Christmas, Part Two: This Time It's Presidential
I'd like to take the time to thank President Trump, not only for not having me taken out back behind the woodshed and beaten to death for my terrible sense of humor (please don't let/make Tiffany watch), but for taking the hit this time around. Public relations isn't always the easiest part of the job, but honestly on any given day, at some point, it's always going to be the hardest. Busted into his safe, huh? Ooooh ooooh. Into both (2!!!) safes???
But I think the takeaway here that's most important is that it was deemed to be
less dangerous to raid
The President's winter house, than it was to lay siege to
Farmhouse 55. He's probably not anymore of a threat to legitimate law enforcement agents that I am, but is cool the president he is, he's probably not a Level Zero Sourcerur Paladin with psychokinetic shielding fully upgraded with the K.∅.∅. (do you like the new font? it's not nanotech) enhancements to the mirror magick komponent, backed up by Divine Shielding (Thanks God!), and I've got a really nice leather jacket I can throw on too, it's brown, it'll probably provide a little bit of protection to anything that gets through all that. (Putting on the full Armor of God every morning... that just goes without saying, right? I can probably write a script or a macro or something, but I want to get some XP points this time, thanks Dad I mean God whatever he's up there right you didn't eat him yet, did you? he is a Pisces I'm sure he's delicious.)
Now, I know you know what I'm talking about here, because believe me: some of these foggy, thuggy little fuckheads are actually so fucking stupid that the entire notion that my technology IN FACT ACTUALLY EXISTS, blows them away in terms of the brain cells required to manage the cognitive dissonance, let alone the courage that it would take to stand up to me. The douchebag who arrested me last time, he came up on me alone, always a good idea to approach a suspect apprehend them by yourself and his senpaku eyes were rolling into his head like they were... I would just say, if I were going to wait to see the whites of the eyes before shooting, I would have been shooting, but I don't shoot people. Okay, finger pistols, sure.
I fucking teach them fucking lessons. It is what I do. Now that I've completely given up on ever masturbating again, it's all I do. So there.
p.s. by the way, I wouldn't describe a County deputy as a douchebag,
at all, under
normal circumstances but let's just put this way: I'm pretty sure I fucking recognized him, and I'm pretty sure he didn't have to be such a fucking douchebag. I don't even want to get into it. I think I made my point. And, boy howdy! He sure did, he was protecting the community and everything.
Making himself a goddam laughing stock when he testifies at my second trial,
I guess, but I guess he can burn that bridge when they come to it. I don't even fucking know anymore what it is that I'm actually pissed off about, as I truly believe I'm literally lucky to even be alive... Like why even fucking bother? (Hey, I started a trend and I'm supporting The President on this first.
Trailblazing, motherf-*click*) The relentless string of fucking Punyling bullshit tends to fucking frame you with fucking false evidence and all this fucking incriminating bullshit like if they find evidence that they want to dig into it that's one thing but when they fucking make up G-d damn role-playing fucking modules for Advanced Other Than Dragons on how to fucking trip and jam me up then it wouldn't fucking fool any kind of reasonably intelligent person, they just do it to deliberately fuck with me coz like, they're fucking annoyed that they got fucking blown out of the water I don't fucking think that's very fucking appropriate and suing them for money isn't fucking good enough. Even if they give me the money, what do I fucking buy with it something they can fucking else tax and fucking confiscate? Fuck them, fucking douchebags.
I want their daughters to masturbate to me every night after the age of 18 every goddamn night, honor system. Of course, I don't want to be creepy.
p.p.s.: Yeah I got a thing for sheriff's daughters now, fucking deal with it.