh no. Because it used to be someone thought I was dead. Nice rumor. "That loser? Killed himself. Good riddance." Wow. I wonder how many people cried? Because they vbelieved it? I hvae no idea.
However, someone does, and someone more, has the wherewithal to find this shit out. BECAUSE I AM SUPER THRILLED.
it's not EVEN like my car or boat was stolen. Oh no. This is someone I suddenly find to align and then like it was on fire, rotated out of space. Oh, well, I think I have a pretty good idea on how that can go. Or wait, yeah, I'm totally imagining it. Right?
okay, well, first: she's back here already. a ghost? imaginary? I don't care either. like what the fuck, you gotta use like a crane hoist in case someone notices? yeah, I suppose, maybe. I would say do not bother but y'all spent A YEAR doing fucking something.
Well, that's interesting. I'm hearing quite the story on that. Surprise, it's a trap. I'm supposed to fall for things. Someone else is that desperate, it is figured I can find a way through.
It's not that middle age is desperate. It's that usually, people who can solve problems that age are either busy or total basket cases.
So that is where I am. I am remembered. I am wondering why anyone would be mindwiped here. Oh yeah, you're a lot of assholes here. It's cool that I'm not going to allow that anymore, right? Look, tell you what, bring back that empty husk, and you can show me how it's totally opposed.
Yeah, for real. People are pissed. You probably don't wanna find out why. lol. I do think we saw this coming. I mean I cannot believe it. Who would be this tacky? It was so assumed that I would breed, that there's no backup plan for me with no action?
Why do I always have to be the one who goes to the rapy? Oh, right, it's another test. Well, hang on, none of this is crucial, and if it were, I doubt it would be okay to leave this all hanging out. So anyway, that might be something to do with the rape. And then he didn't think she would figure it all out, and he certainly never thought I would be the one to tell her.
Of course I fucking told her. How did she not know? She was CONVINCED I was gonna go out and meet someone. And I didn't.
